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Chapter 15
Four Score and Three Hundred and Thirty Seven Days Ago...

Table of Contents

Days 416 & 417 - It's the weekend. It's gorgeous. I go out to Queens and barbeque. Ribs and corn. Yum. Oh, and I fall out of my hammock. I got a bump on the back of the noggin and was a little googly, but none the worse for wear.

Day 415 - My Dad called me last night with the name of another cabinet maker-- Little Wolf Cabinet Shop. Their website says they're open Monday thru Friday from 8am to 6pm. So, I get there at 8:30am and the door at the address that I have is locked. Of course. So, I start walking down the street to get to the Lexington Avenue line and there is another little sign that says "Little Wolf Cabinet Shop" and the door is open. So, I go in... "Hello?" Nothing. "Hellooo?!" Zip. "Hellooooooooooooooo?!!" And out comes a man! We talk about what I want and I show him the original, not going to be used, drawing. I figured let's compare apples and apples with Joy's cabinet guy. Well, of course the whole shop is on vacation for three weeks, but he is going to call me with a price some time next week. So, either they'll be cheaper or I'll know that Joy's cabinet maker isn't gouging me.

Day 414 - Thurs. - On my way to the subway to go down to Master Kitchen Supply, I stop at Dallek, an office furniture store. Obviously, they work on commission because, although I said I was just looking, Lou Pisani keeps following me around. Anyway, I'm thinking this might be the way to go, because I can get any length desk in a variety of widths, have channels and grommets put in and it seems reasonable (in the scheme of things). I thank Lou, take his card and tell him I'll be in touch. Then it's down to Chinatown to Master Kitchen Supply. Have I mentioned it's down there? Actually, it's part of the Chinatown sprawl, right next to Sammy's Roumanian. I walk in and Shirley recognizes me. She gets the brackets and the legs, measures the brackets, shows me the screw holes, then quickly measures the legs. They are just slightly more than 25 1/2 inches. I have had a bad feeling about the length I told her to make them from the very beginning. But Shirley said, the legs were adjustable, longer and shorter. I put the brackets into my knapsack and carry the legs in my hands-- they're not heavy at all. I get home and-- of course, the legs are too long-- they do adjust, but only longer than 25 1/2 inches, not shorter. So, I call Shirley and back I go to Master Kitchen Supply, and $15 and 15 minutes later, I am heading back uptown with my shortened, repolished legs. I asked her to take off half an inch. They took off slightly more, but since the legs are adjustable to be longer, they fit under the desk. Whew! I say legs, but actually, only one leg can be used. If I put the first leg in the position that I want it at the outside corner of the desk, I can't put the other one in the same place on the other side, because the floor moulding is there. So, the desk is cantilevered off the wall. It looks fine. Whatever. Since I haven't heard from her and I'm getting antsy, I call Joy to ask when they might be starting. She seems confused as to why I'm calling. The reason is, her assistant called and left a message for me at work. I wasn't there, so I didn't know she called to tell me they are starting on Tuesday! Tuesday the thirteenth. In Spain, Tuesday the thirteenth is bad luck for traveling and marrying. I don't know think there are any bad omens associated with restarting a renovation. But, we'll see, won't we? Mwah-ha-ha-ha!

Day 413 - I got a call from Shirley at Master Kitchen Supply-- my legs and brackets are ready! I'll pick them up tomorrow. Right before I leave the office, I see an e-mail from Joy. It's the estimate for the new wall unit. Yipes. The new wall unit price is a multiple of the old. Gaaack. Oh, but one good thing about the wall unit not being built by John's Masterbat... I mean, Master Carpenter is that apparently, the old plan done by Nevius (Architect No. 1, who is also missing in action. As is David, Architect No. 2. Is it any wonder things have gotten to this?). What was I saying? Oh, right, the original plan for the wall unit didn't take into consideration the actual space needed for the equipment, that is going to be put in there. The cabinets were drawn at 18 inches deep, but Lenny from Lyric Hi-Fi tells me he needs 21 inches of usable space for the equipment, air circulation and wires. Aren't you surprised at that piece of ass-backwards luck? Anyway, I am going to see if I can get another price somewhere.

