TO TEACH IS TO LEARN: A Process Analysis Essay describing theinstruction of children with special needs


 It’s cold, it’s raining, and worst of all it’s 9 A.M on a Sunday morning.  You gradually make your way out from underneath the warmth of your covers.  After a shower, your mind attempts, with substantial difficulty, to adjust to its new awakened state.  You gather the new flash cards and other activities you prepared the night before for this morning’s lesson.  As you dress, you try to get yourself excited for apple juice and graham crackers, matching games, and music class.  Somewhere in the back of your mind, you’re saying, “Maybe today is a snow day, classes are cancelled, and they forgot to call you.”  Yet, it being May and fifty degrees, you come to terms with the fact that you are not going back to sleep.  Instead you must awaken your imagination, your creativity and your patience.  It is a Sunday morning, you are sixteen, and you are doing the same you have done every Sunday morning for over four years: you are going to your temple to teach fifth grade Hebrew and Jewish Studies.  Not to just any fifth graders, these children are special--unique in their qualities, in their individual needs, and most especially in the grand impact they have on you.
    You turn the key to your classroom door, turning on the lights and opening the windows, awakening it from its week long slumber.  You sharpen pencils, gather markers, and pull out the textbooks, games, and worksheets.  With fifteen minutes before class begins, you travel up the long flight of stairs to the Hebrew School office, reviewing your lesson plan as you walk. 
    A fellow teacher approaches you and says, “Oh, you look unusually exhausted this morning.”  You give a shy, somewhat embarrassed smile.  You are no more tired than you usually are.  This is just another Sunday. 
    “Well I don’t blame you,” she responds, “the anticipation of twenty students on a Sunday  morning will do that to you.”  What she does not know is that you are not working with twenty students.  You are only awaiting two.  Yet those two students will require an equal amount of motivation, energy, enthusiasm, and focus as those twenty.  You will spend an equivalent amount of time, preparation, and must have equal skill as that same teacher of twenty.  This is inconceivable to many and you question it yourself on a regular basis.  But that is exactly what working with children with special needs is: questioning yourself, your generalizations about people, and many of the simple methods and facts which the foundations of your education, relationships, and behaviors are rooted in.  It is defying limitations, standards, and others’ expectations.  It is acquiring the ability to surpass the confines of your imagination and your individual thought process and evolve to accommodate someone else’s.  It is allowing yourself to grow and develop along with your students.  Most challenging, it is asking for the trust and the commitment of two young children-- two young children who, standing only four feet tall, created a challenge which towered over you like a giant.  It is proving to yourself that the giant which intimidated you at first, appearing to be an unconquerable task, is now a reality and what you thought would be a frilly baby sitting job has formed a relationship which has superseded all of your expectations.
    “Emilyyyy,” your train of thought is broken and your day has begun as Cara enters the classroom.  It always amazes you how lively she is on Sunday mornings.  Her consistent motivation is almost as mind-blowing as her great discipline.
    You become distracted as you hear the sounds of space ships crashing and an array of other imaginary noises.  No matter how you prepare yourself, you never quite find yourself ready for Spencer’s tremendous imagination.  “My father isn’t Jewish, I still don’t get why I need to be here.”
    You already become frustrated at how he uses his great intelligence to stick a knife directly at the spot he knows will strike you the deepest.  “Spencer, be careful.  Don’t cross that line so early in the morning.  Could you try to imagine why you might have to be here?”
    “Mommy”
    “Yep.  Plus, what would we do without you?  Although you might not like those reasons, you’re here.  Let’s get going.”  
    There in lies your very own contradiction: your students.  Working with a student with special needs is a tribulation in itself.  Teaching two who are similar can often be a handful.  Having two children with special needs in a classroom for two hours who are polar opposites of each other can be an incredible ordeal for the teacher.  You have taken on a great responsibility and a great challenge.  Now how do you go about tackling it?  An imperative part of being a teacher is feeling comfortable enough and free enough to allow yourself to become a student.  Firstly, before even entering the classroom, you must know who your students are medically.  Seeking additional aid outside of your workplace as well as a general basis of knowledge is most definitely essential.
