---------------------------------------------------------------------------
                           WHOSE LINE IS IT ANYWAY?
                               WLIIA Chat Games
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
                              LET'S MAKE A DATE
----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Game:    Let's Make A Date
Players: Dean is the contestant, EstenC - cable guy, Merts - a vampire,
         Schroeder - Dean's nose, She-Ryan - Dean's father, Toksvig - Ernest
         Hemingway

<Dean>      DATE NUMBER 1, HOW WOULD YOU PAMPER ME?
<EstenC>    WELL, I'D PROBABLY TAKE YOU BACK TO MY PLACE AND WE COULD WATCH
            A ROMANTIC MOVIE.. OR A COMEDY... OR A SPORTS MATCH...
<Dean>      DATE NUMBER 2, IM AT HEART VERY SHY, TELL ME HOW U WOULD WIN MY
            CONFIDENCE?
<Merts>     I WOULD TELL YOU THAT YOU WERE VERY GOOD LOOKING, AND KISS YOU A
            LOT, ESPECIALLY ON THE NECK
<Dean>      SOUNDS NICE
<Dean>      DATE NUMBER 3, I LIKE A SPORTY DATE, DO U LIKE SPORTS?
<Schroeder> ANYTHING BUT BOXING...
<Schroeder> HORSE RACING IS PRETTY GOOD TOO...
<Dean>      DATE NUMBER 4, IF U MET A BEGGAR IN THE STREET, WOULD YOU GIVE
            HIM CASH?
<She-Ryan>  DEAN JOHN BEDFORD! WHAT THE HELL IS THE MEANING OF ALL THIS!? IS
            THIS BECAUSE I WOULDN'T BUY YOU THAT ANATOMICALLY CORRECT MY
            LITTLE PONY? WOULD I GIVE A BEGGAR CASH? YOU KNOW ME A LITTLE
            BETTER THAN THAT.....MY BOY, I THINK YOU NEED TO TALK TO
            SOMEONE...

<Merts>     LOL
<Dean>      Worth the wait!
<Toksvig>   Worth the wait, Ashley.
<She-Ryan>  Thanks guys! :)

<Dean>      DATE NUMBER 5, TELL ME ABOUT THE MOVIE THAT ALWAYS MAKES U CRY...
<Toksvig>   I NEVER CRY.  MEN DON'T CRY.  BUT, "THE OLD MAN AND THE SEA"
            MOVES ME.
<Dean>      INTERESTING. DATE NUMBER 1, TELL ME WHO IN HISTORY YOU WOULD
            MOST LIKE TO MEET.
<EstenC>    WELL THERE WAS AN INTERESTING MOVIE ON CHANNEL 73 THE OTHER
            NIGHT ABOUT ABRAHAM LINCOLN, THAT LOOKED INTERESTING. OR THE
            DOCUMENTARY ON CHANNEL 42 ABOUT ATTILA THE HUN, MADE HIM SOUND
            LIKE A FUN GUY.
<Dean>      DATE NUMBER 2 WHERE WD U TAKE ME FOR A ROMANTIC TIME?
<Merts>     MY FAVOURITE PLACE IS THE FUNERAL PARLOUR DOWN THE STREET...AT
            NIGHT -- JUST DON'T TAKE ME TO ANY ITALIAN RESTAURANTS
<Dean>      DATE NUMBER 3, I FIND SHARING A DESSERT VERY ROMANTIC. WHAT DO
            U FIND ROMANTIC?
<Schroeder> WELL, I JUST LOVE IT WHEN U TRIM HAIRS... WHAT REALLY GETS ME
            HOT IS WHEN U STICK YOUR FINGER UP ME... (so sorry)
<Dean>      DATE NUMBER 4, TELL ME ABOUT THE LAST BOOK U READ?
<She-Ryan>  LISTEN, I DID NOT SPEND 25,000 FREAKING DOLLARS ON PRIVATE
            SCHOOLS SO THAT YOU COULD COME OUT HERE LIKE A DAMN IDIOT CHILD
            AND ASK ME, OF ALL PEOPLE, ABOUT THE LAST BOOK I READ! I'M
            CALLING DR. SMITH ON MONDAY....
<Dean>      YOU'RE A FEISTY LITTLE THING AINT YA
<Dean>      DATE NUMBER 5, I ALWAYS THINK U CAN TELL A LOT ABT SOMEONE BY
            THEIR HOME, TELL ME ABT YR HOME
<Toksvig>   IT'S SMALL. HOT. THE BULLS RUN BY IT EVERY SPRING. I LEAP FROM
            THE WINDOW. JOIN IN THE RUNNING. THE RUNNING. THE SUN ALSO RISES
            BEHIND IT.
<Dean>      DATE NUMBER 1 IS A TV ADDICT!
<Dean>      DATE NUMBER 2 IS A VAMPIRE!

<She-Ryan>  Very good!
<Toksvig>   Well, yes Dean, but what's his quirk tonight.
<Dean>      What was Mark exactly?
<She-Ryan>  Cable guy.
<Merts>     To me, a cable guy is the guy who installs your cable. I guess
            that wasn't what the movie was, though...

<Dean>      DATE NUMBER 3 IS JUST KIRK PLAYING HIMSELF...
<Dean>      OK, KIRK IS A HORSE?
<She-Ryan>  EW! No!
<Dean>      HE'S A ... I GIVE UP!

<She-Ryan>  That makes his comment so wrong.....
<Toksvig>   Oh -- it wasn't THAT gross, Dean.
<Toksvig>   What can you see as "plain as"?
<She-Ryan>  Yeah, it's as plain as...the ____ on your face (?)

<Dean>      HES A DOG?
<She-Ryan>  WHAT?!

<Schroeder> I figure u'd stick your finger up your NOSE all the time.
<Merts>     ROTFL!
<Toksvig>   You have a dog on your face?
<She-Ryan>  As plain as the dog on your face.........

<Dean>      HE'S A NOSE?????

<Schroeder> I'm your nose! Sick minds in here people... sick sick minds...
<Merts>     A new proverb is born!
<Dean>      Sorry was scrolling back to reread Kirks comments...
<Dean>      Missed the face clue at first

* CliveMode gives Dean tons o' points for having a strange physiognomy.

<Dean>      DATE NUMBER 4 IS MY MOTHER
<She-Ryan>  SO CLOSE!

<Toksvig> Change genders.

<Dean>      NOT MY MOTHER? FATHER? SORRY IT SEEMED FEMININE TO ME!
<Dean>      DATE NUMBER 5 IS A HERMIT? A CAVEMAN? A COWBOY?

<Toksvig>   Ernest Hemingway.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Game:    Let's Make A Date
Players: PeterCook is the contestant, Colin - Ashley, Merts - An airline
         stewardess who thinks the plane is going down, She-Ryan - A nun,
         Toksvig - A cannibal

<PeterCook> DATE NUMBER ONE, WHERE WOULD U TAKE ME FOR A ROMANTIC EVENING?
<Colin>     WELL, I'D TAKE YOU OUT TO WAYNE GRETZKY'S ON TORONTO WHERE WE'D
            MEET UP WITH COLIN  ::SWOON::
<PeterCook> HAHA I THINK I KNOW ALREADY!
<PeterCook> DATE NUMBER 2, IF YOU HAD ME AT HOME FOR DINNER, WHAT FOOD WOULD
            U SERVE?
<Merts>     PROBABLY SOME UNDERCOOKED, TASTELESS PIECE OF MEAT AND MAYBE A
            PACKAGE OF PEANUTS - BUT I DON'T KNOW IF WE'LL MAKE IT HOME
<PeterCook> HMMM, OK, DATE NUMBER 3, WHAT SHOULD I DO FOR YOU TO GUARANTEE A
            HOT EVENING?

<dfw>       Oooo, I'd like to hear this one.
<Toksvig>   We're waiting, Ash.
<Merts>     But with Ashley, it's always worth the wait!

* Toksvig is just sooo impatient.

<She-Ryan>  WELL, I'M IN THE "HABIT" OF BEING HOT, SEEING AS I HAVE MANY
            LAYERS OF CLOTHES. AND I'M WELL COVERED UP, MY GENITALS BEING
            HIDDEN BENEATH LOTS OF BLACK ClOTH. PLUS I SLEEP WITH 100 OTHER
            WOMEN, SO THEY'LL BE NO HANKY PANKY WITH ME, NO SIR! BLESS YOU
            MY SON.
<PeterCook> DATE NUMBER 4, I CRIED AT OLD YELLER! WAHT MOVIES MAKE YOU CRY?
<Toksvig>   LORD OF THE FLIES.
<PeterCook> DATE NUMBER 1, HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE YOUR DREAM DATE?
<Colin>     WELL, HE'S TALL, CANADIAN, EVER SO SLIGHTLY BALD (WHICH ONLY MAKE
            HIM A TRILLION TIMES SEXIER) AND HE DOES A KILLER DINOSAUR
            ::SWOON::
<PeterCook> DATE NUMBER 2, I THINK U CAN TELL A LOT ABOUT SOMEONE FROM WHERE
            THEY LIVE, TELL ME ABOUT YOUR HOME?
<Merts>     I DON'T HAVE A HOME, I SPEND ALL MY TIME UP HERE, BUT I THINK YOU
            SHOULD REALLY PUT YOUR SEAT BELT ON NOW.
<PeterCook> DATE NUMBER 3, TELL ME ABOUT THE MUSIC THAT BRINGS BACK THE BEST
            MEMORIES FOR YOU?
<She-Ryan>  WELL, I ENJOYED THE SOUND TRACK TO "SISTER ACT" AND I'M QUITE
            FOND OF GREGORIAN CHANTS.
<PeterCook> DATE NUMBER 4, TELL ME WHO YOU WOULD LIKE TO SPEND A WEEK ON A
            DESERT ISLAND WITH MOST IN THE WORLD
<Toksvig>   PROBABLY SOMEONE, ER, LARGE.  MIKE MCSHANE. SOMEONE WHO WILL LAST
            MORE THAN A COUPLE OF DAYS.
<PeterCook> DATE NUMBER 1, TELL ME ABOUT YR HOBBIES
<Colin>     WELL, LIKE ASTRONOMY, BALDING CANADIAN MEN, CHATTING ONLINE,
            HAVING SEX WITH TONY SLATTERY AND WATCHING WHOSE LINE
<PeterCook> DATE NUMBER 2, GIVE ME ONE GOOD REASON WHY I SHOULD PICK U
<Merts>     BECAUSE I'M YOUR ONLY CHANCE OF SURVIVAL!
<PeterCook> DATE NUMBER 3, IF U WERE AN ANIMAL WHICH ANIMAL WOULD U BE?
<She-Ryan>  WELL, OF COURSE I COULD NOT BE AN ANIMAL, THEY DON'T HAVE SOULS
            YOU SEE. (that's not my thought, a guy I work with actually said
            that!)
<PeterCook> OK DATE 4, WHEN U DIE, WHAT WILL THEY WRITE ON YR EPITAPH?
<Toksvig>   LESS FILLING, TASTES GREAT.
<PeterCook> DATE NUMBER 1 IS ASHLEY
<PeterCook> DATE NUMBER 2 IS MY GUARDIAN ANGEL

