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Following up on my last update, the Lord has made use of an opportunity to teach me how much I really must rely on Him.
For those of you who don't know, I am involved in small business with my best friend Scott. This business involves both a web site and comics, the artwork for both of which is my responsibility. Yesterday, I had set aside the day to work, hoping to accomplish much for the site. I had done many necessary chores the day before, including laundry and cleaning my room, so I would not be burdened with them during the day. I arose early, to give myself an early start. I studied the scriptures before I began, and prayed. Everything was going to go well.
At some point during that morning, my mother called down the hall for my brothers and I to complete a list of chores that she had posted on the refridgerator. I snarled something uncomplimentary under my breath and ignored her. I had done my chores the day before and was now busy working, and I was already having difficulty accomplishing anything noteworthy.
Several hours later, I finally gave up in frustration. I had finished nothing, and now it was late afternoon. I couldn't understand what had gone wrong. In the midst of my pleas for help, I was reminded of my anger toward my mother, and of the Lord's command that we must honor our parents if we are to prosper (Exo.20:12). I also remembered a definite impression, one that I had pushed out of mind while I was angry, that my anger was wrong and that I should obey my mother. I decided to go and to do what she had asked, and returned to my room afterward to find that my abilities had returned in part, such that I was now able to draw with much more skill than before.
This morning, I made a point to apologize to the Lord for my pride and to seek His will in humility. Even greater than last night, a series of images came to my mind, clearly showing me the illustrations that I will produce this week. I quickly sketched one in particular so that I would not forget it, and despite the lack of details and finishing work, it stands as perhaps the best drawing in this particular sketchbook to date. It took less than three minutes to produce.
So often, I forget that I am not as other people in this world. As one who has been blessed with the light of the Gospel in his life, I am held to a standard different than that of the world generally. The Lord will surely bless me, but I am responsible for living up to the light and knowledge which I have received in order to obtain those blessings. Such was impressed upon me in the first weeks of my return from the mission field, when I inquired of the Lord in the temple what I should do to obtain the blessings I would seek. The response came as I looked to the scriptures there: study the scriptures, pray, keep the Sabbath Day Holy. To this end, I have often looked to the words of Isaiah, chapter 58, verses 13-14:
If thou turn away thy foot from the sabbath, from doing thy pleasure on my holy day; and call the sabbath a delight, the holy of the Lord, honourable; and shalt honour him, not doing thine own ways, nor finding thine own pleasure, nor speaking thine own words: Then shalt thou delight thyself in the Lord; and I will cause thee to ride upon the high places of the earth, and feed thee with the heritage of Jacob thy father: for the mouth of the Lord hath spoken it.
I can only hope that I will truly take this lesson to heart and remember that the blessings of this world and in all things rest upon my obedience to the laws which the Lord has set forth as conditions for those blessings (D&C 130:20-21).
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