Ahem. Ok a Warning for this chapter. There's.....badness. I'm warning you now stop reading if you have issues with VH1 and Awesomely Bad Songs and/or Disney!! I've warned you so now you can't sue me if you need therapy after reading this!!! I ain't payin' your therapy bills people so you better listen!
---
Only three days after Aphrodite came up with the idea to throw Dru a party she'd already put everything into motion and gotta the party going.
Dru lurked in a... ok bright, since darkness seemed to not exist around here, corner sulking. She hadn't been able to kill or destroy anything since Aphrodite had been true to her word and not a hint of pastels, lace, or frills were any where to be seen at the party. It was done in various shades of red and dark, dark pinks with purples thrown in for variety. It was actually pretty nice and and Gods from the War house had nearly fallen over in shock at how non-blinding and painfully cheery the place was.
Dru had suffered though being introduced to god after god after goddess after goddess for what seemed like thousands of deity's. It was mind boggling how many gods there were! And there was no way she'd remember even half of thous she didn't already know from Xena, Hercules and fanfic. After meeting everyone she'd has to get away for a while. It was all just getting over whelming again. This being a goddess and being stuck in what should only be a TV show and meeting characters she'd always loved and now knew in real life. Freaky.
It'd only been a few hours but people were already starting to get sloshed. Purely amazing how fast these people worked!
Suddenly a evil thought hit her. "No. No it's too wrong! It'll screw up the space time continuum! It'll bring down forces of evil unknown to this time! But...I can't resist!" Dru mumbled to her self. She made her way across the room dodging gods and goddesses and picked a perfect spot for her wicked plan.
She nibbled a nail thinking about how to go about her idea. She glanced around then focused on what she wanted. She giggled lightly as what she wanted appeared. She glanced around again to make sure no one watching yet and continued making what she was picturing in her mind. Within a minute she had everything she needed to bring force a new force of evil to the Ancient world.
She snickered then turned to face the room and tapped her mic. "Ahem! Ladies and gentlemen! I'd like to introduce you to a little something from my time! And since most of you are tipsy already this is the perfect time! Everyone I'd like to introduce you to.... Karaoke!"
She almost expected thunder and lightning to strike as she said the word like in TV shows but all she got was a lot of strange looks. She sighed and gestured. "THIS is a Karaoke machine! On this screen the words to the song you're singing appear incase you don't know them, you sing into this doohickey I'm talking into, and your voice and the music comes out these boxes here, here and here!" More confused looks. She sighed then flipped though the listing of songs, really any song that existed since SHE made it and she was a goddess, trying to pick out the perfect song to use to introduce Karaoke to the Gods.
She nearly giggled her head off as she picked out a perfect song for this crowd. She quickly hit it up to play then spun to the crowd ready to sing. "Ok this song I'm going to sing was originally done by The Weather Girls and it's called It's Raining Men." She snickered as she was a lot of interested looks at the title. "Humidity is risin�
Barometer�s gettin� low, uh-oh
According to all sources
The street�s the place to go
�Cause tonight for the first time
Just about half past 10
For the first time in history
It�s gonna start raining men
It�s raining men, hallelujah
It�s raining men, amen
I�m gonna go out, I�m gonna let myself get
Absolutely soaking wet
It�s raining men, hallelujah
It�s raining men, every specimen
Tall, blond, dark and lean
Rough and tough and strong and mean
God bless mother nature, she�s a single woman too
She took on the heavens, and she did what she had to do
She fought every angel, she rearranged the sky
So that each and every woman, could find the perfect guy
Humidity is risin�
Barometer�s gettin� low
According to all sources
The street�s the place to go
�Cause tonight for the first time
Just about half past 10
For the first time in history
It�s gonna start raining men
It�s raining men, hallelujah
It�s raining men, amen
It�s raining men, hallelujah
It�s raining men, amen
It�s raining men, hallelujah
It�s raining men, amen
It�s raining men, hallelujah
It�s raining men, amen
It�s raining men, hallelujah
It�s raining men, amen
It�s raining men, hallelujah
It�s raining men, amen!" She'd gotten really into it as she was singing and had to snap her self out of it slightly as she finished and she looked out at the crowd she looked like they'd enjoyed it. Well that and whispering about when had Gaea done this and why hadn't they hear about it.
