After Kotei's father was buried, in which the little emperor did not even go to the funeral for, Kotei himself began preparing himself to eventually take over his father's syndicate. Jia had to let him know right off the top that for now, Ren would have to be in charge.

"You're too young. And I mean way too young. You're not even twenty."

Kotei was understanding, nodding as he said,

"I trust no one else more then Ren."

Ren, who was standing beside Kotei when that was said, looked a little surprised at Kotei and then turned to Jia as he then said,

"I already know all I should know for now Jia. Unless something else should come up...then it's all I can do for now."

Jia nodded as he then said to Ren that as the acting oyabun until Kotei was grown, he had to be involved in that teaching the most. Ren nodded in understanding as he then thanked Jia. They still had business to talk about but Kotei didn't need to stay unless he wanted to. And of course he didn't want to. So I was asked to take the little emperor home since Toki was the only other one in the office and Jia wouldn't dare ask him. So I took the little emperor out of the office as he then sighed. It had been a few days since his father died and he had not said a word about it. I looked at him as I said,

"You okay?"

"Yeah, just a little taken back by this whole, you're now in charge of a syndicate prospect."

"Well..it's not like you have to take over anything now."

"I know...but in the future I will."

Once we were outside and started getting back in the car as I prepared to take him home, Kotei leaned over the driver seat as he said,

"Do you know what this means?"

"What?"

"That I'm almost in charge of myself."

"Almost. You're going to have to learn how to do everything for yourself sooner or later. Ren will be a lot more busy now."

"But I'll get to see him more...because we'll work together like he and my father did."

I pushed him back as I said,

"Sit down. I have to drive."

He laughed as he bounced in the back seat excitedly.

I wondered for a moment if Nagashima's death meant free game for Ren now. He did care about Kotei to begin with...and basically the only thing stopping him was Nagashima. Now, Nagashima's dead. I don't think Kotei even had the faintest idea about how much Ren cared for him. Anyway, with that new breaking merger, Jia had to stay in New York a while longer, but everyone else was given down time. Which for me, meant the usual. I spent time with Ichiro. While I was there, Katie begged me to accompany her everywhere...which I didn't always wanna do because I just wanted to spend time with Ichiro not her. But she was a kid, what could I do other then say no and break her heart. I did say no a couple of times with Ichiro's help but there were times where she wouldn't hear no for an answer and I went with her. The only place I took her to a lot was the Toys R Us in Times Square. She loved going there most because there was a ferris wheel she had to get on every time we went in. I felt like a baby sitter most of the time...that or her father because I'm the on that had to carry her since a lot of the times Ichiro did not come and I gave her nanny a break. God what I have been reduced to...nothing but a glorified baby sitter...that was all. But she wasn't a bad kid. Anyway, I took her shopping once or twice and then mostly settled in the comfort of my Ichiro. My....I shouldn't say my. Ichiro was nothing of mine and I was nothing of his. Nonetheless when he looked at me from his straddled position, it made me smile. The next morning, I woke up on my side, my hair falling all over the place since Ichiro makes me sleep with it out as I sat up, letting it fall back. I turned to see him sleeping beside me, on his back, his head tilted towards me, his hand near his beautiful lips as his blondish red bangs fell over his eyes. I leaned over him, stealing a kiss before I got up and stretched.

Some time passed. After a couple of weeks, Jia packed it up and headed back to Tokyo. I guess he was only comfortable being in his kingdom. Again, he gave no pressure to go back, but I decided to go back anyway, mostly because I rather miss Ichiro then get bored of him. So I said bye to my own doll as I finally went back home. I fell asleep on the plane trip back as I always did, waking up only when the plane landed. I got up and followed Jia out as Toki yawned and rubbed his eyes on his way out. Aoki and Aya were not too far behind us as Jun trailed behind them. We all gathered in the airport for a moment as Jia said we had time off until further notice. I didn't mind it so much, I needed time to mostly sleep and catch up on getting rest.

So, I got home, took a hot shower and crawled into bed by myself for the first time in forever. Sleep was the first thing on my mind. That and plenty of it. For the first week of the time I was back in Tokyo, it was all I did. I slept day in, day out for a week. Finally when I just fucked up my sleeping pattern badly enough I started falling asleep at odd hours, I started picking up my night life again. I called Hisoka and we went out for drinks, parties, clubs, anything to have fun. When we weren't doing that, we had dinner or lunch, depending on whatever time I woke up. One night as we sat down at our usual sushi bar, Hisoka turned to me and said,

"You've gotten so much older. Mentally I mean."

I nodded as I set my glass down and said,

"That'll happen after being put through hell and back."

"How was New York? You were there for a while."

"I got the sexiest plaything in New York so New York was fine."

He laughed as he said,

"It's so good to be a top head."

"Yes it is."

We laughed for a moment as I went back to picking up my sushi rolls with my chopsticks as Hisoka looked at me and said

"How old are you now?"

"Twenty-one about to be twenty-two."

"You spent three years here?"

"Almost four."

"And you went through hell and back so soon."

"Has to be soon in this line of work."

"I know."

We ate a little more as I said,

"You seeing anyone?"

"Not in so many words."

"Just fucking someone."

"More or less."

We exchanged a laugh as he then said,

"Sorry to change the mood but you heard anything from Miya?"

I shook my head effortlessly as I said,

"Not since Sugihara."

"That long?"

"Yeah. That long."

It had almost been a year. I remember there was a period in my life where I couldn't think of Miya without my heart clenching and pain sitting at the pit of my stomach. But now, I effortlessly said his name, talked about what happened and could even easily say I have not seen him in close to a year. I was surprised with myself.

