{"Couldn't Stand the Weather" by Stevie Ray Vaughn and Double Trouble plays over the speakers, as Toshiro Kenzake and "Gunslinger" Glenn Turner make their way to ringside, in black spandex pants and white leather trim, and white leather trenchoats ... as they reach the ring, Toshiro politely "asks" the ringside personnel for a pair of mics, handing one to Glenn as they slide into the ring.} We are back, and we are ready to go with the World Tag Team Title match...and the Weapons of Last Resort are here and they are ready to rumble. No, Ready 2 Rumble are another team entirely. I just don't get what the fans see in these guys...they're a complete mismatch. the David and Goliath concept has been a strong one for many years, and a dangerous one for Frozen hell tonight! [Turner] Evenin', folks, and welcome to the next stop on the Danger To Ourselves and Others Tour ... now, in a couple o'minutes, Bonham's gonna start rolling in his grave again ... but before that happens, I thought a few introductions were in order, formal-like. Frozen Hell, the man you see standin' next to me -- the tall one, with the beard, yeah that one -- this man is Toshiro Kenzake, DK to his friends, or people with teeth left, which won't be you after tonight. And I can only assume that the guy that DIDN'T spend 15 minutes against the Gunslinger last Lords of the Ring is Mr. Watkins, unless of course Brad's the blonde in the dress, in which case I'm older than I thought I was. I point this out merely because it seems like we've had the darndest time meeting you guys face-to-face, two-on-two lately. See, I've had the chance to get up close and hostile with Torvald Reikkersen, so I know you're honest about bringing the fight when it's one-on-one ... and judging from your name alone, "Bad" Brad, you're at least honest about your acting ability ... so I'm having trouble figuring out what happened to all that honesty back at Hot Summer Nights ... I KNOW we walked in with the title belts, because normally big gold belts are a fashion don't ... I KNOW your names were on the contract, because it took forever for the lawyer types to spell "Reikkersen" ... and I KNOW we didn't see you in the ring against us, because I'm sure I would've remembered big DK and I pounding out our favorite karaoke numbers on your skulls ... but what I DON'T know is how YOU jokers ended up with OUR belts, instead of BOC or heck, even Siouxnami. You got an answer, Tosh? {Glenn tosses the mic to Kenzake} [Kenzake] It is simple. They duck us, and then they play tricks. Others do the work, then they sneak along. And no-one tries to stop them. That changes tonight, Frozen Hell. Tonight, WE stop you! {Toshiro tosses the mic back to Glenn} [Turner] {nods} Good answer ... now, I'd just like to say we're not ones to hold grudges ... I'd LIKE to say that, but I'd be lying like a Carolina congressman if I did. So tonight, we're dropping the punishment we had waiting for you at 'Nights, with interest ... as far as the belts go, you're welcome to 'em -- you want out, just head on back and let the ref count 10, and we won't shed a tear. But whether or not you stay the champs, you won't stay out of our reach ... [Kenzake] {leaning over} and you WON'T STAY IN ONE PIECE!! {Turner throws the mic away as they hit their corner} And some strong words... Empty words.. ...from the tag team champions. <> OK, who was the cheap bastard that forgot to pay their electric bill?!? It's not like the Seminoles aren't making money... Watch your mouth, Byron. I don't understand... [The video wall lights up with a picture of Torvald Reikkersen] VO - what do you get when you start with the toughest Interpol Agent around ... OK, NOW I understand. Shut up, the previews are my favorite part. Where's my popcorn? [Split and add a picture of Brad Watkins] VO - add a bad guy with a rep for bending the rules ... [Zoom out until their whole bodies are in the shot] VO - Chain them together at the ankles ... [The zoom now reveals that to be so ...] VO - And pit them against a White Slavery ring with delusions