- Have you seen any horror movies lately? The virgins are usually the last ones standing. It's been proven in many movies that the more pure, and virginal you are, the better your survival rate.. And, if all else fails, please remember to use protection....

 - We were right about the cheese!!! - On Val and Andrew's wedding night, cheese played a bigger role in the night than anything else.

 Rumor has it that Valerie (Delajour) is Simone's mother.

Leo and Lauren have more in common than just a common love of Italy...why else would he promote her to CO-owner?

- The Activities Director and the Funeral Director are conducting an affair, how twisted is THAT?  Meanwhile the Mayor remains married to her work....

The Gangsta blang wants to be an entrepreneur, but sadly the town is ever closed to him and his antics.

 - The secret agent names their suspects in their first missive to the town....

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 - Cheese must have miraculous aphrodisiac qualities.  Why else would a bookshop owner install a cheese bar?  Is that the perfume of love? or the stink of gorgonzola?  Visit the Book Nook and judge for yourselves.

 - There's a new Axis Alliance, only this one is in Eden Falls!

  - Earlier this week the Mayor was interviewed by Project Frog staff.  Rrribbit!

 - - Vanessa was the president and first member of the Amber Revolution

 - Marie Marioo intends to open a toy shop. 

 - Aimee and Heimi are now officially an item, and will be running the Wh0res shop for the next couple of weeks.

 - Isabelle left Leo for some Italian, who is in Italy (odd that).

 - Leo's folks are stranded on a desert island where they meet up with Gilligan at the whole crew, and since that stupid show never ends they'll be on there for a long time...

 - Simone will be seen in the next issue of Playboy and become a popular play boy Bunny.

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- Where have all the new mole games gone?  Are all the Mole-hosts in ORG on vacation?  All the games on the indexes seem to be either already started,  or have been cancelled...  If anyone can find me a Mole game that is accepting applications, you'll get your name in next week's paper ;)

- Cheju Do supporters should not lose hope, it is possible the host might see fit to reconsider his decision to cancel sometime soon.... Given the amount of support coming out of the woodwork for the Cheju Do staff, it is now clear to everyone that the Amber Revolution had no idea what they were talking about.

- The "flappable one" isn't really as dumb as she makes out... In odd moments, she has been known to admit it is all an act.

- More than one person is trying to trace more than one local identities who have disappeared off the scene now that CBS Survivor: Pearl Islands is actually filming.....if SB really did make the cut, good luck to him.

- Bryn was accepted into the upcoming season of The Real World as the typecast ho, but she was rejected from Eden Falls.

- Alvin is Kevin (Editor's note:  Kevin who?)

- The Amber Revolution has been cancelled because it sucks and the only one in it still is Alvin.  Other sources report that Alvin says it was all Nick's doing, and that Alvin himself has left the Amber Revolution.....

- Random hermaphrodites, namely ones named Sill, have been approaching young men for 'sex'. :-/

- Simone will be elected President of the World. (Editor's note: Wow thanks, but when, and do I get a corner office with a view?)

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- Survivornet won the ultimate episode of the week award at E2 gaming, against fierce competition from Redux Umzimkulu. Congratulations to these two, and the other four winners of the Episode of the Week award in season 1. Season two kicked off to a strong start, with Survivor Central's Survivor: Tonga clinching the first award.

- Amber had nothing to do with the Amber Revolution.

- Juanita had EVERYTHING to do with the Juanita Revolution though...What about the chill'ren?

- An unkind chipmunk has been creating havoc in ORG, by creating and publishing defamatory remarks about some of our Hosts. There is an obvious reason for this, and it is plain old jealousy. Because "Alvin" isn't respected, he chooses to waste his energy in slamming the people around him who actually can make something of themselves.

- The word is out. The "gangsta blang" has a cameltoe.

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- A certain "flappable" ORG Identity has been receiving crank phone calls in the middle of the night. Further I hear that the culprits are blaming another ORG Identity who happens to live in the Great Southern Land.

- Where did Travis go? The word is he is at "Summer Camp" and will be back in the Fall. This one will believe it when this one sees him. How many "Summer" camps start in May anyway?

- Nineteen people applied for Eden Falls residency in the first 24 hours.

- Will there be an ORG Convention in NY next Summer? ORGNY2004 here I come. (please note there IS an "N" in that name).

Tell us what you know. Write to us soon at [email protected] .