Day 412 - Tuesday, July 6, 2004 - I call John, to see if he got and signed the General Release and to ask if he has a copy of the Electrical Permit (as we all know, he doesn't). He doesn't call me back. I call Pete from Murphco and leave a message. He doesn't call me back. He thinks I'm calling to see if he'll pay for the water damage. Actually, I would like to upgrade my thermostats to programmable ones and I want to see if his guys will put in the "dampness indicators." Either he calls me soon or I'll switch to Joys A/C guy. I call Tina from Service All Doors and Windows to go over the proposal. I leave a message. She calls me back! And I finally get a call back from Corrina at Apple Windows, but since I don't think they want to do the work, I don't think the work they did the first time was very good and I don't particularly like them, I don't return her call and I send my 50% deposit check to Tina. I call Joy to ask when (oh, when) are they going to start? She says, she hasn't had a chance to speak to anyone about timing, but she'll be in touch with everyone today and get back to me in a day or two. It's already been over a month since the first time Joy came over. I had hoped they would have started already, then once they start... Oh, I also called my insurance broker today. Over the weekend, I realized that without John there and Joy not in, yet, I have no insurance on the apartment. Great, just great. Anyway, the insurance agent for my health and disability insurance doesn't handle property insurance and the broker I had my old policy with, is on vacation. I leave a message for the person covering for her to call me back. She doesn't. Two things-- 1) no one is coming into my apartment until I get it insured, and 2) is it any wonder I can't sleep at night?

Days 409 - 411 - Happy July Fourth weekend, everybody! At least this year I'm independent again.

Day 408 - Nothing doing today. Everybody's going or gone for the long weekend.

Day 407 - Thursday, July 1, 2004 - Big day today! I am the proud owner of a brand new sofabed. Yes, they came at 9 o'clock, had no problem getting it into the building, up the stairs, into the apartment and then into the back bedroom. I took it for a little test drive. It's very comfy (to sit on, I didn't open it up and lie down..., yet). At about 10am, John, the intercom guy, came. The intercoms I ordered came with hand-drawn instructions, which don't actually say which wire is which (as the wires themselves are colored, but the drawing is numbered) and it doesn't say which way you're looking at it. (i.e., from the front or from the back). Anyway, John (a competent one), rewired the intercoms and got the front one (2A) working. And it buzzes whether you press 2A or 2D downstairs! The 2D intercom itself is rewired and would work, except there is something wrong with the set of wires it attaches to. Warren never tested the wires with any sort of intercom after he moved them from one place to another when the old kitchen was demolished. I'm not really sure what I'm going to do on this one. The intercom guy said the best way to do it is to run the wires from the front intercom to the back, but that would mean having to open up the brick wall in two places and run the wire through the dropped ceiling. I'll see what Joy and Yoshida say. Competent John is there for about two and a half hours and as he's leaving, Colin from the new window company comes and takes measurements for new glass and screens and gives me some options regarding how to make opening the kitchen window (over the counter) and those over radiators (where I can't get good leverage) easier to open. He will fax his information to his office and Tina will fax me something tomorrow. In half a day, three things were accomplished! That's more than sometimes happened in a month. I call Master Kitchen Supply, but my order isn't ready, yet. But, I go downtown anyway, to speak to Joel at Lighting by Gregory. I should have called there first, too, because although Joel was back on Monday or Tuesday, he was now on vacation until July 14th or 15th. How nice (for him). The afternoon wasn't a total loss, though. On the way downtown, there was aproblem on the B train, so I ended up getting off at 14th Street and going to the new Knoll location. They had some nice stuff and it's certainly set up for an office and office equipment (e.g., all the wires can be run through the legs and along a channel underneath the desk). So, with a full day behind me, I went home and sat on my new couch and watched TV. Unfortunately, in an un-airconditioned room, but it still made me happy.

