yes, it's winter in edmonton and just in time for halloween. my mom used to make me and my sisters' costumes baggy enough for snowsuits and boots underneath. i remember being a very pink, very puffy bunny one year. 

i decorated the entryway last night and i think it should scare the wee ones. heh heh. forget christmas; *this* is the most wonderful time of the year. 

i haven't had the wherewithal to write here lately. my stupid brain is snatching serotonin away from my synapses too quickly. maybe i don't have enough of the p11 protein. who knows? i hate saying that i'm depressed. it sounds so freaking whiny. 

gods. i will tough it out - this can't possibly last much longer. a couple of months is the usual amount of time. i'm sure it's related to the stress of the new job, which, thankfully, has been greatly reduced.  

and worse i may be yet; the worst is not so long as we can say 'this is the worst.' 

i've been ordered asked to go to a Synergy social function on thursday night. i can't express how much i enjoy meeting strangers, laughing at their jokes and engaging in inane, useless conversation small talk. 

holy schmokes. i just got word that the deal on new office space has closed. hooray for no highway driving. boo for coordinating a move that consolidates two offices. so much for less stress! :D 

it's about lunchtime now. i think i'm going to go find some soup.

aside: did you know that McEvil's fries contain beef? ...those bastards. 

    Highlights of Clean Air Act

    Canadian Press

    Thursday, October 19, 2006

OTTAWA -- Highlights of the Conservative government's proposed Clean Air Act:

-- By 2011, develop new regulations for vehicle fuel consumption.

-- By 2025, set national targets for smog and ozone levels.

-- By 2050, reduce greenhouse gas emissions between 45 and 65 per cent from 2003 levels.

-- No mention of the Kyoto Protocol and the emissions targets the government of Canada committed to in 2002.

-- Harmonize vehicle emissions standards with those of the United States over the next 12 months.

-- Harmonize regulations with those of the U.S. for volatile organic compound emissions in consumer and commercial products over the next year.

-- Over the next three years, discuss and set "intensity based" targets for reducing greenhouse gas emissions, rather than total emissions targets, for major emitters.

-- Negotiate with provinces to create harmonized system for mandatory reporting of air emissions, reduction of regulatory overlap.

-- Create environmental damages fund from non-compliance fines to be applied directly to cleanup.

© Canadian Press 2006

if you're wondering, yes, those are the *highlights.* and, yes, they amount to a whole lot of nothing. 

intensity based targets. bah! hoping that 50 years of technological advancements will reduce pollution. bah! waiting 20 years before *setting* national smog reduction targets. bah! BAH! 

i figured i should let Environment Canada know how i felt. my letter:

I don't often have visceral reactions to proposed legislation, but I can say, without a smidge of hyperbole, that reading the highlights of the Clean Air Act in the National Post made my stomach turn and my skin crawl. I'm very disappointed. *Please* try harder. 

you too can email these bozos. it's easy as pie. you could even sign off with something like, "I may be from Alberta, but I don't think you walk on water." 

after receiving not one, but *two* personalized letters back from the alberta government in response to my last complaint, i'm thinking about sending more. 

maybe i'll start a little collection of responses. i could scan them and create a section in my stupid blog where you can see how government functionaries try to appease a disgruntled constituent. 

the minister:

*shudder*  so angry.

yes sirree. next week will be better. this week i had to deal with several crazy people, one of whom was a lawyer making stupid empty threats. i had a sewer line collapse, which meant finding accommodations for a bunch of tenants. a furnace died...

and now i've got one of my employees nattering about how her "computer doesn't work." i asked for details and she says, "well, i have no email and i can't get into things." things, she says! 

*sigh*

i need to recharge, otherwise my head will asplode. really. 

"If you agree, pass it on. If you can read this - Thank a teacher! If you are reading it in English -Thank a soldier!!"

i don't understand the last one. 

"canada's new government," or whatever harper is forcing his minions to call the Government of Canada (you know, that kind of bullshit only increases my loathing for them), announced the Clear Air Act. i haven't really looked at the details, but it seems to exclude the alberta oilsands from stringent regulation and it also seems to reduce emissions "intensity," not actual levels of greenhouse gasses. 

