With a loud bang and a flash of blue, green, and white pyro, the EWI Collision is on the air. The arena is packed with several thousand rabid wrestling fans, waving signs and banners and cheering as loud as they can throughout the impressive opening display. As the noise dies down and the smoke begins to clear, the face of play-by-play announcer Blake Underwood, who is at ringside to call the night's action, appears on the video screen and televisions across the continent.
Underwood: We are live, we are Elite Wrestling International, and we are about to see a Collision! Happy New Year everybody I'm Blake Underwood at ringside here on the final evening of 2001. It has been an exciting first few weeks here in EWI and the new year promises to be even more exciting with Gold Rush and the crowning of the first EWI champions right around the corner this Thursday night. Over the past few broadcasts we have been focusing on the world title tournament, which is now down to four contenders. Psychotic Sam, Seta Soujiro, Diamond King, and Twisted Steel will battle it out for the world championship on Thursday night, as those of you who have followed the tournament are well aware. Those same nights the fans in the arena have been treated to the first three series of round robin matches in the tag team championship tournament. Tonight, and at Gold Rush, we will bring you the final two rounds of that competition. The Cult tandem of Harbinger and The Destroyer are in the lead with an undefeated 3-0 record, but the competition behind them is neck and neck with The Pinnacles of Perfection, Acid and Richtor, and Ronin and Punisher all tied only one win behind. These are crucial matches for every team that would like to be recognized as the first EWI tag team champions. So crucial, in fact, that my normal broadcast partner Mr. Marvellous has forgone his announcing duties for the time being to return to his position as full time manager of Big Daddy Cash and Suicide King the Hollywood Dream. I have no idea who they are sending out to call the show with me, but....
Underwood was cut off by the sounds of Pantera's "Hostile" blaring through the arena. After a few seconds, Adam Kogler, the manager of Twisted Steel made his way down to the ring and took a seat at the announce table.
Kogler: How ya doing, Underdog? That's right pal, you've got the honor and
distinct pleasure of sitting next to a REAL commentator this time around! Let Tub O' Guts have his fun managing Dumb and Dumber, with my wrestling expertise and your blank expression, we're going to make one hell of a team!
Underwood: I never thought I'd find myself longing for Mr. Marvellous to be sitting in that chair telling his stories about winning the OWA world title. Let's just go to the opening match, our first of three tag team championship tournament matches as the bracket leaders, Harbinger and The Destroyer, take on the winless team of Hurricane and Twister.
EWI TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP TOURNAMENT MATCH
Harbinger & The Destroyer
~VS.~
Hurricane & Twister
*****
Hurricane and Twister were already waiting in the ring, looking determined to reverse their three match winning streak, as Seta Soujiro accompanied the Cult tag team to ringside. As Harbinger entered the ring to start the match Twister charged the feral man in an attempt to catch him off guard. Harbinger sidestepped him, though, and Twister bounced into the turnbuckle, where The Destroyer grabbed him and rammed his face against the buckle several times before releasing him. Twister staggered backwards, and Harbinger caught the big man from behind with a chop block to the back of the left knee, sending Twister down. Harbinger was right on him, grabbing the affected leg and ramming it repeatedly into the canvas before tagging in The Destroyer. The big man came in and set up Twister's leg on the middle rope, and jumped up into the air, crashing down on the leg with a sit-down splash. Destroyer grabbed his leg and pulled him out into the center of the ring and applied a figure-four leglock. Twister howled in agony as the massive Cult member applied the hold. The Destroyer finally released the hold, picked up Twister, and threw him into Hurricane's corner, with the MOD member collapsing in front of his tag team partner. Hurricane warily tagged in and locked up with The Destroyer. The Cult member got the advantage with a series of kneelifts that doubled Hurricane over, and followed with a quick DDT. As Hurricane lie face down on the mat, The Destroyer nailed a big splash to his back. Destroyer then tagged in Harbinger, who climbed to the top rope and came offwith a flying elbow to Hurricane's back. Harbinger then delivered a series of kneedrops to the small of his back before tagging in Destroyer once more. The big man quickly applied the Will Breaker and Hurricane surrendered just as quickly, as The Cult moved through the tournament with their unbeaten record intact.