Day 406 - Nothing much doing today. I call another window company that Joy recommended. Tina, from Service All Doors and Windows calls me back, then tries to get in touch with her measureman, but couldn't and will get back to me as soon as she can get someone over (either tomorrow or next week). I got my two hour window for the sofabed tomorrow-- 9:30am-11:30am. Hmm, we'll see. I don't think there's another Solomon scheduled for tomorrow, so I could be in luck.

Day 405 - I call Apple Windows. Corrina says, Bruce does the prices, she'll speak to him about it. Yeah, right. I want her to come right out and tell me they're not going to do it because it's more trouble than it's worth. I call Baldwin Hardware to get two screws for the plate on one of my front doors. Surprise, John lost them. The man tries to figure out which ones I need (John threw out the boxes) and is sending them to me. I call Mr. Steam to see about ordering another steamhead. I have two steamheads, but three pipes, so one doesn't have a steamhead. The nice customer service lady tells me the part number and the name and number of a parts distributor if I can't get the part through the store I originally bought it from (Kraft Hardware). In addition to asking about the part, I ask her a few questions, like how many pipes and steamheads are there normally? After some back and forth, there are just two and I should have just two-- one for the steam to comeout of and another for the water to drain out of. She has no idea what a third pipe could be for. My guess is the plumbers did something wrong. I will have Joy's plumber take a look and make sure it works properly. What I'm going to do with the extra pipe and hole in the wall, I don't know. I call Doug Engstrom, from AEngstrom Icynene Insulation (remember that?). About ten months ago we discussed refunding me some money. He never did. I really didn't look on my credit card statement and then I never got around to calling him. Until now. I spoke to his receptionist and told her the story. Doug was on his way out, but he knew exactly who I was and why I was calling. He's probably been waiting for my call since then. She called me back, they are sending me a check. John returns my call from yesterday. I called to ask him for a copy of the Electric Permit and to tell him I was sending him a General Release form to sign. He leaves a message saying he hasn't come in to the city much. He tells me Warren has to come and do something for the A/C. I really wasn't listening, so I'm not sure if it's to finally put a 220-volt outlet on the power for the back blower (that's why it doesn't work) or to install the "dampness indicators" on each unit (ha, ha, ha!-- it's a little late for that, don't you think?). Warren's not setting foot back into my apartment again. I don't bother to call John back.

Day 404 - Monday, June 28, 2004 - Not that you haven't realized it already, but here's just another example of my stellar luck with things with regards to my apartment. Last week I get a call from Sleepable Sofas, the delivery people for my Carlyle sofabed. The sofa is ready! The salesman had said, eight to ten weeks, and here it was, about four or five weeks and it was ready! I asked if there was any chance they could deliver it on Friday (last Friday, when I was going to be home anyway). Unfortunately, no, but any day next week. I make an appointment for it to be delivered on Thursday, when I'll be home for the intercom guy. I start thinking about it though, how nice it would be to get the sofa and how it would make me happy, and I'll be having dinner with my parents on Monday night and I could surprise them by having the sofa. So, I call and change it to Monday. On Friday I call to get my two hour delivery window. I ask for and get 8-10am and I'm told they usually deliver in the first hour. "Great!" I say. So, here it is Monday morning and I am happily awaiting my sofa. There's a parking spot right across the street that the truck can park in. If it ever comes... 8am, 8:30am... At 8:45am, Doris from Sleepable Sofas calls me and says, "the guy is downstairs and he says you're not home." I say, "I am home and I'm looking outside and I don't see a truck." I ask what apartment he's ringing and she says, "you're ate 145 Central Park South, right?" I say, no, West 82nd Street. She says, "oh, you're a delivery, not a service call. I have another Solomon, who is a service call (what are the freakin' odds?). Anyway, getting to the point for you all, I was the 11am-1pm delivery, the other Solomon was the 8-10 service call, she wasn't there between 8 and 10am and I wasn't waiting around until possibly 1 o'clock. So, I rescheduled it for Thursday, when I'll be home waiting for the intercom guy. As I had it originally. Joy e-mails me the estimate. Because the plumber couldn't come the last time (he was sick), the estimate only has the general Jorge stuff and electric on it. Other than the fact that the electric is by the day and they can't give me an estimate as to how many days it will take, it seems fair and I think once they get started, things will move quickly (still the optimist). Where was Joy when I was bidding the job?