"Over the next year we will be laying down a framework and working on targets and we will produce intensity-based target the over the short, medium and long term." –Stephen Harper, CTV Newsnet, 10 October 2006

"By (Alberta's) own numbers, its greenhouse-gas emissions would rise by 39 per cent over two decades. That's what intensity-based targets means. The absolute emissions continue to go up even though the emissions, based on a per economic activity, continue to go down." –Dale Marshall, climate-change policy analyst from David Suzuki Foundation, Vancouver Province, 11 October 2006

i wonder if it will be as effective as the epa's similarly named Clear Skies Initiative. 

ahem. 

although, it heartens me to see that the conservative party was at least reading the NDP platform from the last election, if not comprehending it. the NDP came up with the name of the act. 

i'm thrilled to see that the hour back on tv. seriously. i love this show. i mention this because, yesterday, george was going through some emails he received about his interview with belinda stronach. some guy wrote in and suggested that george lacked certain anatomical features because he didn't ask if she'd slept with tie domi. 

i would like to offer my official thanks to george for his comment that we'd *never* ask a male MP that kind of question in canada (at least, not since dreamy pierre trudeau left office). 

i'm sick of people treating stronach like she's some barbie doll. i'm sure she's aware that being an attractive, wealthy woman is going to make for pretty pictures in the newspapers, but, c'mon. who cares? 

politicians have sex, just like real people. and, frankly, if extra-marital sex is the most immoral thing a politician has done, canada is going to be just fine. 

This past Friday at the White House, President Bush signed the Pets Evacuation and Transportation Standards (PETS) Act into law.

This landmark legislation, which was strongly backed by The Humane Society of the United States, requires local and state disaster plans to include provisions for household pets and service animals in the event of a major disaster or emergency. When I was in the Gulf during Hurricane Katrina, I saw the government's failure to have a plan for helping animals. Tens of thousands of animals suffered terribly and were lost or left behind because our communities and responders didn't have a plan in place.

With more than 358 million pets in the United States residing in 63 percent of American households, the PETS Act will help ensure that Americans never again are faced with the horrifying choice of abandoning their pet and finding their way to safety, or staying with their pet and remaining in a hazardous, and potentially life-threatening situation.

Some states and local communities have already engaged in disaster preparedness for animals, and with a federal law now in place, the future for you and your companion animal in a disaster is much brighter.

sweet!

oddly enough, the most entertaining part of sg has turned out to be the bulletin board. not that the pictures aren't nice to look at. 

you probably aren't interested in this (especially rae), but do you have any idea how long it's been since i've slept with a woman? bloody hell... years and years. it sucks. *rolls eyes* 

so today i got the news that british girl is leaving us.  :(   i suppose she was too good to be true. i'll have to go through the interview and training processes again ... and that's the part that makes me the saddest. 

sigh. i'm hungry. i'm going to forage.

my boss - my father - can be so incredibly annoying when he decides to micro-manage something that he's had *no* involvement with ever before. we had one completely random (and not really significant) misfiling happen at the office today and, suddenly, he's making new policies and trying to drastically change procedures to prevent something similar from happening again. 

sure ... mistakes are bad, but his ideas aren't going to actually do anything. it's kind of like banning coffee and gel shoe inserts from planes to prevent terrorist attacks. have those airport security types actually confiscated any explosives? i'm sure we would have heard about it if they had. 

"see?! our policies protect you from the evil doers! we're amazed at our own effectiveness!"

yeah. i'm putting my foot down.

my mom got a call today from her niece (we'll call her mooch) who hasn't spoken to her in years. mooch wants my mom to call her sister (mooch's mom) to ask for money ... $300. 

i'd probably put a bullet through my head if i were pushing 40 and had to ask my aunt to ask my mom for $300. my ridiculous extended family. 

there were times i missed having contact with my rather numerous relations. i know better now.

heh ... british girl got to meet one of our more melodramatic tenants today. this tenant *always* pays her rent late and is surprised every time she receives an eviction notice. i eavesdropped on their conversation from a neighbouring office:

drama queen: hello there - i have a cheque for you.

british girl: oh, thank you. *smiles* - would you like a receipt?

dq: yes, thanks. hey, you've got an accent. you're british, aren't you? 

bg: yes, i am.

dq: oh fantastic! i just *adore* british people! you probably don't mind the cold, rainy weather then? ha ha ha!

bg: *chuckles* no, i suppose not

dq: hey, who's that man who works here with the brush cut and the ear piece? he looks like a gangster! i answered my door and i was just terrified! who was that?!

bg: ohh, he's a property manager here. he's quite nice, actually. 

dq: hmm... *suspicious* ... *launches into long winded story about why rent is late*

yes ... the drama queen is lucky she spoke to british girl and not me. i'm less likely to suffer through her stories with a smile on my face. just thinking about that woman makes my head hurt. 

this is the same one who came tearing into my office, flapping her most recent eviction notice in the air and announcing that she has "a reputation to uphold in the community and just who do we think we are, giving her an eviction." gods. just pay your rent and you can do whatever you want with your reputation, woman. 