<She-Ryan>  Yup!! ::SWOON:: what gave it away?

<PeterCook> DATE NUMBER 3 IS A NUN
<PeterCook> DATE NUMBER 4 IS A CANNIBAL
<PeterCook> DATE NUMBER 2 HMMMM
<PeterCook> DATE NUMBER 2 IS A BIRD?

<Toksvig>   Don't you like her lovely uniform and ghastly make-up, Dean?

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Game:    Let's Make A Date
Players: BhanaCont is the contestant, Ashdown - The Easter Bunny,
         Dr_Nick - Jerry Seinfeld, Mochrie - Thinks he's on a game show,
         PeteCook - Football player, SpudGirl - A call girl

<BhanaCont> OKAY.... WHERE DO YOU WANT TO TAKE ME ON OUR DATE?
<Ashdown>   WELL, I'D TAKE YOU TO A LARGE GRASSY FIELD WHERE WE COULD FROLIC
            BEFORE WE GO TO WORK!
<BhanaCont> WORK??? OKAY... BACHELOR #2, HOW FAR TO YOU EXPECT TO GO ON A
            FIRST DATE?
<Dr_Nick>   WHY DO THEY CALL IT A FIRST DATE?  I MEAN, ISN'T THE FIRST DATE
            JANUARY 1, 0000?  I MEAN REALLY.  AND ISN'T A DATE JUST A FRUIT
            ANYWAY?  WHAT'S UP WITH THAT?

<Mochrie>   LOL Nick!
<SpudGirl>  Heh!
<dfw>       Good Nick! :)
<Dr_Nick>   Thanks! :-)

<BhanaCont> OKAY........BACHELOR #3, WHAT WOULD YOU DO TO SHOW ME A GOOD
            TIME?
<Mochrie>   WELL, I'D TAKE YOU TO A PLACE WITH HUNDREDS OF OTHER PEOPLE,
            AND A MAN IN A BAD SUIT HOLDING A MICROPHONE.
<BhanaCont> ALRIGHTEE! BACHELOR #4, IF I WAS SOUP, WHAT WOULD YOU DUNK IN ME?
<PeteCook>  MY HELMET, OR MAYBE A SHOULDER PAD?

<Dr_Nick>   Good questions Siobhan!
<BhanaCont> I've pirated them from the show  :)
<Dr_Nick>   Heh heh!

<BhanaCont> LOL...  ALRIGHT.... UM... BACHELOR #5... JUST WOO ME, WOO ME
            PLEASE!!! :)
<SpudGirl>  YOU GOT THE GREEN, HONEY, I GOT THE STEAM. 
<BhanaCont> WHAT??????

<Dr_Nick>   Woo-hoo!
<dfw>       LOL!
<Mochrie>   Ha ha ha!
<PeteCook>  Haha!

<BhanaCont> OKAY....
<Dr_Nick>   IF YOU DON'T WANT BACHELOR #5, I'LL TAKE HER!

<SpudGirl>  LOL!

<BhanaCont> BACHELOR #1... UMMM... OKAY, YOU WOO ME TOO, PLEASE! :)
<Ashdown>   COME ON BABY, STUFF MY FLUFF!!
<BhanaCont> WHAT IN THE HELL??????

<Dr_Nick>   LOL!!
<Mochrie>   ROTFL!!!
<dfw>       Hehehe! That's horrible!
<Mochrie>   Oh that's so bad!!
<PeteCook>  LOL!
<dfw>       Shame shame! :)

<BhanaCont> BACHELOR #2... IF YOU HAD 2 DAYS TO LIVE, HOW WOULD YOU SPEND IT?
<Dr_Nick>   WELL I CERTAINLY WOULDN'T SPEND IT DOING THINGS LIKE SHOPPING OR
            LAUNDRY, THAT'S FOR SURE.  SPEAKING OF LAUNDRY, YOU EVER SEE
            THOSE TIDE COMMERCIALS WHERE IT SHOWS HOW IT REMOVES STAINS LIKE
            GRASS OR BLOOD.  BUDDY, IF YOU'VE GOT THAT MUCH BLOOD ON YOUR
            SHIRT, MAYBE LAUNDRY ISN'T YOUR FIRST CONCERN.

<Mochrie>   ROTFL!
<Ashdown>   LOL!
<Sharilyn>  LOL!
<PeteCook>  Haha! Too much!

<BhanaCont> UMMM... OKAY! BACHELOR #3, WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF YOU WON A MILLION
            DOLLARS?
<Mochrie>   WELL, SPENDING IT WOULDN'T BE AS MUCH FUN AS EARNING IT MYSELF!
            COULD I BUY A VOWEL, PLEASE?

<SpudGirl>  Heh heh heh!

<BhanaCont> ALRIGHTEE!!! BACHELOR #4, WHAT'S THE MOST ROMANTIC THING YOU'VE
            EVER DONE FOR A LADY?
<PeteCook>  WELL ONCE I PICKED UP A CHEERLEADER AND TOLD HER SHE HAD GREAT
            POM-POMS. THEN THINGS GOT HOT I CAN TELL YOU! HOO BOY!

<Dr_Nick>   LOL!
<dfw>       LOL!
<Mochrie>   Ewwww!
<Ashdown>   ROTFL!!

<BhanaCont> LOL... ALRIGHT... BACHELOR #5, WHERE DO YOU PICTURE YOURSELF IN
            10 YEARS?
<PeteCook>  ONE HOT DAME!
<BhanaCont> SHUT UP! :-P
<SpudGirl>  OOOH, HONEY, IF YOU PUT ME UP IN A NICE APARTMENT, BUT MY FURS,
            PAY MY UTILITIES, I CAN STILL BE ALL YOURS...BE MY RICHARD GERE,
            SWEET THING!

<dfw>       Hehe...hint hint!
<PeteCook>  OK, guess time Siobhan!

<BhanaCont> ALRIGHT! BACHELOR #2 IS JERRY SEINFELD?

<PeteCook>  Yay!
<Mochrie>   Wow!
<PeteCook>  Woohoo!
<Ashdown>   Great!!

<BhanaCont> BACHELOR #3 IS A GAME SHOW (WHEEL OF FORTUNE?) CONTESTANT? MAYBE?

<Mochrie>   Yup!!
<PeteCook>  Woohoo again!
<Mochrie>   Good one!
<Ashdown>   Way to go!

<BhanaCont> BACHELOR #4 IS A FOOTBALL PLAYER?

<PeteCook>  Hehe!
<Dr_Nick>   Great!
<SpudGirl>  *applause*
<PeteCook>  Woohoo again!

<BhanaCont> BACHELOR #5 IS A HOOKER?

<Mochrie>   Sha-wing!
<SpudGirl>  That would be me! Heh heh heh!
<Dr_Nick>   Yeah, but what is she pretending to be?
<PeteCook>  Amazing!
<Mochrie>   Oh Nick!

<BhanaCont> BACHELOR #1 IS... I HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO CLUE!!!

<Mochrie>   Stuff my fluff! Come on!!!
<Dr_Nick>   Ooohh! Or OoooOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooohh!!!

<BhanaCont> TONY?

<Dr_Nick>   I love stuff my fluff!
<PeteCook>  You'll feel like a bunny when u hear
<SpudGirl>  Get the yolk, bhana?
<Mochrie>   Hahaha!

<BhanaCont> EASTER BUNNY???

<Mochrie>   Yes!
<Dr_Nick>   Yay!
<SpudGirl>  Wahoo!!
<Ashdown>   Yep!

<BhanaCont> YA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Game:    Let's Make A Date
Players: Mochrie is the contestant, EstenC - A bad Shakespearean actor,
         JLawrence - a drill sergeant, JonPryce - Death taking Mochrie to
         Hades, MrsTony - Tony making a return to WLiiA?, Sharilyn - Ginger
         Spice, Stiles - A golf pro

<Mochrie>   HI THERE, BACHELOR NUMBER ONE. I HEART FOOD! DESCRIBE FOR ME THE
            PLACE YOU'D TAKE ME FOR DINNER!
<EstenC>    I WOULD TAKE THEE TO A PLACE OF CHICKEN DINNERS.
<Mochrie>   OH, THAT SOUNDS FANTASTIC! BACHELOR NUMBER TWO! SAME QUESTION.
<JLawrence> WELL I WOULD MAKE YOU EAT IN 15 MINUTES, THEN MOVE, MOVE,
            MOVE!!!!!!!!

