05/08/2000 Infirmary, White Tower, Tar Valon Square in shape, this room is most often abuzz with activity. It contains the normal implements of a teaching infirmary, in fact, it is extremely well stocked with all manner of things: cots, jars, bottles, syringes, bandages, cloths, cabinets, shelves, books and tables along with plenty of hot water. The air has that sterile smell associated with the constant use of redwort, tinged with the unpleasant prickle of witchhazel. While most of the Healing is done via the One Power at the Tower, there are many minor medical situations that are dealt with the old fashioned way. There are several areas curtained off, for patients' privacy as well as for instructional usages. This is a teaching infirmary for the Yellow Ajah, after all. Beds in cheerful colors are lined up in neat rows, providing a comfortable place to sleep after a Healer's tender ministrations. Windows are kept wide open to all for light and fresh air. Denn'ryiel enters the infirmary carrying another covered basket, probably filled with harvested herbs that the Infirmary uses. On his bed near the entrance, Neelkan is actually laying back and sleeping, something he rarely does actually unless he's so tired he's about to pass out. And he doesn't seem to be sleeping very well. He's sweating, and jerking around every so often... But then anyone who's been in here when he slept would probably have seen something similar at least once. Denn'ryiel sets the basket aside in it's designated spot, then glances over at the patients, to see if any of them need to be attended to. Spotting Neelkan, her smile disappears when she notices him sweating. She finds a cloth towel and walks over towards his bed. Folding it up carefully, she sets it on his forehead. At the touch on his forehead, Neelkan suddenly jerks awake, sitting up quickly. Thanks for waking him up, even if that probably wasn't the intention. He sits up quickly, the towel dropping from his forehead and he starts to take a few deep breaths. He doesn't notice there's someone nearby quite yet. He may be awake physically, but his mind isn't quite there yet. Denn'ryiel steps back, not expecting such a knee-jerk reaction. "Oops, sorry about that," she says, with a small smile. "I didn't mean to wake you. You looked like you were feverish." Eh? Neelkan glances over quickly at the voice and... are those tears in his eyes? Hrm. He quickly looks away and mutters a soft response, "I'm fine... don't worry 'bout m'." He reaches up his hands to scrub at his face for a few moments. His hair is a little damp thanks to the sweat. Denn'ryiel smiles back to Neelkan and nods. "I'll have to take your word on that, since I haven't Delved you. I'm sorry I woke you though. I'll leave so you can get some sleep again..." she says, obviously trying not to be too much of a burden. "No!" Neelkan yells quickly, grabbing for her arm. "I'm not tired! I..." He almost sounds a little desperate for her not to leave. "Are ya busy right now...?" He asks softly. He just doesn't want to go back to sleep, but he doesn't want to get into that subject... Denn'ryiel blinks, and turns around in her tracks. "Um, no, not really. This is my free period... Are you certain you're not tired though?" she asks curiously, since he definately looks that way. She looks around for a chair nearby, and takes a seat. Neelkan takes a deep breath and rubs at his face furiously again, then runs his fingers through his hair to unflatten it and spike it up again, "I'm not tired... 'n I... I mean I just... I'm not tired. Really!" And he'll try to make that convincing, but a yawn a few seconds later kind of ruins it. He tries to cover it though. Denn'ryiel chuckles and nods. "Well, if you're not tired I suppose I can stick around for a little while. By the way, I'm sorry I had to leave you with Kirra Sedai. If I could have stayed I would have." "Don't worry 'bout it." Neelkan shakes his head. "She didn't treat m' too bad! Not as bad as the red haired Eharon noble woman who was in 'ere a few days ago." Meaning Dalloria. Pause... "Well, maybe she was, but not the other day. This mornin' she was a lil' mean though..." Denn'ryiel nods, moving a little closer with her chair. "I haven't interacted with Kirra Sedai much, before. What incident happened this morning?" she asks, sounding a little worried? Waving a hand absently, Neelkan tries to brush it off like it was nothing important, though he likely wouldn't have