<<"The House That Jack Built" by Metallica plays over the speakers.>>

<Cross>
Folks, Curtis Stone is on his way out here....but according to my sheet, this
isn't supposed to be his match.

<Byron>
Isaac, when are you going to learn how STAR power works?  The Power Supply
goes by one mantra...want....take....have.  It's as simple as that.  Now be
quiet and lets listen to excellence.

<<Stone enters the ring, the crowd is booing, the asssault on the
Wave Runners fresh in their minds>>

[Stone]
Mark, Mark, Mark ... now talk about your appropriate names ... and
your shower-pal Greg there ... listen up, surfer boys ... 

<<Chants of "RUN-NERS! RUN-NERS!" go up.>>


I know you're in the back right now, pushing your tongue around to make sure
your teeth are all there, and trying to figure out how many fingers 
the doc is holding up ... but I also know you'll get around to 
watching this on tape, with both of your shared IQ points back ... 
and I want to make DAMN sure you understand why this happened.

See, this isn't about the North American tag belts you punks cost us.
Jon and I, we had that tag title tourney in mind as a kind of light
workout. Sure, we might have run the table, but y'know, two-on-two's
not really our scene, so it's no big loss. And while we've got 
nothing against ol' Zach and Dan, we're not getting invited to their
Sunday dinners, either, so it's not about favors.

It's about respect, pure and simple. You got in the Power Supply's
face, Waverunners, and you needed to learn The Lesson: that whether
it's Nuclear Nick, just plain Jon, or yours truly, one thing remains
true: you NEVER screw with C-Jack's crew!

And ON the subject of warnings ... later tonight, there's going to be 
a C-Jack Attack of biblical proportions, on one Damien Omega ... and 
Damien, I'm going to show all these Florida fatheads that, though 
they may think you're some kind of wrestling god, next to the 
21st-century athlete come to Earth a few months early, you're nothing 
but a short hurdle in the way of my winning the gold. And there's only
one man that can stand in the way of that, only one man who can stop 
destiny from taking its natural course of North American champion, 
C-Jack Stone.

<<BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!>>

Now, the grapevine's been working overtime, and C-Jack happens to 
know the name of the man working in the striped shirt tonight. So,
Terry Magnum, these words are for you ... Terry, on the last Impact,
you saw a member of your honored fraternity, Mason Crow, work a match
with title implications ... and you saw him take a HORRIFIC beating at
the hands of the Waverunners, because he tried to restart a match
that the Waverunners did not want to continue, though they weren't
even involved. Now, did the our all-powerful commish fine the Runners?
Did he uphold Crow's courageous decision? Did he uphold the integrity
of this sport? HELL NO. 

I'm sure you get the message, Terry. The referee's decision 
apparently doesn't mean a damn to the folks upstairs, as long as 
those losers sitting beguiled in the aisles get their dosage of 
violence -- and it may just come at YOUR expense. Now, I'm not going
to stand here and point out that while you're one big fella, the 
Power Supply is THREE men at the peak of physique ... I'm not going 
to suggest that if C-Jack isn't the champ at the end of the night, 
that something BAD might happen ... I'm not going to say that if you 
play me wrong, my pals and I are going to drum the Chicken Run 
Blastorama over your head and shoulders, and leave you a broken pile 
of bruises ... all I'm saying is that when I nail the Hi-Jacker on 
Damien Omega, and your hand starts to hit the mat for the 1-2-3, that 
you might want to consider ... very, VERY hard ... that your family 
loves you very, VERY much.

So, in closing, I've got a pop quiz for ya ... MIRROR, MIRROR, ON THE
WALL -- TELL THE FANS WHO'LL WIN IT ALL!

{The Solotron dutifully flares up into a close-up of Stone}

["virtual" C-Jack]
Damien, before your night has even begun
you'll find the Power Supply has already won!

<<LOUD boos from the fans accompany the return of "The House that Jack Built"
to the speakers as Stone rolls out over the ropes>>

<Cross>
Oh, you HAVE to love this.  It's bad enough that the officials get abused out of
hand in wrestling in general...C-Jack just THREATENED an official?

<Byron>
And?  Your point?  Look, with the execption of Mason Crow...and even he's prone
to a mistake from time to time..

<Cross>
Oh, plea..

<Byron>
DON'T INTERRUPT ME!  Anyways, these referee's are *WORTHLESS*.  They miss pins,
they disqualify the wrong person...where was the referee when Parker hit that
triple flip?  That was obviously an illegal move intent to kill Chris Sim.

