Disclaimer: Nope, I don't own any of these characters. I own
myself, though, but I'm not in it much. I don't own Ohtori Academy,
or the random museum they go to, or the bus...
Field Trip, Part One
Resulting from some bizarre twist of fate, the entire cast of
Revolutionary Girl Utena (minus a few here or there) somehow wound
up in the same class. Second period World Literature class, to be exact.
Unlike most bizarre occurances, however, this one was not Akio's
fault. Every member of the Seitokai, as well as a few who weren't,
found themselves in room 207-B before the second bell. Every member
except Nanami, that is, who liked to make an entrance, and Saionji,
who was always late anyway. A few seconds after the bell, the former
arrived, complete with her party of minions. Well, the female minions
were with her-- Suzuki and company where nowhere to be found. Thank Dios.
In one corner of the room, Miki sat, engrossed in an old leather-bound edition
with the words Alexandre Dumas's Greatest Works printed on the front.
Kozue knelt on a chair behind him, hanging over him. Not that
she was particularly interested in the book, she just knew
that her brother hated when people read over his shoulder.
Miki was currently wishing that he was D'Artagnan. Because of that,
Kozue was wishing that she was Constance, at least, until she read the last
couple of chapters, then she wanted to be Milady. When Miki had completely finished the book,
Kozue decided that the whole thing was stupid and she didn't want to
be anyone.
In the opposite corner, Mikage sat by himself, silently reading Restoration,
a book about the English period when King Charles II was in power. When he
came to the part about the great fire in London that finally snuffed out the
bubonic plague, Mikage shut the book. Recently, fire made him uncomfortable.
Near the window, Jury was sitting with a copy of the Bible in her hands
and heatedly trying to convince Shiori that all this "walking on water" stuff and the
business about wine and multiplying fish was a crock.
Utena, with Anthy dutifully by her side, was reading Tales of
Sherwood and was seriously debating whether King Richard's brother really
was a prince.
Suddenly, there was an explosion from the direction of the
kendo room. Moments later, a rather dazed-looking Saionji staggered in,
dressed in full kendo garb. A brown-haired girl of about the
same age, wearing an Ohtori Academy uniform, was clamped
onto his arm.
"It's okay, Saionji-san! You'll get it right next time!" She beamed up
at him. "The hand position for a simple fireball is hard to perfect, let alone
the one for the Dragon Slave!"
Saionji looked as if he was about to go supernova. "Touga. Get. Her. OFF ME."
Touga, who was sitting sitting and peacefully reading a copy of Don Juan, nodded and
stood. He strode over to a closet and pulled out a handsome, if whimpering,
lavender-haired man, who was wearing an extremely odd outfit with a big red R on the
front. Touga held him up by the collar. Before you could say "Make it double",
Katie had launched herself across the room in her best Wakaba-esque style
and was giving the startled (but happy for the attention) man an arms-and-legs squeezie
hug. Touga rolled his eyes and tossed the entire bundle of KatieJames back
into the closet. The red-haired bishounen shut the door with his foot
and went back to reading.
Saionji, still looking cross (what did you expect?), headed for the
men's room. He returned a few minutes later, impeccably dressed in
his Student Council uniform. Saionji scanned the room for Anthy. The first
person he saw, however, was her brother-- the last person he would expect
to find in World Literature class. He was sitting behind the teacher's
desk, reading.
"What are you doing here?" Saionji had a lot less respect for
Ohtori-sama than he let on, but it was a hell of a lot safer to
pretend otherwise.
Akio grumbled something about how substituting had not been part of
the deal, and went back to his book.
Nanami was sitting in a corner and giggling to herself, which is always a bad
sign. In her lap she held a rather shabby, humongous book. She was
reading it intently.
Some historians believe that the sights people saw in the middle
ages were actually hallucinations, brought on by a type of fungus
that grew on damp rye bread.