of Roman grandeur? [Pan across a colisseum with stereotypical thugs, mafia style, only all dressed in togas. Watkins and Reikkersen are in the middle of the arena. Close in on a Godfather-type, who says: "Send in the Lions"] VO - All Frozen Hell breaks loose when Sven Broderick and Rock Badderman face ... [Appropriate pictures appear as the following items are listed] VO - lions, rampaging elephants, an army of ninja, and sixteen of the sexiest ex-White Slaves ever to go on a mission of revenge! Frozen Hell VI - White Slavery Wipeout, don't miss it! [During the above promo, Reikkersen and Watkins had made their way ringside with Frieda and the SBotW.] [ICE] Damn, we're good. [BBW] And not just at putting together the hottest movie franchise in Midnight Sun Video history. [ICE] No, we're also the greatest thing to hit the EWC since ... well, ever. Now, Brad since all that is true, why in the hell is EWC making us face [he turns to the ring where WoLR wait] that? It's their last resort to try to make us look bad, isn't it? They know that no matter how much we dominate the match, anyone who gets in the ring with the Singing Cowboy and Godzilla is going to look like an idiot, and that is something that the stars of Frozen Hell VI: White Slavery Wipeout can do without. [BBW] True, Torvald, but unfortunately we're contractually obligated to kick their butts. [ICE] So we are. We'll, let's get it over with, I've got dinner reservations for after the show, and I hate to keep Emeril waiting. [With that Frozen Hell begins their pre-match routine, heading to the ring] And that is a VERY deadly mistake...these guys are so full of themselves they actually see this match as a light workout!?!?!? It's the quiet confidence of a major motion picture superstar! Remember, wrestling is their side activity, much like when someone like Geena Davis tries out for the Olympic archery team. You mean they lose to superior athletes. It's not how they win or lose, it's how good they look doing it. And the Swedish Babe of the Week is looking DAMN good doing...whatever it is she does. It's a pity you could poke a hole in her brain and fill a radial tire. [Matthews] We spin the wheel....and it is.... CHRIS MONROE'S CHOICE!!! Oh dear god... YES!!!! Maybe we'll get a DECENT stip out of this.... [Matthews] This is a SEQUENTIAL MOVES MATCH!!!!! The match can only be won after a team executes the first four moves in sequence at some point in the match and only after they use the fifth move as their finisher! Referee Mason Crow will reveal the list of moves at ringside. This is a very odd choice of a match, ESPECIALLY for Chris Monroe. This is going to throw both teams off their game, I think. The first four moves are: Spinning back fist, falling knee to the back of the head, cobra clutch, and dropkick...that's not too unreasonable. Yeah, but look at the fifth move.. **CROWD POP** REVERSE SHOOTING STAR PRESS!!!?!?!?! And that has to be the biggest irony on the planet....Monroe apparently has completely screwed over the so-called "heels" in this match. Monroe apparently had that stip in case he rolled it in his match with Bill Curtis, but it's on this match instead. And Turner may have difficulty here..he's never tried the Reverse SSP to my knowledge, but there is no way in FROZEN HELL that either Reikkersen or Watkins is going to nail that move. I have to admit, things are looking a little dark here for the champs...bu..but they'll think of something. Reikkersen is a master of the game. And the "Icebreaker" talking to Frieda and...Monique, I think her name is...and he's sending them to the back. This is very unusual. Well, I'm thinking that if Frozen Hell are going down, they're going down fighting, and that Torvy didn't want the ladies anywhere near the carnage. **DING DING DING** The Weapons are removing their gear and GO AFTER FROZEN HELL FROM THE GET GO!!!!! Frozen Hell showing no fear of the champs, tho, as they're going toe to toe from word one. Yeah, Brad, go after that big doof, knee to the gut of Kensake, and that's one of