Sardarji
Sardarji got the 4th child. He fills data in the
birth certificate.
"Mother: Sikh. Father: Sikh. Kid: Chinese."
"How come you write "Chinese" when both parents are Sikh?"
"Aah, Sardarji have read in newspaper, it says that
every 4th person born on the Earth is a Chinese."
Why did 18 sardarjis go to a movie?
Because below 18 was not allowed
We don't sell to SARDARS
Sardar went to the appliance store sale and found a bargain. "I would like to buy this small TV," he told the salesman."Sorry, we don't sell to SARDARs," he replied.
He hurried home removed his turban and changed his hair style, and returned to tell the salesman "I would like to buy this TV.""Sorry, we don't sell to Sardars," Salesman replied.
"Damn, he recognized me," he thought. He went for a complete disguise this time, haircut and new hair color, new outfit, big sunglasses, then waited a few days before he again approached the salesman. "I would like to buy this TV.""Sorry, we don't sell to Sardars," he replied.
Frustrated, he exclaimed "How do you know I'm a Sardar?""Because that's a microwave," he replied.
One afternoon, a wealthy lawyer was riding in the back
of his limousine when he saw two men eating grass by the
road side. He ordered his driver to stop and he got out
to investigate.
"Why are you eating grass?" he asked one man.
"We don't have any money for food,"the poor man replied.
"Oh, come along with me then," instructed the lawyer.
"But, sir, I have a wife and two children!"
"Bring them along!" replied the lawyer. He turned to
the other man and said, "Come with us."
"But sir, I have a wife and six children!"
the second man answered.
"Bring them as well!" answered the lawyer as
he headed for his limo.
They all climbed into the car, which was no easy
task, even for a car as large as the limo.
Once underway, one of the poor fellows says,
"Sir, you are too kind.
Thank you for taking all of us with you."
The lawyer replied, "No problem,
the grass at my home is almost a foot tall."
Examination
Sardar Gurbachan Singh is appearing for his University final examination which consists of Y/N type questions. He takes his seat in the examination hall, stares at the question paper for five minutes, and then in a fit of inspiration takes his wallet out, removes a coin and starts tossing the coin and marking the answer sheet - Y for Heads and N for Tails. Within half an hour he is all done whereas the rest of the class is sweating it out. During the last few minutes, he is seen desperately throwing the coin, swearing and sweating. The invigilator, alarmed, approaches him and asksdecided to ask each applicant man answered without hesitation "The Romans killed him." The chief thanked him and he left. When the Italian man arrived for his interview, the chief asked the same question. He replied "Jesus was killed by the Jews." Again, the chief thanked the man who then left. Finally the Sardarji arrived for his interview, he was asked the same question. He thought for a long time, before saying, "Could I have some time to think about it?" The chief said, "OK, but get back to me tomorrow." When the Sardarji arrived home, his wife asked "How did the interview go?". Pat came the reply, "Great, I got the job, and I'm already investigating a murder.
Percentage
An Indian politician went to the US to visit his counterpart. When the senator invited him home for dinner, the minister was very impressed by the lavish mansion, grounds and the costly furnishings. He asked "How can you afford all this on a meagre senator's salary?" The senator smiled knowingly and took him to the window. "Can you see the river?" "Yes" "Can you see the bridge over it?" "Of course", said the minister. "10 percent", said the senator smugly. Some time later, he had occasion to pay a return visit. The Indian minister lavished all hospitality on him. When they came to his house, the American was stunned by the huge palace the minister had built, glittering with precious art, hundreds of servants etc. etc. "How can you possibly afford this, on a salary in RS?', he asked. The minister called him to the window. "See the river over there?" "Sure", cried the senator. "Can you see the bridge over it?" The senator looked, was confused, peered closely and said - "No, I don't see any bridge." "100 percent", said the minister !!
Sardar and the barber
Once a Sardarji was travelling on a train. He felt sleepy so he gave the guy sitting opposite him on the train 20 rupees to wake him up when the station arrived. This guy was a barber, and he felt that for 20 rupees , the Sardarji deserved more service. So, when the Sardarji fell asleep, the barber quietly shaved off his beard. When the station arrived, the Sardarji was woken up, and he went home. Reaching home, he went to wash his face, and suddenly screamed when he saw the mirror said his wife " What's the matter?" Replied he "The cheat on the train has taken my 20 rupees and woken up someone else"
Sardar's and Jurassic Park
This Sardarji goes to the see Jurassic Park and when the Dinosaurs start approaching he is cowering in his seat when his friend asks him "kyon Sardarji, kya baat hai? Dar kyon lag raha hai cinema hi to hai" (What Sardarji? Are you afraid of the cinema?). Sardarji replies "Aadmi hoon aur akkal hai, pata hai ki cinema hai lekin voh to janwar hai, usko kya pata "( I am an intelligent(?) man, I know it is a movie, but does that animal know?)
Sardar and the race
Once, a Hindu, a Sardar and an American were travelling in an aeroplane. Suddenly, something went wrong and the engines stalled. They had no parachutes with them. So all the three of them decided to risk their lives and jump out of their planes. First, the Sardar jumped out. He removed his turban, used it as a parachute and jumped. Using the turban he slowly floated down. Then the Hindu removed his dhoti and jumped out. Again his dhoti acted as a parachute and he also floated down gently. Seeing this, the American removed his shirt and pant and jumped out. Unfortunately, they did not do well as a parachute and he began to fall rapidly from the plane to the ground. He passed by the Hindu who said - " May Bhagwan help you". Then he passed the Sardar. The Sardar looked at the American zooming past him and was puzzled. So he said - "I see! You want a race! Let us see who is faster" Saying so, he let go off his turban.
what is going on. "Oye, I finished the exam in half and
hour". "But yaar", he says, "I am rechecking my answers
and am not able to tally them with what I wrote."