Days 402 &403 - It's the weekend. It's nicer on Saturday than they said it would be and Sunday is beautiful, too.

Day 401- At 9am, Mike my buddy from Abbey Locksmith comes and I finally have new locks. They match my other door hardware and they aren't too high off the door on the common hallway side. Hopefully, they'll pass muster with the Co-op Board. At noon, Robert Smith (potential new decorator) comes over. As I mentioned, I didn't sleep very well last night and if you've been following along, you know what that means,... that's right, when I don't sleep, I'm on the verge of tears at all times and when someone is nice to me... well, that just makes it worse. So, Robert Smith comes in and is very nice and I told him my story (now with the electric problems included!), and then we walked through the apartment. I went through what I was going to have Joy and her crew take care of, and I think he was a little surprised that Joy was willing to come at this point in the job and do the work. Robert has heard of Joy in his circles and knows that she has done excellent high-end work ( I can't wait to see the proposal now). Robert and I go through the permit papers I have, we get some copies made and he leaves. He calls me later on to tell me that he spoke to an architect friend of his and well, I'll Reader's Digest it for you... He thinks I should listen to whatever Joy says. He thinks I'm overloaded with information and stress (really?). He has heard a good deal about Joy, all good and I should take her advice. She thinks I should let sleeping dogs lie on this electric stuff, so sleep they will. He also said he would be happy to work with me in some way, but thinks I have too much going on right now and should concentrate on getting the job done or at least up and going again. I think he thought I might have appeared a bit to "fragile" (being kind to myself) to deal with at the moment. I agreed, thanked him for looking into the electric problem for me and said I would call him. I'm sure he can't wait. In between meeting Robert and his phone call, I went downtown. First to Master Kitchen Supplies to figure out what exactly I ordered, paid for, and whether the island brackets were there. I called twice before, but Shirley, who said she would look it up and get back to me, never did. So, I went over there, met with Shirley, who after an initial period of not really trying to help, found all my invoices, and went through everything with me. Decorator No. 1, we'll call him the "Bailer" (formerly known as Robert), never brought the brackets back, or if he did, they put the additional screw holes in while he waited and he took them with him, and he never ordered the desk legs. So, I reordered the brackets and ordered the desk legs. They should be ready in about a week and a half. Then I went to Lighting by Gregory, to talk to someone about a replacement light for the one that exploded. They said they would replace it at no cost, but I'm not sure who the Bailer spoke to, if he spoke to anyone at all. I am told that if he spoke to anyone it would have been Joel, who is the owner or manager, but he is out of town until Monday or Tuesday. Well, at least I got the stainless taken care of. In the evening I speak to Pete from Murphco. I tell him about the water damage in the closet. He says, he'll speak to John. I tell him John is out of the picture and I have a new contractor. At first, he a little put out and I can tell he isn't going to budge. Basically, if John's gone-- "tough." Then I start to trash John and Pete joins in. I trash Warren a little, too and in the end, Pete tells me to find out how much the contractor is going to charge for fixing the closet. I think we bonded over our mutual dislike/disgust/annoyance/dissatisfaction with John. Hey, whatever it takes.