<Cross>
IT WAS A FALLS COUNT ANYWHERE MATCH!!! NOTHING was illegal.

<Byron>
Well, it should have been.  I'm here to say, right now, that "Prime Time" Jeremy
Byron, Wrestling's Newest #1 Bestseller, is available to put on the stripes and
show these yahoo's not only how to count to three, but how to take a hit and
STILL DO YOUR JOB!

<<"Ronnie" by Metallica plays over the speaker, and the boos continue>>

<Cross>
In any event, we've got a return match for the Cut 'n Shoot heritage title between
champion Ronnie Frown and challenger "Crazy" Jay Gillette.  

<Byron>
And let me point out something important here....Ronnie Frown is UNDEFEATED in EWC
competition, and has defended that title with verve and flair.

<Cross>
He's defended that title with a lot of help...he beat Titus Moongarden after Mikhail
Tzskova beat Moongarden to within an inch of his life, then stuck a foot on him. And
I don't think you can consider John Sliver to be worthy competition here.

<Byron>
A win is a win.  W in the column.  Winner's pay.  It's that simple.

<Cross>
With your career, Jeremy, I'm surprised you know what a "W" looks like.

<Byron>
Now see.

<Cross> *interrupting*
It looks like Mr. Frown has something to say, that explains why he broke tradition,
as the champ usually comes out second...

<<Ronnie raises the microphone to speak, then pauses as the fans
begin to preemptively boo him; he makes a resigned face, and lifts
the microphone overhead, pointed slightly forward, like a rock
musician letting the crowd sing for him. After a couple moments,
he lowers it back to speaking level.>>

[Ronnie Frown}
Thaaat's right ... I am Pavlov, and you are ALL MY DOGS!

<<He pauses for a moment to wait out further boos>>

[Ronnie]
I'm sure the yokel yakuza that run this outfit are VERY happy to
see this outSTANDing turnout tonight for Hardcore Homecoming ...
this teeming mass of impulse consumers who just HAD to be here in
person to project the one thought in their smooth cerebrums at
the top of their lungs ... I guess it's a little too much to ask
that there be a WORD attached to that howl, but ...

<<As if on cue, "RON-NIE SUCKS! RON-NIE SUCKS!>>

Even so, I can deduce from this garbled outpouring of sincere
emotion that you are somehow not happy to see me! {He pauses to
make an exaggeratedly hurt expression}. Well, let me tell you all
the sad facts of life -- if you're not happy to be here, you can
just get up and LEAVE, because while YOU all paid to get into this
building tonight, Ronnie Frown is GETTING paid to be here tonight,
and he is NOT going ANYWHERE!

BUT, you say, BUT we have one hope to cling to ... we can say the
glass is half full, that maybe, just maybe tonigh, Ronnie Frown
will get the *inhumanly* painful beating we're too chicken to give
him ourselves ... yeah, yeah, that's the ticket. THAT'S NOT GONNA
HAPPEN, PEOPLE!

For any other man in this shop, tonight is a night to dread -- the
chaos, the uncertainty, the dizzy spells from trying to watching
the roulette wheel turn ... but for Ronnie Frown, tonight is just
another slow Monday at the workplace. Since I laid claim to the
Go Hang Yourself Suicide King crown, I have {starts ticking off on
his fingers} had my arm wrenched out of its socket, I have had my
head split open, I have had my neck nearly fractured, I have been
gnawed on by a rabid idiot ... and I'm STILL here in this ring
tonight, and I am STILL the closest thing to a champion that has
gotten near that subliminal suggestion knot, and I am STILL the
one and only original FIVE MILLION MINUTE MAN of Summit Wrestling.


	<Cross> Hate to tell you, Ronnie, but the clock wasn't ticking
		when that match was restarted.

So those animal wranglers in back, you bring out that rabid idiot
one more time and I'll give him the Ronnie Frown prescription for
recovery -- about twenty shots in the stomach that don't use a
needle, and a Bitter Pill to swallow. And if he doesn't like that,
if that's not what all of you here are waiting to see -- GET USED
TO DISAPPOINTMENT!!!

<<Boos continue in general, but they turn to a pop when the opening chords
of "Bad to the Bone" play over the speakers>>

<Cross>
And the sound of the fans barking can mean only one thing..

<Byron>
They're in heat?  If so, that hot redhead in seat 22 can treat me like
a dog.  Hey honey, nice shirt, can I bury a bone in there!?!?!

<Cross>
YOu have got to be the most perverted color commentator in the business!

<Byron>
SECOND most perverted.

