Today I learned what a hernia is�
Anyway, I am thinking of hiring a clown for my,
�Birthday party�. So then, when he jumps out from the couch
and yells, �surprise!� my friends and I can all jump out the
ceiling vents with our air rifles and buckets of red paint and yell,
�SURPRISE!!!!!� and unleash all hell.
Speaking of unleashing all hell, I�m constantly telling my cat to
stay off my bed, but I get the feeling he doesn�t understand a word
I�m saying�since he�s a cat and all. But still, he could show some respect.
So one day I decided to get him off my bed�permanently.
It was simple really. All I needed was a sledgehammer,
a few buckets of purple dye, a couple hundred golf balls,
a ladder, a rubber chicken and a few PCV pipes.
I think it worked, considering I don�t have a cat anymore�or a rubber chicken.
-Omar Fannywampus