Underwood: Another impressive win for Harbinger and Destroyer. The Cult is just steamrolling through this competition with an unbeaten record. With tonight's win they have clinched a spot in the tag team championship match coming up in a couple of weeks time. As for Hurricane and Twister, they remain without a win. This tournament has not been a strong showing for members of the MOD.
KOGLER: Have those two slobs even won a match in this little shindig yet? When you're on the same competitve level as Disco Pete and Hip Hoppin' Ron, it's time to start questioning your ability as a tag team!
Underwood: It has been a rough few weeks for those two men. They have the size. Some people question their dedication to the business, and after such a weak showing in this tournament, I think there might be some legitimacy to that argument. Coming up next we see two men looking for their first win here in EWI. Rukuss is coming off two very close defeats at the hands of Diamond King and Lucas Coleman while Kon Artis, still reeling from being upset a couple weeks ago by Mr. Beumont, is looking to redeem himself in a big way tonight.
Rukuss
~VS.~
Kon Artis
*****
"Bomb First" by Makavelli played over the loudspeakers, and the crowd rose to its feet in anticipation of the entrance of Rukuss. White fireworks went off in the entranceway, and throught them stepped the 7"4' monster from Criminal Nation. He walked to ringside, grabbed a microphone, and began to speak.
Rukuss: "Ladies, sweet, sweet ladies and gangstas all alike. I am representin' the illest group to have ever steped into this ring, Criminal Nation. Everyone watch, as I totally destroy this little newcomer. Don't eat anything yet, cuz it might get ugly!"
Just then the lights went out and red fireworks went off. Through the fireworks stepped Kon Artis, who was wearing a black bandanna, and Allen Iverson jersey, and black FUBU shorts. Not wanting to waste ay time, Kon Artis ran towards the ring, slid under the ropes, and went right after Rukuss, attempting a running clothesline. Rukuss was ready, though, and sidestepped the attack, delivering a big boot to Kon Artis' face as he turned around. Rukuss picked Kon Artis up, and sent him into the ropes. As he came off Rukuss delivered a back body drop. Kon Artis got up rather quickly, and began raining punches down on Rukuss, backing him into the ropes. Rukuss regained his whereabouts, however, and finally shrugged off the punches, grabbing Kon Artis by the throat. The big man lifted Kon Artis high into the air, and hit a chokeslam. Rukuss then turned to the crowd for their approval of what he had done, as Kon Artis slowly made his way to his feet. Rukuss picked the smaller man up in a gorilla press slam, walking to the ropes, signalling that he would throw Kon Artis to the outside. Kon Artis slipped out, though, and hit an impressive dropkick to Rukuss' face that sent him to the outside. Kon Artis followed quickly, grabbing Rukuss and throwing him into the steel ringpost. As Rukuss staggered from the blow, Kon Artis attempted to deliver the Hot Shot, but the big man sidestepped the attack and hit a powerslam through the announce table! Rukuss then quickly got back into the ring, and waited for Kon Artis to do the same. When he finally did, Rukuss grabbed him by the hair and picked him up. A by then severely hurt Kon Artis attempted a few punches to Rukuss' midsection, but the massive member of Criminal Nation was able to shrug them off. Rukuss simply grabbed Kon Artis' throat with both hands and delivered the Bomb First! From there Rukuss simply hooked Artis' leg and the ref counted the 1...2...3, giving Rukuss the win as ring crew workers rushed out and tried to replace the smashed announce table.
Underwood: An important win for the big man from Criminal Nation. Kon Artis just wasn't able to overcome the size difference in that match. Rukuss is huge!
KOGLER: Gee, that was a fair matchup. What did Rukuss outweigh that other chump by, like 500 pounds? And what's with both of the guys not being able to spell their names correctly? Who's in charge of the contracts around here? You've really got to get on the ball, Woody!
Underwood: That's not really my department, Adam. If it were, I would have found someone else to replace Marvellous in that seat you're in tonight. Speaking of my usual broadcast partner, his tag team is up next in an important tournament match. Both The Pinnacles of Perfection and Ronin and Punisher are tied in the tournament with two wins, and with only one more series of matches after tonight, whoever loses this next contest could find themselves out of the title picture at the conclusion of the round robin. A lot is at stake for both teams as we send you back up to the ring.