Day 400 - Thursday, June 24, 2004 - Where to begin... ? Joy came over with Jorge, the general Mr. Fix-It guy, who is going to do the carpentry, reframing, clean up, etc., and with Yoshida the electrician. We all began walking through together, but soon, I was with Yoshida in the kitchen where he was telling me, how, basically, the whole kitchen was in violation of code and we would have to remove the granite and put in new outlets, and, and, and... Joy looked over and saw the look of panic on my face, stopped what she was doing with Jorge and came over. Yoshida is a bit over the top (belt, suspenders, buttons, etc.) and doesn't want any violations being attributed to his license, so he wants to rip the place to shreds and redo it correctly. Joy said, let's wait and see what the inspector says,... if there are any violations, let Warren take care of them to pass inspection and then Yoshida would take it from there. The fact that I don�t have an outlet every two feet on my counters may not get me a violation, but the loose electrical wires running down the building to the A/C condensers are definitely a violation (not to mention dangerous). They are supposed to be enclosed in a conduit. So, whether or not there is an inspection, Yoshida is going to take care of that and get the back air conditioner working. Then an interesting thing happened. I showed Joy and Yoshida the form that I had just sent in to schedule and inspection. Yoshida took one quick look at it and without missing a beat said, �that�s the Permit Application.� That�s right, the application for a permit to DO the work. I don�t think Warren ever filed one before. So, here�s the problem, if Warren never got a permit, all of the electrical work done in the apartment was done illegally, and there will never be an inspection and the work will never be officially approved and the permit (which was never applied for) will never be closed out. This should really only be a problem when I go to sell the apartment. So, that settles it. I will die in the apartment (no time soon, I hope) and my estate will take care of it. This seems like a feasible solution, but it doesn't prevent me from waking up in a cold sweat at about 3am. Anyway, Joy and I talk about a couple of other things and they leave. Joy says she will get me the estimates next week and send the plan for the wall unit to her cabinet guy. Oh, one other thing happened while they were there. I opened the front bedroom closet, to show Joy where there was access through the closet to the wall unit. I notice there is a white film on the floor, then I notice there is a small puddle, I look on the wall and I see the telltale signs of water pouching behind latex paint. Yes, indeed, my air conditioner was leaking. I called Ed, who called Pete, and then called me back and said he was finishing a job in midtown and would come right over. He told me to turn the unit off (duh). Ed came over at about 6:30pm. He took off the access panel, looked around, touch some things and told me the secondary drip pan wasn't wet, so it wasn't the unit itself. He opened up the return in the bedroom, stuck his head in and found the problem. Apparently, there was a little tab that was inserted in the pump for shipping purposes, which needs to be removed upon installation in order for the pump to work. In fact the only thing written on this little tab is �remove.� It wasn�t and now I have water damage in my closet. Joy tells me to call Murphco and talk to them about paying for the repair. I call Pete. He doesn�t call me back.

Day 399 - Last night, I cleaned a small area of the front bathroom floor, so when I get up in the morning, I turned on the radiant heat and put the thermometer on the floor. I'm sure you'll be as shocked as I was to find out that it seems to work properly! I think it heats up in the appropriate places, warms up to about the programmed temperature and then shuts off. No, really.

