inside the decay is at it's worst


    and here
    sunken into a leather chair
    poor animal -- i feel sickened
    with all lights focussed on me (stop looking at me, i don't have the answers to your questions)
    don't really know what to say

    when their surroundings come crashing down (which
    everything does, today, yesterday or tomorrow!)
    they have to point their fat fingers
    their dirty fingers
    on me and i get all the guilt
    (yes, i was there, thus it's my fault)
    but was it ever my duty
    to make sure everything was put together?
    (you never listen to me)
   
    my tongue slides across my lips
    try to catch words but fail
    look down at my hands (chewed nails = sign of weak nerves)
    why? i ask myself
   
    i liked myself before
    i understood myself then
    (a tiny bit i still do)
    nowadays i just see howiRUNstraighttowardsmyundoing
   
    and here i sit
    and look on
    cheering on a little bit, an extra push so it will be quicker
   
    everyone else looks at me
    perhaps they wonder what's going on inside my head
    perhaps they don't care at all
    and just want to return to the way it was
   
    but what was is gone now
    and it's too late now



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