EWI TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP TOURNAMENT MATCH
The Pinnacles of Perfection
(Big Daddy Cash & Suicide King the Hollywood Dream)
~VS.~
Ronin & Punisher
*****
With Ronin & The Punisher already in the ring, the arena was enveloped in a red light as "Phenomenon" blared through the area, signaling the arrival of Mr. Marvellous and the Pinnacles of Perfection. Big Daddy Cash and The Hollywood Dream took turns flexing to the crowd before heading to the ring. As the bell rang, King and Cash had a brief discussion in their corner, before The Dream nodded and left the ring, leaving Big Daddy Cash to face Ronin. Big Daddy Cash made with the trash talk, but before Ronin could reply, Cash nailed Ronin with a right hand, then whipped him into the ropes and caught him with a knee to the gut. Ronin fell to the canvas, so Cash picked him up, only to hit him with an elbow to the back of his head, sending him to his knees. Cash delivered a boot to Ronin's chest to knock him all the way
down, then stood over him, slapping him across the face and yelling insults. Big Daddy Cash then headed over to the Punisher and flexed in front of him, then slapped him in the face to draw him into the ring. The referee restrained Punisher as Cash retreated, then Cash called The Dream into the ring. King and Cash picked Ronin off the mat, whipped him into the ropes, and
delivered a double clothesline, then Big Daddy Cash left the ring as the ref got Punisher out as well. The ref questioned The Pinnacles, who insisted that a tag was made. Suicide King picked up Ronin, whipped him into the ropes and threw a clothesline, but Ronin ducked and tagged in Punisher. Punisher stormed the ring, causing Dream to take cover in the ropes. While the referee kept Punisher at bay, Dream came out from between the ropes and poked Punisher in the eye with his thumb. Suicide King nailed Punisher with a few rights to the side of the head, then tossed him into the corner. The Dream stomped away at the midsection of Punisher, and as Punisher slowly dropped, Suicide King pressed his boot into the throat of his opponent. The Dream was pulled off by the ref, and then tagged in Cash. Cash went to work on the fallen Punisher, sending him into the ropes and dropping him with a powerslam. Cash went for the cover, and got a two count. As Mr. Marvellous argued with the referee, Cash held Punisher as Suicide King took some free shots. When the ref went over the admonish King, Cash locked Punisher in Big Daddy's Dreams as Mr. Marvellous grabbed Ronin's leg on the opposite side of
the ring to prevent him from breaking up the hold. When the ref turned around, he saw Punisher unconscious in the hold, and awarded the match to the Pinnacles of Perfection via submission.
KOGLER: Thank God that's over, I was starting to become transfixed by Marv's jiggling belly! Aren't you glad you have me out here instead? Smarter, more talented, and MUCH better looking! But I have to tell you, I know both Ronin and Punisher pretty well, and I expected much better from them against the Genius Twins, so I do have to give a little credit to the Pinnacles. But not much!
Underwood: Of course not, far be it for Adam Kogler to acknowledge talent in someone other than himself. The important news here is that the Pinnacles have won their third match in the tournament, and are now in control of their own destiny. If they win at Gold Rush, they're guaranteed a shot at becoming the first EWI tag team champs. As for Ronin and Punisher, not only will they have to win on Thursday but they'll need some help in other matches if they are to get that same opportunity. The team of Acid and Richtor can put themselves in the same position as Big Daddy Cash and Suicide King if they can duplicate the Pinnacles' feat and pull out a victory tonight. Their opposition, The Love Connection, stand in their way, looking for their first win of the tournament.