<JonPryce>  Hehehe!
<JoeIsham>  Haha!
<cordova-r> *giggle*

<Mochrie>   BACHELOR NUMBER THREE. I LOVE WORLD TRAVEL! WHERE IS THE MOST
            EXCITING SPOT WE COULD GO?
<JonPryce>  MOST EXCITING SPOT? WELL, AFTER YOUR CROSS THE RIVER, I'M AFRAID
            IT'S MOSTLY ROCK AND MIST. OH, AND BY THE WAY, TELL OFF YOUR BOSS
            WHILE YOU CAN. YOU'VE ONLY GOT 15 MINUTES.
<Mochrie>   UH, OKAY. I THINK I WILL...BACHELOR NUMBER FOUR...GIVE ME YOUR
            DEFINITION OF TRUE LOVE.
<MrsTony>   I USED TO THINK IT WAS LOOKING IN A MIRROR, BUT NOT ANYMORE.

* Mochrie is totally clueless!

<Mochrie>   WOW! I DIG PHILOSOPHY! BACHELOR NUMBER FIVE -- DESCRIBE A FANTASY
            DATE FOR TOI ET MOI...
<Sharilyn>  WELL, I HAVE A LOT OF MONEY RIGHT NOW, SO WE COULD GO SHOPPING TO
            START. MAYBE FOR SHOES. BUT NOT PLATFORM SNEAKERS! ANYTHING BUT
            THOSE! AND LATER WE COULD GO TO A CLUB. BUT NOT A DANCE CLUB.
            I'M MORE INTO ROCK NOW, SINCE THOSE BITCHES......

<Stiles>    LOL!
<JLawrence> ROTFL!!!

<Mochrie>   WOW! GROOVY! BACHELOR NUMBER SIX (WHEW!) IF YOU WERE AN INVENTOR,
            WHAT WOULD YOU INVENT?
<Stiles>    I CAN'T TELL YOU THE NAME, BUT IT WOULD GO 400 YARDS AND STRAIGHT
            TOO!

<JLawrence> Haha!
<cordova-r> Ha, ha, ha!

<Mochrie>   UH HUH...BACHELOR NUMBER ONE AGAIN! WOO ME! WOO ME PLEASE!!
<EstenC>    WELL, PERHAPS YOU COULD SUP FROM THE BOSOM OF A KNIGHT, THEN
            PERCHANCE WE COULD STAND ON THE BATTLEMENTS AND ... DO SOMETHING.

<MrsTony>   LOL!
<JLawrence> LOL!

<Mochrie>   HMMM...MAYBE LATER...BACHELOR NUMBER TWO, YOU WOO ME TOO PLEASE!
<JLawrence> GET DOWN NOW!!!! I WANT TWENTY, THEN WE WILL GO ALL NIGHT!!!!!!!

<Stiles>    LOL!
<JonPryce>  ROTFL!!
<MrsTony>   FROTFL!
<cordova-r> Whoo hoo!!
<EstenC>    :)

<Mochrie>   OOH! YOU'RE A FRISKY LITTLE DEVIL, AREN'T YOU! BACHELOR NUMBER
            THREE, HOW WOULD YOU PROPOSE TO ME?
<JonPryce>  SINCE YOU'RE DOOMED, WHY NOT?

<Stiles>    LOL!
<cordova-r> :o)

<Mochrie>   HMMM...LUCKY ME...SAME QUESTION TO NUMBER FOUR.
<MrsTony>   I WOULD GO DOWN ON BENDED KNEE, WEARING LOOSE TROUSERS SO NOTHING
            UNFORTUNATE HAPPENS AND I WOULD MANAGE TO INSULT CLIVE AT THE
            SAME TIME...

<JLawrence> ROTFL!!!
<Sharilyn>  LOL!
<cordova-r> LOL!

<Mochrie>   THAT'S COOL. AND NUMBER FIVE -- WHO DO YOU IDOLIZE? DO YOU HAVE
            A HERO?
<Sharilyn>  I USED TO, BUT SHE STABBED ME IN THE BACK. SCARY MY ASS.
<Mochrie>   BACHELOR NUMBER SIX...WHO'S YOUR HERO?
<Stiles>    JACK NICKLAUS, MAN THAT GUY'S BUTCH.

<Mochrie>   :) Well, here goes nothin'...

<Mochrie>   NUMBER ONE IS KING ARTHUR?

<EstenC>    Close...

<Mochrie>   ROBIN HOOD?
<EstenC>    F I WERE BUT  AKING I WOULD BE ARTHU.
<Mochrie>   ?????

<EstenC>    Bad shakespearian actor...
<Mochrie>   Ah! Ha Ha!

<Mochrie>   NUMBER TWO IS A DRILL SARGEANT?

<JLawrence> Yayyyyyyy!!!!
<cordova-r> Yay!!!

<Mochrie>   NUMBER THREE IS THE ANGEL OF DEATH?

<Stiles>    :):):):):):):):)
<JonPryce>  Close enough!
<Mochrie>   What was it?
<JonPryce>  "Death Taking You to Hades"
<Mochrie>   Ahhh...

<Mochrie>   AND NUMBER FOUR IS GREG PROOPS?

<Stiles>    LOL!
<MrsTony>   Guess Again!
<Sharilyn>  So close!

<Mochrie>   DREW CAREY?

<JonPryce>  Very close!
<MrsTony>   IS my hair alright?
          
<Mochrie>   CLIVE?

<MrsTony>   Guess again.......
<Sharilyn>  LOL!
<Stiles>    It's all in a name...
<JonPryce>  So near, yet so far.
<Mochrie>   Hmmmm...
<MrsTony>   Should I tell him?
<JLawrence> It smells like Haddock!!!!

<Mochrie>   YOU ARE TONY SLATTERY!

<MrsTony>   Yes!
<Stiles>    :D great!
<MrsTony>   I am Tony making my return to WLiiA!
<JonPryce>  Tony Deklan Patricious Xerxes Slattery, that is!
<Stiles>    Only...god knows how many tries!

<Mochrie>   NUMBER FIVE IS MY EX-HUSBAND?
<Sharilyn>  LOL...no, go back, think harder!
<Mochrie>   Hmmm....difficult one, this!
<Sharilyn>  I thought I made it so obvious!
<JLawrence> Yeah.......
<JonPryce>  Just ignore my ramblings Emile, I'm confusing you :)
<cordova-r> Shall we give him a hint?
<Mochrie>   Please....
<Sharilyn>  No! <evil grin>
<Mochrie>   <sulks>
<MrsTony>   Just tell him what you want, what you really really want...

<Mochrie>   NUMBER FIVE IS POSH SPICE!

<Sharilyn>  Closer...
<JonPryce>  Nope...
<Stiles>    Oooh so close!

<Mochrie>   SPORTY SPICE?

<Stiles>    Keep going
<Sharilyn>  THINK!!!!
<JLawrence> Closer!

<Mochrie>   OLD SPICE? CILANTRO?

<Stiles>    You lost it!
<JLawrence> Cilantro????????
<Mochrie>   Which one is she?!!

* Sharilyn presses her buzzer. Ginger.

<Mochrie>   D'OH! GINGER!!!!
<Sharilyn>  Y'know, all bitter and stuff. Doesn't wanna see another platform
            sneaker.
<MrsTony>   One more...

* Sharilyn pats Emile on the back

<Mochrie>   AND NUMBER SIX IS...A PRO GOLFER?

<Stiles>    Yes! No prob!

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Game:    Let's Make A Date
Players: JLawrence is the contestant, JonPryce - Cult initiate who thinks
         contestant is the head cult-guy, Mochrie - A disco king,
         MrsTony - A paranoid schizophrenic, Werd - A lonely person in an
         old age home

<JLawrence> OK.  CONTESTANT NUMBER ONE. WHAT IS YOUR IDEA OF A PERFECT DATE??
<JonPryce>  WHATEVER IS FINE WITH YOU, ALMIGHTY MASTER. WE WOULD SIT ON A
            HILL BY THE BEACH AND WAIT FOR THE HALLE-BOPP COMET TO TAKE US.

<Mochrie>   LOL!

<JLawrence> CONTESTANT NUMBER 2.  WHO IS YOUR HERO?
<Mochrie>   OH, I HAVE SO MANY HEROES, I CAN'T PICK ONE! THERE ARE TOO MANY
            PEOPLE WHO PUT THE THUMP, THUMP, THUMP INTO MY TINY LITTLE
            UNIVERSE...

<Werd>      One question: should we make the clues painfully obvious or sorta
            hard?
<MrsTony>   I vote for sorta hard!
<JLawrence> Yeah! I like it hard!
<Werd>      Hehe!
<JLawrence> Did I say that?????

* MrsTony giggles

<Mochrie>   "Are you still talking about your face?" ;-)
<JonPryce>  There's a good line for "Whose Line", Angie!
<JLawrence> Hehe!

<JLawrence> NUMBER 3. WOO ME!
<MrsTony>   WHY? WHY WOULD WANT ME TO DO THAT?  ARE YOU FOLLOWING ME?

<Werd>      LOL!

<JLawrence> PICKY PICKY! IF YOU WERE A FOOD WHAT WOULD YOU BE?
<Werd>      A PICKLE.

<JLawrence> Huh? Hehe!
<JonPryce>  You wanted it hard Angie!
<Mochrie>   LOL!