Over the time I started spending back in Tokyo I cleaned up my apartment. I made everything mine again I was no longer in pain or remorse over anything anymore. I didn't go back to my old ways, but I just stopped hiding everything like I did before. I had free time, there was no need for me to be in a suit and tie or dress pants. I wore my jeans again, wore my usual stuff like I did before. I kept my hair long but tied up, I carried my cell phone in my cargo pockets and my gun, my newest pride and joy a .38 caliber, a black widow spider, my personal mark on the handle, complete with Teflon bullets I snuck through underground, lower head connections, in the back of my pants, tucked underneath my shirt, my butterfly blade in the folds of my jean pockets, my cigarettes with the plastic still around them with my lighter tucked between the two and I walked through Tokyo like that. I was more awake with myself and though I still wasn't speaking to anyone in the syndicate, I realized that, one I hardly spoke to them anyway. Two, I wasn't letting it get in the way of whatever business I had to do so, whatever. I let it go. I would have to learn not to get so attached. That'll teach me.

After a while, I even decided to pick up Gravitation again. I had stopped reading and now I missed it so I went to go find again. I was tempted to go to the same book store I usually went to, but I thought it best for me not to, I rather not run the risk of seeing Miya there. I just went to another manga shop in the Ginza district and got the rest of the series there. I went back to enjoy it while I did nothing but wait for the next big thing. During the down time, Jia held meeting with Toshimasa again. The pretty young thing that was now forever marked with a limp and walked with an ebony cane, still had his light brown hair falling around his beautiful black kohl lined eyes with full dark pink lips he licked each time before he spoke. I wasn't there for the entire meeting. I came in late because I was not let known an exact time. But I saw Toshimasa sitting in the chair in front of Jia's desk while a couple of the top heads stood near Jia's desk, the business heads mostly while the rest of lingered near the door. Toshimasa's delicate hands came to the arm rest of the black leather chair as his cane rested beside him, near his fingertips. He spoke to Jia about business, the casinos were doing fine, no mention of problems other then a few minor scrapes with people not being able to pay off debt when they had to. The lower heads took care of that. Other then that, everything was fine. Jia nodded, saying he was glad to know all these things. Anything else, he wanted the business heads to know. Tai took over from there, inviting Toshimasa to come to his office which was across the hall from Jia's. Toshimasa slowly rose to his feet, grabbing his cane and he walked around the chair and excused himself from Jia as he left with Tai, Gabriel, Aya and Akio as they went to look over the last of the books. As for the rest of us, we were dismissed. Another part of business that happened over the couple of months we went over was Ren calling back and forth to Jia. They kept their connect well along with the Itto Ketsuen and the Yami. Jia finally decided that Ren should bring Kotei to Japan in order to meet his other associates like Nishiki who was a big part of Jia's empire. Ren agreed and said he would be there in a few weeks once he got everything organized.

We prepared for their arrival in the coming days. I wasn't worried about much because Kotei and I got along pretty well. Plus he would be busy working a lot so it's not like he could bother me as much as he would like. By the end of the year, as it was cold, the snow coming down every now and then, my coat on, leather gloves on my hands as I walked to work that morning, my loose bangs fell around my face as I yawned and stopped for a moment to light a cigarette. Kotei and Ren were scheduled to come within two days so we were all called in to have a meeting with Jia over the final details as to what was happening because the Itto Ketsuen and the Yami were also arriving to make the meeting with Nishiki complete. I stopped, tucking back my bangs behind my ears, I lit my cigarette as I turned away from the wind and then turned back and began walking, exhaling smoke from my mouth along with the heat from my body. I reached up to my face again, sweeping my hair aside as I started going towards the subway station. As I grabbed the railing to go down, I accidentally touched someone's hand in the process. I was about to apologize insincerely and go on with my life as I looked down at who's hand it belonged to when I was faced with a pair of dark brown eyes. Eyes I once knew so well. Eyes I lost myself in and that held my humanity, my love, my emotions. It was Miya. And Miya was different. No longer my beautiful, elegant one, his angled brown hair gone, cut short, short and sticking in wayward twisted locks. Both eyes peered up at me, full lips were parted slightly as if to say something, he wore a heavy dark gray coat. It was ugly and unlike him and also he wore jeans and flat shoes. Everything was unlike him. I would have dismissed it was him at all, if not for those eyes. But I was not taken like I had been so many years ago. My heart skipped no beats, my stomach did not turn and tie itself into knots, my mouth did not gap and my eyes remained normal and stable. And though the moment seemed to stop, it picked right back up as I smoked the last of my cigarette, flicked it away and said, coldly, quickly and in my monotone voice,

"Gomen."

And kept going down the stairs. I had a meeting to go to.

I gave it no other thoughts to it. I waited for my train and once it arrived, I boarded and went on my way to Jia's building. Once I got there, I removed my gloves and stuffed them in my pocket as I went upstairs to Jia's office as I unbuttoned my coat as I went to his office and stood by the door. After we went over the final details and we were dismissed, I went home again, picking up dinner on my way and then I sat down and changed, ate and went to sleep. It was strange for a moment to think how someone once could make me cry, broke me so badly I fucked up and was willing to even give up my job could now not even make me blink an eye. I yawned and rubbed my eyes as I turned over and soon fell asleep.

---------------------------

References

-The ferris wheel in the Toys R Us that Joryu mentions in Times Square is real. The toy store is so huge it has about five different floors and a ferris wheel on the side of the store.

-The .38 Caliber is Joryu's new gun. His old one was not mentioned before so the .38 is called his new gun. His personal insignia, a black widow is marked on the handle of the gun, the same as his back tattoo.

-Teflon bullets are real bullets that are outlawed since they pierce through anything included bullet proof vests.

-Gravitation is a real manga written by Maki Murakami. Previously mentioned in other chapters, Joryu stopped reading it, but is now resuming it.