mentioned it if it wasn't... "She just somethin' 'at was sorta mean, but she's a woman, 'n not a nice one, like ya, so it's only expected!" He shouldn't have brought up the subject, but he's tired, and doesn't want to go back to sleep... so his brain isn't exactly functioning perfectly. (But then, is it ever?) Denn'ryiel nods once, though she looks a little confused since he didn't elaborate much. She shrugs, and says, "Well, I can't promise to protect you, since she's higher on the ladder here than I am. But I'll keep a lookout." She pauses, before asking, "Did Kirra Sedai make good on her statement, and find your earrings?" Neelkan shakes his head in response, his hair ruffling slightly as he does, "No, she didn't. Startin' t' think I'm never gettin' 'em back." He gives a small sigh at that, then shrugs, "Or 'ey prolly just lost 'em 'r something." He's sitting on his usual bed, a little damp from sweat on his forehead and scalp, and look tired, but also looking like he's trying to hide it. Denn'ryiel nods once, looking a bit reassured. "Oh, well then I guess you've got an excuse to stay a little longer." She is sitting on a chair next to Neelkan's bed. "I'll look for them though... I don't see why they'd hold them any longer either." "Me niether..." Neelkan mutters softly. "Well, unless 'ey know..." he pauses. Maybe he shouldn't bring that one up. She might not like him anymore if he does. "'ey could be old 'r somethin'. 'ey were given t' m' by a friend, but I don't know how old 'ey are 'r nothin'." Yeah, maybe they're just artifacts or something... Neelkan sighs as Denn is suddenly pulled away by some Aes Sedai and lays back down to stare at the ceiling. There is no way he's going to close his eyes. He won't go back to sleep. No matter how tired he is. So maybe laying down is a bad thing...? He slowly jerks to sit upright and twists to dangle his feet off the bed. Redd turns to glance at Neelkan, "Hi." "Hey..." Neelkan mutters at first, quite absently like he didn't actually hear who said hi to him, then he glances up quickly and smirks tiredly, "Oh! Hey, Redd!" Pause... "Uh..." He doesn't know what to say to his friend after the information told the other day still... Redd frowns. He hoped he wouldn't remember that, but oh well. "How are you, Neel?" "I... I had a weird dream, but a'right..." Neelkan says with a small shrug. It's no big deal! Just a dream! Redd blinks a little. "Bad dream?" He remembered his bad dream... he had it /again/ last night... "Ye'h... I'm used t' it though! Get 'em all the time..." Neelkan shrugs, "M'ma used t' say I had a vivid imagination, 'r somethin' like 'at." Nope. Nothing else. Just dreams. Really. Redd shakes his head. "Tell me, please?" "Tell you what...?" Neelkan asks, shifting around self consiously on the edge of his bed... He glances around, as if making sure none of the evil women in the room are ease dropping. Redd frowns. He doesn't want to do this, but he trusts Neelkan. "Tell me your nightmare, I will tell you mine..." "I... I..." Neelkan suddenly ducks his head down. "I don't want t' talk 'bout it... I'm sorry, Redd... I just can't... I just..." His shoulders shake for a brief moment then he takes a deep breath. "Maybe later I can... but not right now..." It's still too strong in his memory and he doesn't want to break down. Not with all these woman around to see him! Redd frowns. He walks to Neelkan's bed and jumps up next to him. Casually. "I don't care if you tell me." He shakes his head. "I want to tell you my flamin' dream." That word came out of nowhere, and he doesn't even notice he said it. He is uspet, otherwise he would have noticed. He /never/ speaks like that. "Oh." Neelkan looks up again, taking in a deep breath. "A'right. Ya can tell m'." He awkwardly reaches over and pats the young kid on the shoulder. He's not exactly the best at this comforting upset kids thing. If he had had younger siblings it might be a different story! Redd doesn't have to try and remember the dream, it happened this morning, but he can remember as if it happened five minutes ago. "I was on a horse, with people. I think I knew the people... they were talking, but not to me. Then we were attacked... by big things... but I ran..." He starts shaking violently, starting to cry. Eh... Neelkan looks so confused! "'ey... it's... 