    Let us relate this back to Cara and Spencer.  Before he even entered kindergarten, Spencer was diagnosed with Asberger’s Syndrome.  This is a neurological disorder which commonly affects boys with normal language and intellectual development.  It is a disorder which primarily impinges on social and communication skills, varies greatly in severity, and has many parallels with Autism.  With the abundance of knowledge on Asberger’s Syndrome, you can teach yourself new techniques which will make his experience with you much less difficult.  With the sensitivity to smell and touch, characteristic of Asberger’s, you will know not to wear strong perfume.  When his parents go away and he complains of unbearably painful itchiness you will know about his sensitivity to fabrics and the way this relates to a heightened need for sameness.  You will find a way to distract him and a way of teaching without doing work, a concept foreign to many, yet crucial for these circumstances.  When Spencer complains of the voices in his head, you will know that he hears things and see things you will never even be able to imagine. 
    Most importantly, you will be able to keep in mind that despite many of his comments, eccentricities, and often intolerable behavior, it is truly not out of rudeness.  You will know how to discipline and proceed accordingly and how to help him understand what he has done wrong after the fact, which is the point where he is able to reflect and think clearest.  As he asks you, “What are all those red dots on your face,” and you feel that you want to scream apologizing for disappointing him but since you had to come teach him this morning you did not have sufficient time to beautify, you will think twice.  You will remember that although you know how smart he is, children with Asberger’s have an unusually high level of naivete and he is simply asking a question, a remote, but significant for him, effort to try to relate on a social level. 
    As you gain the consistency he needs for a productive relationship, you will be able to discover his incredible capabilities as a student.   Although this will frustrate you more when he does not apply them in a productive manner, this new knowledge will help you sympathize and assist you in maintaining your patience with him.  Although there will be days where you will leave feeling insignificant, useless, maybe even want to cry out with frustration, there will be other times which will outweigh them.  After you bypass his efforts to get you off topic, his disparaging comments about Judaism, and his abundant science fiction and biology lessons he will, flawlessly, read a line of Hebrew and proceed to relate it to a previous Jewish Studies lesson.  You will sit back, almost aghast having not seen it coming.  On his bad days you will return home learning your own lesson on how to work with him, how to work with yourself, and on his good days he will go home with his.   
    Contrasting with Spencer, Cara does not have a “textbook classification.”  Some of her behaviors have been compared to mild down syndrome, in the sense that you can clearly see that physically something is not entirely “normal” about her.  She pales in comparison to the massive intellectual capacity that Spencer has, yet greatly compensates for it with an intense drive and ability to relate to others her age which Spencer lacks.  Cara also has a definite speech impediment related to her condition and has shown some signs of dyslexia, often reversing letters.  She is a child who is always smiling and yearns for your affection, your attention, and to be treated as if she is an equal.  This is something she rarely finds with a third grade reading level and kindergarten speech yet something she must receive from you to win her trust and her adoration.  By forming a relationship with the student, allowing them to look at you as a friend rather than an authoritative teacher, they will enjoy being with you as well as value your companionship.  They will trust you enough to open up to you and permit you to see their natural behaviors and thus allow you to learn how to best work with them.  With the amount of extra intense work she does during the week for her regular schooling she must be a child who enjoys coming to Hebrew school rather than dreads it.  This is rare among the average fifth grader but once achieved it will create a student driven to learn and who enjoys it.  They will have the motivation to work and you, feeling proud of your accomplishment, will continue to have the motivation to teach.  Although this type of relationship seems like a simple check on your list of things to do,  it will prove to be essential for you both to have a successful experience and must be given much attention.  In the end, you will be proud to say that you have a best friend who is in fifth grade and who has such respect for you.  You will realize you have that same great adoration and admiration for her too.    
    Yet now you can see one of your first problems: these are two very different people.  While Spencer is craving to move on and learn something new, Cara is at risk for being left behind in Spencer’s whirlwind of learning.  Yet when everything seems to be clicking with Cara, Spencer is having one of his less than good days and you need to pause to discipline.  You must, without question, find some common ground between the two.  With a student with a social disorder this is far from easy but hands on games will become your new best friend. You will need a survival kit in your classroom for break times from book learning or when sitting in front of a textbook is just not going to cut it for your easily distracted students.  First is the hacky sack which you can pass around the table.  Each toss of the hacky sack can be a different word in the current prayer or sentences which you are working on.  This provides a motor action which will keep everyone paying attention as well as a relatively exciting method of reinforcing the material. 