EWI TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP TOURNAMENT MATCH
Acid & Richtor
~VS.~
The Love Connection
(Disco Pete & Hip Hoppin' Ron)
with Ponch
*****
Despite being left alone by his tag team partner, Richtor came to the ring with a determined look on his face. He stood patiently in the ring, looking contemplative, awaiting his opponents. "It's Raining Men" came on over the loudspeakers as The Love Connection, led by Ponch, made their way to the ring. All three entered the ring and began dancing, which Richtor got fed up with right away. He attacked the three men, quickly throwing Ponch and Ron out of the ring before going after Pete, raining a series of forearm smashes to the man's back, before sending him into the ropes. As Pete came off, Richtor attempted to hit a Lou Thesz press, but Pete dodged it and hit Richtor with a big boot, just as Ron stumbled his way to his corner. Pete picked up Richtor and whipped him into the turnbuckles, following quickly with a running clothesline. Pete then picked Richtor up to hit a powerslam, but Richtor slid off and shoved Pete face-first into Ron's corner. Pete tagged in Ron, and he and Richtor traded several punches before Ron got the advantage, grabbing Richtor and hitting a side suplex followed quickly by a leg drop. He then got up and danced over Richtor before dropping an elbow. He stayed on him and asked the referee to make the count. Richtor kicked out, however, after the two count. Ron then tagged in Pete, who pulled Richtor over to the ropes and choked him across them, forcing the ref to step in and break the hold. Pete then dragged Richtor up and sent him into the ropes, hitting a back body drop. He then pulled Acid to Ron's corner and hit the Saturday Night Special, before taging in Ron, who went to the second rope and hit It's Raining Ron before quickly pinning Richtor for the three count. Pete, Ron and Ponch then strutted up the aisle, where they danced briefly before exiting.
Underwood: What the hell happened to Acid? Richtor was left out there against two big men all by himself, and despite putting up a good effort, he just didn't stand a chance. The Love Connection has won it's first match, and it looks like the team of Acid and Richtor could be finished.
KOGLER: I've seen it, and I still don't believe it! Here I thought Acid and Richtor were two decent up-and-coming talents, and now this. Acid disappears, and Richtor goes and loses to a John Travolta wannabe and a fat spandex-wearing freak! Oh man, I've got some advice for Richtor: Go home! Head back to that crummy bar in Nowhere, Texas and never come back, because that's exactly what I would do if I lost to those two clods!
Underwood: Perhaps that what Acid already did. I suppose this means that Richtor will be on his own come Gold Rush in the final series of the tournament, and that really is a shame. That was a team that had a ton of potential. I, for one, thought they were a sure thing to be in the championship match, but I guess this is what happens when one member of the team doesn't have his head on straight. Coming up next we have a showdown between two former MMP world champions. These two men were both eliminated in the first round of the EWI world title tournament and will be looking to re-establish themselves in this, the first high profile match for either man since their respective eliminations.
The Cult Master
~VS.~
The Regulator
*****
The Regulator stood waiting in the ring arguing with the referee as the long entrance procession of The Cult Master began. The delay made Reg impatient, and the self-proclaimed head referee of EWI turned his attention from the official and charged the procession. As Reg fought his way throught the Cult minions, The Cult Master stood up on his throne, which was being carried by other minions, and dove off onto Reg with a flying clothesline! The Cult Master picked Reg up, with a look of rage on his face after his procession had been interrupted, and delivered several European uppercuts before dragging Rag back to ringside. He threw Reg into the guardrail, and then whipped him onto the apron where Reg rolled into the ring. Cult Master followed quickly, but Reg was waiting on him. Onyx Cooper attempted a punch, but Cult Master easily sidestepped it and whipped him into the ropes. Reg came off and Cult Master floored him with a Lou Thesz press, and then began ramming Reg's head into the canvas. Cult Master then picked Reg up and hit a series of three rolling German suplexes, releasing him on the last one. Reg was slow getting to his feet, and when he finally did get up he walked right into Cult Master, who whipped him hard into the turnbuckle. As Reg stumbled out he was met with a kick to the midsection followed by a DDT. Cult Master looked down on his opponent smugly, but a hint of frustration started to shine through when Regulator just wouldn't stay down. A kick to the ribs shoved Reg down to the canvas once more and Cult Master locked on a camel clutch while screaming at his opponent for his lack of belief in the "God of the EWI". Once he felt he had made his point Cult Master released the hold and whipped Reg to the turnbuckle once more. This time Cult Master followed in with a running clothesline, crushing Reg in the corner. He then hoisted his smaller opponent up to the top turnbuckle, followed him up, and delivered the Final Prayer. Cult Master floated over non-chalantly into a cover and scored the easy three count. After the match The Cult Master re-ascended his throne and was escorted back to the dressing room by his minions, leaving Harbinger, The Destroyer, and Seta Soujiro at ringside. The trio then entered the ring in anticipation of the next match.