Nanami slammed the book together with a puff of dust
and whispered something to her henchgirls. They discreetly exited the room
(it's not like Akio was paying any attention to them) and returned
a few moments later with a large loaf of dark bread. Appearantly,
Miss Kiryuu had a secret underground network that enabled her to
get the rarest of objects at the most convenient times. Nanami snatched it
greedily, and began snickering some more. This time, she was not hoping to
play a nasty trick on Anthy and/or Utena,
but to impare her brother's mental capacities enough to... well... you
know Nanami. She armed herself with a tub of margarine and strode across the room
to where Touga was sitting.
"Onii-sama! I've baked you a loaf of bread, please try some!" She held the loaf out to Touga.
"Nanami... you cooked something?" Utena asked from across the room.
"Yeah, you wanna make something of it?" she snarled, then turned sweetly back
to her brother. Touga smiled condescendingly.
"Arigato." He took a butter knife from God-knows-where and cut a slice of
the bread, spreading margarine on it and taking a suitably dainty bite. It
tasted... strange...
"Well?" Nanami waited in what Touga thought was nervous anticipation.
"It's... very good..." She had worked so hard, he thought,
and he knew that she hardly ever cooked. Then he began to wonder if he was supposed to
be feeling this woozy.
Utena, gladly keeping out of anything that involved Nanami, went back
to reading her novel.
"Do you like that book, Utena-sama?" Anthy asked her.
Utena frowned at it. "Hai, it's all right. But this Prince John guy is
so unrealistic! You can't tell me that a real prince would act like
that!"
On the other side of the room, Akio snickered evilly.
* * *
Touga was beginning to act extremely strange. While Nanami rubbed her
hands together in glee, her brother strode confidently across the
room and sat down in an empty chair, next to Wakaba. It was then
that Nanami started to seriously doubt her most recent plot. At the
moment, Touga had draped his arm around Wakaba's shoulders and
looked as if he was trying to sniff her collar.
Wakaba was understandably confused.
The French play she was reading was beginning to get crumpled beyond
recognition as Wakaba's grip on it increased. It was no secret
that Wakaba held Touga in less than high regard, and it was certainly
no secret to the Playboy himself. Smiling seductively, Touga
swivelled around in his chair and leaned back to lay in Wakaba's
lap.
"Oh, yes, baby. You've lit the fire in my... fire..."
Wakaba's eyebrow twitched.
Utena had to use every bit of her self control to
restrain herself from going into hysterics.
Keiko, Aiko, and Yuuko had a very hard time holding
Nanami back.
In the corner, Mikage visably jumped.
Touga didn't notice any of this. He was too busy trying to figure
out how that had gone wrong. He then smiled as suavely as one can
when they're hanging over someone's lap. "Let me show you the
Ends of the Planetarium, baby." Touga frowned. "No, that's not it either."
Akio snickered. "That's what you think."
Touga brightened. "Come on, Onion Princess. Let's go find a nice, quiet
music room where we can get to know each other a little better."
The ensuing chaos was prevented for a moment by a high but
clearly masculine voice coming from the closet.
"Pok�ball, Pok�ball, who's got the Pok�ball?"
The contents of the closet giggled.
The entire room simultaniously sweatdropped, and turned it's
attention back to Touga. Wakaba took the presented
opportunity and dumped him onto the floor.
A knock came from the door, and Saionji (who was closest, having
watched the previous events from a safe distance) opened it to
reveal a small boy with a piece of paper in his hand.
"What do you want?" Saionji had never been a very polite person.
The boy, eyes giant after realizing who he was speaking
too, quiveringly held the paper up. Saionji took it and
shut the door. He scanned the paper and then dropped it on
Akio's desk. "'Sensei'. I suppose that would be you."
"Hai." The Dean gave Saionji one of his patented smug looks and picked the
note up. His expression quickly changed to one of slight irritance. Standing, Akio
cleared his throat. The clamour on the other side of the room ceased immediately.
"We are going on a field trip."
The students blinked. Utena looked around. "But this is middle- and high-school
class. We never go on field trips."