'kay... really..." Finally he reaches over and pulls an arm around the boy. "Really! It's 'kay... Don't cry. It's just a dream..." Redd glances up at Neelkan, tears running down his cheeks. He throws his arms around Neeklan and continues to cry. "I think they died..." Aw man... Neelkan just tries to hug the kid a little, "It's a'right..." He bites on his lower lip softly. He has no idea what to do in this situation, so he's just going to say the same thing over and over, "It's a'right.. really.. Please stop cryin'..." He glances around. Help! Redd rests his head on Neel's side, crying. "They died..." is all he says, repeating it a few times. "I could've helped..." "It was just a dream, Redd..." Neelkan repeats again. Blood and ashes. All this talk of dreams and death in dreams make this whole subject almost too personal with him. He's trying to keep himself composed though. Hard with a kid clinging to him crying... Arg. Ever so slowly Aliana makes her way to Neelkan and Redd,"Are you two ok?" Her voice is soft and gentle despite the fact that he clothes still look like she'll be going into battle at any moment. Redd glances up at Aliana quietly. At least he is silent now, though he still is crying. Neelkan's comfort is helping him. Sigh. Neelkan continues to hug the boy, rubbing his back slightly, and looking completely awkward doing it. Like he's never hugged someone before or something... He looks up at the voice of the Aes Sedai and says in response, "He's just... upset... Aes Sedai." What was that!? Respect!? Shock!! The same Aes Sedai from the other day all dressed up in men's clothes. Aliana smiles gently at the two,"I am Aliana Sedai. " Turning to Redd for a second,"Another Dream?" Redd shakes his head. "S-s-s-same o-o-one... A-a-aes S-s-sedai..." He continues to cry silently. Sometimes Neelkan wishes someone would have hugged him when he used to cry over his dreams instead of make fun of him like his sisters always did... this is one of them! But he doesn't say anything and just continues to hold the boy. Without even thinking a hand gently touches Redd's head,"Please don't cry young one. What is it?" Aliana, being gentle. What in the world. Redd sniffs quickly and looks at Aliana again. "I t-t-t-think I knew the p-p-people.... they died..." Aliana hmmmms slightly,"What is your name?" A small bit of cloth is handed to the boy,"Blow your nose. Don't sniff it back in." "Just don't go blowin' any of it on me..." Neelkan grumbles softly. Sorry, he's trying here, but he's not too good at these things. Redd looks away from the two as he blows his nose. Polite even when crying. "I d-d-d-don't remember my n-n-name... every c-c-calls me R-r-redd." A laugh escapes Aliana in spite of herself,"Oh Neelkan, you know as well as I do you are concerned and want to comfort the lad. Enough of being gruff." SHe finds this boy rather amusing. She sobers quickly at what Redd says,"Perhaps the key to your past lies in who the people in your dreams are. Mayhap they are more than simply dreams but clues. However, if you wish I could shield your dreams." Grump! Am not! But Neelkan doesn't say that outloud, instead he just sits there awkwardly and shrugs, then starts up at the moment she starts going into shielding dreams. They can do that? His blue-green eyes widen a little. Redd frowns a little, shaking his head. "I-i-if my dreams are w-w-will help me r-r-remember who I am... I w-w-want to have t-t-them..." Aliana hmmms slightly,"If they are clues you'll need to think about them even after they are done...Do you really want to remember? Perhaps there is a reason they remain locked..." "How would... 'shieldin'' his dreams help anythin'...?" Neelkan asks curiously, but trying not to sound too curious! Really! He just is wondering because it was mentioned... That's it! Redd listens quietly. The conversation has changed directions and doesn't involve him now. He just cries quietly. Emerald eyes flicker to Neelkan,"Shielding someone's dreams protects them from Dreaming. WHat exactly Dreaming is I don't know but it does stop certain types of dreams. " "Protects them... from dreamin'...?" Neelkan frowns for a long moment, then goes back to hugging the kid. "Listen, e'en if ya knew the people, 'ere was nothin' ya could've done, kay? Ya prolly just would've gotten killed yerself, 'n 'en I wouldn't have any guy friends in 'is place, 'n we can't have 'at, can we?" This is his attempt to get the kid to stop crying. Ironically, it works. The kid laughs at his comment, looking up at him, wiping away the last few tears. "No... we can't..." He is still crying a