    When everyone really needs to move around, there is a basketball game where each syllable is a different type of bounce with the ball.  Each person passes the ball around the group, imitating the sounds along with the bounces.  This is a guaranteed excellent way of motivating everyone with a field trip to a large empty space and a requirement to get up off your feet and “get the blood in your body flowing.”  Matching games and other card games are also a fun way of attempting to bring your two students and yourself together on some common ground.  Although many of these activities require much brainstorming and preparation before hand, when it saves you when both students are having a rough day or when they finally are able to read that line of text you have been stuck on for weeks, it will be well worth the great efforts.  
    Although your new knowledge about your students’ disorders has most definitely played a role in your innovative games, your best chance of finding what is going to work best for your students is their personalities.  Especially in Cara’s situation, where you really have little to no outside knowledge sources, you must place great emphasis on your one on one experiences with your students and the information relayed to you by those close to them.  This leads us into your next learning experience: finding out who your students are on a personal level.  You will learn much about your students through anecdotes from their past teachers, their parents, as well as your basic time in the classroom with them. 
    In the cases of both students, getting to know their habits and interests will prove effective.  With Spencer, relating Hebrew letters to Pokémon characters will help him have more of an incentive to learn.  With Cara, knowing who her best friends are, noticing her interest in shopping, and being aware of her need to be like everyone else will set you on track to becoming her confidante.  This aspect of teaching is entirely based on your perceptiveness as a human being.  It is studying a person’s gestures, the tone of their voice, eccentricities which are heightened on certain days or a difference in level of conversation and topic.  Through this, you will be able to rule out which of your teaching techniques have been successful and which have failed.  If you focus enough of your energy on this area, you will be able to anticipate when a break will be needed, when a melt down is on the way, or when someone’s just having a bad day.  You will also be able to recognize days when your students are focused enough for you to take your lesson to the next level or push them to that next step that they might not have been able to achieve normally.  With this heightened sense of sensitivity towards the behaviors and habits of others, you will see dramatic improvements within the classroom and eventually realize that you now look at the world quite differently.  You will see that your perception of what is important to take note of will evolve beyond belief and your interpersonal skills will be greatly improved.
    Yet after having hands on experience with your students in the classroom, reflecting on your sessions together when you return home, taking note of tips to yourself or unusual behaviors, you will have realized that it is impossible to record a complete set of rules or steps to follow to teach someone with special needs.  You must simply learn it yourself--not through a textbook, or a professor, but experience.  People can give you theories, explanations, hypotheses, yet why children behave the way they do will always be somewhat of a mystery to adults.  Although it is is rather nerve wracking to be expected to rely on your own intuition and knowledge to guide two children through their next year at Hebrew school, that is what being a teacher is--being confidante in who you are, your capabilities, and using them to be responsible for others.  Yet, at the same time, it is opening yourself to new experiences and new information.  Teaching is learning.  Although that may sound awkward now, after reflecting over a few years experience it will become clear.
    After the end of your two hours together, you, Cara, and Spencer pack yourselves up to return home.  You watch them, realizing what respect they have for you, as a teacher, as an adult, and as a friend.  You have seen how much they  have progressed and how they have developed from children into people with opinions of their own.  Yet as you are walking towards the door of your classroom your eyes catch your reflection in the mirror with your two students at your side.  You see how you have developed such patience and tolerance. You recognize how much respect you have for your pupils.  You see how much you have learned and how much you have achieved. You smile at how they have changed your life and you have changed theirs.  You look at your two friends in the mirror and realize that they will always hold a special place in your heart.
    Cara grabs your arm and pulls you out from your trance.  You shut off the lights  and lock the door, tucking your classroom in for another week of rest.  It knows you will be back and it will be prepared for another day of matching games, snack time, Hebrew letters and learning for both you and your students.          

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