To the tune of `The Ballad of Jed Clampett' (The Beverly Hillbillies).

I'll tell you a story about a warrior,
Gets lost in a closet, `cause he can't find the door.
He traveled to China to settle up an old score,
Knocked in a spring and he's human no more!
Cursed he is,
Black pig, P-Chan.

Well the next thing you know, ole Ryouga's Akane's pet.
He's happier now than he's ever been I bet.
`Cause he loves Akane and it gets ole Ranma mad,
And if Ranma smacks him, Akane clobbers him bad.
Hammers, that is,
Ranma will, see stars.

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Updated 30 Dec 01.