So we called everybody in the Toronto media and told them what we were doing.
I was going to tape myself to a post again.  On the corner of Younge and Dundas at 1:00.
I doubted anybody would show up, but it was fun to try.
Derek made some flyers that I would hand out from the post.  They said "Watch my show please, I worked really hard on it."
I think that is what they said.

If you ever tape yourself to a post, make sure that you securely fasten your legs.  If you don't, then all the pressure from your body weight is placed directly on your ribs, and you can't breathe.  That happened.  We didn't realize that we had to tape the legs until after we had run out of tape.  We only had a small amount left.  It wasn't enough.

Suddenly these photographers and news camera's started showing up.  Derek pulled the ladder out from under my feet.  I couldn't breathe.  I was in extreme pain.   The CTV cameraman jumped up on the small ladder that had been under my feet.  He wanted a better angle.  I was trying to say, give me my ladder back I can't breathe!  My ribs felt like they were about to snap.  All my weight (And that's a lot)  was bearing down onto one strip of tape that crossed right over my ribs.

I hung there for about ten minutes, in pain.  I tried talking to a woman from CTV, a reporter, damn I forgot her name....  Anyway she interviewed me, I told her I was in pain, she laughed....  I asked the cameraman for my ladder back, I wanted him to shove it under my feet.... he laughed.  I yelled at Derek to get some more tape, that I was in trouble.  He tried to help, but neither of us really knew how to fix the situation.  We had run out of tape.  There were cameras everywhere.  People had shown up!

One of the photographer guys was crazy...  He was a complete moron.  He obviously didn't want to be there, but had to go because his assignment editor told him to.  See the CTV television camera operator had handed me a microphone, which I was holding.  But this pissed off the other photographer.  "Is he gonna hold that god damned microphone all day!"  This guy was freaking, the photographer.  At one point Derek went to shove the ladder back under my feet because I couldn't breathe.  This angry photographer yelled at Derek!  "Get rid of the fucking ladder!"  He yelled that at Derek... Insanity!

So after about half an hour of pain and insanity I crawled down.  The day was still far from over because tonight I was on Open Mike.

They sent a guy named James to pick me up at the hotel.  He was driving a Ford Taurus.  In afterthought, I bet the guys name wasn't really James... they just call him James so that you feel more like your in a limo. "To the show James!"
James was cool.  Everyone down at the show was actually very friendly.

I got to the place feeling a bit nervous.  I was a bit nervous about meeting Mike.  I was probably nervous because I watch the show.  At first I watched it out of curiosity.  But I actually liked the show a lot and I found Mike Bullard really funny.  That's why I was a bit nervous about meeting him.
He was in his make-up chair, we talked for a few minutes about stand-up comedy, about our shows, about being on The Comedy Network, etc... etc...

Then he ran off to get ready for his show.

I really want to thank all the people from this web site who came down to see it.  Many of you brought signs!  Many of you wore costumes!  It was crazy...  I think it was kind of weird for the Open Mike people because there was a lot of you people there to support us.  The head of The Comedy Network was also there, so it made The Tom Green Show look pretty good to have that kind of support.  I just want to say to anyone who showed up, it was very much appreciated.  It was fun.  We all had fun together.  I liked having fun with all of you, and I hope you all enjoyed having fun with me.

If you didn't see the show that night it went like this.  I walked out and covered myself with milk while Mike Bullard filmed me.  Then we went to a commercial, came back, he made fun of me, and then we rolled a clip.  I think it went pretty well.  After that I sat in the chair while two other stand-up comedians came out and did their thing.  There was a slight feeling in the room that the stand-up comediennes didn't really understand the milk joke...  A very subtle feeling that perhaps stand-up comedians don't really dig "milk-in-face" comedy.  But I like putting milk on my face.

After the show Mike hung out with us for a bit.  He's a real funny guy, very nice, and it seemed like he thought the milk bit was cool.  Thanks Mike, and anytime you want I would love to put milk on my face on your show...  Or perhaps we could use another liquid next time.
 

And that was about it for the day.

See ya tomorrow,

Tom