the most feared knees in wrestling today!!! It's certainly one of the most feared kneepads, that's for sure. Watkins swings, Toshiro dodges the swing, TURNER WITH A DROPKICK THAT SENDS WATKINS OVER!!!! And good opponent switch in midstream by the Weapons. And now Big "DK" sends Reikkersen to the ropes and big boots him over the top!!!! And both members of Frozen Hell on the outside! I'm not saying the WoLR isn't a good team...you have to be good to be World Champion, unless your name is Ernie Grendel...but I think Frozen Hell has a plan, and they're being suckered in! And wait a minute, Kensake has Turner in a slingshot catapult...and sends Turner RIGHT INTO A SPRINGBOARD SPLASH ON BOTH FROZEN HELL MEMBERS!!!!! And the Weapons rolling right out of the gate on this one!!! But you know, the Weapons strengths may be their weaknesses as well. What happens when Turner misses that move, or when Kensake mistimes a double team and takes his own partner's head off!?! They may have been World Tag champs since they got here, but they've only been teaming for slightly longer. It looks like it's Watkins and Kensake starting, and Watkins is taking his sweet time getting into the ring right now. Watkins turns to yell at a fan, and Toshiro grabs him by the hair and pulls him back into the ring!!!! Watkins dangling parallel by his hair, and now Kensake slams him onto the mat center ring!!!! And Crow *wants* to get into the face of DK, like the fair referee that he is... Oh don't get me star... but like any man out there, is a bit intimidated by 7'2" of pissed off Nipponese fury. Do you have any idea how offensive you are at times!?!? Watkins trying to get up, and Kensake right off the bat with a spinning backfist, that's one down!! Karate kicks by "DK", and Watkins is backed into a corner. And "Bad" Brad is dazed right now. Watkins is a tough, tough mother, but he can't stand up against this for the entire match, he needs to get some offense going here. OOOOH, Kensake with a HARD knife edge chop, and now he whips Watkins out of the corner... Watkins with a reverse, and he charges in RIGHT INTO A CLAWHOLD BY KENSAKE!!!!! **** And Kensake tags in Turner, and Turner with an ATOMIC DROP WHILE HE'S STILL IN THE CLAWHOLD! And that HAD to hurt, cause Watkins had nowhere to go. Kensake lets go, and Turner dropkicks Watkins into the turnbuckles..and he bounces off and Turner with ANOTHER dropkick sending Watkins FLYING into his corner, and Watkins sits there dazed as Reikkersen tags himself in. And we've got a rematch from the last Lords of the Ring right now. And that was one of the best time limit draws I've ever seen, but Reikkersen really needs to slow the pace here if they have a chance of winning. Watkins took a beating in there. And "The Icebreaker" trying to do just that, he's VERY slow in engaging the "Gunslinger"... finally we've got a collar and elbow, and Reikkersen pulling Turner's hair to get him into a chinlock on the ground, and Torvald is trying to get the pace down to a crawl... and the fans may not like it, but that's partly the point. What are you insinuating? Frozen Hell *loves* their fans. They make them richer, you know. Turner managing to bull his way back to his feet, and sends Torvy to the ropes...Torvald drops Turner with a shoulder block. Reikkersen comes off the ropes, Turner falls flat once, then twice before getting up, and they criss cross once, and TURNER JUMPS INTO A FLYING ELBOWSMASH THAT KNOCKS TORVALD ON HIS BACKSIDE!!! And Turner nails a dropkick right on the mush of Torvy, and ANOTHER ONE! HA!! Torvald holds onto the ropes as Turner goes for it one too many times. That's the brainpower of the former World champ and current World Tag Team Champ. If he was that smart he wouldn't have gotten so close to Kensake, who YANKS HIM DOWN by the hair from outside...man the reach on him is uncanny. And Crow giving him the what for, and Toshiro just says "He pulled hair too!" Yeah, *THAT* makes it legal... Turner follows up with a legdrop, then ties up Reikkersen's legs as he tags Kensake, who steps