<JLawrence> #1.  WHAT DO YOU DO FOR HOBBIES?
<JonPryce>  WELL, I LIKE TO WORK THE ROYAL FIELDS... I PREPARE FOR MY
            CIRMUCISION... AND I CHANT.
<JLawrence> #2.  IF WE WERE TO GO AWAY, WHERE WOULD YOU TAKE ME?
<Mochrie>   OH, I KNOW THIS LITTLE PLACE CALLED FUNKY TOWN. A PLACE WITH
            BRIGHT LIGHTS AND SMOKE AND MIRRORS. WE COULD DANCE AND HOLD
            HANDS, AND THEN MAYBE AFTERWARDS GO IN THE BUSH, BUSH...CAUSE
            THAT'S THE WAY I LIKE IT, UH-HUH UH-HUH!
<JLawrence> OK! #3. WHAT ARE YOUR HOBBIES?
<MrsTony>   YOU'RE THEY GUY FROM THE MODEL SHOP AREN'T YOU? WELL, IT'S A
            FREE COUNTRY AND I CAN MAKE MODEL PLANES IF I WANT! MY FRIENDS
            USE THEM TO DEFEND THE PLANET FROM THE PURPLE ALIENS! YOU'RE
            ONE OF THEM AREN'T YOU?  STOP FOLLOWING ME!  I KNOW NOTHING!!!

* JonPryce was chewing yogurt and it just blew on the monitor.

<JonPryce>  In other words... ROTFL!
<Mochrie>   Ewwww! 

<JLawrence> #4 WOO ME!!!! WOO ME!!!!!!
<Werd>      HUNNY I HAVEN'T "WOO'D" IN OVER 36 YEARS...YOU CAN'T WOO ANYBODY
            IN THIS GOD FORSAKEN PLACE.

<MrsTony>   LOL!!
<Mochrie>   LOLOL!
<JLawrence> OK, can I guess?
<MrsTony>   Go for it!

<JLawrence> #1 is a Heaven's Gate Cultist??
<MrsTony>   Close enough!!
<JonPryce>  Cult Initiate who thinks YOU are the head cult-guy!

<JLawrence> #2 is a Disco King??

* MrsTony claps enthusiatically!

<JLawrence> Am I right Emile?
<Mochrie>   Yup!
<JonPryce>  Also acceptable: Emile being himself!
<Werd>      LOL!
<Mochrie>   LOL!
<MrsTony>   :)

<JLawrence> #3 was abducted by Aliens?
<MrsTony>   Not quite
<JLawrence> A trekker?

* MrsTony takes her lithium and tries to calm down

<Werd>      Hehe!
<JLawrence> I am lost with Sam.
<MrsTony>   But the voice won't let me sleep!
<JLawrence> You are paranoid?
<Mochrie>   Yay!
<MrsTony>   I am a paranoid schizophrenic

<JLawrence> And number 4 is a Prisoner.
<Werd>      Nope
<JLawrence> Give me another hint!
<Werd>      If only they'd let me out past the manor gates, I could give
            this town some "mature" lovin'!
<JLawrence> A person in an old age home??

<Mochrie>   Woo!!!
<Werd>      Haha bingo!
<Mochrie>   :) :)
<Werd>      A LONELY person in an old age home!

* Mochrie applauds thoroughly! Well done, Angie!

<JLawrence> 3 out of 4 ain't bad!

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Game:    Let's Make A Date
Players: Drew is the contestant, Bremner - Moroccan market vendor,
         JLawrence - Playing a video game, Mochrie - Winnie the Pooh

<Drew>      CONTESTANT NUMBER 1....WHAT IS YOUR IDEA OF "HEAVEN"?
<Bremner>   HEAVEN FOR ME IS A HOT PLACE... AND EVERYTHING COSTS ONLY 30
            DINARS! I'M SURROUNDED BY RUGS.

<Drew>      LOL!

<Bremner>   AND OOH, IT'S TIME TO PRAY LOOKING TOWARDS MECCA!
<Drew>      OKAY, #2...WOO ME!  WOO ME!
<JLawrence> SHHHHHHH CAN'T YOU SEE I AM OCCUPIED........JUMP, DAMMIT!
<Drew>      #3...IF YOU COULD TAKE JUST THREE THINGS TO A DESERT ISLAND,
            WHAT WOULD THEY BE?
<Bremner>   THE DESERT! OH, GET ME OUT OF THERE...FOR ALL THE DINARS IN
            THE WORLD...
<Drew>      HUH?

<JLawrence> Brem! It is Emile's turn!
<Bremner>   No, sometimes people interfere with each other on the show.
<JLawrence> Right!

<Drew>      AHHH!
<Mochrie>   OH BOTHER. THINK, THINK, THINK....I SHOULD LIKE TO THINK THAT
            I'D TAKE MY THREE BIGGEST HUNNY POTS WITH ME....
<Drew>      HMMMM...OKAY FOLKS, TIME FOR ROUND 2....#1...IF YOU WON THE
            LOTTERY, HOW WOULD YOU SPEND YOUR RICHES ON ME?
<Bremner>   I WOULD SPEND THEM BY BUYING YOU THE GREATEST MOSQUE IN THE
            WORLD AND LIVING RIGHT NEXT TO IT. IT WOULD COST A MILLION
            DINARS... NO NINE HUNDRED THOUSAND! NINE HUNDRED THOUSAND
            FIVE HUNDRED DINARS AND THAT'S MY FINAL OFFER!
<Drew>      LOL! #2.....WHAT IS YOUR IDEA OF A LIVING HELL?
<JLawrence> OOOH, I THINK BEING STICK IN A DUNGEON AND NOT BEING ABLE TO
            HEAL........OHHHHHHH GOOOOOOOOOOD NOOOOOOOOO!
<Drew>      HMMMM...#3....WOO ME, DAMMIT!

<JLawrence> Hehe!

<Mochrie>   OH, STUFF AND FLUFF! WELL, I SUPPOSE I SHOULD TRY! OH, I DO
            BELIEVE I NEED SOME HELP! CHRISTOPHER ROBIN!!!!!
<Drew>      LOL! OKAY....I THINK I KNOW...#1....ARE YOU A CRAZED MOSLIM?

<JLawrence> Hehe!
<Mochrie>   LOL! But what is his quirk?
<Bremner>   Close...

<Drew>      THAT HE'S CHEAP? POOR? I NEED MORE...A MOSLIM IN AMERICA WHO
            WANTS TO GET BACK TO MECCA? BUT CAN'T?

<Mochrie>   LOL!
<STokvig>   :)

<Drew>      IS THAT IT?

<Bremner>   No...
<Mochrie>   Not really...
<Bremner>   Does he give up?

<Drew>      WELL I GIVE!

<JLawrence> It was kinda hard guys!
<Bremner>   Ok... I was a Moroccan market vendor.
<Drew>      LOL
<JLawrence> Give him half points.

<Drew>      OH MAN. OKAY, NUMBER TWO....ARE YOU TOO OBSSESSED WITH YOUR
            VIDEO GAME TO HAVE A LIFE?

<JLawrence> Yes!
<Mochrie>   Sounds good to me!
<JLawrence> Sort of!

<Drew>      COOL...NUMBER THREE...YOU'RE POOH BEAR! ;)

<Bremner>   Right... our favourite Daoist bear!!!
<Mochrie>   Oh bother! You're right!
<Drew>      Hehe!

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Game:    Let's Make A Date
Players: BSherwood is the contestant, JoeIsham - a sexually frustrated
         pizza maker, JonPryce - Clive Anderson's neck, Mochrie - a
         disappointed cultist who thought the world would end on the first
         day of 1999, SFry - giving birth, Will - has 24 hours to live.


<BSherwood> CONTESTANT ONE, I LIKE A SPORTY DATE? U INTO SPORTS?
<JoeIsham>  YEAH, I LIKE TOSSING THE BALL AROUND, BUT JUST A LITTLE, 'CAUSE
            IT GETS TOUGH IF YOU DO IT TOO MUCH. NOT THAT I'VE HAD THAT
            PROBLEM LATELY, THOUGH...
<BSherwood> OK...CONTESTANT TWO... TELL ME YOUR FAVOURITE MOVIE TAHT ALWAYS
            MAKES YOU CRY...
<JonPryce>  WHAT MAKES ME CRY? ANY MOVIES WITH BUZZING SOUNDS. THEY REMIND
            ME OF BAD MEMORIES FROM HOME... ::SHUDDER::
<BSherwood> CONTESTANT 3, GIVE ME AN IDEA OF A FUN DATE WITH YOU...
<Mochrie>   FUN? FUN? YOU WANT TO GO OUT AND HAVE FUN? WHAT'S THE BLOODY
            POINT!! WE SHOULDN'T EVEN BE HERE AT ALL!
<BSherwood> HMMM, WHAT A GROUCH!

<Joanne>    LOL!

<BSherwood> CONTESTANT 4.... I LIKE A FIT DATE... WAHT DO YOU DO TO KEEP
            FIT?
<SFry>      WELL, I PUSH, PUSH, PUSH. <breathes heavily holding her stomach>

<Mochrie>   Hehe!
<Joanne>    LOL!
<JonPryce>  LOLOL!

<BSherwood> CONTESTANT 5, I LOVE IRC CHATS... WHAT'S YR FAVE CHATROOM?

<Joanne>    Ooh, good question!

<Will>      I PERSONALLY LIKE ANY CHATS THAT ARE FAST PACED... IF A CHAT IS
            SLOW, IT'S WASTING MY TIME...AND I DON'T HAVE MUCH LEFT!
<BSherwood> OKAY. CONTESTANT 1, WOO ME!
          
<Joanne>    *g*
<JonPryce>  Hehehe!

<JoeIsham>  I'D LIKE TO TAKE YOU IN MY HANDS... AND STRETCH YOU... AND THEN
            ROLL YOU AROUND... AND THEN LAY YOU DOWN FLAT... AND THEN COVER
            YOU WITH SAUCE... AND THEN... *UNGH*!... *UNGH*!!!!............
            *breathing heavily*... YEAH, JUST LIKE THAT.

<Joanne>    LOL!!!!!
<jk>        LOL!
<Will>      LOL!
<krystyn>   LOL!
<SFry>      ROTFL!
<Mochrie>   Ewwww, yet hmmmm.
<Joanne>    LOL!

