| Scene 2 |
| Scene 2 L - Lister B - Bloke <scene> Lister has joined the army lookin to use his TKD talent to his advantage. He also knows there will be lots of blokes here for him to feed his sexual impulses. <The shower rooms after a close combat session> L - Well that was great didn't you think??? B - ...erm...I guess? What was all that shit you tried to do? L - well first I was going to do a summersault into a 360 degree spinning back heel kick to the "patella" round into a reverse roundhouse to the "solar plexus" and.... B- And you ended up on your arse. L - well ...i..i..erm....that's what it's supposed to do. B - I see, so when the other guy stood there waited for you to fall to the ground like a brick and proceeded to break your arm and nose that was supposed to happen. L - Well he cheated, he was supposed to let me get back up... B - WHAT???? L - That's what they do in TKD.... B - You twat. L - <peering at "blokes" groinal area> you wannna have me up the arse?? B - What the fuck are you on ya lanky streak of piss? Are you some kinda motherfunckin loser or what? L - No, I tried to fuck my dad once though..... B - You sick twat. L - <gets into stance> you wanna say that again big boy? B - <shudders> your gonna regret that, IM STRAIGHT! L - So? I'm homophobic but I aint complainin. B - That's it.... <they get into a fight and in an attempt to look cool lister lands on his arse again, "bloke" beats the shit outta him> B - Where the hell is your penis man? L - Oh its great isn't it? It's at least 20 inches!!!!I've taken sheep with that before and I could have ne woman I want! Everyone loves me and I bet you wannit too... I know u want me. B - You lying sick fuck.... *SMASH* <everything goes black for lister, he don't wake up for several days> |