“Jane?”
Jane
Carter flinched as the voice of her ex-husband, her betrayer invaded the
airwaves. She held the phone slightly away from her ear as if it smelled bad,
“Bob,” she replied flatly.
“How
are...”
“Don’t
start with small talk Robert, what do you want?” Jane’s voice was strained, her
mind over a thousand miles away, in Florida.
She
heard him sigh, “Fine. Why is Nick off tour, and where are Leslie and
BJ?”
Jane
sighed and massaged her temples, “They’re in Florida Bob. All three of
them.”
“Why?
And why is Nick off tour?”
“Bob
you sure do ask a lot of questions, why do you care so much all of a sudden? A
guilt trip? Do you finally feel guilty for deserting your family? For
making your oldest son feel like he’s inadequate?” Jane spat her words
angrily through the phone, “Well it’s too late for that Robert! The damage has
been done! Our kids are already ruined!”
“IT’S
MY FAULT!” she heard Bob begin to rage, “How is my fault that the judge decided
to give you custody of MY kids! You’re the one who was around them to corrupt
them...”
“Around
them? Around is the word Bob! How often do the kids see you? Only when you’re
not off screwing that bitch, and when’s that Bob... About 2 hours of your
week?”
“Jane,
that’s unfair!”
“Yeah,
to MY children!” Jane yelled, “So you haven’t answered my question Bob... Why do
you all of a sudden care so much?”
Bob
was silent on his end, “They’re my kids too Jane... even though, even though I
haven’t been much of a father I’m trying to make up for that. Jane, Aaron
says he hates me!”
Jane
narrowed her eyes, “Well if you would hang around your kids more often you
would learn that they all share mutual feelings.”
She
could feel Bob’s wince through the phone, she heard him clear his throat,
“Are...Is.... Aaron says if anything’s wrong with Nick he blames me... Jane, is
he ok?”
“Is
who ok?” Jane asked sounding weary.
“Nick,”
Bob said sounding defeated, “I treated him badly, and I’m sorry.”
“You’re
telling that to the wrong person Bob,” Jane said softly, she hung him up, and
leaned back on the sofa. She relaxed her eyes and uncramped her telephone
fingers for a few seconds, then she opened her eyes. She stood up
with a slight groan and grabbed her car keys. She walked to the backdoor
and opened it, then lifted her cream colored suitcase in one hand and exited,
locking the door behind her.
“It
tastes like paste,” Nick complained after taking a timid sip out of a straw
from the nutrient shake BJ was offering to him.
“It’s
good for you,” BJ said setting down the small can, “But if you don’t want this
I can run down and get you some soup...”
She
saw Nick’s expression cloud over at the mention of soup, “You want another
sip?” she raised the can to his lips again and he turned his head. With a
loud sigh he said, “I’ll take the soup.”
“You’ll
what?” BJ turned to stare at Nick wide eyed, “Did you just...?”
“Yes,”
Nick muttered barely suppressing a smile.
“Are
you smiling?” BJ pressed she poked him lightly in the side, she grinned at him
and crawled on the bed beside him. He was smiling, an expression BJ
hadn’t genuinely seen on his face for a long time. Sure she had seen his
drug induced grins, but none of those could compare with the “real” ones.
“Is there an occasion for this rare event?”
This
made Nick laugh slightly, “No.”
“Hold
on, I’ll go tell someone to bring you that soup,” BJ said, she slid off the bed
and opened the door to the room. Howie was sitting in a chair by the
door... there was always someone sitting by the door playing sentinel.
Howie’s brown eyes looked up to BJ, “What? What’s wrong now?”
To
his surprise BJ was all smiles, “Nothing at all... Howie, can you run
downstairs and get Nick some soup. He wants some.”
Howie
nearly fell out of his chair, “What? He what?” He sprang up, “Ok, I’ll be back
in a minute.” Howie bolted for the stairs, and BJ giggled. To
turned to look back at Nick who was now laying on his back.
“What
brought about this wonderful change of heart?” BJ asked coming back to the bed.
Nick shrugged, “It was either soup or paste... what do you think?”
“I
think you be bullshittin’ big bro,” BJ sat down and tapped his kneecap, “What
happened?”
Nick
sighed and sat up slightly to gaze at his sister, “You.”
“Me?”
BJ blinked feeling a bit confused, “What about me?”
“It’s
not just you, it’s Leslie, and Brian, and Kevin, and AJ, and Howie...” Nick was
shaking his head, “You guys have been right here with me for how long? A
long time... You won’t give up until I... well until I do, and start doing
what you say I should. You’re relentless and, and I... I feel it would
only be polite of me to...”