<BSherwood> HMMM....CONTESTANT TWO, TELL ME WHAT BOOK YOU'RE READING.
<JonPryce>  WELL, I'M READING MY OWN BOOK, "HEAD AND SHOULDERS - WHAT'S
            MISSING?"

<Mochrie>   ROTFL!
<SFry>      :p
<JoeIsham>  HAHA!
<krystyn>   ROTFL!
<Joanne>    LOL!

<BSherwood> CONTESTANT THREE, I LOVE EATING... WAHT SORT OF RESTAURANT WOULD
            U TAKE ME TO?
<Mochrie>   IT WASN'T SUPPOSED TO BE LIKE THIS!! I WOULDN'T TAKE YOU TO EAT
            ANYWHERE BECAUSE THERE'D BE NOWHERE TO TAKE YOU TO! BUT I GUESS,
            I'D TAKE YOU SOMEWHERE TO EAT SOME MELTED ROCKS AND BURNED
            VEGETATION. OR AT LEAST, I WOULD HAVE LIKED TO! SOMEONE MADE A
            MISCALCULATION!

<JonPryce>  ROTFL!!
<Will>      Hehehe!

<BSherwood> CONTESTANT 4, I LOVE HISTORY...WHICH HISTORICAL FIGURE WOULD
            YOU MOST LIEK TO MEET?
<SFry>      <gasping> I WOULD LOVE TO MEET DR SPOCK. <gasp> PUSH, PUSH,
            PUSH... <collapses on the floor>

<Mochrie>   Hehe!
<SFry>      :)
<JonPryce>  LOL!

<BSherwood> CONTESTANT 5, TELL ME ABOUT YOUR HOME..
<Will>      WELL IT'S FILLED WITH ALL THIS JUNK I'VE BOUGHT IN THE LAST FEW
            HOURS. MY CREDIT CARDS ARE MAXED. IT DOESN'T MATTER, I DON'T
            HAVE TO PAY THEM OFF! PLUS THERE'S THIS GIANT CLOCK COUNTING
            DOWN!

<BSherwood> Okay...another round, or shall I guess?
<JonPryce>  Guess, I suppose.
<Mochrie>   Try and guess.
<BSherwood> Joe is a sex maniac?
<JoeIsham>  Close... 
<SFry>      :)
<JonPryce>  And his quirk would be...?
<dfw>       LOL!
<Mochrie>   Oh!!! That's bad! :)
<BSherwood> Or maybe he's worried about impotence...
<Joanne>    LOL!
<JoeIsham>  Sexually frustrated..... what?
<Mochrie>   Read his last response carefully.
<BSherwood> Okay. :) I was close.
<JoeIsham>  I was a sexually frustrated pizza maker.
<BSherwood> Dan has had his head cut off with a chainsaw?
<Mochrie>   No! LOL!
<JonPryce>  Not exactly...
<SFry>      Hehehehehe!
<BSherwood> A victim of the Texas chainsaw massacre? Something chainsawish?
<Joanne>    LOL!
<JonPryce>  No, I was a missing part of Clive... his neck
<Joanne>    That was a hard one! :)
<BSherwood> Damn! :(
<Mochrie>   Hehe, and me?
<BSherwood> Emile is deceased.... no longer with us...
<Mochrie>   No, not as such...
<BSherwood> A ghost? Victim of a nuclear explosion?
<Mochrie>   Nope. Shall I give him the answer?
<BSherwood> Yep.

* Mochrie was a disappointed cultist who thought the world would end on the
  first day of 1999.

<Joanne>    Another tough one!
<BSherwood> Hmmm, very good. :) Molly was giving birth.
<SFry>      Yeah! Good one, Dean! :)

* SFry give Dean a kiss on the cheek!

<BSherwood> Will thinks the world is about to end? Or he has a few months
            to live?
<Will>      Close! 24 hours to live =) Time's up!

* Will dies!

<BSherwood> Yay!
<Mochrie>   Hehe!
<Joanne>    Good job!
<JoeIsham>  Yay!

* Mochrie resurrects Will from the dead.

<BSherwood> Oh well, 2 and a half right!
<Mochrie>   Good try dean!
<Joanne>    Yaaaay, that was good!

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Game:    Let's Make A Date
Players: Denny is the contestant, Brady - Lisa (the obsessed Will Durst
         Fan), Mochrie - a punk rocker, SFry - someone obsessed with
         John Sessions, Wayne - Denny's ex-husband

<Denny>   BACHELOR NUMBER ONE ...
<Brady>   YES?

* Brady adjusts her binder on her lap and looks expectant.

<Denny>   THERE'S NOTHING I LOVE MORE THAN BEING ROMANCED. HOW WOULD YOU
          ROMANCE ME?
<Brady>   I WOULD FIRST SHOW YOU THIS BINDER AND THEN TAKE YOU OUT TO SEE
          HIM. HE'S JUST AMAZING. AND IF YOU'D BE SO NICE TO BLOCK HER,
          CAUSE SHE HATES ME, EVIL WOMAN, I'D BE EXTRA NICE. IF IT HELPS ME
          TALK TO HIM.
<Denny>   WELL, SOUNDS LOVELY. I'LL *WATCH* FOR THAT.

* Brady peeks into the huge binder she's holding distractedly as she speaks.

<Denny>   BACHELOR NUMBER TWO...
<Mochrie> YA?
<Denny>   IF I WERE AN ICE CREAM SUNDAE, WHAT KIND OF TOPPING WOULD YOU BE?
<Mochrie> RIGHT, WELL I'D UH BE CHOCOLATE, CUZ IT'S SWEET, LIKE YOU, AND I
          WOULDN'T NEED A SPOON, I'D JUST USE ME HAIR!
<Denny>   UM, RIGHT. SOUNDS STICKY.
<Mochrie> RACK OFF!

<Wayne>   LOL!

<Denny>   BACHELOR NUMBER THREE...
<SFry>    YES?
<Denny>   WHAT'S YOUR IDEA OF THE PERFECT EVENING?
<SFry>    WELL I WOULD TAKE YOU TO SEE PRINCESS CARIBOU, AND SING A FEW FOLK
          SONGS.
<Denny>   GEE, YOU SOUND HELLA DULL. BACHELOR NUMBER FOUR...
<Wayne>   WHAT!? =(
<Denny>   WELL, I SEE WE'RE IN A CHEERY MOOD! BACHELOR NUMBER FOUR, I LOVE
          CARS. IF YOU WERE A CAR, WHAT KIND WOULD YOU BE AND WHY?
<Wayne>   I'D BE A MONSTER TRUCK SO I COULD RUN YOU OVER AFTER YOU TOOK ME
          FOR EVERYTHING I HAD!!
<Denny>   ROB?

* Brady bites her bottom lip and tries not to howl!

<Mochrie> LOL!
<SFry>    :)
<Denny>   That refers to my ex, BTW, not the one you all know!
<Wayne>   (This is not true Julie!)
<Brady>   I know Jules, it's doubly funny for me! :)
<Denny>   Well, I hope not!
<Wayne>   LOL!

<Denny>   OK, BACHELOR NUMBER ONE...

* Brady looks up from where she was staring at her watch.

<Brady>   YEAH?
<Denny>   I LOVE THE GREAT CITY OF SAN FRANCISCO. IF YOU COULD GO ANYWHERE
          IN SF, WHERE WOULD IT BE, AND WHY?
<Brady>   I WOULD GO ANYWHERE HE WAS. DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY PICTURES OF HIM
          I HAVE ON MY WALLS? 18 INCH, BIG ONES. AND IT'S ESPECIALLY GOOD
          IF HE'S AROUND AND SHE'S NOT.  WANT TO SEE A PICTURE OF HIM IN SF?

* Brady holds out the binder.

<Denny>   UM, MAYBE LATER. BACHELOR NUMBER TWO...
<Mochrie> YES, LUV? LIKE ME MOHAWK?
<Denny>   UM, IT'S VERY...SPIKY. IF YOU WROTE ME A LOVE LETTER, WHAT WOULD
          YOU SAY?
<Mochrie> OH LUV, THAT'S EASY. "LUV: RACK OFF! YOU'RE ME GIRL, AND I LUV YA.
          EACH OF ME CHAINS, AND EACH OF ME PINS IN ME NOSE ARE FOR YOU!"

<Wayne>   LOL!

<Denny>   THAT IS SO BEAUTIFUL. DO YOU SET OFF METAL DETECTORS?
<Mochrie> ALL THE TIME LUV, IT'S HELLA EMBARRASING!
<Denny>   OK ... BACHELOR NUMBER THREE......
<SFry>    YES, ME LADY?
<Denny>   I LIKE AN OLD-FASHIONED GENTLEMAN WHO HOLDS OPEN DOORS AND THINGS
          LIKE THAT. HOW WOULD YOU TREAT ME ON A DATE?
<SFry>    WELL, I WOULD BE REALLY NICE TO YOU. I WOULD READ TO YOU POETRY
          AND STUFF FROM DYLAN THOMAS, AND THEN SING SOME MORE FOLK SONGS
          ABOUT TV SETS. AND THEN I WOULD SHOW PICTURES OF ME WITH MY
          FAVORITE COMEDIAN / IMPROVISOR.
<Denny>   LOVELY. OK, THEN. BACHELOR NUMBER FOUR...
<Wayne>   WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!???????????
<Denny>   I LOVE PRESENTS LIKE FLOWERS AND CHOCOLATES. WHAT WOULD YOU BRING
          TO ME ON OUR DATE?
<Wayne>   A TIME BOMB.
<Denny>   UM, OK THEN...

<SFry>    :)
<Mochrie> Hehe!
<Wayne>   <Buzzzzz!>
<Mochrie> Ready to guess, Denny? ;-)
<Denny>   Ready!

