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A very drunk John Sheppard and Rodney McKay sat in the empty lounge. They'd been hitting the Athosian whiskey pretty heavy and were two sheets to the wind and a bed full of pillow cases too.

Suddenly John turned to Rodney and started singing. "Here we are, dear old friend. You and I drunk again. Laughs have been had and tears have been shed maybe the whiskey's gone to my head, but if I were gay, I would give you my heart! And if I were gay, you'd be my work of art! And if I were gay, we would swim in romance! But I'm not gay. So get your hand out of my pants."

Rodney pulled his hand out of John's pants with a pouty sulky look.

John continued to sing. "It's not that I don't care, I do! I just don't see my self ...in you. Another time another scene I'd be right behind you if you know what I mean? Cause if I were gay I would give you my soul! And if I were gay I would give you whole..being. And if I were gay we would tear down the walls! But I'm not gay so won't you stop cupping my b...hand."

Once again Rodney pulled his hand out of John's pants sulking about it.

Still John sang on. "We've never hugged! We've never kissed! I've never been intimate with your fist! But you have open brand new doors! Get over here and drop... your... drawers!" Rodney didn't hesitate for a second in dropping his pants and commencing with the hot monkey sex.

Thank god they were drunk since thoughts of lube never got anywhere near their minds.

But still a great time was had by both.

Now if only they could remember anything the next morning....

The End.

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