My, oh my... what a helluva Christmas present to wake up and find that
sexy devil Kevin Richardson resting beside you. For a moment I just sat and
watched him sleep. He really glowed. I gawked at him like a little girl who had
just spotted the perfect puppy a the pet shop window. I rolled over and started
to climb out of bed. At that instant a strong arm caught me around the waist,
again, in one swift motion. "Where are you going?" he said in my ear.
I smiled and moved to face him kissed him, "Well, nowhere
now."
"How are you doing?" he asked softly. I knew what he
meant.
"I feel good, Kevin. Last night was..." I couldn't get
a word out that would do
justice to what had happened between us.
"Yeah.. it was..." and obviously neither could he. We
shared a light laugh. I closed my eyes when he placed a hand against my cheek.
"You are so beautiful..."
"Look who's talkin,'"
After we took a shower I found Kevin examining a picture on my
dresser. It was a
black and white but I took it back in '93, when I was seventeen. I still looked
the same-- same hair, same eyes, same everything... except I no longer owned
the black leotard I was spotting in the picture. "So it's true.." he
said softly. I don't think he intended for me to hear but I had. I was right
behind him.
"What's true?"
"That you were a dancer?" he asked me setting it back
where he'd retrieved it
from. Kev turned to face me.
"How did you know?"
"Well, for one, look at those legs," he joked and
smacked my thigh. I blushed. "No, really, Kevin... how did you know?"
"Liv told me that day at the hospital."
I shrugged, "Way, way long time ago. But I don't anymore.. I
don't even talk
about it."
"Why don't you dance anymore?"
I looked at him funny, "Didn't you just hear me say I don't
even talk about it?
That must mean I don’t wanna talk about it." I hated to be so
defensive about it. It was just that he was asking a question I didn't want to
answer.
"Hey, look... I'm sorry. I was just curious."
I exhaled sharply, feeling myself break inside when he looked
into my eyes.
"Okay... okay. Here's the story.." I started out of the room and he
followed me down the stairs. I turned away from him, the truth was in my head
but didn't escape my lips. "I started dancing when I was.... five. It was
fun, something to do, you know? And uh... when I graduated I got accepted to Julliard
and I went there for a year, dropped out and moved back home." I wanted to
hit myself for lying to him. But the truth would make him wish he never met me.
I just knew that if he knew the truth he would wanna take back the night we'd
shared before.
"Why didn't you just stay in New York?" he asked.
"I like it better in Florida... okay, we're startin' to play
twenty questions here and
that’s against the rules. I told you why I don’t dance anymore..."
"No you didn't."
I slowly turned to face him. "Because, it wasn't fun anymore...."
I took Kevin home but didn't go inside. Before he got out he
leaned over and
kissed me tenderly on the lips. "Look, I didn't mean to upset you
earlier.."
"No, no it's okay," I smiled, "I just get a little
over dramatic."
"Do you think you'll ever do it again?" he asked, our
eyes locked. I didn't even
have to think about it and my eyes lowered.
"No."
"You want me to call you?"
"Oh please... do not hesitate." We shared one last kiss
and then I watched him get out and go in his house. I leaned my head back
against the seat. Shame on me. Kevin thought he knew the truth about my
stopping dancing. The truth was I knew the truth, both truths. I was in love
with Kevin and I couldn't let the other truth get in the way of that. And I
know what you are thinking 'oh, it's not that big a deal'... it was. It really
was.