<Denny>   WELL, BACHELOR NUMBER ONE IS LISA, THE INSANELY OBSESSED WILL
          DURST FAN WHO DEBI DURST HATES!

<Wayne>   Yep!
<Brady>   Hehehe, gee, was I obvious? :)
<Mochrie> Yay!

* Brady goes to take a shower.

<Denny>   BACHELOR NUMBER TWO IS A BRIT PUNK ROCKER!

<Mochrie> Right, luv!
<Wayne>   Yep!

<Denny>   BACHELOR NUMBER THREE IS AN ACTOR USING THE SHOW FOR HIS BIG
          BREAK...I MEAN, JOHN SESSIONS!

<Mochrie> Close enough! :)
<SFry>    Close!
<Wayne>   Yep! Close enough
<Denny>   Session Man?
<Mochrie> She's obsessed with JS.
<Brady>   *L* Jules, yep :)

<Denny>   BACHELOR NUMBER FOUR IS MY EX-HUSBAND!

<Mochrie> Way to go!! Four for four!
<SFry>    :)
<Denny>   Woohoo! :-)

* SFry didn't do that well

<Mochrie> Mol: You did good :)
<Wayne>   Yep - I didn't mean that stuff, Julie!
<Denny>   I figured, David - we've never been married!
<SFry>    :)

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Game:    Let's Make A Date
Players: Mochrie is the contestant, ChipEsten - a politician, EIzzard - a
         midwife, Greg - the chicken crossing the road

<Mochrie>   BACHELOR NUMBER ONE. I'M INTO LONG WALKS BY THE SEASIDE WITH MY
            SPECIAL SOMEONE, EVEN IF IT'S JUST ME, MYSELF AND I. WHAT ARE
            YOU INTO, NUMBER ONE?
<EIzzard>   I'M INTO THE FIRST STAGES, SO I NEED YOU TO BREATHE HONEY, COME
            ON, JUST DEEP BREATHS, YOU CAN DO IT.
<Mochrie>   WOW, THAT SOUNDS...INTIMATE.

<EIzzard>   LOL!
<Greg>      *g*
<kim_colin> Heehee!

<Mochrie>   BACHELOR NUMBER TWO. I'M EXTREMELY WELL LEARNED, AND LOVE TO
            READ STUFF BY ALL SORTS OF DIFFERENT AUTHORS. WHAT DO YOU LIKE
            TO READ, NUMBER TWO?
<Greg>      BOCK BOCK! *CAR HORNS* BOCK BOCK CLUCK!

<ChipEsten> Bock??? :)
<kim_colin> :) LOL!
<EIzzard>   Help...

<Greg>      *BOCK* TO YOU TOO!
<Mochrie>   YOU SOUND LIKE A GREAT CLUCKER, NUMBER TWO!

* ChipEsten will refrain from comment.

<kim_colin> Oh, bad! :)
<Greg>      *g*

<Mochrie>   BACHELOR NUMBER THREE. IF YOU WERE A ZESTY SIDE DISH IN AN
            ITALIAN RESTAURANT, WHAT WOULD YOU BE?
<ChipEsten> ER, WELL THAT ALL DEPENDS ON THE AVAILABLE BORROWING REQUIREMENT
            WHICH THIS PENNY-PINCHING GOVERNMENT OF OURS WILL ALLOW FOR THE
            PURCHASE OF SIDE DISHES. MORE AND MORE RESTAURANTS ARE CLOSING
            DUE TO THE LACK OF SIDE DISH PURCHASES DUE TO THE DISGRACEFUL,
            SHABBY WAY THIS SELFISH ADMINISTRATION TREATS SMALL BUSINESSES,
            AND THAT'S AN OUTRAGE.
<Mochrie>   OH SORRY, I NODDED OFF THERE, NUMBER THREE.
<EIzzard>   I NEED HELP HERE! SHE'S READY! SOMEONE GET ME SOME DRUGS BEFORE
            SHE RIPS MY ARM OFF!
<Greg>      BOCK BOCK BOCK!!!! 
<Mochrie>   NUMBER ONE. IF WE GOT MARRIED AND HAD A LOT OF CHILDREN, WHAT
            WOULD YOU NAME THEM?
<EIzzard>   I'D PROBABLY NAME THEM PAIN AND SUFFERING CAUSE THAT'S WHAT WE'RE
            BOTH GOING THROUGH RIGHT NOW! I NEED A FRIGGIN DOCTOR! SHE'S
            GONNA DROP IT!

<Greg>      LOL!

<ChipEsten> WE PROMISE MORE BILLIONS WILL BE PLOUGHED INTO THE SERVICE TO
            MAKE YOUR JOB MUCH EASIER.
<Mochrie>   OH, I LIKE PAIN. I COULD SHOW YOU MY WHIP COLLECTION. ;-)

<kim_colin> oooOOOooo!

* Greg clucks nervously.
           
<EIzzard>   THAT SORT OF PAIN IS NOTHING COMPARED TO WHAT SHE'S GOING
            THROUGH!
<Mochrie>   BACHELOR NUMBER TWO! WHAT'S YOUR FAVOURITE HOLIDAY, AND WHY?
<Greg>      BOCK BOCK BOCK! *cars wizz by*

<EIzzard>   LOL *sigh*
<ChipEsten> Not Turkey then? :)
<Mochrie>   Um...is that a hint? :)
<ChipEsten> No!
<Mochrie>   LOL!

* kim_colin chringes at the bad jokes.
* Greg is happy with turkey being served for Thanksgiving.

<Mochrie>   OKAY. UM...

<ChipEsten> LOL, come on Emile, nearly there :)

<EIzzard>   OOOOWWWWWWW!! SHES GRIPPING MY ARM! GET THE DAMN THING OUT OF
            HER ALREADY!
<Mochrie>   BACHELOR NUMBER THREE. I'M A ROMANTIC IN MY HEART WHO LOVES
            POETRY. WRITE ME A POEM. AND MAKE IT IN IAMBIC PENTAMETER. ;-)

<EIzzard>   What the hell??... yikes! LOL!

<ChipEsten> I SEE YOUR SHINING EYES, BUT THEY CANNOT SEE;
<ChipEsten> DUE TO THE GOVERNMENT'S LACK OF FORESIGHT IN GIVING HEALTH MONEY;
<ChipEsten> BUT WHEN YOU VOTE FOR US, YOU'LL SEE MORE THAN JUST THE STARS;
<ChipEsten> WE'LL SLASH THE INTEREST ON YOUR MORTGAGE, AND CUT THE PETROL
            TAX FOR YOUR CARS :)
<Mochrie>   OH! THAT WAS BEAUTIFUL. I THINK I'M GONNA CRY!

* Greg sheds some tears and scratches the pavement.
* ChipEsten hasn't done the iambic pentameter since he was 18, and didn't
  understand it then either! :)
* Mochrie hasn't either, just pulling your chain! ;-)

<EIzzard>   LOL! *g*
<Greg>      *g*
<ChipEsten> Time for some guesses, methinks :)

<EIzzard>   GUESS NOW BEFORE SHE HAS IT ON THE FLOOR!
<Mochrie>   OH CLIVE, I CAN'T DECIDE. THEY WERE ALL SO INTERESTING, AND YET
            THEY WERE ALL...SO....MAD!

* Greg races around like her heads chopped off!

<ChipEsten> Yeah, spare the banter - guesses please! :)

<Mochrie>   NUMBER ONE, ARE YOU A DOCTOR THINKING I'M GIVING BIRTH?

<ChipEsten> Hmmmm....
<Greg>      Close....
<EIzzard>   So close...
<kim_colin> Oooo...the suspence!
<Greg>      Can I give him a clue?

<Mochrie>   ARE YOU JUST A PERSON WHO THINKS I'M GIVING BIRTH?

<Greg>      Noooo...

<Mochrie>   ARE YOU MY HUSBAND WHO THINKS I'M GIVING BIRTH?

<ChipEsten> Who helps the woman who's birthing??
<EIzzard>   Help! LOL!

<Mochrie>   ARE YOU THE NURSE?

<EIzzard>   Close enuf!

* Greg claps approvingly.

<EIzzard>   Yay!
<ChipEsten> Midwife, so yeah :)
<Mochrie>   Oh, midwife. *smack*

<Mochrie>   NUMBER TWO, YOU WOULDN'T HAPPEN TO BE THE CHICKEN CROSSING THE
            ROAD, WOULD YOU?

* kim_colin claps loudly.

<ChipEsten> Hehehe, bit of a giveaway. :)
<Greg>      Ding ding ding! We have a winner!
<EIzzard>   Well done, Emile! :o)

<Mochrie>   AND NUMBER THREE...ARE YOU THE LEADER OF THE LABOUR PARTY?

<EIzzard>   LOL!
<ChipEsten> Not quite so specific

<Mochrie>   OR A POLITICIAN IN GENERAL?

<ChipEsten> Yep.
<Mochrie>   Labour! ;-) 
<EIzzard>   He's Clinton! ;o)

<ChipEsten> I CHOSE TO BE A POLITICIAN BECAUSE IT IS IN MY NATURE TO SPOUT
            CONVALUTED, SELF CENTRED BOLLOCKS WHICH NO ONE UNDERSTANDS...

<Greg>      What did you say? *g*
<ChipEsten> LOL

<Mochrie>   AND HOW IS THAT DIFFERENT THAN THE WAY YOU ARE, MATT? :)
<ChipEsten> CHEEKY! STILL, YOU GOT MY NAME RIGHT....