little, but it is only the last few tears before he completely stops. Aliana rolls her eyes,"You are being a rather bad influence on him Neelkan. We're not as bad as that!" Neelkan continues to hug the kid and glares slightly at Aliana, "I wasn't sayin' ya were, just a guy needs a guy friend, ya know?" Grump. He's actually been trying to be nice here! Aliana looks at Neelkan,"For once you weren't commenting on how horribly we treat you? How much we bully you around? Will wonders never cease?!" Her voice despite the words are more in jest than serious. Redd glances to Aliana, quietly. "I only have Kennyth... but Kennyth doesn't talk, Aes Sedai. And he's always busy being in the army..." Neel must be a bad influence if he is jumping in without being talked to first. "You also need friends around your own age Redd." Aliana's voice is gentle as she speaks,"Having friends who are much older is problematic." Neelkan is a baaaaad influence. He's never had to be a good influence before cause he only had sisters and a bunch of bandit buddies to hang around with. They were a bad influence on him. "'ere's nothin' wrong with havin' older friends. Most m' friends were older!" He -was- the youngest amoung his group of bandits, after all. Emerald eyes lock into Neelkan," It is better for a child to have friends their own age. One of the Yellows documented this." Aliana's voice is smooth but not quite condescending,"Although honestly, Yellow reports make little sense to me. Give me a strategy map and I'll understand but those reports drive me nuts." Redd says bluntly, "Who is my age?" Neelkan is a /very/ bad influence. "'ere was a kid 'round 'ere earlier, but I think he's younger 'en ya." Neelkan (the bad influence boy) mentions softly. "Another boy? Well there might be some amongst the refugees...." Aliana's rather unsure,"I don't know...I'm not very good with children...I've never really been the motherly type...Not until Eharon did I ever even allow what happened on the battle field affect me. Maybe I am getting soft the more Mother has me Tower based." "Eharon...?" Neelkan asks softly before shuddering. He doesn't like the mention of his homeland at all. Evil women from there! Redd just listens. He has no idea what is going on now... "Either way, Redd, I'm yer friend, so don't worry 'bout nothin'." Neelkan says with a small smirk. "But if ya happen t' find a friend closer t' yer age, 'en I'll still be yer friend!" No matter how bad an influence he is. "No one said you shouldn't. Although you can be a better influience by talking properly and using the manners that you should have. " Aliana says, gently scolding Neelkan although not as bad as some might considering his behaviour,. Redd smiles a little, like he has something to say that might not be liked, but he remains silent. At least Neelkan hasn't had his full affect on the lad yet. Neelkan had manners. A long, long time ago (all of two years). Then he ran away and joined up with a bunch of bandits and those manners got thrown out the window. He's trying though! He only curses every so often now.. "I talk properly..." he grumbles under his breath. Aliana hmms slightly,"Grumbling isn't polite. Although it is quite common among the Gaidin. I even have to deal with Savren doing it on me." Redd looks between Neelkan and Aliana... "Grumbling isn't polite!" Almost as if it were the greatest thing he had heard... loud enough to wake sleeping patients in the room. Emerald eyes look at Redd and suddenly Aliana bursts into laughter,"OH dear! I'm starting to sound like some of the old croanies around this place! Just don't be rude to people. Grumbling is irritating cause I can't always catch /exactly/ what was said..." Huh? Neelkan glances at his friend, "Yer supposed t' defend m' 'ere, kid." Sigh. Oh well! At least he didn't grumble as he said that. He kind of mulled though. Then he looks at Aliana, "I haven't seen any old croanies 'round 'ere." The Aes Sedai all look actually young-ish! Redd jumps off the bed and grabs Aliana's arms, "No! THE man told me that in my dream!" Aliana blinks slightly at the boy holding her arms and asks calmly,"What man?" Neelkan blinks slightly. Huh? "One of the people on the horse with ya..?" Redd spins and repeats his last action, this time with Neelkan's arms. "Yes! The big, old man did!" Daaaaaa! Neelkan tries not to grumble as he's grabbed, and grabs back lightly, "Well, 'at's... great!" Then he adds softly, "I think..." Sorry. Neel