“You
be bullshittin’ again Nicky,” BJ prodded him playfully, making Nick give
another smile, “Ok, ok... I know what you’re trying to do... and well, you guys
would only press this hard if, if you really cared. And until now I
really didn’t care about anything or anyone anymore cause everyone always
seemed like they were out to hurt me in some way. I don’t care how nice
and loving exterior of a person is... they could still betray me, and disown
me. I didn’t want to be hurt anymore, but now I see that you won’t hurt
me. At least not intentionally...”
BJ
felt a tear sliding down her cheek, “I will never hurt you... no one in this
house will ever intentionally hurt you.” She held out her arms to him, they
began to shake as he stared at her with a strange cloudy expression over his
face. She was about to lower her arms when she suddenly felt Nick’s
slight weight throwing itself into her arms. He held on for dear life and
clung to her like a small child. She felt dampness on her shoulder and
rubbed his back as he cried softly, “I’m sorry...” he kept saying to her, “I
let you down so bad BJ...”
“No,”
BJ was whispering into his ears, “You didn’t let me down Nick. You
haven’t let anyone down. Don’t tell yourself that you have.”
There
was a soft knocking at the door. Kevin, Brian, AJ, and Howie entered,
Kevin holding a large bowl of soup, Brian holding a spoon, AJ holding salt, and
Howie holding pepper. BJ almost laughed at them, their eyes were
huge as if they were expecting to see some miracle in the works.
“Awww...”
Brian set the spoon down on the nightstand and crawled onto the bed. He ran his
fingers through Nick’s stringy hair, “What’s going on, kid? We brought you
something to eat.”
BJ
felt the warmth leaving her shoulders and the cold air rushing to greet them as
Nick pulled away from her. He sat back on his pillows and turned to look
at his friends and the full steaming bowl of soup Kevin was holding.
He took a deep breath, “Thanks...”
Howie
was assembling the TV tray and gently putting it over Nick’s legs. AJ began
setting the table. Nick watched on incredulously as Brian spread a
napkin in his lap. By the time Kevin was setting down the soup and adding
salt and pepper to it he was chuckling lightly. The guys stepped back
looking stunned. Could Nick be laughing? Nick looked at each one of
them in turn with an amused smile toying on his lips, “I haven’t received this
good of service since, well no, I have never received such service.”
They
all laughed, “Well get used to it bro, this is the service you’ll get until
you’re all better... Then you’ll have to get your own soup, make your own
table, and add your own salt,” Brian said. They sat in silence
watching each other.
“Soup’s
gonna get cold,” Kevin said softly after a what seemed like an eternity of
silence.
“Oh,”
Nick said. He stared down into the bowl of soup which, if he wasn’t mistaken,
was staring back up at him. He saw his reflection in the rich broth.
It looked as tense as he felt. Could he do this? He reached his
hand out for the spoon. He had some trouble lifting it and instantly he felt
hands cover his own and help him to lift the heavy spoon and guide it over the
bowl. He looked up to meet Kevin’s green eyes and sighed deeply, here
goes. He lowered the spoon into the bowl and spooned up some broth.
Carefully and slowly he brought the spoon to his mouth, with Kevin’s help
of course and took a sip. He wanted to spit it out. Every cell in his
body screamed, every taste bud squealed out in displeasure. No! No! He
swallowed. The hot liquid traveled down his throat warming his cold body.
He took another small sip from the spoon, then another until the
spoonful was gone.
AJ
wanted to ram the spoon in his mouth, to grab the spoon and quickly start
feeding him more. Nick ate so damn slow, and every few minutes he would
have to set the spoon down and rest. Howie began to make small talk to
draw attention away from Nick, not wanting him to feel self-conscious. AJ
tried to keep up with the pointless conversation while counting how many
spoonfuls of soup Nick was ingesting. He was up to 6. BJ squeezed
his arm and offered some encouragement. Nick was shaking his head telling
her that he couldn’t eat anymore. AJ cursed to himself and turned
away from Howie and Brian’s conversation and crawled beside Nick who was shaking
and trying to shrink away from the food. “Come on Nick, a little more,”
AJ said rubbing the thick baggy sleeves of Nick’s sweatshirt. The
sweatshirt was winter clothing and much too hot for being inside a house,
especially one in Florida, but still Nick shivered, “it’ll warm you up.”
Tears
had begun to sneak down Nick’s face as his stress over the situation showed.
“I can’t.”
“Yes
you can,” Kevin said soothingly, “Lets just pick up the spoon and start over
like we...”
“What
the hell’s that?”
There
was the sound of a bickering female voice from downstairs. Leslie’s voice
could be heard trying to calm the domineering woman’s voice. AJ, Howie,
Kevin, and Brian all stared at each other wondering who that could be
downstairs, but one glimpse at the two pale frozen Carters in the room with
them.
“What
the hell is Mom doing here?” BJ asked.
Mom?
Jane Carter? AJ could feel his eyes rolling up towards the heavens.
Why did it have to be her?
Jane
Carter would surely ruin everything!