<ChipEsten> Game over I think - Emile, let's go on our date :)
<ChipEsten> McDonald's or KFC? :)
<EIzzard>   LOL!
<Mochrie>   LOL! :)

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Game:    Let's Make A Date
Players: D_Siegel is the contestant, Bremner - Playing every WL game,
         JoeIsham - Infomercials, Mochrie - Santa Claus at his wit's end,
         Musikurt - Obsessed with Pi (the number, NOT the baked goods ;-)

<D_Siegel> BACHELOR NUMERO UN... I JUST *ADORE* GUYS THAT CAN SING...WHAT
           WOULD YOU SING TO ME ON OUR FIRST DATE?
<Bremner>  OH, HIDEY DIDEY DIDEY DIDEY DIDEY DIDEY DIE!
           I'D SING TO YOU A LITTLE SONG.
           YOU'D GET TO PICK THE STYLE
           AND I'D WAIT UNTIL YOU BUZZED ME OUT
           (WHICH MAY BE QUITE A WHILE!)
           OH, HIDEY DIDEY DIDEY DIDEY DIDEY DIDEY DIE!
<D_Siegel> ARE YOU FINISHED? *s*
<Bremner>  YES SIR.
<D_Siegel> EXCUSE ME?
<Bremner>  YES, ISN'T THAT YOUR QUIRK?
<D_Siegel> UM... YEAH...BACHELOR 2!
<JoeIsham> HI THERE!
<D_Siegel> WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE KIND OF FOOD?
<JoeIsham> IT DOESN'T REALLY MATTER, I ENJOY EVERYTHING. PARTICULARLY WHEN
           IT'S GRILLED ON THE NEW "MUHAMMAD ALI FAT-ATTACKER SUPER SNACKER"
           GRILLER!

<Mochrie>  Hehe!
<Bremner>  Hehe!

<JoeIsham> AND I ALSO GOT THREE JARS OF SPICES FREE WHEN I CALLED 1-800-ALI-
           SNAX!
<D_Siegel> *SIGH* YES...ANYWAY! MOVING ON QUICKLY!
<JoeIsham> YOU'D BETTER DO IT NOW... OPERATORS ARE STANDING BY!
<D_Siegel> BACHLOR TRES... I LOVE GUYS THAT ARE ABLE TO GET IN TOUCH WITH
           THEIR FEMININE SIDE, DO YOU LIKE THE COLOR PINK AND WHY?
<Mochrie>  DO I LIKE PINK? DO I LIKE *PINK*?
<D_Siegel> YES...
<Mochrie>  ANY COLOUR IS BETTER THAN RED! RED AND WHITE! BLOODY RED AND
           WHITE! I CAN'T STAND IT!!
<D_Siegel> NO U THOUGH PLEASE... ;) SAVE YOUR KEYBOARD...BACHELOR CUATRO!
           WHAT IS THE WORST COSTUME YOU'VE EVER SEEN? ;)
<Musikurt> WELL...YOU MEAN BESIDES TYLER CHANGING IN THE VAN? THEN I'D HAVE
           TO SAY SOMEONE THAT DRESSED UP AS A CALCULATOR THAT ONLY WENT TO
           3 DIGITS.  HOW CAN YOU EFFECTIVELY CALCULATE THE RADIUS OF A
           CIRCLE IF YOUR CALCULATOR ONLY GOES TO THEE DIGITS....I MEAN EVEN
           22/7 ISN'T EVEN ACCURATELY CALCULATED AT ALL...

<Mochrie>  LOL!
<Bremner>  HA!!!

<Musikurt> YOU ONLY GET A SLICE OF IT IN THREE DIGITS!
<D_Siegel> BACHELOR 1, TAKE ME AWAY FROM IT ALL...
<Bremner>  IN WHAT FILM OR THEATRE STYLE WOULD YOU LIKE ME TO DO THAT?
<D_Siegel> *EG* PORNO!
<Bremner>  SWEDISH OR GERMAN OR REGULAR?

<Mochrie>  KIK! Err...LOL!

<D_Siegel> REGULAR
<Bremner>  *PULLS OUT GIANT, WEIRD PROP* WHO ORDERED A TWELVE-INCH SAUSAGE?
           *BUZZZZZ*
<D_Siegel> BACHELOR 2? SMACK BACHELOR 1 THEN TELL ME WHAT WE'D DO ON OUR
           FIRST DATE.

* JoeIsham smacks Bachelor 1
* Mochrie checks his list and crosses off one name

<Bremner>  OUCH! THAT WASN'T PART OF YOUR QUIRK!
<JoeIsham> WE'D GO BACK TO MY PLACE AND USE MY HARPFLEX! IT HAS 9754
           DIFFERENT EXERCISES, AS YOU'LL SEE ON THIS VIDEO...
<Bremner>  AND HOW MUCH WOULD YOU EXPECT TO PAY FOR THAT? FORTY-NINE
           DOLLARS? THIRTY DOLLARS?
<JoeIsham> YOU CAN GET THE VIDEO BY CALLING 1-800-HARP-4-OW!
<Bremner>  AND THE VIDEO FEATURES THAT GREAT... FORTIES DISCO HIT, "INHALE
           AND EXHALE!"

<Mochrie>  LOL!

* Musikurt begins taking measurements across the stool he's sitting on.
* JoeIsham smacks Bachelor 2 again.

<Bremner>  TAKE IT AWAY, LAURA HALL AND LINDA TAYLOR!
<D_Siegel> BACHELOR 3? SMACK BACHELOR 2 AND TELL ME IF YOU'RE NAUGHTY OR
           NICE, OR NICELY NAUGHTY THIS YEAR...

* Mochrie smacks bachelor 2, then crosses his name from the list

<Mochrie>  NAUGHTY? NICE? I'M NEITHER. I'M TIRED! I'VE BUSTED MY ASS ALL
           YEAR, WITH NO HELP FROM THOSE LAZY VERTICALLY-CHALLENGED BUMS!
           EVERYONE EXPECTS ME TO BE ALL GOOD AND NICE AND HAPPY. WHAT A
           LOAD OF CRAP! JUST GIMME A BOTTLE OF WHISKEY AND A COUPLE OF
           NICE HO HO HOS!

<D_Siegel> *lol*

<Mochrie>  AND WHERE IS IT WRITTEN THAT I HAVE TO DO ALL THIS IN ONE BLOODY
           NIGHT! IT'S SCIENTIFICALLY *IMPOSSIBLE*! AND WHAT DO I GET?
           NOTHING EXCEPT THOSE MISERABLE FLYING RATS! AND WHY I GOT STUCK
           WITH THE ONE WITH A NASAL CONDITION IS BEYOND ME! BAH HUMBUG!
<D_Siegel> BACHELOR 4, SMACK YOURSELF REPEATEDLY AND TELL ME YOUR FAVORITE
           CLASS IN SCHOOL...

* Musikurt takes out a tape measure, measures the diameter of his watch and
  begins calculations on scratch paper.
* Mochrie lays a finger inside of his nose...

<Musikurt> I'M SORRY, BUT I CAN'T SMACK MYSELF AND FIGURE OUT SQUARE INCHES
           AT THE SAME TIME....MY FAVORITE CLASS IS BEST SAID IN A JOKE I
           ONCE HEARD.
<D_Siegel> YES?
<Musikurt> WHAT DID THE ACORN SAY WHEN HE GREW UP...
<D_Siegel> I DON'T KNOW..
<Musikurt> GEE AH'M A TREE!!!
<Bremner>  HE SAID, "IT'S TIME TO PLAY PRESS CONFERENCE!"
<D_Siegel> *GROAN* SOMEONE SMACK HIM WITH TROUT PLEASE...
<Musikurt> AND BECAUSE OF THAT CLASS, MY GPA IS NOW 3.14159272!
<Mochrie>  AND MILK AND COOKIES? NO WONDER I WEIGH 40 STONE! ALL THOSE
           WHINY BRATS LEAVE ME ARE DAMNED MILK AND COOKIES! I *HATE* MILK
           AND COOKIES! I MEAN, FOR GOD'S SAKE GIMME SOME MEAT OR SOMETHING!
           I'M ON THE VERGE OF EATING THAT DAMNED RAT WITH THE GLOWING NOSE!
<D_Siegel> *SIGH* ANY MORE COMMENTS? JOE?

* Musikurt begins taking measurements to calculate Bachelor number three's
  volume...

<Mochrie>  BUG OFF! OR I WON'T GET YOU THAT COMPASS SET THAT YOU ASKED ME
           FOR AT THE MALL.
<JoeIsham> YOU CAN GET MILK AND COOKIES BULK-DELIVERED BY CALLING 1-800-
           FEED-ME-2!

* D_Siegel sits back to watch the insanity until she can guess...

<JoeIsham> IT'S ONLY 19.95 EASY INSTALLMENTS OF $4 EACH!
<Bremner>  UMM, NUMBER 4, YOU'LL HAVE TO DO THAT WHILST BEING MOVED BY A
           MEMBER OF THE STUDIO AUDIENCE.
<Musikurt> LET'S SEE...NOW I CAN FIGURE OUT THE DIAMETER BY GOING
           56=2(3.1415)(R)...

<Mochrie>  Have we confused our lovely bachelorette?
<JoeIsham> I hope so! :)
<D_Siegel> Most of you no... but that one *points to CJ* *S*

<Musikurt> BUT IF I DON'T HAVE THE COMPASS SET, I CAN'T CONINUE TO MAKE
           PRACTICE MODELS USING VAYRING RADII! AND THEN SECTIONING THEM
           OFF INTO SLICES!
<Bremner>  HOW ABOUT IT?
<JoeIsham> SURE YOU CAN! JUST CALL WITHIN THE NEXT 2 MINUTES AND GET THE
           RADIUS-BOY COMPASS SET!
<Bremner>  AND A CUP WITH A HOLE IN IT! AND PRIME MINISTER JOHN MAJOR!
<Musikurt> BUT THE DUTCH APPLE BRAND IS BETTER THAN THE RADIUS BOY
<Mochrie>  YEAH, AND PROBABLY EVERY ONE OF THOSE SNOT-NOSED BUGGERS ARE
           GONNA WANT THEM NEXT YEAR. WHAT AM I, A BLOODY MANUFACTURING
           PLANT, FOR GOD'S SAKE??
<JoeIsham> TALK TO HIM ABOUT THAT (points to #3)
<Musikurt> I COULD FINALLY CALCULATE THE VOLUME OF THE PRIME MINISTERS HEAD,
           THOUGH...LET'S SEE HERE...