<Cross>
Lowe was never that bad.  No, I mean't "Crazy" Jay Gillette, and much to Ronnie
Frown's disappointment, those are HIS dogs in the audience.

<<Crowd starts to woof as Jay hits the ring, chain swinging, sending Frown scurrying.
He's also holding a rolled-up newspaper as he gets a mike from Alison and starts
to address the crowd>>

[CJG]
You know Ronnie, you and a lot of other people laugh at me a lot
'cause of this "dog" gimmick I use.  Well tonight, Ronnie, I ain't
gonna be playing the dog.....YOU ARE!  I'm gonna start by teaching
you a few nice little canine tricks like how to beg and rolling onto your
back and playing dead.  I'm sure I'll probably have to smack you
a few times with this...(holds up the newspaper)....until you get the
idea, but you're a bright little pup and by the end of the match, when 
it's time for you to fetch me my Cut'n'Shoot Heritage Title back, I'm
sure I'll be proud to call you the first graduate of the Jay Gillette 
Obedience Training Program.  So bring your sorry tail on out here, 
Ronnie, 'cause now we go to school.

<Cross>
And now they've got the wagon wheel out...the wagon wheel must be used for all
CnS defenses, but it's been altered slightly with wrestler's choices.  And it's.....


TR PARKER'S RULES.....it's a DOG COLLAR MATCH!!!!!!  A variation on the strap match
that Gillette lost the title in...wait a minute, I'm getting the rules of this 
match....the match must be won by pinfall or submission!  It is not touch the four
corners rules.

<Byron>
You know, I'm beginning to think that this entire evening is rigged.  Almost 
every match has had stips that favor yahoo's like Gillette.  And this wasn't even
his match.

<Cross>
The C of A got their match...and lost.

<Byron>
You ask Greg and Mark in the hospital who lost that match.

<Cross>
Frown is very slow to hook the dog collar up...unlike the strap match, they're connected
by the neck this time.  Finally, referee Ray Chapman gets the collar on, and Jay yanks
him forward right away into a spear, and off we go!  Fire fast right hands into the
face of Frown, now Gillette is up, yanks him up by the collar, CLOTHESLINE sends him
back down...Frown is up, ANOTHER clothesline.

<Byron>
Back him off, ref, Frown wasn't ready.

<Cross>
This isn't boxing, it's anything goes...Frown tries to roll to the outside...but
Gillette pulling him back in by the chain to the cheers of this crowd...Frown is
struggling, but Gillette has him back in...Frown with a wild swing..HEADBUTT by 
Jay, and Frown is down on the mat and a COVER..


ONE.......


TWO.....


THr..oooh, very close to an early pin.  Frown gets up, charging clothesline by Frown,
but Jay ducks.....

*CRACK*

AND JAY JUST SLAPPED THE TASTE OUT OF FROWN'S MOUTH, and FROWN JUST TUMBLED OVER
THE TOP ROPE!!

<Byron>
He can't do that!!! Come on, ref, DO something about that!

<Cross>
Jay wraps that chain around his arm and he's on the top rope, Frown trying to get
his bearings...Double axehandle from the top, and the chain is driven right into
the back of Ronnie Frown.  Now Gillette pulls Frown in by the chain and drives a
clubbing chained forearm across Frown's chest...and so far this match has been ALL
Jay Gillette.

<Byron>
Frown is dazed, he's trying to mount some offense here, but Jay keeps blocking him. No
fair!

<Cross>
No fair?!?!? NO FAIR!?!? Tell me how you got this job?

<Byron>
It's not what you know, it's who you...

<Cross> 
GILLETTE CLOTHESLINING FROWN ON THE OUTSIDE WITH THE CHAIN, and now he's being
thrown under the bottom rope, Gillette follows.  Jay Gillette now with boots to the
back of Frown.  Now he's got the chain, throws it into a ball on Frown's back..BIG 
LEGDROP RIGHT ONTO THE CHAIN!!! Frown's a hurtin.

<Byron>
And Frown is desperately reaching for the ropes, he needs to turn this around and soon,
or it's bye bye title.

<Cross>
But again, Gillette pulling Frown back towards him...Frown stumbles into Jay's arms..
STUN GUN onto the ropes.  Now Gillette sends Frown into the ropes....HIGH CROSS BODYBLOCK
for a cover..


We have one..


We have two..


No go, Frown kicks out.  Jay pulls him up, HARD knife edge backs Frown into the corner,
Jay launches him out....FROWN GOES OVER THE TURNBUCKLE TO THE OUTSIDE!!! Jay's charging
in....FROWN WRAPS UP THE CHAIN AND JUMPS, jerking Jay hard into the corner.  And that
was a desperation move by Ronnie Frown.