isn't the brightest star in the sky. Aliana blinks,"Do you remember what was happening when you were on horseback?" Redd frowns slightly. "The big old man told the young girl 'They will tell you when you get there...' then the younger man said, 'Then you can start throwing Short One around.' I don't know why, but I said, 'Try it...' then the older man said, 'Grumbling isn't polite...' Aliana blinks slightly,"Were they your family perhaps? The Short One being you?" "Eh..." Neelkan says thoughtfully, then nods, "Sounds... interestin'..." But very, very confusing. So he's just going to nod here! Redd frowns a little... "My... da...?" Aliana hmms slightly,"Your da, brother and sister perhaps?" "Lucky. I didn't even have any brothers!" Neelkan comments softly. Redd looks up at Aliana now. "There was an older woman too... my... ma?" Neel's words are missed by Redd. Aliana nods slightly to Redd,"Possibly. More than likely." Turning to Neelkan,"Most of my siblings were boys." Perhaps that's why she dresses like she does. Course she /is/ Manetheran... "All -five- of mine 'r girls..." Neelkan grumbles softly. "All older too!" Sorry, he had to grumble that one. Redd frowns slowly, oh so slowly. The frown can't be anything good. "NO! IT CAN'T BE!" He then throws himself onto the bed behind Neelkan and starts crying all over again. Aliana walks to the bed and sits down by the boy,"What's wrong?" She gently rubs his back almost instictively. Perhaps she does have motherly instincts. Huh!?!? Neelkan instantly turns around, his sisters forgotten and puts a hand on the boy's back, "Look.. I... blood and ashes! Arg." This is so confusing! "I ... I'm sorry! Please don't cry..." And oddly, he knows what's wrong! "'ey were yer family, 'n now ya think 'ey're prolly dead..." Oh man... Neel HATES his family, but he wouldn't be able to handle it if they died... Sigh. He ignores the Aes Sedai and just hugs the kid now, closing his eyes. Redd only thinks about how that can't be his family... his family has to be alive... but the two people trying to comfort him seems to calm him a little. "They can't be... no... please..." "Death comes to us all. It changes us. I know. I've gone through it." Aliana's voice is gentle and yet full of sorrow. GAME: Shayol Ghul burps real loud. Saving... Neelkan doesn't look up, he just holds onto Redd, pressing his face into the boy's shoulder. Um... is he shaking a little bit? No. That must be just the boy! Really... Redd speaks now without thinking. Memories surfacing that he didn't know was there... "I rode as fast as I could... I couldn't save them! It's my fault!" Aliana touches Redd's shoulder,"Hush. Sometimes there is nothing we can do. My brother was killed while I was Accepted. He was my bestfriend and confidant from the time I was little until the time he died. Even more so than he was for his Ward. My Sister that bonded him was devastated by his death as well for she loved him. We all lost a great part of our selves." Neelkan just continues to cling tightly for a few more moments, then retrieves his face from the kid's shoulder and reaches up to wipe at his own eyes. No tears! Really. Grrr. "'ere was nothin' ya could've done... remember? Yer family would've wanted ya t' get away..." "Exactly. To blame yourself for living is pointless. You can do more for their memory alive than you could dead." Aliana's voice is gentle,"Self-recerimination is pointless. I've been there and done it I know." Tears have even begun to fall from Aliana's eyes. Redd slides back close to the edge of the bed. "Why did they have to die?" He edges back a little farther, and misjudges the edge, going over. He cracks his head hard on a nearby table on his fall down, and is unconcious when he hits the floor. That one will hurt when he wakes up. Emerald eyes go wide and without thinking Aliana reaches down to pick the boy up. Neelkan instantly jumps up from the bed. "Redd!" Arg! Well, if he had to hurt himself badly it's a good thing he did it in the infirmary... Right!? Neelkan looks around worriedly, his eyes actually full with tears before he wipes them away again. Come on Yellows! Make yerself useful! With a hand on Redd's body Aliana's tears fall from her eyes and his body shudders as it goes under a healing. Um... Neelkan awkwardly loosens his sash a little and brings up the end to wipe the tears off the Aes Sedai's cheeks. What's this!? Concern for a woman!? Just don't go spreadin' it around. His