Akio looked less than happy. He didn't know how they had
ever pursuaded him to take over this class for the day, but as he
always said, a gentlemen
never went back on his word. Unless it was beneficiary to himself.
Akio continued, reading off the paper. "We are going on
a field trip to the museum."
"Which museum?" Miki asked, attempting to disentangle his sister
from himself.
Akio frowned, annoyed at being less in control that he was used to. "I
don't know. It just says 'the museum.' I would assume that it is
a... general museum." Tossing the paper back on his desk, he headed for
the door. "Everyone. Single file out to the bus."
Bus...? Utena and company looked at each other blankly. No one,
however, chose to argue with the deputy trustee chairman.
Before they could exit the room, another voice came from the closet (this
time decidedly female).
"Ow! What is that?"
"Oops, sorry. It's just my nail file."
Utena and Jury hesitated as the rest of the class began to leave.
"We shouldn't just leave them in there," Utena said.
Jury raised an eyebrow. "Why not?"
"Because it isn't nice! They'd be locked in the room. Who knows what time
we'll get back." Utena had gone into prince-mode and it would take
a miracle to get her out of it. And we all know how much stock Jury puts
in miracles, so, with an irritated sigh, she went over to the closet
and opened the door. A tangle of body parts in Ohtori and Team Rocket uniforms tumbled out
and sprawled on the floor. Katie grinned dizzily up at the girl
standing over her.
"Moshi moshi, Arisugawa-san!"
Jury frowned. "We're leaving."
"Okay!" Katie staggered to her feet with James in tow. "C'mon Jamesy, let's
go get a seat on the bus!"
***
As the students climbed the steps into the big yellow loser cruiser,
the complaint of schoolkids everywhere went up: "Why
can't we ever ride in a good bus?" Forcefully rejected from
sitting with Wakaba, Touga took a seat in the back next to Saionji,
who was beginning to wonder about his friend-- er... fellow
council member... acquaintance...? Oh, whatever. Soon enough, though, he
came to the conclusion that Nanami had something to do with it,
so he gave it no further thought.
Akio was about to sit down next to Utena, who was sitting in the
front, when a shriek erupted from the rear of the bus. Giving a martyred
sigh, he went to investigate. When he returned, the Dean found Anthy sitting
serenely where he had been only moments before. He dropped
Chu-Chu into her lap.
"It seems your 'friend' somehow found its way into Nanami's lunch
box."
"Arigato, onii-sama." Anthy smiled sweetly at him.
Her onii-sama, looking considerably less than pleased, hrmphed and
sat down in the seat behind them.
***
The ride to the museum was an interesting one. "I want to sit
next to the window, Micky!" Kozue cried, clamboring over
her brother (and looking as if she was having fun doing so).
Jury and Shiori sat together near the front, Jury looking extremely
happy and Shiori looking clueless as usual.
Mikage, in the very last seat (a single), clicked happily away
on his laptop.
Nanami sat in a seat by herself, her three lackeys in the seat
behind her. After all, she didn't have room for much else
what with her nail polish, eyeshadow, glitter gel, skin lotion,
hair care set, lunch box, Touga's
cell phone, three loaves of moldy bread, an extra set of clothing
just in case, and a large woven thing that some guy from
India told her would ward off animal attacks. You can never be
too careful.
Every so often, Saionji would grab Touga by the back of his fuku
and haul him out of Wakaba's seat.
Anthy had fallen asleep on Utena's shoulder and was snoring softly.
Utena smiled. "Isn't she sweet?" Akio lounged over the back
of her seat, smirking.
"Of course. She's my sister, isn't she?"
Utena looked up at him and blushed.
Katie sprinted down the path between the seats after a furry yellow
object, James close behind her. "Shoot! Pikachu, get back here!"
"No running on the bus," Akio ordered. Katie eeped in fear, made one last
grab at the Pok�mon, and toppled headfirst into
a seat. James tripped and sprawled on top of her.
"Pika-chu!"
"Sorry!"
On to Part Two
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