Day 398 - Life without John is just fine. It's nice actually knowing no one is coming, rather than just assuming no one is coming. John's supposed to call today, but he doesn't. I don't hear from Warren either, so I doubt the A/C is working, but that's okay. I sent the new typed form that Warren dropped off over the weekend to the Department of Electricity. I used the pencil-scrawled envelope Warren gave me the first time. He had the nerve to put that the job started on June 20, 2004 and was finished June 27, 2004, and I honestly don't think it was a typo. Anyway, I changed it to June 20, 2003 and in many ways, when the electrical inspector comes, I hope there are violations that go on Warren's record and then I'll have Joy's electrician correct them. So far, no word on my new locks. I hear from Robert Smith. We make an appointment to meet on Friday. I'm still not sure what I'm going to do with him. Well, we'll see. I fax Joy my Punchlist, the plans for the wall unit and the monorail. We're going to meet with her electrician, plumber, etc., on Thursday. I stop for chinese food on my way home. Now, I'm faced with a dilemma: I want to clean my front bathroom toilet, actually, "want" is certainly not the right word. I need to, decided to, have to clean my front bathroom toilet. Yes, I'm finally biting the bullet. My dilemma now is, do I clean it first and risk losing my appetite, or clean it after I eat and risk losing my dinner? I decide to clean it first. I take the unattached toilet seat off, spray it with Simple Green concentrate and then hose it down in my unenclosed shower. I never understood why they didn't attach the seat. Until now. The Toto model that I got for the front bathroom (the "Carlyle") has a "skirt." The seat was supposed to be attached before the toilet was put inplace. Now, withour taking the toilet out, there is noway to have access to the place where the nuts (for the bolts of the seat) go. Well, this is the bathroom I want to have the Washlet, so I might as well just have them put that one in (right before they're leaving), then I can use the other, now clean, cigarette burn-less seat in the back bathroom. And it's just as well that John didn't put it in, since it would be all scratched and crapped up by now. I finish cleaning the toilet and, although, I want to burn the rags I used, I feel better about the bathroom and after washing up with industrial strength soap, I eat my chinese food-- ribs AND lo mein.

Day 397 - Monday, June 22, 2004 - My first business day without John (not that I would actually notice). It feels pretty good. The guy from Abbey Locksmith comes promptly at 8 o'clock in the morning (why doesn't everyone work this way?). He's brought new locks. Unfortunately, they are huge and will be raised off the door on the outside (hallway side) by about an inch. I'm sure the Board will make me change them. Mike, my new friend the locksmith, suggests another kind, which, of course, he doesn't have with him. I can get a Baldwin lock in the same color as my doorknobs. I opt for that. I speak to Ed from Murphco A/C. He's coming in about an hour and a half to two hours (he's coming from Staten Island--very convenient for me, if I need emergency service). I call Jefferson (who will be getting a very nice Christmas present from me), leave my extra set of keys with him and ask him to look in on my apartment while Ed is there. I call Joyce of Fordham Marble. She remembers me or fakes it really well. I tell her my story. She still has some of the Azul Astral and I wouldn't have to buy a whole slab. She tells me to get everything squared away and then someone will come to remeasure and do a template for the backsplash. I call Gold Protection Service, and set up an appointment for Stanley to come and take a look at my system. They are the intercom company the building uses and that's where I should have gone in the first place. I call Apple Windows and speak to Corrina. She will get the information from Sitting Bull and fax or e-mail it to me. I give her my e-mail address. I do not expect to ever hear from her. I think they are blowing me off. I think Charlton is, too. I never heard back from him either. I call and leave a message with Robert Smith (possible new decorator). I don't hear from him, either. I speak to Ed from Murphco and find out that the reason the back condenser isn't working is because of some electrical problem. He called Warren (see what I mean, I can't get rid of him), who said he would come and take care of it today or tomorrow. I'm not holding my breath and as long as the front A/C works, I'm okay. Ed has to come back to do something with the whistling in the front hallway. Eric from Popular Plumbing comes to pick up a check and give me a signed lien waiver. Two subs down, one to go (Murphco). I call Dana at Waterworks to tell her that taking everyone's advice and my sanity into account, I have decided that I am just going to clean and seal the tiles in the front bathroom and be done with it for now. In a year or two, I will see how I feel about it. She thinks it's a good idea. She says, nobody is going to notice it's badly done, except "you, me, Fred, your mother, Joy,... " Yeah. I ask what we should use to clean the blue glass tiles. She calls the tile company and they tell her, fine grit sandpaper and either denatured alcohol or something called, Goof Off. She thinks I should use Goof Off, for obvious reasons. Yes, how fitting.

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