tedious.

i think i've done enough bitching about my job. 

the kat and i are going to my mom's for thanksgiving dinner tomorrow. i need to make food for us before we go. i think i'm doing something like a turnip/parsnip/sweet potato loaf wrapped in phyllo pastry again. mmm... and mushroom gravy and stuffing. 

my aunt is bringing a vegetable with veggie-cheese dish and my mom is making mashed potatoes with, i presume, becel margarine. now, kat, this is for you: please, please eat a spoonful of those dishes, despite the non-vegan-ness. the veggie-cheese has casein in it and the becel has whey, but the ladies are making an effort to please us.   :)

     "what? you can't pay your rent because...? *twitch* *twitch* don't mess with me, man."

i'm placing my advertising for a new resident manager, since the existing one didn't seem to understand the chain of command when it was explained to her yesterday. 

ohh, happy day. soon, i'll be done with that woman and i'll one of *my* people in there. one that isn't bat-shit insane and constantly looking to be "protected" from the evil emma by her husband-man-thing or army guy or any other man who happens to be around. *stupid*  heh ... at least army guy knows not to bite the hand that feeds. 

i had fun listening to british girl talk to a british guy who was in the office today. they were talking animatedly about football and manchester united ... and stuff. it went over my head, but they were happy to connect with each other. i suppose i'd talk about hockey if i encountered a canadian in england.

ugh. i took a muscle relaxant for my twitch. i feel groggy.  :P   time to run away

it notes john howard's comments about australian values and that people who can't abide by parliamentary, secular law should get out. love it or clear off, mate.

and you know, to be honest, i agree ... the government and the laws should be secular. what annoys me about these emails (and i have yet to see one that doesn't follow the pattern), is that after all the ranting about canadian/american/australian values, there's a bit about how we follow *christian* teachings.

pardon?

does the author not understand how sharia law and christian law are *not* secular? bah. every one of these jingoistic, ridiculous emails misses the point.

want to do something fun? here's a game. my american friends will recognize some of these faces from history class.

it's not that i'm evil, i'm just ... pissed off.

anyone in edmonton knows how incredibly difficult it is to find subcontractors. *especially* subcontractors that are willing to bump your company's needs ahead of the line. 

i had a roofing company go out to a building of mine in one of the little satellite communities around edmonton. the building where my crazy building manager lives. the building manager who called me 'snotty.' 

because our two companies have a great relationship, we were going to have this small project taken care of right away. i thought, "fantastic!" apparently, my building manager didn't agree.

the crew gets to the building and gets ready to start the job. my manager flies out of her suite and accosts them, "YOU should have given me more than a day's notice! i can have any other company come out to do this!" 

the answer the crew gave her: "ok. you do that."

and they packed up and left - not surprisingly. 

this, of course, left me in the awkward position of trying desperately to make nice with this roofer. i don't know if he'll go back now. not with that harpy living there.

as you may know, this is only the most recent item in a laundry list of problems i've had with this woman. i've listened to so many complaints about her attitude ... i can't take it anymore. time to cut her loose and move her out by the end of the month. 

i'll try not to click my fingertips together when we talk this week.

if you're not interested in clicking on a link (i'm looking at you, kat), this is a timeline of events related to the global struggle against terrorist islamo-fascism (or whatever the hell they're calling it now). the timeline starts in 1990 and has detailed notes, with citations, about who said what when ... and also when something was actually reported to the public.

...like the 4-year lapse between when the nsa started warrant-less wiretapping and when people found out about it.

i'm still stunned that people are so terrified of terrorists that they're, for the most part, ok with that. like the terrorists are the ones to be afraid of...

anyway

we're going to figure out our benefits plan through the kat's work tonight. i need to see a dentist - i broke a tooth a while ago and it's annoying me.

i know it's stupid, but i'm really nervous about dentists ... i haven't been to one in a while because of that. *rolls eyes* maybe i'll go to one where they conk you out with drugs before doing a procedure. geh. i'm determined to get over this hang up.

know of any good dentists in edmonton? *sigh* preferably one without a crazed hygenist who mauls you and flops an enormous breast on your head while scraping your teeth... (i have issues from my childhood.)

no, the breast thing wasn't any fun. it was disturbing.

"No emma, you can't have the other fluoride flavors - they're for adulgrown ups. You have to have bubblegum/banana. Here's your prize: bubblegum-flavored toothpaste! I know you kids love bubblegum."

gods. i hated that woman.

and, i still hate bubblegum- and banana-flavored anything.