Snippet 59

He found her in the Garden of Light.

She was almost always here. He supposed, hoped she found some measure of peace among the bright plants and paths flooded with rich sunlight.

"Jesca?" he said softly as he approached. It was best to announce his presence to keep from startling her. It had been worse before, in the beginning, even the soft whisper of leaves blowing in the cool breeze would make her jump. The years had calmed her if nothing else. Though he still didn't know if she'd ever grown to feel safe here. He wasn't certain he'd be able to if it had been him.

The young woman turned and offered a genuine smile. Her long black hair was pulled back fro her face and held in a loose tie, though she wore Jedi robes and was not a Knight. She was barely twenty years old, but had long ago lost the look of youth. More than just her eyes, though they held a certain knowledge not gained even among Jedi for several more years.

"Payter." She stepped up to him and into a hug, her head resting against his chest. He remembered a time, right after he'd found her when he was the only one she would allow to touch her. It was still much the same, no one else was allowed as close as he was.

Looping her arm through his, she led him along one of the paths. Her free hand fluttered and danced in the air beside her, not quite touching the leaves of the plants beside her. She didn't speak for some time, but the silence was nothing new between them.

"How have you been?" She still felt distant in the Force to him, as though she weren't entirely there. Maybe not so distant as last time, but that had never meant much; her presence had been wavering in the Force since he'd brought her back. He remembered sitting in the Infirmary next to her bedside, holding onto her hand as if that alone could keep her from joining the Force. As if his mere wish, his hope and presence could tie her to life.

There had been times since then when he'd wondered if he'd done the right thing. She certainly hadn't wanted to stay, and the life she had now was not the one he'd wanted for her, nor what she'd wanted for herself, he imagined.

She turned over bright eyes on him, a wisp of a smile touching her face. "I've been well. I like this Garden, and no one bothers me much anymore. Sometimes Adi comes to see me, but not so much for a while now." She looked to the bright sky. "I'll never be a Jedi."

The certainty with which she said it was chilling, but Payter stayed silent. He'd thought it had been a bad idea to hide the fact from her from the beginning; it had only been a matter of time until she figured it out on her own. He wondered briefly if Adi knew Jesca had come to the conclusion on her own. She needed to know what was happening, to have some control over her own life, not to have it run for her.

Jesca shook her head slowly. "But it's okay. I don't mind so much anymore." He could feel her presence in the Force pull back. "I did at first, but now I think I understand, and it's all right." She looked up at him, her gaze suddenly clear and Payter caught a glimpse of the girl she must have been before she was taken. She'd been missing for five years before he'd found her, before her case had been turned over to him because he had the best record of tracking them down. He'd never met the bright young padawan she'd been. Now he could only guess at what she'd been like.

They walked in silence for a while, Payter didn't think she had many visitors at all, let alone those who would let her stay silent. She didn't seem to want to be drawn out of the place she was in, and after two years he doubted than anyone would be able to reach her.

"I heard you'd taken a Padawan."

Payter looked at her in surprise.

She patted his arm. "It's quite the talk of the Temple, no one thought you would ever do it. I knew they were wrong though. You'll make a good master." Her eyes met his for a moment before looking away out over the Garden.

"His name is Kerge. I could bring him by to meet you, if you want."

She nodded slowly. "That would be nice. He's a very lucky boy. I--" she shook her head. "It doesn't matter. I think I'll rest now." She led him to a bench in the center of a circle of trees covered in sunlight. "It's warm here, I like this bench the best."

r Payter pulled her into another embrace, holding her tightly for just a moment. "That's fine. I have to meet with the Council. Rest, and I'll come see you again soon." He brushed a hand across her cheek as she sat before turning around and walking from the Garden.

Once outside the doors, Payter stopped and leaned against the wall, his head bowed.

***

"Can I have the top one?"

Qui-Gon sighed. "We've been over this, Obi-Wan. Slade is taking the top bunk when he comes here, you're going to stay in your bed. You have that unfortunate tendency to not stay there, and I don't think you would like it very much if you fell from the top bunk." Jes was already curled up in the center of the top bunk blinking at them sleepily. Apparently she approved of the newest perch for her amusement.

"Oh." A frown creased the boy's face as he stared at the beds. "Can we get Slade now?"

Qui-Gon walked from the room, trying not to trip over Obi-Wan who had taken to following him very closely wherever he went. "Slade's fine right now in the Infirmary. Kerge is keeping him company while Payter meets with the Council. We'll be able to pick him up later today." He didn't like leaving the boy in the Infirmary alone, but it had been necessary to set up everything in the apartment for Slade so he would feel comfortable while he stayed with them.

"What's going to happen to him?" Obi-Wan's voice was very soft and when Qui-Gon looked down, the frown was back on his padawan's face along with a crease of worry between his eyes. It was a look far too old for the boy.

"Do you want tea, Obi-Wan?" Qui-Gon turned in the direction of the kitchen.