<D_Siegel> OK, EV IS DREW/CLIVE OR THINKS I'M DREW/CLIVE... OR SOMETHING TO
           THAT EFFECT?

<Bremner>  Yep. :-)

<D_Siegel> JOE IS ALL THE ANNOYING INFOMERCIALS I TURN OFF AT 3 AM!

<Mochrie>  Yay!!!!
<Musikurt> 3:14 AM???

<D_Siegel> I WANT TO PICK EM, AND SHOW MR CLAUS NOT TO FORGET US NAUGHTY
           GIRLS TOO *EG*

<Mochrie>  Yep. Santa at his wit's end!

<D_Siegel> AND CJ IS MR BENNET/IS OBBSESSED BY EXACT CALCULATTIONS/NUMBERS
           OR SOMTHING TO THAT EFFECT?

<Musikurt> Fascinated with Pi. Yeah.

* D_Siegel collapses.
* Mochrie had fun being naughty.
* Bremner had fun playing every WL game.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Game:    Let's Make A Date
Players: DevilTrace is the contestant, Evan - Thinks Tracy is a leper,
         KerriOTPS - Alien plotting to overthrow the earth, Lisapie - A
         person obsessed with shiny things.

* DevilTrace is now known as Bachelorette
* Evan is now known as Bachelor1
* KerriOTPS is now known as Bachelor2
* Lisapie is now known as Bachelor3

<Clivey>       WE NOW MOVE ONTO A GAME CALLED LET'S MAKE A DATE! THIS
               FEATURES TRACY AS OUR LOVELY, VOLUPTUOUS BACHELORETTE...

* Bachelorette blows kisses

<Clivey>       EVAN, KERRI AND LISA ARE THE CHARMING BACHELORS WHO TRACY
               WILL BE QUESTIONING. EACH OF THEM WILL BE GIVEN A STRANGE
               BEHAVIOUR OR QUIRK, WHICH TRACY WILL HAVE TO DETERMINE
               THROUGH THE QUESTIONS SHE ASKS OF THEM. NOW, OUR LOVELY
               BACHELORETTE CAN START ASKING QUESTIONS. AND AWAY YOU GO!

<Bachelorette> OKIES, HELLO BACHELORS!!!! *FLIPS HAIR*

* Bachelor3 watches Bachelorette's hair.

<Bachelorette> BACHELOR #1, I LIKE THINGS FAST, WHAT KINDA CAR WOULD YOU
               PICK ME UP IN FOR A DATE?
<Bachelor1>    DATE? BAAAHHHHHH!! UNCLEAN! UNCLEAN!
<Bachelorette> *GIGGLES* OK, FRRRREAKKY!:)
<Bachelor1>    AN AMBULANCE...I'D WEAR MY SHINIEST LATEX GLOVES WHEN I SHAKE
               YOUR HAND AT THE DOOR (AND HOPE IT DOESN'T FALL OFF)
<Bachelor3>    THOSE GLOVES SOUND NICE...
<Bachelor1>    GAAAAAHHHHH!
<Bachelorette> OOOOOH, COOL....A CLEAN-FREAK!
<Bachelor2>    *BLEEP BLEEP ZORT*
<Bachelor1>    DON'T TOUCH THEM!!!! THEY'RE UNHOLY! UNCLEAN!
<Bachelorette> OK, BACHELOR #2 *GIVES #1 A CONFUSED LOOK*, I HAVE A THING FOR
               WANTING TO SKIP STRAIGHT TO 'DESSERT' ON A DINNER DATE, WHAT
               KIND OF DESSERTS DO YOU LIKE?
<Bachelor2>    TYPICALLY, I LIKE TRIBBLES WITH A LIGHT COATING OF TASERED
               CREAM....YOU MUST TRY IT SOMETIME, YOU WOULD LIKE IT VERY
               MUCH.  YOU WOULD... YOU WOULD....TAKE ME TO THIS PERSON YOU
               TERRANS CALL DUBYA.
<Bachelorette> OH, SOUNDS UM, TASTY....

* Bachelor3 stares at Bachelor2'S head.

<Bachelor2>    WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT?  I AM FRENCH.
<Bachelor3>    AN AWFULLY BALD FRENCHMAN...
<Bachelorette> *FLIPS HAIR AGAIN* BACHELOR #3, I AM A STRICT CATHOLIC, HOW
               WOULD YOU HELP ME KEEP WITHIN MY MORALS? OR NOT, AS THE CASE
               MAY BE. ;)

* Bachelor2 looks at B3

<Bachelor2>    STAY AWAY FROM THE HEAD, TERRAN!
<Bachelor3>    I WOULD...WOW, THAT HAIR...YOU MUST WASH IT SO CAREFULLY FOR
               IT TO LOOK LIKE THAT...I WOULD KEEP YOU WITHIN YOUR MORALS
               BY...WOW, IS THAT WATCH SILVER?
<Bachelorette> *FLIPS HAIR AGAIN* WELL YES, I DO TAKE CARE OF MY HAIR....

* Bachelor3 stares at the watch.

<Bachelorette> *PUTS HER HAND OVER HER WATCH* YES, IT IS SILVER....
<Bachelor3>    OH UM...HI, MY ANSWER....OOH, DIAMOND EARRINGS....
<Bachelor1>    WATCH OUT THAT HAND DOESN'T FALL OFF!!!! GAAAAAAH!

* Bachelor1 backs away.

<Bachelorette> OK *STARTS FEELING A TAD FREAKED* :)

<Bachelor2>    *AIMS LASER GUN* STAY STILL OR YOU WILL BE ASSIMILATED.
<Bachelor3>    OOOOH...LOOK AT THAT GUN...IT REFLECTS THE LIGHT IN HERE SO
               NICELY...
<Bachelorette> OK....

* Bachelor2 *shoots down B3*
* Bachelor3 collapses on the floor...

<Bachelor3>    PRETTY CHAIR LEGS....THUD
<Bachelor2>    *SPEAKS INTO WRIST LINK* IT'S TIME TO COME DOWN, NOW NOW NOW!
<Bachelorette> *EYEBROWS SHOOT UP* WOW...UM....OH WOW, #2, THERE'S MORE LIKE
               YOU?  SOUNDS LIKE A PARTY!!:)
<Bachelor2>    YOU WOULD ENJOY BECOMING ONE OF US, TERRAN. NOW TAKE ME TO
               YOUR LEADER.
<Bachelor1>    BUT BACHELORETTE, THAT'S WHAT YOU WILL LOOK LIKE IF WE DON'T
               GET YOU TO HAWAII SOON!
<Bachelor3>    *STIRS* LOOK AT THE BUCKLE ON THOSE HEELS....
<Bachelor1>    COME ON, WE HAVE TO TAKE HER TO HAWAII! GLOVES ON, EVERYONE!
               UNCLEAN! UNCLEAN!

* Bachelor3 crawls over and grab's Bachelorette's foot...

<Clivey>       *BUZZZZZ!*
<Bachelor2>    ALL OF YOU, TO THE MOTHER SHIP!  NOW!
<Clivey>       ALRIGHTY....TRACY, DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHO THIS MOTLEY CREW
               IS?
<Bachelorette> OK.....I'M THINKING THAT #1 IS SOMETHING LIKE A CLEAN-FREAK
               PREACHER OF SOME SORT....CAN'T DATE THAT ONE. *g*
<Clivey>       NOOOOOO..........
<Bachelorette> BUT ON THE OTHER HAND, I'M LIKELY NOT EVEN CLOSE*G*

<Bachelor1>    Close enough...
<Clivey>       Let's give tracy a "hand" for a good guess.

<Bachelorette> LOL, PARDON THE PUN.

* Bachelor2 thinks her hand is already gone, so we can hand her her own
  back....

<Clivey>       One more stab at #1?

<Bachelorette> (I'm thinking hard yet really not sure *g*)
<Bachelor1>    Give her a hand? yeah, it'll replace the diseased one
<Bachelorette> Oh wait....#1 is a leper?

* Bachelor2 starts to sing "I Fall To Pieces...."
* Clivey hears a song by Hansen

<Clivey>       Close enough. He thinks you are a leper.
<Bachelor1>    Yep!
<Bachelorette> Wow, you mean I'm right??*g*

* Bachelor2 claps

<Clivey>       Now, #2?
<Bachelorette> Yes!! OK, #2 is a race of aliens trying to take over Earth
<Clivey>       Yes!
<Bachelor2>    Gee, I hope I wasn't too obvious on that one or anything....
<Bachelor3>    LOL!
<Bachelorette> hehe, not really*g*
<Bachelor1>    Hehehe :-)
<Clivey>       And #3?
<Bachelorette> Someone who seems to be attracted to shiny, expensive things.
<Bachelor1>    Yep! :-)
<Bachelor3>    Doesn't have to be expensive :)
<Bachelor1>    she's a good one :-)
<Bachelorette> OK, someone who is attracted to shiny things :)
<Bachelor3>    *clap*
<Bachelor2>    That she is!
<Bachelor3>    Yse i am :)

* Bachelorette stands up and takes a bow

<Clivey>       WOO!!
<Bachelorette> Yes!!
<Clivey>       *buzzzzz!*
<Bachelor3>    Nice job everyone!
<Clivey>       wtg trace!
<Bachelorette> ta Em :)

----------------------------------------------------------------------------