<Byron>
It was a smart move, Frown saw the opportunity to use Jay's energy and momentum against him,
and now Jay's down in the ring.

<Cross>
Ronnie's too dazed to capitalize right now, tho, and Jay ia getting to his feet.

<Byron>
Check it out, Cross...Frown just stole a bone from a fan!!!

<Cross>
That looks like a big PVC bone that a fan brought..it says "A Bone for my #1 Dog"...and
Jay's pulling Frown up onto the apron by the chain...and FROWN JUST CRACKED HIM OVER THE
HEAD WITH THE PVC BONE, and Jay Gillette is down in the ring!!!

<Byron>
Frown's not done yet, he's climbing to the top rope, and he's holding that bone
like a billy club...Elbowsmash across the throat of Jay Gillette with that bone!!!
Oh, and Frown's patented trash talk has begun.

<<Frown is heard saying ""See, they love you man!" as he shows him the bone before
hitting his face with it.  "This makes you feel like a million bucks, don't it?">>

<Cross>
Frown one of the most arrogant competitors in the business, and he's smashing that
bone across the stomach of Gillette.  Now he tosses the bone aside, and he's stomping
on the prone body of Gillette before picking him up and kneelifting him into the ropes.

<Byron>
And this is Frown's style of match..slow, methodical, make each hit count and let it 
be on target.

<Cross>
Frown picks up Gillette by the hair..palm thrust across the chin of Gillette. and now
a rake of the eyes by the Cut 'n Shoot Heritage champion, and I worry about the title
if that's the kind of heritage that that title is going to have...now he waistlocks
Gillette and hits a jumping inverted atomic drop.

<Byron>
And that dog's gonna be barking soprano for a while.

<Cross>
Frown grabs the chain and tosses Gillette over the top, and now he's hanging the Crazy
one by the chain.  Frown now grabs the ropes and slingshots himself onto Gillette on the
outside.  And now what's he doing?

<Byron>
He just grabbed the title "noose" from the ringside table..and he's tightening it around
Gillette's wrist and then sends him into the crowd...and pulls back, and he almost
yanked that arm out of Gillette's socket.

<Cross>
Gillette staggering towards the fans, and Frown yanks the chain backwards, driving
Gillette back first into the ring divider.  Now Frown hooks his face...BITTER PILL ON
THE CONCRETE!!!!  He got that reverse chinlock on over the divider and just pulled
him over.  Problem is, this isn't a falls count anywhere match, and Chapman is desperately
trying to get both men back in the ring.

<Byron> 
Frown finally obliges, rolling Gillette back in and sliding in behind him, and he rolls
onto Gillette for the cover..


we have one......


we have two.....


KICKOUT BY GILLETTE.  And Frown just wrapping that chain around his fist as Gillette
gets to his feet and nails him with it....wait a second, Gillette didn't drop!

<Byron>
What?  That was a chained fist to the face..

<<The fans start barking like mad>>

<Cross>
Gillette's got the hardest non-Samoan head in the business, and he's shaking off chain
shots to the face....and Gillette's barking at the moon!!!!

<Byron>
He didn't bark that off, though, Frown got smart and fired to the breadbasket that
time, and now Frown's got his arms hooked.....

<Cross>
Frown tried for the tiger driver but couldn't get him up...he tries again...BACKDROP
by Gillette and Gillette is still howling.  Frown is up..and Gillette fires a headbutt
on Frown..and another one..a series of headbutts and Frown's legs are wobbly..and Gillette
fires off one final bark before laying a headbutt that sends Frown *HARD* to the canvas.

<Byron>
Frown better find the momentum again here, I don't think i can take that freak holding
any title again, even if it is just a dirty old noose.

<Cross>
Gillette sends Frown to the ropes...Frown reverses, leapfrogs Gillette, Gillette rebounds
and leapfrogs Frown's backdrop attempt, and Frown is wrapped in the chain and GILLETTE
JUMPS OVER THE TOP, BRINGING THE CHAIN RIGHT UP INTO FROWN'S CROTCH!!!  Frown turns
around as Gillette jumps off the top..SPRINGBOARD ELBOWMSMASH and Frown falls like
a shot.  And we've got a cover..

ONE


TWO


Frown barely getting up from that one, as Gillette is sensing the kill here.  He grabs
Frown by the head, sticks his head under Gillette's legs, and piledrives him to the
mat.  And now Gillette is heading for the top. 

<Byron>
Oh no..