over the ropes and hits a second rope elbowdrop on the prone Reikkersen. Kensake picks him up, goes for a vertical supl, NO, GOURDBUSTER, and now Kensake drops the knee, and that's two moves down. Kensake picks Reikkersen up, OOOOH, and Reikekrsen with a forearm to the netherregions. And he had to REALLY uppercut Kensake to get it done. Eurocut by Reikkersen, and Torvald makes a rolling tag to Watkins, who comes in running... Kensake falls backwards as Watkins connects the knee and stunguns Watkins on the top rope!!! Watkins dazed as Kensake gathers his wits and goes for a clothesline...and Watkins with a LOW KNEE RIGHT INTO KENSAKE'S GROIN!!!! That's two low blows by the World Tag Team Champions. And the ref didn't see either, you have to know the champs are going to try and get any and every advantage they can. Watkins with a spinning back fist...barely... and now a kneesmash brings Kensake down onto his back. That loaded kneepad of Watkins doing the damage, and Watkins now with a big boot kick to Kensake to send him back to the enemy corner, and a tag to Reikkersen and now both individuals laying a stompdown on the 7'2" Kensake. And it doesn't matter how big you are, when you're on your ass, you look like any other loser. Credit has to go to Glenn Turner, he's not trying to break things up here, letting the referee try and do his job. Reikkersen dropping knees onto the right leg of Toshiro Kensake, trying to keep the big man grounded, classic "Icebreaker" offense. Reikkersen now rolling Kensake over, going for a Boston Crab, this isn't gonna win the match, but it'll wear him down, and a tag to Watkins. And Watkins comes in and drops a padded knee to the back of Kensake's head, and that's two moves down. Watkins laying some serious boots to the chest and leg of Kensake. Watkins now bending Kensake forward, and comes off the ropes and RAMS THAT PADDED KNEEPAD INTO THE BACK OF KENSAKE'S HEAD!!!!! And Toshiro Kensake is *dazed* in there. Watkins grabbing Kensake from behind and wrapping him in a cobra clutch, bulling him forward, and Reikkersen gets the slap tag. And that's three holds down in the span of under a minute, they're not wasting time tonight. No, they *WANT* this over as soon as possible, but they still have to hit a reverse shooting star press *SOMEHOW*. Reikkersen with a boot to Kensake's face, and now giving a big *WHOO* to the fans at ringside.. **** How can they boo these guys? They're international film stars!!! So's Jerry Lewis. Reikkersen laying more kicks into the leg of Kensake, now he goes for the Figure Fjord but KENSAKE KICKS OUT WITH AUTHORITY!!!!!! **** Kensake tries to stand as Reikkersen tries to get his bearings...but TURNER GRABS HIM FROM BEHIND AND LOCKS ON A COBRA CLUTCH!!!!!! Wait, he's not even the legal man!!! UN FOUL!!! The rules do not say that the legal man has to lock the hold, and now both sides have three of the moves necessary. Crow finally extricates Reikkersen out of the hold as Kensake gets to his feet, but he's limping pretty hard. Reikkersen charges Kensake, but Kensake has him in a headlock..and WATKINS ILLEGALLY KNEE CLIPPING HIM FROM BEHIND, and that draws Turner in. But Crow forcing him out, and now both men get on Kensake and hit a double vertical suplex on the big man before Watkins leaves. Things are not looking good for Toshiro Kensake at this moment, as Reikkersen calls for Watkins to put the knee up, and he rams Kensake's head right into the kneepad... AND IT DOESN'T HURT KENSAKE A BIT!!!! KENSAKE WITH A HARD CHOP to back up Reikkersen. But Reikkersen got the tag off before Kensake went to town, and now Watkins in with a low dropkick to Kensake's knee, and Kensake is down now. ANd they're one move away from winning it!!! One very HARD move for the non-high-flying Frozen Hell. Watkins now rolling out of the ring and dragging Kensake by his legs...and he takes Kensake's leg and whips it into the steel guardrail...and now Torvy distracting the referee as Watkins has a steel chair.. **** RIGHT ACROSS THE LEG OF KENSAKE!!! Where was the ref