You know Greg, you seem to be right. Taking this little one day getaway was a fantastic idea, the food alone is worth the price of admission...speaking of which, how did you get the money to pay for this stuff?
Oh yes, this food is just heaven, have you tried the crab cakes? Grade A cuisine all the way, yes sir.
Greg...how did you pay for this?
I uh...sort of took it out of your bank account...
Greg...I told you that was for emergencies only, luxury cruises are NOT emergencies.
I beg to differ my friend, in this instance it might very well be an emergency, we're goin to see how your confidence is, your "game" so to speak when it comes to all these attractive ladies we have on board. Go ahead, give it a try. See that woman right over there eating the ceaser salad? She looks like a good prospect, go for it man.
*Dusty looks over at the woman, she has brown hair and stunning blue eyes and is wearing something that her father would never let her leave the house in if she were back in high school. Dusty turns back to look at Greg and nods, then gets up and approaches the woman. She looks up from her food when she see's Dusty and the two strangers shake hands.*
Hi, i'm Dusty. I was wondering if maybe you would like to take a stroll around this lovely boat with me.
*The woman looks at Dusty like he just grew two heads. She is obviously not very interested.*
I'm sorry...Dusty was it? But I really don't think i'm your type.
Oh...okay...well...sorry to bother you...
*With a dejected expression across his face, Dusty returns over to his table where Greg is stuffing his face with cheesecake. He looks up at his friend and can tell that he just rejected, Greg should know, it happens each and every day of his life.*
She said that I "Wasn't her type."
Yeah...sorry about that man, don't sweat her, besides, I don't think it's you that was the problem.
What do you mean?
*Greg wipes the cheesecake off his mouth and then points at a sign on the wall "Welcome to the one day gay cruise." Dusty's jaw hits the floor.*
A gay cruise? GREG YOU BOOKED US ON A GAY CRUISE? What the hell is the matter with you don't you ever read the brochure before you just go out and book this stuff!?
Well I don't know...I wasn't paying attention. Sorry man, if I had known it was a gay cruise I never would have booked it obviously, despite what Raine Dawson thinks.
What do you mean "despite what Raine Dawson thinks?"
Well apparently she has suspicions that we swing from the other side of the plate, if you know what I mean.
Well that's not even true, if it was, i'd be in heaven right now!
You still can be, i'm in heaven and i'm not gay, just look at all these sugar filled goodies! They're all free!
*Just as Greg Dixson begins eating more and more, Dusty nibbles at his food, wondering how on earth Greg Dixson could have missed that this was a gay cruise. Two men begin walking over to Dusty's table, Dusty spots them and fears the worst. How do you explain being onboard a gay cruise as a straight man? This was going to be interesting. The two reach Dusty and Greg's table and stand right by Dusty.*
You're Dusty J aren't you?
Oh...yeah, yes I am.
Well i'm Russ and this is my friend Brettzky.
Nice to meet you both.
So you're totally not gay, why are you here Dusty?
Well duh Russ, he's here to show that he supports homosexuality and that no matter what, we're all people no matter what gender we're attracted to, right?
Ummm YES! That's exactly what i'm here for, i'm proving a point to all the narrow minded people out there that homosexuality is not wrong, it is completely fine and anyone who thinks otherwise is a moron!
*The entire room hears Dusty say such and begins to stand up and applaud. The two passengers Russ and Brettzky shove Dusty on the center stage with a microphone to make a speech. Dusty looks at all the passengers and then at Greg, who's mouthing "Just say something" from across the room. Dusty clears his throat and decides that he better make some kind of speech or the vegetables will go flying at his head.*
Let me tell you all something else too, you're not wrong for what you believe, you should feel empowered for being the way you are, because you are just fine the way you are and don't let any pigheaded fool tell you differently! I am glad to be here with all of you nice people and let's have a helluva cruise okay?
*Everyone in the dining area applauds. Greg gives a thumbs up. Russ shouts out.*
How about your upcoming matches Dusty? At Aggravated Assault? We'll all be watching and cheering for you!
