I've completely ripped this form off from Fuad.
VITAL STATS:
Handle: Disgruntled Ninja
Secondary Handle: CarbonBoy
Earthly Pseudonym: kyle t.
Other Things People Call Me: "Commodore," "Hey, you, get back here, you did not pay for that"
Height: 6'2"
Weight: Slightly less than a height of 6'2" suggests.
Hair: Often greasy
Eyes: Four
Smoke?: Not anymore
Eat meat?: Everything but organs
Wear Leather?: On my feet, accompanied by cold steel
Sex?: Advisably dangerous and messy.
Date of Birth: 2*27*77 (I do have a wishlist at amazon.com, hint)
Hometown: Arlington Heights, Illinois, US of A
Current Residence: Picturesque Trenton, New Jersey
Current Employment: Staging Graphics, Inc.
Best Job Ever: Video Store (every customer a regular; got paid to sit and watch movies), Six Flags Great Adventure (caricature artist; got paid to make fun of people)
Worst Job Ever: Temping at Pierce Leahy... 14 hours a day of data entry. Fired for attending a funeral instead of going to work.
Education: D+ average
High School Attended: John Hersey High School, Class of '95... and '96
College Attended: Everything I needed to learn in College I learned in my fifth year of high school
Preferred method of suicide: Mass, in Cult ritual
Last good book read: "Our Dumb Century" by the publishers of The Onion, "Gates of Eden" by Ethan Coen, the entire "Captain Underpants" series by Dav Pilkey
Favorite Listening Material: They Might Be Giants, The Kinks, The Muffs, Tenacious D, Nirvana, The Monkees, The Misfits, L7, Mono Puff, Talking Heads, R. Crumb and his Cheap Suit Serenaders, Combustible Edison, Neutral Milk Hotel, Tom Jones, Foo Fighters, Veruca Salt, Beastie Boys, Me First and the Gimme Gimmes, Wesley Willis, "Weird Al" Yankovic, Aimee Mann, Olivia Tremor Control, Liz Phair, Apples in Stereo, Nina Simone, Sleater-Kinney, anything on the "O Brother, Where Art Thou?" soundtrack, Pearl Jam, The Dust Brothers, The Mystic Knights of the Oingo Boingo, Thoth
Favorite filmmakers: Joel & Ethan Coen, David Fincher, Todd Solondz, John Waters, Tim Burton, Joe Dante, Dario Argento, Peter Jackson, David Cronenberg, Woody Allen, Roman Polanski, David Lynch, Robert Rodriguez, Tex Avery, Stanley Kubrick, Terry Gilliam, Herschell Gordon Lewis, Russ Meyer, Paul Bartel, John Carpenter, Clive Barker, Danny DeVito, Wes Anderson, Lloyd Kaufman, Mark Borchardt
Filmmakers who I liked before but recently made crappy movies: Gus Van Sant, Barry Sonnenfeld (may stray from the dark side, Big Trouble), Sam Raimi (may stray from the dark side, Spiderman), George Lucas
Preferred weather: Grey skies, Grey rain, Grey temperatures
Political causes supported: Anything in support of consumers. Anything in support of the rights of gays and lesbians. Anything in support of the rights of women. Anything that is not a proponent of hate or ignorance. Anything that won't provoke me to move to Canada.
Favorite mixed drink: Gin & Tonic, White Russian, Cosmopolitan
Favorite Beer: Goose Island, Samuel Adams, Bass Ale, Guinness
Favorite cigarette: Parliaments in a box
Favorite Ghostbuster: Ray Stantz
Favorite Celebrity Suicide: Bud Dwyer's
Favorite "Brady Bunch": The ones where they go to Hawaii and Greg hits his head on a rock and the rest of the kids are kidnapped by Vincent Price, whom they all forgive in the end
Favorite television show ever: "The Simpsons," "TV Nation," "M*A*S*H," "Futurama," "All in the Family," "Malcolm in the Middle," "Mr Show," "Tenacious D"
Favorite Food: Chili
Favorite Soft Drink: Mountain Dew, the beverage of the gods; Dr. Pepper ain't so bad either
Favorite Smell: a rat
Favorite movies: Citizen Kane, Brazil, Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb, Blood Simple, Raising Arizona, Miller's Crossing, Barton Fink, The Hudsucker Proxy, Fargo, The Big Lebowski, O Brother, Where Art Thou?, Fight Club, M*A*S*H, The Graduate, Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, The Day the Earth Stood Still, The Blues Brothers, Gremlins, The Burbs, Matinee, The Player, 12 Monkeys, Hard Eight, Magnolia, Boogie Nights, Goldfinger, Back to the Future, Who Framed Roger Rabbit, Death Becomes Her, The War of the Roses, Toy Story, Babe, The Usual Suspects, Memento, The Adventures of Baron Munchausen, Tim Burton's The Nightmare Before Christmas, North by Northwest, Psycho, His Girl Friday, Meet John Doe, The Evil Dead, Evil Dead 2: Dead by Dawn, Monty Python and the Holy Grail, American Movie, Close Encounters of the Third Kind, Pink Flamingos, Female Trouble, Desperate Living, Polyester, The Rocky Horror Picture Show, Shock Treatment, Pink Floyd: The Wall, The Road to Wellville, Wayne's World, Ferris Bueller's Day Off, Ghostbusters, Swimming With Sharks, Ed Wood, Dunston Checks In, 2001: A Space Odyssey, Jaws, Raiders of the Lost Ark, UHF, Kids in the Hall: Brain Candy and about 1000 others
Worst Movies I've Ever Seen: Fled, Ghostbusters II, What Dreams May Come, Pearl Harbor
Favorite singer: Leonard Nimoy
Favorite guitarist: Jimi Hendrix
Favorite bassist: Brian Gaynor
Favorite drummer: Jon "Bermuda" Schwartz
Favorite Drummond: Willis
Favorite mouthwash: Cool Mint Listerine
Favorite cereal ever: Reese's Peanut Butter Puffs
Second-favorite cereal ever: (tie) Crispy Critters, Ghostbusters
Favorite superhero: The Tick, Captain Underpants
Favorite Comic Book: Bone
Favorite American city: San Francisco, New Orleans
Favorite actor ever: Peter Sellers, Cary Grant
Favorite living actor: (tie) Tim Robbins, Eddie Deezen, Johnny Depp, Edward Norton, Brad Pitt, Kevin Spacey
Favorite actress ever: Barbara Stanwyk
Favorite living actress: Kate Winslet, Judy Davis
Favorite ice cream: Spumoni
Favorite "Sesame Street" human: Gordon
Favorite "Sesame Street" muppets: The purple two-headed one that always argued with him self, the aliens with the wobbly mouths who said "Yupyupyupyupyupyupyup, uh-huh, uh-huh...."
The thing I like best is: Movies, A-1 sauce
The thing I like least is: Ignorance, twisted morons who are under the deranged impression that letterboxed movies are "censorship" and "an assault on the artistic integrity of cinema" and that "all true movie lovers abhore this practice" while maintaining that the pan & scan version is a film's "original" format. Get a load of this moron...
If I could go back and live in a previous decade than this one: I'd live in the 60's, because I could pick up some original Mars Attacks! cards, Beatles collectibles and Monkees items. Plus, it was all peace and love and stuff and that rules.
If I could be any animal, I'd be a(n): gay bee
Favorite Monkee: Peter Tork, because he's subtlely funny.
Second Favorite Monkee: Mike Nesmith, because his mom invented white-out
