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| Untitled He was supposed to be tough. Sarcastic. Impenetrable. The one with all the answers to all the world's questions. He wouldn't let anyone get close to him and no one was going to try. It was him against the world and he seemed to like it that way. I was attracted to him the moment I saw him. His face held no smile when we first looked at each other but in his eyes I saw it. I saw him. * * * * "I need to use your phone." My eyes widened slightly. "Sure. What's wrong?" "My mother is beating up on Nathaniel." We walked in to the house to my surprised mother. "It's in there, on the hook, in the kitchen." "Thanks." My mother sat up straight in her chair and looked at me. "What's going on?" She asked quietly. "His mother's beating up on his brother." "Oh." "Is it all right if he uses the phone?" She seemed to answer that too quickly. "Sure. I don't mind." "All right..." I left and went into the hallway to wait. "...throwing knives and slapping him around. 307 Devon Drive. Thanks." I turned around. He had hung up the phone, but did not move afterwards. His hand was unmoving, still placed lightly on top. "Gabriel?" He looked at me, becoming animated again and walked by me out of the house. I followed him and asked quietly, "Are they coming?" He answered without turning around, "Yes. * * * * He was beautiful, at least in my opinion. To everyone else he was a jerk, someone who tried to be cool. And maybe he did try, and maybe he was a jerk, but he was my jerk. For a while anyway. At times I would sit at the window and watch for him. The familar creaking of the glass door opening and then the slam of it closing. My heart would jump, my stomach flipping, all from that sound. Then I would see him walking and I would hope it would be to me, which it normally was, though not for the reasons I wanted, I was still happy. The time I was with him, my body was on constant alert; for the slightest touch of his hand an the looks he would give me. He never acted on them; asking me out and then ignoring me for a week afterwards. But when he did pay attention to me, I was in bliss for those few moments. He affected me in such a way...but also hurt me in so many more. Though I still loved him. * * * * "Gabriel you son of a bitch! Don't think about coming back here tonight!" I looked to him and saw the tough exterior he projected to everyone, then I saw underneath where the hurt, sadness and anger lay, even as he yelled back to his mother. "Bitch." He murmured after she closed the door. We were both silent. I sat at the bottom of the yard, looking up at him as he paced, wondering what to do. He sat down also after a few minutes and put his head in his hands. It was silent for a few moments, then the sound of a car coming down the street was heard. The police car was first followed by a blue truck afterwards that stopped in front of his house. An old man stepped out, 60 - 65 I'd say, and walked towards the door. Grabriel's mother stepped out, they talked and pointed towards Grabiel. Afterwards the cop went in with his mother and the man, his grandfather, walked over. Gabriel stood up and began to back away as his grandfather came closer. "What do you think you're doing? Can't you see the trouble you're causing your mother?" "She was beating up on Nate. What am I supposed to do?!" "Stop you're lying!" "I'm not lying!" He looked over at me. "Can I run into the house if he gets any closer?" I nodded my head but kept my eyes on his grandfather. "Boy- when I catch up with you, I'll beat you senseless." My eyes widened in shock and I looked to Gabriel. I could see it in his eyes; he was nervous. "I'd like to see you try and run." * * * * He was always treated differently from his brother and sister; yelled at more, held accountable more. Just treated like dirt. I often wonder now if thats why he went out with all the girls he did, because of the way his mother treated him. I also wonder why he would ask me out, then forget about it, meanwhile go out with eight or nine other girls. Was I the fallback? Did he really like me and just didn't know how to say it? Or did he enjoy playing with my emotions? Either way I hold onto that thought; that he liked me. Maybe even loved me... * * * * My heart was being ripped out. I had never seen him cry before, at least not like this. It took all my strength not to stand up and comofrt him; I didn'tknow if he wanted me to. The door opened and closed. I turned to see his brother, Nate, walking with his sister, Amanda. His eyes were red rimmed and he looked scared as he walked with Amanda looking worried. "Gabriel..." "Why didn't you tell him? Huh? Why? Why didn't you say anything?!" "Because I was scared! I didn't want them to take us away!" Nate yelled back. "Jes...God!" Gabriel yelled and turned away from them, his face red and full of tears. He looked up at the sky then to the ground, wiping his face clear before sitting at the end of the yard. Amanda walked over in front of him. "Why don't you give it up? You're just pissing mom off even more." "Shut up." He mumbled, along with a few other things, but one loud and clear came through; "You know what Mom does to Nate, Dad does to you." Amanda's face turned to stone. She went back over to Nate and they both walked back to the house. The cop came out of the house and Gabriel went over to talk with him. It was brief and he returned. We were both quiet; him in anger, me in shock at what had been going on and hesitation at what to do. Looking at him, all I could feel was nothing but hatred towards his mother and love towards him. I wanted to wrap my arms around him and tell him it was okay, that I was there for him. "I'm a rape child." I looked at him. "Did your mother tell you th-" "Yeah," he answered, "she told me about two years ago." I was silent. That was wrong; to tell your child that. Out of spite it sounded like also. I hated his mother. * * * * "So now what?" "I'm leaving. To go live with my real dad." My eyes stayed locked on my feet. "When?" "Today. Sometime, I'm not sure. My mom was packing some stuff when I left to come over here." "I'm sorry- about what's happened." He shrugged his shoulders. Neither of us looked at each other. "Will you miss me?" My eyes slowly drifted from my shoes to stare straight ahead. "I- uh...heh,..." Tell him! "Yes." I looked at him. "Yes, I will miss you." His eyes closed and the shield fell away, his shell, showing his weaker side - the side no one was allowed to see. One tear escaped down his face then quickly disappeared. I reached over and took hold of his hand, intertwining my fingers with his. He opened his eyes and looked down at them; he didn't move. And we sat. |
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