Thank you Russ, and on the subject of Aggravated Assault, I can not wait for these two big matches. Before I was nervous, jittery, and maybe even frightened out of my boots because of the magnitude of these encounters, but i've come to realize, and with the assistance of western medicine i've come to realize that it's not something to fear, it's a challenge to grab by the horns and stay on for those eight seconds and beyond, to go beyond the call of a Television Title defense and to go out and win the big one, win one for the people, grab the brass ring, slip it on my finger, and raise it high in the sky.
I have some tough competition guys and girls, i'm not going to lie to you, but I can't wait. I've made a career out of battling big, strong people like Reginald L. Johnson and I cannot wait to be in the ring with someone of his calibur on the biggest stage there is, pay-per-view wrestling. It just doesn't get any better than that, we are going to tear the house down no doubt about it.
Austin Briggs is the ICWA World Champion, and until somebody beats him he will be the ICWA World Champion. He's the man I have to look out for the most in my four way match because of that reason alone. He wears the belt that Reginald, myself, and Raine Dawson all want. He is the man to be gunning for and the man to beat, he also has the most to lose and the least to gain. I now have the least to lose and nothing to gain. Austin Briggs is a fantastic competitor, but i'm hoping to make the champ no more out of him when we meet.
Raine Dawson, what can I say about Raine Dawson? She sure is a vocal one isn't she? Very eloquent on her words and really says what she feels. I can't fault anyone for doing that because until now I couldn't do it all that well. Raine Dawson wants to prove a point, the point that no matter what the gender of a person that they can accomplish great things, it's kind of like everyone here. You guys can do anything you want, don't let people tell you differently, and you will succeed at all you do. Raine is like that, but there's only one thing she won't succeed at, and that's winning the ICWA World Heavyweight Championship at Aggravated Assault, because that's reserved for me, D-U-S-T, whY? Spells out Dusty, in case you didn't know, i'm going to headline the big show. The guy who will wine and dine with any kind, get in the ring and shine, if I don't win it's a crime, because the people all stand in line, to get one look, at Number One.
Violent Bryan as you all know I am facing for my World Television Title and I couldn't be more pumped, I get to wrestle in two matches. I get to tangle with the multi talented Violent Bryan and then with the three aforementioned competitors and that is going to be fun. Win or lose to Violent Bryan it doesn't matter, because it's an honor just to step into the ring with him, and all the others, but no doubt about it, when it's all said and done Bryan, i'll still be the one getting the free digital cable.
Thank you all for listening, and have a great cruise why don't ya?
*Dusty leaves the stage to some applause and slaps some hands in the sea of people. After signing some autographs he goes and sits back down by Greg Dixson, who pats his friend on the back.*
Great speech there you gay rights activist you.
Very funny Greg. But I was happy that I could brighten their day up, even if they're already on a great cruise.
*Just then somebody hands a sheet of paper to Greg Dixson. Greg looks at Dusty who returns the confused glance and then opens the paper to read it.*
Hey Dust...looks like Austin Briggs thinks you're a lunatic.
Say what?
*Dusty snatches the paper away from Greg Dixson and gives it a once over.*
Well I guess you're right man, he thinks i'm a rapping lunatic, which is odd because I don't recall ever busting and raps. Maybe Austin Briggs should learn how to scout better like you do huh? A rookie...I remember that, what a great year. He won the World Title in his first match, I wonder if he really can grasp what he did? I can also wonder if he had anything to do with me not getting to the arena on time to compete in that Gauntlet for the Gold. It still eats at me that I couldn't be there Greg.
We're going to find out who did it one of these days man, don't sweat it too much, come on, let's go and have some fun, I think there's a basketball game going on!
*In case you're wondering, Greg and Dusty thoroughly enjoyed their hoops game. Dusty scored 17 points to lead the way for his team, along with 8 assists. Greg Dixson for a big guy didn't do so badly either, collecting 7 points and 4 rebounds in a bench role. The good news is their team won. Dusty and Greg loved spending time with everyone on the cruise and promised to come back for next month's. It was time well spent to relax, and social time for Dusty to release his anxieties. He was even given lots of phone numbers...we'll just ignore the fact that they were from men. Catch Aggravated Assault, ICWA's first pay-per-view supercard on March 12, 2006.*