Solving Australia's Obesity Epidemic

Generations Y (born 1985 - 2000) and the young generation Z (people born from 2000 and up) are becoming fatter.  There has been an increase in today's youth AND adults consuming larger meals, more meals, and greater GI / Carbohydrate foods.  60% of American children are overweight. Only 15% of Australian children of the 1990's were overweight. Today Australia is closely equalling the US of A with 35% of today's children being overweight.  The ANU show that if trends are to continue, 140% of our children will be OBESE in the year 2009. This is a frightening thought: Image getting married, moving into a new home with your beloved, and having an obese child? Who likes Obese people? You all saw Deuce Bigalo: no-one wanted to do the Obese chick cause it's wrong.

The picture above shows an example of an overweight group of students. (The image is not distorted: they are really that fat) The combined weight of this group is over 3tonnes; which is the weight of a fucken huge African elephant. Having an increased amount of fat people in Australian society is a major detriment because :

• They change the traditional "Aussie" stereotype to obese, lazy, fat, porky, fugly people that just sit around and consume anything that APPEARS edible.
• Increase the need for high performance engines in public transport to cover the extreme workloads. Also super suspension systems and ultra brakes to cover the momentum from lots of fat people travelling at speeds over 50km/h
• Make normal people look like anorexic or balemic people - ALTHOUGH it does make beautiful people look fucken hot!

Today's government is seeking strategies to counter this obesity crisis by encouraging sport and physical activities which have been extremely unsuccessful.  Even the use of the "healthy" or "desirable" image that girls' magazines constantly portray are proving as foolish attempts.  I; El Frendez (being the superior in creative intellect than the combined brainpower of Australian parliament, CSIRO and the Australian National University) have devised a fool-proof-strategy to effectively solve the epidemic:

Consider the below hypothetical situation:

An OBESE person (such as the nice fellow to the left) goes to McDonald's Family Restaurant to eat a Large Big Mac Meal yes? The fat shit waddles his way to the counter and says:

 "A... umm. large.. uhh Big Mac meal.. uhh yeah. Sorry I'm just so FAt... uhhh I can barely.. uh Breathe.. uhh.. yeah.. Extra grease in that shit ok? .. uhhh.."

And the nice friendly customer service staff reply:

Think about it, we just STOP feeding the people wherever they go. You make it illegal to serve anything edible to people with a Body Mass Index over 30 (BMI is calculated by dividing your height in cm by the square of your weight in kg).  There you go! Kill the problem at its source. It's a simple plan if only those bureaucrats in the senate have enough balls to admit that they're all communists and pass this.

And while we're on the subject of eating stuff... here's a dude that eats other PEOPLE! holy shit!   

Hannibal: [creepily] Hello Clarice.. It's good to see you again.

NB: 84% of statistics are false.