From within helicopter
There's a target where to land
The dune may not be big
But we can see it in the sand

Or maybe it's the other way
It wouldn't be a shock
Perhaps it could use cleaning--
Does it hurt you when you walk?

I'm the piper in town
Shove away that debris
Help you kick your knees up
With a "Chim-chim-chiree"

I'll wipe more than just the windshield
Find a poop deck to swab
I'm ever glad to service
'Cause it's all part of the job

The point that I am making
Is that I can see your fold
Would you like a pair of slippers
For that toe out in the cold?

It is smaller than a camel's
Irregardless what it's called
Forgive a man for staring
But a cloth ain't quite a wall

And the reason it's attractive
Is a simple rationale
A man wants best for baby and
Can now inspect your birth canal

Pretend you are a storm drain
And I am gazing up it
Looks like such a frontal wedgie
I could play you like a Muppet

I'm impressed that they stay on
And aren't bursting at the seams
And I imagine that they'd get you off
If they didn't rub against your spleen

Again, I don't mean to offend
I'm just saying what I see
Your pants might be too tight for you
But surely not for me

When describing how you look
I could use the word "abut"
When we talk about your Mounds
I hope you feel like a nut

If you'll provide the lips
I'll show you how they kiss in France
And if you'll remove that shield
I'll show you how to wield a lance

I'll skip the blatant reference of
Your grill and my salami
Diddy must get jealous
When they call you "Puff Mommy"

How can you get those off?
That's what I find bizarre:
Those pockets are so small--
Where do you keep the crowbar?