Wishes and Lies

Sometimes, when I'm lying in bed at night,
And the sirens are wailing against the darkness,
I have wished my own eternal silence.
To be alone in an eternal emptiness,
To know no feeling or emotion;
No love, no hate, anger, or envy,
To diffuse friendships with the delicacy
Required in walking on teacups.
There, in my own unending black,
I would involve myself in me,
Explore my own person and try the
Greatest mystery of all: Who is me?
And as I am thinking about my void,
The moon manages to break free
Of the smoky tendrils of passed clouds.
It seems to turn to my window fully
And with the blinking aid of the stars,
Shine on my dull eyes and listless body.
As the pale light is absorbed by myself,
I see the significance of wishes and lies;
Realizing that I have not wanted
An inky black escape, not wanted to be left
Alone, not wanted to be without friends-
I only wish to be understood.