Chapter 12

 

“Are you sure you want this child, baby?” Chris asked suspiciously as he stopped the engine infront of my house.

 

“Positive.” I answered back.

 

“Look Skylar, I want you to think about it tonight again. I mean, it’s a hard work and means lots of responsibilities-“

 

“If you don’t want it, then you can go away from my life but i’m gonna raise this child and it could definite live without a father like i live without a mother.” I snapped.

 

“What the hell you are talking about?” he yelled at me. “There’s NO DAMN WAY i would let it grow up without a dad. Why i did ask that question was that if YOU could handle it, i want a child coz i love you. It’s our Sky, a thing we could really say that it belongs to us.”

 

I looked down. Why was I bitching him when he didn’t deserve? He was always there for me and i could still easily accuse him. The thought of him leaving me alone ran through my mind and i hugged him tightly. What one thing i like about our relationship was the times we could communicate without speaking.

 

“When are you gonna tell your dad?” he whispered.

 

“I have no idea...”

 

“You have to tell him soon before your navel will appear.” He suggested. “Will you want me to be with you when you tell it?”

 

“No, i have to deal with it by myself. Seeing you there only will make him more furious.”

 

“I love you.” He said as i got out of the car.

 

Vanessa was watching another soap opera on TV when i got inside. She greeted me without taking her eyes off of the TV. For the first time in my life, I thanked God for the major effect of soap operas on women. Last thing I wanted at that time was being questioned cos of my red and baggy eyes and the horrible look placed on my face for the last two hours. As I entered my room, I saw Tim playing with his Game boy, placed himself comfortably on my bed. He was too busy with his game boy that he didn’t even notice me. I shut the door behind me to get his attention.

 

“Hi Sky, I just wanted to spend sometime with ya and Uncle Nicky said it was allright for me to sleep over- Oh my good God, what happened Sky?” he had finally looked up from his game to notice the horrible look on my face.

 

I didn’t respond, tears welled up in my eyes. God, what had i gotten myself into?

 

He quickly got up and reached me, dragging me towards my bed to sit down.

 

“Tell me what happened Skylar. I can’t stand seeing you miserable. What’s the problem?”

 

“I can’t tell you...” I whispered.

 

“No you can. We’re best friends, I tell you everything, now tell me please...” he begged.

 

What was i supposed to do right now? He was my best friend and this situation was too heavy to handle by only myself. Chris was with me but who i need was someone other than the one sharing the same guilt. If it was a guilt at all. Swallowing my tears, i spoke softly.

 

“I’m pregnant.”

 

Tim’s face went dead white as his hand holding my shoulder dropped onto bed.

 

“What?!” he managed to say.

 

“Don’t tell me how that happened or anything. Me and Chris gonna raise it together.”

 

A few silent minutes passed till Tim comprehended the situation and spoke hesitantly.

 

“What about  your dad? His response won’t be good i suppose.”

 

“Why are you telling me something that I’m already aware of?” I yelled as i got up and wandered around my room.

 

“It’s alright Skylar, we could find a solve, don’t worry...” convinced tim who got up after me and tried to hug me.

 

“What I need is not A HUG right now Tim, I want certain things, certain convinces!” I yelled. “Could you realize that this baby will make a mess of my life? My life, Chris’ life, dad’s life. What will happen to my education? With this baby, I couldn’t be what i’ve always dreamt of, an engineer! Cuz it’ll take all my time and i’ll end up being just a housewife whose only mission would be doing chores, taking care of the baby and watch those stupid soap operas. I’d rather die than having a life like that!”

 

“Then why are you still wanting that child?” Tim asked acuusingly.

 

“Cos i can’t be a murderer. It’s a murder and we both know it very well. It’s my blood, my soul, a piece of my life!”

 

“You can’t think healthily Skylar. You can’t. Just try sleeping some and when you wake up we’ll talk things out and tell your dad...” he said relented.

 

“I can’t tell, I can’t tell him Tim...” i started crying.

 

“It’s okay, everything’s gonna be alright baby, just sleep...” he whispered hugging me.

 

“Tim don’t leave me alone, I’m afraid.” I sobbed as i slowly layed down on my bed and drifted into a restless sleep.