The Destroyer
~VS.~
Suicide King the Hollywood Dream
*****
The arena was covered by a red hue as "The Hollywood Dream" Suicide King
made his way out from the back. The Dream flexed for the crowd, then hurled a
few insults their way when the response was less than flattering. As the bell rang,
Suicide King was still posing in the corner and Destroyer seized the moment,
charging in and avalanching The Dream into the corner. With a disgusted look
on his face, Destroyer wrapped his arms around Suicide King's large waist and
hoisted him over with a German suplex, holding the bridge for a two count.
Both men got to their feet simultaneously. Suicide King attempted a
clothesline but Destroyer ducked, and hooks The Dream for another suplex.
This time, however, The Dream buried a knee into Destroyer's stomach, whipped him off the
ropes, and threw a clothesline that connected, sending Destroyer to the mat.
Destroyer was quick to get up, so Suicide King grabbed him by the head and waist and drove him into the mat with a piledriver. Rather than go for a cover, The Dream climbed up to the second turnbuckle and flexed for the crowd some more, laughing off their booing. This proved to be costly; as King hopped back down to the canvas, Destroyer delivered some hard blows, and in an impressive show of strength, lifted Suicide King up and over with a T-bone suplex. The Destroyer got on his opponent quickly, picking up The Dream and applying an abdominal stretch. In addition to the painful hold, Destroyer rained powerful punches down into Suicide King's rib cage. Just as it seemed The Dream may give it up, he used his free arm to desperately grab for the ropes, and although a smaller man may have failed, Suicide King was able to
barely grasp the top to his side, forcing a break. Destroyer sized up his opponent as the referee checked to see if The Dream was able to continue, then ran off the ropes and charged with a clothesline, but Suicide King dropped down. Destroyer instead plowed into the referee, sending him crashing to the canvas. When Destroyer turned back around, Suicide King connected with an elbow to the jaw, then grabbed Destroyer and tossed him through the ropes to the outside. The Dream followed after him, grabbing Destroyer's head and repeatedly slamming it off the announce table. The Dream then went for a whip into the ringpost, but Destroyer reversed, sending Suicide King face first into the steel. As he stumbled back, Destroyer grabbed him in a headlock and delivered a running bulldog across the steel steps, drawing a big reaction from the crowd. Destroyer looked into the ring and saw the referee beginning to come to on the canvas, so he rolled Suicide King back into the ring. Gazing down with a look of disdain, The Destroyer locked Suicide King in the Will Breaker - before he could fully lock in the hold, however, The Dream broke his arms free, hooked the top rope, and shifted his weight down onto The Destroyer! The referee groggily crawled over, and seeing only The Destroyer's pinned
shoulders, counted the 1 .. 2 .. 3 before Harbinger and Soujiro could run over to knock The Dream's arms off of the ropes. Suicide King quickly rolled out of the ring before The Cult could get their hands on him, victoriously flexing his muscles in between clutching his head and ribs. The Destroyer rose to his feet, and with Harbinger and Soujiro now in the ring, the three Cult members glared down the entranceway as the scene faded out.
As the final match fades out, the scene fades into a music video set to the tune of Metallica's "Nothing Else Matters". The clips are a compilation of highlights from throughout the world title tournament. After about a minute, a special sequence is shown. Diamond King knocks out Rukuss with the Spirit Breaker from the second rope. Psychotic Sam drives Big Daddy Cash down with the Psychotic Smash. Seta Soujiro wrenches back on The Joker's Child with the Walking Wounded. Twisted Steel's Dirty Deed finishes off Lucas Coleman. The faces of all four semi-finalists then appear simultaneously on the screen as a shadow of the EWI world title belt rises up from the middle of the screen. From there, another minute of clips entirely devoted to those same four men before the music fades out.