"Um, okay."

As Qui-Gon prepared the tea and rummaged around the cabinets for mugs, he spoke over his shoulder. "I thought we should talk, and I find sometimes tea is a good way to start off a conversation." He glanced over his shoulder at Obi-Wan who nodded, even though he looked just a little confused.

Within moments, he set a steaming cup before Obi-Wan and set the dish of sweetener on the table between them. "Don't drink it yet, it's hot."

"Okay."

"You're pretty worried, huh?"

Obi-Wan hesitated before he nodded, looking into his tea.

"Maybe even a little scared?"

Another nod, this one more hesitant.

"You keep thinking about how if you had done something differently maybe none of this would have happened, if you'd been a little better, or a little faster, nothing would have happened to Slade." Obi-Wan bit his lip and nodded very slowly.\par \par Qui-Gon reached across the table and raised Obi-Wan's chin so the boy would look at him. "Obi-Wan, I want you to listen to me very carefully. It's perfectly normal to be thinking these things, we all are. We never want anything bad to happen to the people we care about and we always blame ourselves when something happens. But this is the important part, are you listening?" He waited for some acknowledgement from the boy before he continued.

"You did nothing wrong. Every part you played in this was the best you could, better than anyone should have expected of you. You have no blame in this. And Obi-Wan, I'm so proud of you for how well you did. I know it was hard, and scary, but you did an amazing job and I know that one day you'll be the best Knight this Order has to offer. Because you feel it here," Qui-Gon released his gentle hold on Obi-Wan's chin and tapped the boy's chest lightly. "That's what's important. All the classes you take over the next fifteen years will be important, but none of it means anything if you loose sight of that, if you forget that we do this because we want to help people."

Obi-Wan bit his lip. "Why did his master do that? Masters are supposed to help their padawans."

"I don't know, Obi-Wan. I wish I did, I wish I could explain or understand. I think Rian just wasn't ready and that things got out of his control before he could ask for help. He's not a bad person, Obi-Wan, but he did do some things that were wrong. And now it's our job to make sure Slade is okay."

"What's going to happen to him?"

Sitting back in his chair Qui-Gon sighed. He picked up a spoon and dumped some sweetener in his tea and took a careful sip. "You can drink yours now, Obi-Wan, its cool enough." He took another sip as he watched Obi-Wan measure far less of the sweetener into his own tea. "Right now, Slade is going to come live with us for a little while. He needs to be somewhere he feels safe and I think that this is one of those places. There are a lot of people here who want to make sure Slade is going to be all right. So he's going to talk to some people, probably Adi and a few others and they're going to help him." He sincerely hoped that they would be able to help. He didn't like what he'd seen of the boy's reaction in the infirmary.

"Who's going to be his master, though, now that Knight Rian is gone. He can't be without a master, he's a padawan."

And that was the key issue, Payter seemed to think that things were just beginning and that saving him didn't mean nearly as much as he thought. But he'd only been gone for a day at best. Still it would probably be a while before Slade felt comfortable with the idea of having a new master.

"Slade will find a new master when it's time. And there will be a lot of people who will make sure this time it's the master he's supposed to have." Qui-Gon took a breath and tried to remember the speech he'd given Obi-Wan. Unfortunately unlike his six-year-old padawan, Qui-Gon had been more than able to do something about the entire situation. He'd known something was wrong between Rian and Slade, but he hadn't done anything.

The chime to the door sounded, but before Qui-Gon could even stand, the door slid open and stalked across the apartment. He cast a glance in Obi-Wan's direction before jerking his head to the common room. Apparently whatever his friend had to say did not need to be shared with his padawan.

"Listen, I don't have much time. Kerge and I will be gone for a while, I'm not sure how long. I've spoken with the Council and have their clearance to go. I spoke with the kidnapper who survived and some very disturbing things have come to light. From what I can understand of this, Slade's capture wasn't an isolated incident, there's a connection between him and the others that have been taken over the past two years at least. It's big whatever it is, and someone is paying out a lot of credits to not only get Jedi kids, but keep the whole thing very, very quiet."

Payter blew out a breath. "I don't know why I didn't see the pattern earlier, but it's there." He shook his head. "Anyway, the point is, Kerge and I will be gone within the hour and I have no idea when we'll be back. I'm not letting this drop until I know what's going on. Keep an eye out for things here, I have a very nasty feeling that there's a connection here as well. You're the only one I trust with this, I haven't even told the Council all of my suspicions. Use your connections, see if you can't track down any information." His eyes darted back to Obi-Wan. "Look out for Slade, okay? He's going to need a lot right now, and I don't want him slipping through the cracks. He's a good kid, and he deserves so much better. I'll contact you when I can."

"Payter--"

His friend held up a hand. "I know. Don't worry. We'll be fine." Payter reached out and clasped his shoulder. "Be careful, I don't know what this is, but I know I don't like it. And I doubt anyone's going to be particularly happy about you poking around. Keep the padawan's safe." He checked his chrono. "I have to go, Kerge needs to pack and I have to post his absence to his teachers."

