'Not Your Mutha Fuckin' Punk Ass Nigger' Project
Elvert Xavier Barnes Photography . Writings . Ads
In the black community gay black men are often known as 'punks'. Not to be confused with punk rockers or MTV's Punked for those openly gay black men who sleep and/or associate with white men and not unlike many who get punked on MTV often such relationships which I now refer to as negationships necessarily result in the black male 'getting played for a nigger'.
What do I mean when I say 'played for a nigger?' Certainly there no misgivings of what it means when one is 'punked' on MTV. Then why do some find it difficult to understand when I suggest that they have 'played me for a nigger.'
In Tim Wise's 'White Like Me' he tells a story of when in the 3rd grade he and two black male friends were playing football on the playground during recess. As he'd catch every throw that his two friends thew him he was caught off guard when they'd cheer 'My nigger' which he mistook to mean that they had accepted him as their friend. Perhaps so. But It would be years laters in his 20's that he'd realize what it had meant when his friends in 3rd grade called him 'my nigger'.
It represented one of the few times that these two young black males could 'turn the tide' and have a white boy 'be their nigger.' Because moments later when they would return to the classroom Tim's white priviledge would return him to a position of power. When I read this account in Wise's book at around 4am on Friday, 3 March I wanted to reach out and comfort him and as tears filled my eyes I said out loud "I know how it feels to be played for a nigger". And though I had admired his writing since the Fall 2001 when I first came across his Patriotism vs Pathology this particular passage as well as several others that I had read in 'White Like Me' would forever bond me with Wise. And if he were gay and should he and I were to ever meet he would be someone that I would certainly entertain the possibility of engaging in a relationship with.
I'd put the book down onto the endtable, wipe the tears from my eyes, and say 'Tim, I know how it feels to be played for a mutha fuckin' punk ass nigger."