| -Moree's Journal- It's not as if I'm being selfish. Not like I'm thinking only of myself. The only person I'm slighting at all is Hanoreel, and she's just jealous. I don't mean to sound immature when I say that; it's true. Hanoreel has kicked me out of "her" apartments, jealous of Sirien's desire for me, and not her, so now I'm sleeping in the kitchens on one of the drudges cots. It's really not so bad, better than some get. At least it's warm, and I have Lor. She wouldn't let any harm come to me while there's breath in her body. Sometimes I feel undeserving of that type of care from her. Who says I should have that sort of one path relationship? With anyone? I've got the feeling this Sirien-Father of mine will expect the same thing. He'll spoil me a little, and I'll dote on him forever. The promise of love is a great one, and one that few humans can turn away from And there is the voices. Come to us Moree? What could that be? I know it wasn't me, or my imagination. I felt as if it were from the outside going in, not from the inside going out. But how can I know? I'd ignore it completely, forget about it, except that every time I try I can almost hear them (the voices) again, and I can't forget. I dare not tell anyone of this either; not even write to Lanata (who knows who reads the letters?), for she'd probably grow uneasy. She is beautiful, and gifted, and the most sympathetic person I know, but I don't know if she'd understand anything of this "power" the voices mentioned. I only know I have no such "power". Although how I know what "power" is, I have no clue. No, stop thinking about that. This is your journal-write about your life, not your thoughts. Tell the journal what's going to happen to you Moree. Well, (I say), I'm going to Star Find afterall. I'll know Sirien's intentions once I meet him, and if they're less than honest, I won't let him use me. But I'm anxious for a family, although I don't know why. I don't seem to know a lot of things lately, and that frightens me more. But Perliah has traveled back to Star Find, to inform Sirien of my decision. Theoretically, once he gets there and arrangements are made, they'll contact the Weyr and have a dragon sent for me. A dragon! Can you believe that? (And I try to think happily now, instead of with that magical remorse that comes whenever I think of the winged creatures) Perliah said Sirien had enough influence to send a "proper" dragon, not just a green. Although I dare say Perliah and Sirien seemed prejudiced on the matter. What difference would it make? I'd give my arm just to touch a dragon egg, much less a green! Then there is Lor, and I fear she'll have to be sent seperately from me. She wouldn't understand riding a dragon, or going between. I don't want to hurt her, and she is too old for such stress. I should have sent her on with Perliah, except that I didn't know if everything would work out, and I didn't want to be seperated from her forever. Why people say a fire-lizard is the only true companion, I'll never know. And here comes the lad to turn out the glows down here, so I'll have to stop writing for now. I wish myself the best of luck at Star Find, and hope a new family awaits me there. Good night. Moree was sitting in the courtyard, on a cold stone bench, when she felt the first tingling sensation in her stomach. She knew that the dragon was near, and if the sky had been less foggy, she would have easily seen the large blue gliding easily downwards. This is it. Moree thought, mind turning rapidly. I get to touch the dragon today, I get to feel one beneath my hands and legs. Moree shivered, although not for the cold, and darted inside to collect her things before the dragon landed. She already had all her possessions (except for a couple pair of cloths) packed up tight in two sacks. It was easy enough for Moree to be in and out of kitchens before anyone else woke up. It was so early in the morning, not even the drudges were awake. But Moree had woken early, knowing that today a dragon would come for her. She didn't know how she knew, for Perliah had sent no word of it, but Moree sensed it nonetheless. So she sat in the courtyard, waiting for it to come, waiting more patiently than normal to head off to a new future. It was early enough that the dragon in the courtyard didn't draw any attention, and Moree had to force herself to breath as she re-entered the courtyard, and nearly stumbled over the dragons rider! "Erm, sorry." Moree mumbled, straightening herself and trying not to blush as she had fallen right into the rider's arms. The man grinned at her, brushing his shirt off and then reaching out to shake Moree's hand. "Moree I presume? Yes, you look rather like your father. Or, er.." The rider furrowed his brows, trying to think of the best way to approach this akward situation. Moree forced herself to take another breath, and concentrate on the rider and not the dragon laying just beyond him. "Yes sir." Moree said respectfully, dipping her head. "But do tell me," She said, raising herself, "do you know the Holder Sirien well? I know nothing about him...and now it seems I'm going to be his daughter." "Must be confusing for you." The rider said, flashing another smile her way, and then leading her towards the dragon. Moree watched as the blue swung his head towards them, and watched her with swirling eyes. Moree felt the dragon, felt him strongly. She tried to shake the feeling