"Take care, my friend."

Payter paused and nodded to him seriously. "You too."

Qui-Gon watched the other man leave before turning back to the kitchen where Obi-Wan was watching him intently. "Payter and Kerge have to go away for a while," he began before Obi-Wan could ask. "They're going to try to find out why this happened to Slade."

"But he'll be alone." Obi-wan jumped out of his chair. "We have to go so he won't be alone."

"Who?" Qui-Gon reached out and placed a hand on Obi-Wan's shoulder to keep him from running to the door.\par \par "Slade! If Kerge is leaving then no one will be with Slade and he'll be scared." Obi-Wan tried to pull his way out of Qui-Gon's grasp.

"Okay, listen. There a lots of people who work in the Infirmary. Slade won't be alone, I can guarantee that Charr'a will be there to look out for him. We'll go soon, but first you need to put your boots on. We can go pick up Slade and get him settled, but you need to go to class this afternoon." He held up a finger when Obi-Wan opened his mouth. "Ah, we won't argue about this, will we? You haven't been in several days and I think you need to go today. It's only one class and you can call me if you have any problems, but it's harder to get back into it the longer you stay out." Qui-Gon had a feeling that this was far from over.

His padawan nodded reluctantly before heading off to the room he would be sharing in a very short while. Qui-Gon watched him go with a lingering concern. He wasn't entirely certain how they were all going to recover from this.

***

"Are you ready to get out of here, Slade?"

Slade looked up at him a slightly perturbed expression on his face. "Yes. I've been ready for days. Nothing's wrong with me." He spoke defensively, casting a glance at Charr'a.

"We just wanted to make sure, Slade. And now I can release you with a clear conscience that you won't be back here for a very long time. Right?" Charr'a smiled at him and helped him off the bed.

"I'll try."

Qui-Gon smiled suppressing his immediate response to Slade's words. Charr'a roller her eyes at him, obviously knowing what he was thinking.

"That's all I ask, no matter what small, old, green masters might have to say on the subject." She patted his shoulder. "Take good care of yourself and watch out for Qui-Gon, he has a tendency to get himself into trouble."

"Okay." Slade smiled at her weakly as he walked across the room to where Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan stood where he hesitated for a moment before tucking himself against Qui-Gon's side.

Qui-Gon exchanged a silent glance with Charr'a as he wrapped his free hand around Slade's shoulders. His other was already occupied in a death grip from Obi-Wan who hadn't wanted to let go of him since they'd left their apartment. "All right, guys, let's go get settled in." Qui-Gon turned and steered both boys from the room and out of the Infirmary quickly before someone decided that there was just one more test that had to be done before Slade could be released. He'd seen it happen before and had no desire for the boy to spend any more time here than necessary.

The boys were silent and clinging to him as they walked through the halls. As it was the middle of the day, many Jedi were out walking through the halls and while a few nodded greetings, none stopped to talk. The story of Slade's capture had spread quickly and everyone knew what a long road they would be traveling together before things were even close to normal again.

As soon as the door to their apartment closed, Obi-Wan released his hand and pulled Slade in the direction of his bedroom.

"Look, we get to share!" Qui-Gon followed the pair as Obi-Wan continued. "Look, I cleared out space so you can put your stuff here and you get to sleep on the top bunk because my Master thinks I'll fall out."

Slade stood in the center of the room looking around like he'd never seen it before. "I didn't, uh, you didn't have to go to all this trouble for me." The boy looked back at Qui-Gon.

Qui-Gon ran a hand over Slade's smooth head, the cool scales sliding under his fingers. "It's not any trouble at all. And now," he made a show of checking his chrono. "I think it's time for some small boy to go to class."

"But--"

"I believe we've had this conversation, Obi-Wan. Teacher Alenor is stopping by so you can walk there together, and he'll walk you back when the class is over." He'd had to call ahead to the teacher to arrange things because he didn't want to leave Slade alone in the apartment, nor did he think Obi-Wan would willingly walk to class by himself.

The door chimed. "And that would be your cue to say, 'Yes, Master' and go to class."

"Yes, Master." Obi-Wan sighed went out to the common room to answer the door. Qui-Gon was just a step behind him.

"Thank you, Alenor." He knew the Teacher through association with Bel-San and had always liked the other man. He was very good with the children.

"Not a problem, Qui-Gon. You ready to go, Obi-Wan?" He watched as his padawan and the Teacher left the apartment and turned back to find Slade. The boy hadn't followed him out into the common room so Qui-Gon went back to the room he would be sharing with Obi-Wan.

Slade was standing where they'd left him, staring at Jes. The small grey cat was huddled in a corner, her fur raised. She wasn't quite hissing at the boy, but she looked to be very, very close. Slade turned sad eyes on him.

"I don't think Jes likes me very much," he said with a sigh.

TBC