reputation would be ruined. "Will he be 'kay?" Aliana nods slightly,"I'm good at Healing. Almost as good as a Yellow. I simply choose not to employ it as my career. I'm trained to fight and kill the enemy... under any cost." She says the last with a twinge of pain as if remembering something bad. Neelkan bites his lower lip. He's never killed anyone before, but he knows enough about fighting that he probably could if he wanted. "I... uh... thank ya. F'r helpin' 'im..." He secures the sash tightly now, and wipes at his own eyes again. Aliana shakes her head,"It won't make up for what I did but I also can not stand to see children in pain. I may not know how to deal with them but I can't stand to see them in pain." Neelkan frowns at the woman for a while now... "What? Did ya hurt a kid 'r somethin'?" He really needs to learn how to ask those kinds of questions delicately! Aliana sighs slightly,"I was fighting DreadLords in a combat situations and a boy who had begun channelings was grabbed just as my weave caught the first DreadLord boiling her and him alive." Oh. Well... Neelkan's just going to nod and sit back on his heels now. "I saw him. But if I'd faltered the other one could have broken loose and then I'd be dead. I remember his face when it hit him still...I had nightmares every evening for a month afterwards." ALiana's voice is etched in pain. "I know how nightmares are..." Neelkan says softly, looking around to see who all is here to see him, then he moves up and hugs the woman briefly. "'ere was prolly nothin' ya could've done differently, so... uh..." Whatever he was supposed to say there. He sucks at this! Aliana smiles gently at Neelkan,"Not all women are as bad as you think. Aes Sedai, are how we are because we feel that in order to serve we must move people. I am /horrible/ at manipulating people. What I tell you is the truth. I am dedicated to serving people. That is why I fight. Unlike some of my Sisters who fight to eliminate the Shadowspawn. I fight to protect those who can not protect themselves. I failed once but I don't intend to fail again if I have to bond ever man between here and Shayoul Gaul.(sp?)" "I know not all women 'r bad... but most are..." Neelkan says softly, shrugging a little as he pulls away from the woman. "'n I'm... uh..." he pauses and scratches at his hair. "Sorry, I was rude 'n stuff t' ya..." He looks away. Don't bug him about this or he'll never apologize again! Yup. He's a softy deep down. Aliana touches Neelkan's cheek gently,"It is ok. You're sort of like a little brother. And I am sorry for making you feel bad. You will fight one day more than likely. In some way we all fight. Why will you fight?" "I... I dunno. I'd protect people m'friends in a heartbeat though!" Neelkan says, sitting up slightly, and pulling away from her hand after a moment, "'n I got 'nough big sisters, 'anks. I can do without any more!" Aliana laughs slightly,"What about one that will be more of a friend than tell you what to do?" There's a pause, then Neelkan shrugs, "M'be..." Then he adds with a slight shake of his head, his white-streaked red hair flicking about, "'n m'be it's not such a bad idea t' stay 'ere f'r a while 'n start trainin' with the Warders..." Arg! Every day he stays here he comes up with a new reason not to leave. Go figure. Aliana nods slightly,"Perhaps that would do you some good. And you /should/ be old enough to make decisions for yourself. If you want I'll make Savren sponsor you. Now him I'll boss around. It is my job as his Ward." She says the last bit slyly as a joke. Neelkan chuckles softly, "Well, I don't think I'll get... uh... made a 'warder' 'en! Just wouldn't mind learnin' from 'em!" He stands up now and starts towards his bed, finally too tired to stay awake anymore, no matter how much he wishes he wouldn't have to sleep. "I'm gettin' real tired now, so m'be I'll see ya later... uh... Aliana..." Pause. Should he add Sedai to the end of that...? Well even if he should, he doesn't. Aliana nods slightly,"Go along now. I am going to check to make sure Redd is alright before I sleep myself." She doesn't say anything bout him leaving off the Sedai,. "A'right. 'n... 'anks 'gain f'r helpin' 'im." And for being nice, but Neelkan won't add that part, he just goes over to his bed and lays down and zonks out a few seconds later. So tiiiiiired. He just hopes the dreams don't come back... Aliana looks at Redd then Neelkan and smiles gently and turns and leaves.