off, tried to ignore it. "Yes, well, it's either that or stay here. And I'd much rather go off to a strange place then be an apprentice tailor for another three turns. I'm not as good at sewing as all that." The rider continued to smile, and Moree thought he looked slightly moronic-but handsome nonetheless, so she smiled back. "Well, no, I don't know the Holder Sirien all too well. I've seen him at Gathers, but that's about it. I'm M'ranu, by the way." The rider said, and Moree nodded. "That's Nenverth." M'ranu said, coming up to the blue and resting his arms across the dragon's forearm. Moree stood back, tense and fearful. "I know." She whispered, more to herself than anything. M'ranu frowned at her. "What?" "Nothing." Moree shook her head and forced herself to go forward. "Nothing, I was just saying how lovely he was." That was a seething lie, Moree knew. She didn't consider the dragon beautiful, or "lovely", or anything like that. Most people who became Candidates saw only beauty in the dragons, and Moree didn't. She saw just another creature standing there. No, not a creature. Moree thought. Another person. I see another person standing there. And who remarks on how beautiful a certain man or woman is when they're standing right there? Nenverth started crooning then, and Moree jumped back in surprise. M'ranu laughed, flattered that the girl thought his dragon was lovely, and patted Nenverth affectionately. "Don't worry Lady; he's usually noisy in the mornings. Especially since we're on Search, he's more alert than usual." "You're on Search?" Moree balked at that idea. Hopefully this Search dragon didn't want anything from her, hopefully he'd leave her alone. She didn't want to refuse if she was Searched. But she didn't want to go to the Weyr. "Yes, well, not officially. Not until we've delivered you to this new Hold of yours." Moree smiled with relief. "It's not my Hold, I'm just going to live there." "Knowing Sirien, I'd say there's enough of a chance it could be your Hold." M''ranu winked at her, and then grabbing the straps around Nenverth's neck, he swung easily up. He lowered his hand to Moree once he was settled, and Moree lifted her skirts and grabbed it. A sudden forced knocked Moree back a few steps, and caused her to be pushed away from the dragon. Her mind screamed with agony at that, and Moree almost yelled with frustration. What was the matter with her? She forced her mind and heart to behave, and looked about to see what had pushed her. It was Lor. The white dog was snarling up at the dragon, about to take her mistress away. The canine had followed Moree out here, Moree having forgotten to close Lor up somewhere beforehand. Now it was too late; what would Lor do seeing Moree leave like that? Lor knew Moree shouldn't go anywhere without her. Moree looked up at M'ranu, confused, hoping her could see her dilemna. M'ranu waved his hand towards the dog and shrugged. "Yours I presume?" Lor was inching protectively closer to Moree, keeping her eye on the "dangerous" dragon always. "Yes." Moree said, kneeling to pet Lor. The dog calmed down, thwumping her tail to show her compliance with Moree's unspoken command. "Bring her." M'ranu said evenly, obviously not disturbed by the prospect of the dog riding his dragon. Moree stood up, and stared up at the man. "Bring her? How? I mean, won't it be hard with the dragon going between and all?" Moree shuddered, hoping between wasn't that bad, and forced her eyes to keep away from Nenverth at all times. She wouldn't think of this dragon, wouldn't acknowledge him as anything more than M'ranu's. "It shouldn't." M'ranu said, smiling. "Nenverth's conveyed enough canines anyway. You wouldn't believe how many of our Canididates have pets." M'ranu rolled his eyes, and then leaned down. "Pick her up, and hand her to me. She's not to heavy, is she?" Moree shook her head, and bent over again, struggling to lift the weighty dog. Lor tucked her tail and ears down with fright. Moree never picked her up. But Moree was mistress, and to be obeyed; so even as the unhappy Lor was passed up to M'ranu on top of a dragon, she didn't balk. And was soon calm as M'ranu helped Moree up, and was passed again to her mistress. Lor felt Moree scratching her head, and holding her tightly. "It'll be alright love. Don't worry, we'll be back on the ground soon." Although feeling Nenverth breathing beneath her, Moree wasn't so sure she wanted to be back on the ground. But again she forced all thoughts of dragon-love from her mind, and acted as though the blue meant nothing to her. But a few long moments passed, and still they just sat there. Lor was beginning to wiggle, and Moree ordered the canine to be still. What was taking so long? Then Moree realized M'ranu must be talking to Nen...his blue. That was confirmed a moment later when M'ranu turned around to grin at her sheepishly, and slapped Nen...his blue's neck. "Sorry 'bout that. Big wherry's so full of advice these days. Are you ready?" Moree gripped tighter to Lor, and nodded her head. Was she ready to meet her long lost family? Was she ready to possible become a Lady Holder? (for that's the impression she got from everyone that that's what Sirien had in mind for her), and was she ready to leave Hanoreel behind? The answer to all of them was no, but Moree said yes and allowed joy to rush through her unrestrained as the dragon lept into the sky and winked between. continue..... |