Hardly Accounted For
There was a fire on Sixteenth Street, in the house where
the bastard had lied through his teeth.
And had left to a basement full of ashtrays and cats, so she had an
abortion or something simple like that.
She smelled smoke as she walked from the liquor store, that had learned
her name in three days or four. The
house was just like wicker as the smoke got thick, with her boxes full of his
things where the kittens hid. A quick
count of heads showed no one to risk for; they turned the hoses on the roofs of
the houses next door. Running up the
street with a bad in her hands, she said, “I’m hardly accounted for….”
Gett Up
I’m down for whatever, I toured the worst and thought the
choice was forfeit. I’m down for
whatever. I’ll serve this world to
prove I…. I’m down for whatever will
get us up above me. One day I’ll spring
out of form into a new course, into the warmth of all the houses where you were
raised and we’ll hold our child, already saved forever away.
Without It
Both of us falling.
Breath like a secret, you held out of fear. Sweetheart, the lucky are tied to the ground. A wait – a time – alone – a doubt – a
thought – a weight – I wrote – a vow – a shred – of truth – a lie – of sorts –
without a word…. All over the summer,
all fists undone and now just white knuckles. Fingers swollen, the rings
wrapped around. And I swear to myself
that I’m finally gonna be fair. We
repeated-through twice jaded lips I do, I do, I do. I mislead you, but in my defense I’ve done it sincerely each
time. I’m scared, that in my defense, I
might need this more than you. I can’t
live without it. I can’t doubt at
all. I can’t live without it.
Mousetrap
She said, “You want out.” I said, “I know now, I know it, but it doesn’t make any
sense. I spread me all out, expose for
a freak. I have to be the petting-zoo
for the weak.” I guess it’s time that I
took control of things again. Try to
pack the privacy back inside. I guess
I’m facing up to the working kind, I hear there’s no applause for the pitiful
out there, but that’s not me; I think I’ve gotta have a myth to apply to the
lie. So I feel free to forge a fraud
that’ll play to the youth of the world.
And this charade is compliments of the mouse and the trap he made. He let me go; that’s the catch, cause I
couldn’t go away. She said, “That’s a
smile.” I said, “Keep it down, I know
it, but it doesn’t sell anything. Look
angry as hell, they clap when I fail.
It’s annoying but a glutton tries anything.” I don’t know if the real me wants to leave that trap at all;
bring it on mouse, let’s take this outside….
Divorcee
I used your empathy to make a brand new suit that I could
wrap around me and tailor confidence from my reticence, that I would be like
the Divorcee; reminded – you’re never gonna get a guarantee. Like the also-rans with their naked hands:
too wise for your optimism and naiveté.
You gave me your decency and chased behind the beaten, where we could
force forgiveness from news that loyalty was the bastard that reminded me that
I would be like the Divorcee’ reminded that you’re never gonna get a
guarantee. Like the also-rans with
their naked hands: too wise for your optimism and naiveté. Let me have yours.
Serotonin
I was still very young when the serotonin slowed a
settled, bilge at the bottom, ignored.
Are they listening yet? Are they
listening nowadays? This has been way
too long, and it’s still more than a hole just to patch with pharmacies. Get their kids all primed to seize every sputter
of release of synaptic commodities.
Aren’t they listening yet?
Aren’t they listening nowadays?
How much warmer are the parents of the newest brand of empty flavored
kids at all the concerts for the broken boys?
I don’t need this kid town flash anymore and I don’t need this kids town
flash anymore and I don’t need this kid town flash anymore. (I won’t leave without the light on, without
the light on)
Grandfather’s Left Side
Grandfather’s left side is weaker than yesterday. If you’d have called you’d have felt my
father’s silence. But you never stopped
to notice that the quiet things blindside and sting. This simple town has renewed all its confidence. The needle and drink have replaced
insecurity. Now our friends all are
working at dying and grandfather just wants to stand up. They cut out my rotting, but left the
disease. Medicine mocks curing. Syringe to reprieve. And now Grandfather will go now further, and
neither will any of us. And Grandmother
is broken…. My Father has broken…. Our bodies abandoning Grandfather’s left
side.
Cops
What if the lights are out, but both their eyes are open,
no longer touching, no struggle for sheets.
In two more hours, they’ll still both be freezing, but pride is the
winner. She finds he out-did her, he’s
no longer breathing. So what if the
cops were wrong? Silence is
fighting. Ten years are long enough;
ten years are plenty. New comfort
serves now as a confederate to make her confess. He needs to know. He
pries again angry. She cries again, “Maybe
its nothing I did.” So what if the cops
were wrong? Silence is fighting.
Kathleen
Jenny, raise Kathleen in the eyes of God; that way you’ll
take comfort when I fail her. ‘Cause
I’m not the kind to try to teach The Fella’s Word. Last week I mailed some cards I guess you couldn’t read. But the truth is I could use this
pressure…. Entertaining kids shooting
up at clubs is no way to spend the night I turn twenty-nine. So far we’ve made a whole lotta graves. And I don’t have the strength to dig all
those holes. But the truth is I could
use that pressure. Jenny, make sure
he’s keeping his vows; that way he’ll have something when he halls apart. I never seem to catch the three of you at
once from those pay phones I can’t hear shit on anyway. But the truth is he could use some
pressure…. And the lamb lies with the
lion I’ve learned for sure. But the
lion lies to the lamb every time.
Prying
I know it makes sense, but you can’t understand: I’m not
alone, but I’m lonely. How can the
months slip through homes with no words?
I’d ask how it feels, but that’s prying. Pack the ice on the hurt this chill heals, I’m not around when
you need me. And I’m trying.