--------------------------------------------------------------------------- WHOSE LINE IS IT ANYWAY? WLIIA Chat Games --------------------------------------------------------------------------- NARRATE --------------------------------------------------------------------------- Game: Narrate Players: _Daniel_, Mochrie Scene: Ordering fast food (Token Narrate music playing in the background) "HE WAS AS TALL AS A RED CEDAR, AND TWICE AS THICK. I HAD BEEN DRIVING DOWN THE ROAD THAT DAY, WHEN I HAD SUDDENLY HAD A CRAVING FOR A HAMBURGER. I THOUGHT I'D GO INTO THAT McDONALD'S OVER THERE. I STEPPED IN, AND THERE SAW THE MAN BEHIND THE COUNTER." <_Daniel_> MAY I HELP YOU? "I ASKED IF HE NEEDED HELP, BUT I KNEW HE DIDN'T. HE WASN'T A BUSINESS, 'I CAN RULE THE WORLD' TYPE OF MAN, MORE OF A CROSS BETWEEN A BLOATED HYENA AND A HORNY CHIMP. AND THRICE AS TASTY." YA, YOU COULD HELP ME. I'M IN NEED OF NOURISHMENT, AND I THOUGHT THAT, WELL, YOU, COULD HELP ME DECIDE WHAT TO ORDER. "I KNEW WHAT I WANTED TO ORDER, I JUST WANTED TO SEE HIM SQUIRM." <_Daniel_> WHY DON'T YOU GO OVER TO THE FRYER AND SEE WHAT'S COOKING? "HE SEEMED A BIT TOO CONFIDENT KNOWING HE WOULD MAKE A FIVE-YEAR-OLD KID VERY FULL ONE DAY. I DECIDED TO KEEP MY EYE ON HIM, BUT I COULDN'T BECAUSE IT WAS ON THE TABLE." FINE, I'LL GO OVER TO THE FRYER. "I WANDERED BACK BEHIND THE COUNTER TO THE FRYER. I FOUND IT ODD, SEEING AS THAT I DIDN'T WORK THERE, I'M JUST A CUSTOMER. BUT I WENT ALONG WITH HIM." HEY, WHAT'S IN THE FRYER? <_Daniel_> OH, NOTHING, JUST SOME FRENCH FRIES. "I WAS GOING TO PUSH HIM IN. I THOUGHT I COULD FRY HIM, TAKE THE ENCYCLOPEDIAS AND RUN. THEN I FORGOT, I WASN'T A SALESMAN." TAKE A COUPLE - THEY'RE...TASTY. "I REACHED INTO THE DEEP-FAT FRYER, AND GRABBED A FEW FRIES. IT WAS THEN I REALIZED THAT THE FRYER WAS IN FACT FILLED WITH DEEP FAT...A DIM BULB BRIGHTENED IN MY HEAD..." SAY, THIS IS REALLY HOT! YOU'RE NOT TRYING TO FRY ME, ARE YOU? <_Daniel_> "HE KNEW TOO MUCH. THERE WAS ONLY ONE OPTION." FORGET THIS EVER HAPPENED AND YOU'LL GET A TELETUBBIES HAPPY MEAL TOY! "IT WAS THEN I GLANCED AT THE TELETUBBY TOY THAT THE MAN HELD IN HIS HAND. IT LOOKED LIKE NOTHING I'D EVER SEEN BEFORE. ESPECIALLY SINCE I HAD NO IDEA WHAT A TELETUBBY IS. BUT IT INTRIGUED ME." YEAH, SURE, I'LL TAKE THAT TELETUBBY TOY. <_Daniel_> GOOD. NOW, WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO EAT? "I HAD JUST REALIZED HE WASN'T WEARING A SHIRT OR SHOES AND HAD A SQUID WRAPPED AROUND HIS WAIST. I WASN'T SUPPOSED TO SERVE HIM. IT'S AGAINST THE RULES. AND IF IT WEREN'T FOR THE RULES, THERE WOULD BE CHAOS, AND ANARCHY AND... OH, I'M BABBLING, AREN'T I? NEVER MIND." "ACTUALLY, THAT TELETUBBY TOY LOOKED MIGHTY TASTY TO ME." MIND IF I EAT THE TOY INSTEAD? I'LL PAY FOR IT. "I WAS BLUFFING, OF COURSE, I HAD NO MONEY." <_Daniel_> "I WAS TELEPATHIC AND COULD HEAR EVERYTHING HE WAS SAYING. HIS THOUGHTS WERE ANNOYING. IT GAVE ME A HEADACHE." YOU DON'T HAVE TO PAY ME ANYTHING. JUST STOP THINKING. "IN FACT, I HAVEN'T HAD A THOUGHT SINCE 1982. THE MERE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING A THOUGHT...OH WAIT, THAT'S A THOUGHT ISN'T IT? OR IS IT...WELL, IF I'M THINKING OF A THOUGHT WHEN I HAVEN'T HAD A THOUGHT FOR 16 YEARS, THAT MEANS ... MY HEAD HURTS." I'LL JUST TAKE THE TOY TO GO, PLEASE. <_Daniel_> "IT WAS ENOUGH. I DECIDED TO JUST FRY HIM." * _Daniel_ pushes Mochrie into the fryer. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------