there??? Getting things settled in ring, that's what. That's what referee's do, you know. Watkins back in the ring, picking up Kensake as Torvald is looking towards the back for something, not sure what...Watkins has Kensake up and hits a belly to belly suplex, and that takes real strength. Watkins was a former linebacker out of Penn State, they grow them strong out here. Tag to Reikkersen, and the teamwork here is fluid. Both men pick him Kensake up and bodyslam him down, and now Reikkersen trying to get the Figure Fjord on again.. AND AGAIN KENSAKE KICKS HIM AWAY, and this time he went right into Watkins, who went right into the guardrail on the outside!!!! Kensake trying to get to his feet, but a lot has been taken out of the big man thus far. Kensake crawling for that tag, but Reikkersen runs across and forearms Turner off the ring apron! Reikkersen now grabs Kensake's head...AND KENSAKE WITH A LOW BLOW!!! AND WHAT'S SAUCE FOR THE GOOSE IS SAUCE FOR THE GANDER!!! Shut up, Cross, EWC does not stand for Emeril Wrestling Council!!! Whatever, Reikkersen is down on his face, and Kensake pulling Turner back up onto the apron, and he makes the tag!!!! **** And Turner walks OVER Reikkersen...DROPKICK TO THE FACE OF WATKINS, and he's out on the outside!!!! BOTH TEAMS HAVE FOUR OF THE MOVES DONE!!!! Turner with several chops across the chest of Reikkersen, and now a whip to the buckle and REIKKERSEN TUMBLES OVER..no, he lands, runs the apron, GOING UP TOP...OOOOH, TURNER DROPKICKS THE TOP ROPE, and REIKKERSEN CROTCHES HIMSELF!!! And Reikkersen needs to get himself righted in a hurry, Turner runs up the buckle and NAILS a kick right to the face of Torvald Reikkersen, and Torvald tumbles to the mat. Oh geez, this doesn't look good... And Turner up on the top rope, he's going for a moon....no.....no he's not........ REVERSE SST!!!!!! But Reikkersen moves out of the way, and both men are down in the middle of the ring. And here comes Frieda back to the ring...and she's carrying something. Reikkersen grabs Turner and hits a swedish legsweep as Watkins is up on the outside and on the...OH MY GOD!!! KENSAKE GRABS WATKINS BY THE WAIST AND SPINEBUSTERS HIM THROUGH THE TIMEKEEPERS TABLE!!!! That looked ugly.....what is Frieda....OH MY GOD, I LOVE IT!!!! Kensake on a bum leg, that was about all he could....OH NO!!!!! Oh yes, THAT was what Frieda was doing. She printed out a banner saying "Swinging Neckbreaker" and pasted it over the Reverse SST!!!! So now the fifth and final move is a swinging neckbreaker. Which is Torvald's finisher. THAT is a devious move by Reikkersen, and Crow is actually allowing it!!!!! And that's why Frozen Hell is box office gold, Reikkersen's a genius!!! Torvald now has Turner by the neck, this one could be history.....TURNER REVERSES!!!! TURNER HIT THE NECKBREAKER ON A REVERSAL!!!! Cover and one... A sllllow two......... and a slllooooowww.... THREE!!!! Crow stretched that as much as he could, but Reikkersen was OUT!!! NO!!! NO!!!! NO!!!! **** <<"Couldn't Stand the Weather" kicks in. This one's over, and the Weapons of Last Resort have regained the World Tag Team Titles on a BACKFIRED cheat attempt by Torvald Reikkersen! Well, he had to try it, there was no way they were going to hit a reverse SST, but somehow Turner cheated and managed to reverse it. And the Weapons are still the champs, Kensake is limping but happy, and Glenn Turner proved that Kensake isn't the only weapon in that tag team, improvising moves, pulling out the win. You have to know, however, that Frozen Hell will be back, they've got an automatic remat..OOF!!!! What the!?!?!? <> TR Parker is going nuts on Byron....Parker screaming "Don't you ever talk like that about her" - I think he heard the comments Byron made about his wife, and now Parker has got Byron out onto the concrete...PILEDRIVER onto the concrete, and Parker's not done!!! He slide a folded steel chair...and he's got Byron again....PILEDRIVER ONTO THE STEEL CHAIR!!! And officials are out here finally and they're pulling Parker back...man, I can't believe this...