<Cross>
Gillette could be hitting the coup de grace here..he's howling for the headbutt..NO!!!
FROWN YANKED THE CHAIN, and GILLETTE CRASHED HEADFIRST TO THE MAT!!!!!!

<Byron>
And Frown is over there, he's rolling him up..

<Cross>
HE'S GOT THE TIGHTS *AND* HIS FEET ARE ON THE ROPES


ONE


TWO


DAMN HIM, THREE!!!!!

*DING DING DING*

<Byron>
And the Endurance King of the SWA keeps his undefeated streak intact! YEAH BABY!!!!

<Cross>
Frown pulled every dirty pin in the book, but yes, he is still the Cut 'n Shoot Heritage
champion.  And Frown just spits on the fallen Jay Gillette before yanking off the collar
and heading for the back, there's garbage flying towards the champion, and though I don't 
condone that, I can see why the fans would do it.

<Byron>
Well, the fans better "get used to disappointment", cause that man is going to toss
that belt into the garbage as soon as he gets his next title..he is undefeated
and he deserves a shot at bigger and better things.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
[Camera fades to a somewhat busy drugstore somewhere in Tallahassee.  A
quick camera pan shows that it's a CVS Pharmacy.  The camera comes up on
Bill Curtis, who is in street clothes and is carrying a plastic shopping
basket]

[Curtis]
(to himself)...ok, lessee, got some St. Johns Wort, Sportscreme....Tylenol, 
oh yeah, *definitely* Tylenol....(looks up at the camera) Oh, hey.  The brass 
said I should probably cut a promo, but my time is limited, so I had them come here.  
It's been awhile since I've done a location shoot... tight budgets and that....

[They round a corner to a display where they have plush stuffed animals
based on the old Rudolph and Frosty cartoons, with Christmas ornaments also based on
the show next to it.]

[Curtis]
Well...will you look at that?  I never thought I'd see the day where I
would see a stuffed Yukon Cornelius...in a CVS, no less....wait, they gotta have 
one....*starts tossing dolls left and right* no, don't want a Santa....don't want that 
little girl......don't want Snively Whiplash from the Frosty cartoon......

[A flying Rudolph doll plops right onto the head of a slightly geeky
storeclerk behind the counter]

[Clerk]
HEY!!!!

[Curtis]
(looking up) Sorry about that buddy....oh come on , it's FAKE STUFFING,
it couldn't hurt that much.....AHA!!!

[Triumphantly, Curtis pulls up a stuffed likeness of Herbie, the elf
that wanted to be a dentist]

[Curtis]
I *knew* if I dug long enough and hard enough, I'd find ol' Herbie
Monroe down there. Now I can do a promo.  Herbie, we've been through two wars.  
I've put you through fire. You've put me through a cage.  Now we've got one more 
dance in which what we do to each other is at the whim and call of chance and the 
sick minds of the wrestlers of the EWC.  It could be a chain match...

[Curtis reaches nearby, grabs a dog leash, and smashes the chain into
the face of the doll]

[Curtis]
Mmmmmmaybe it could be barbed wire.....

[Curtis pulls some barbed wire out...a closer look shows it's his
keychain loop..and wraps it around the throat of the doll, tearing a hole in the neck]

[Clerk] (moving from behind the counter)
HEY!!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

[Curtis]
Or maybe we can play with fire again....

[Curtis pulls out a lighter, and flicks it before the clerk comes over
and grabs the doll out of his hand]

[Clerk]
You...can't.....do.....this.

[Curtis just stares at the clerk blankly]

[Clerk]
....you haven't paid for it yet.

[Curtis breaks open a smile of recognition, then smiles and pulls out
his Visa card...stopping for a moment to smile for the camera, holding the card 
up...then hands it to the clerk.  The clerk gives him the doll back]

[Curtis]
I'll be back in for the rest of it, I gotta finish this up...

[Curtis then walks outside with the doll, pulls out the lighter, and
sets it on fire, letting the flames fall to the ground]

[Curtis]
Anyways, Herbie, whatever we do to each other, it's the last time, cause
otherwise Riker knows we'd be doing chair shots on each other with our
wheelchairs.  Now, I know how insane you are....and I think you and your
stitches know how crazy I am...but knowing that this is my last chance
to make you cry like a teething one year old,  I have a feeling we're
both getting carried out of there tonight.  Too bad for you that my
stretcher's gonna be ten pounds heavier.

[Curtis stomps out the flames, then heads back into the store, turning
around briefly..]

[Curtis]
Last dance, Herbie....make it count.

(fadeout)