Prologue

 

A.J.’s POV

 

I remember it all to well. It’s still all too vivid. That night was a living nightmare. To this very day my mind plays that terrible phone call over and over, in my nightmares. I wake up sweating and sobbing. Calling out desperately for my beloved Taylor. I will never forget that beautiful woman. I won’t forget her gorgeous long red hair that shined in the sun. I will never forget her big green eyes. The eyes that I had always sworn I could get lost in. They said so much about her. I will never forget the few freckles that were scattered on her face that I always teased her about. The way that she smiled and laughed. I will never forget our days at the beach, watching the sun go down, or the times we shared just sitting inside our home, watching a movie. Those memories, at the time were taken completely for granted. I know better now.

 

The cell phone rang over and over. Glancing over to his digital clock, he saw that it was nearing 3:30 in the morning.  A.J. mumbled several incoherent replies before answering the call that woke him. Clearing his throat he picked up the phone. “Hello.”

 

“Is this an A.J. Mclean?”

 

Panic took over him as he realized something had happened, not recognizing the voice. And of course who would call his cell phone unless something had happened.

 

“Uh…yeah, yes this is him…what’s going on who is this?”

 

“Sir I have called to inform you that a Taylor Michaels has been in an accident.”

 

“Accident, Oh my God, what kind of accident, is she okay?”

 

“Sir, all I can say is that it was an automobile accident. I am really terribly sorry, but we can’t give out any more information out over the phone.”

 

“Okay, okay what hospital is she at,” A.J. replied urgently, beginning to panic.

 

 Once given the information he was on a flight to Florida. The whole time on his cell trying to get a hold of any of Taylor’s family. He tried for an hour before giving up. Finally the plane landed and he went in search of the hospital. A.J. ran in requesting the room number to his girlfriend’s room. Once he reached her, his Taylor had already fell into a coma. He sat for hours holding her hands. Praying for a miracle. Taylor died the next morning of heart failure. All of their plans they had for their future had been shattered into a million pieces. He refused to accept it. Living his life in denial…

 

 

Brian’s POV

 

It all started month’s ago. It began when I would wake up sweating and had slight chest pains. They weren’t too severe. I didn’t give too much thought to them. After about a week of it I decided it was probably best to see a doctor. It wasn’t a difficult decision, easy to hide because our tour was going to Lexington for two nights. I scheduled an appointment and my doctor could get me in immediately. He was very concerned and that scared me. Was something wrong with my heart again? Did I have some sort of disease? Did another hole form in my heart? Those were the questions that raced through my mind. I thought he would just proclaim it something small and simple, but I was in for the surprise of a lifetime. My doctor ran several tests and used a stethoscope to listen to my heart. He had me schedule another appointment for the next day, he wanted to look over my results and give me the diagnosis the next day. Needless to say I was scared to death. I tried to convince myself that everything would be okay. Tried to tell my self that all the test results would come out negative. I knew very well that I was lying to myself. I was in denial. No one wakes up at night with night sweats and chest pains, and is constantly tired. Something was wrong with me. If it was something, I decided right then and there that I would hide it from my friends, family, and my wife. I didn’t want everyone to worry about me. Little did I know that, that was probably the biggest mistake of my life, hiding it from everyone. Sure enough my doctor gave me my diagnosis. Another hole had formed in my heart. He said it was still growing, but not rapidly. In fact it was growing very slow. Doctor Lane also informed I could hold off surgery, but no longer then five months. Determined to keep it from the others, I walked into the arena with a smile on my face, inside though, I was terrified.

 

 

Nick’s POV

 

Wow, where do I begin? My life started going down hill a few months back. I was constantly in fights with my parents and my siblings. They would yell at me for not coming home from the tour when I said I would. They had absolutely no idea. It seemed that every time I made plans with my family something would happen to change them. Don’t get me wrong I love my life, very much. Everything was getting to the point where everyone was falling apart. By everyone I mean A.J., Brian, Howie, and Kevin. Slowly we were all verging self-destruction in one way or another. When everything and everyone started to fall apart I fell into my own depression. Thinking I had the worst problems in the world. In reality though there were two other people going through even worse problems then me.

 

There are two things I would have to say I regret one is that I was way too wrapped up in my own problems to really help anyone else. I asked concerned questions to all four of my friends at one point or another, but never bothered to really dig deep enough to find out what was going on. A.J.’s of course was quite obvious to everyone. He had lost Taylor. Everyone decided to let him be alone. Not bug him about it; let him bring it up. Big mistake. We had an obligation to be there for him. I also regret the petty arguments and fights I had with them. Most of them started by me. How selfish I was. I hate myself for some of the things I said to them. You know what they say “don’t live in the past.” It’s hard not to when you feel so guilty. Ya know what I mean? Blaming all four of them for all of my problems. Why? I don’t know. It was just the easiest way to do it. Blame it on people who had too many problems of their own to worry about mine. Now I have learned. I have been taught a very valuable lesson. Just as A.J. says never ever take things, in my case people, for granted.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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