"Ok boys and girls! You're turn! Just grab this book here and pick out what you want to sing then to wild!" She bounced away from the Karaoke machine as gods and goddess elbowed each other out of the way to get to the book.
Strife grinned wildly at her as she made her way over to him and Cupid. "Why do I have a feelin' that this is gonna be a major source of powa fah me from now on?"
Dru batted her eyes innocently at him "Why Strife have have NO clue what you are implying! None at all!"
Cupid snorted. "Thank you SO much Dru. I can see where going to have a new torture at all family gatherings from now on thanks to you! And ugh! This is gonna leak down to the mortals I just know it! You've destroyed life as we know it!"
Strife laughed harder then they all turned as they saw Apollo had beat his way to the top and was getting ready to sing. "Hey everyone! As The God of Music Of COURSE I should be the first one to get to try this thing out and I found JUST the prefect song that CLEARLY one of my worshipers wrote it for me in the future! So here it is me singing Right Said Fred's I'm Too Sexy!
I'm too sexy for my love too sexy for my love
Love's going to leave me
I'm too sexy for my shirt too sexy for my shirt
So sexy it hurts
And I'm too sexy for Milan too sexy for Milan
New York and Japan
And I'm too sexy for your party
Too sexy for your party
No way I'm disco dancing
I'm a model you know what I mean
And I do my little turn on the catwalk
Yeah on the catwalk on the catwalk yeah
I do my little turn on the catwalk
I'm too sexy for my car too sexy for my car
Too sexy by far
And I'm too sexy for my hat
Too sexy for my hat what do you think about that
I'm a model you know what I mean
And I do my little turn on the catwalk
Yeah on the catwalk on the catwalk yeah
I shake my little touche on the catwalk
I'm too sexy for my too sexy for my too sexy for my
'Cos I'm a model you know what I mean
And I do my little turn on the catwalk
Yeah on the catwalk on the catwalk yeah
I shake my little touche on the catwalk
I'm too sexy for my cat too sexy for my cat
Poor pussy poor pussy cat
I'm too sexy for my love too sexy for my love
Love's going to leave me
And I'm too sexy for this song!" Apollo finished with a flourish then frowned when everyone collapsed in laughter rather then clapped.
Dru lay on the floor holding her sides wheezing from laughing.
Apollo huffed and stalked away from the Karaoke machine pouting. Apollo getting laughed off the stage didn't stop the others from pouncing on the book to fight it out for the next place.
Dru was still struggling to breath enough to keep from turning blue when Zeus battled to the top. "Ahem! I'd like to take this chance to think our lovely new Goddess of Debauchery for this wonderful thing from her own time! And Now I shall sing a song titled 2 Live Crew- Me So Horny. (A/N: WARNING! NC17 lyrics!!! Zeus has naughty, naughty tastes in songs!! And by the way I had NO idea how filthy this song was till I Googled it for the lyrics!!!! The bleeping on TV really hides the filth!!! Click Here to skip the lyrics )
What do we get for ten dollars? Every ting you want. Everything?
Every ting!
Sittin' at home with my dick on hard, I got the black book for a freak to call.
Picked up the telephone and dialed the seven digits.
Yo this is Marquis baby, are you down with it?
I arrived at her house, knocked on the door.
Not having no idea of what the night had in store.
I'm like a dog in heat, a freak without warning.
I have an appetite for sex 'cause me so horny.
Oh, so horny....Ohh, so horny...Ohh, so horny.
Me love you love time.
Oh, so horny....Ohh, so horny....Ohh, so horny.
Me love you long time
Girls always asking for a fuck so what what's wrong dingy dog with the queen mutt?
'Cause you're the one and you shouldn't be mad.
I won't tell your momma if you don't tell your dad.
I know he'll be disgusted when he sees your pussy busted.
Won't your momma be so mad if she knew I got that ass.
I'm a freak in heat, a dog without warning.
My appetite's for sex, 'cause me so horny.
You can say I'm desperate.
Even call me perverted, but you'll say I'm a dog when I leave you fuckin' deserted.
I'll play with your heart just like it's a game.
I'll be blowin' your mind while you're blowing my brain.
I'm just like that man they call Georgie Frickin' Pie.
I'll fuck all the girls in Dodge and make 'em cry.
I'm like a dog in heat, a freak without warning. I have an appetite for sex 'cause me so horny.
Oh, so horny....Ohh, so horny....Ohh, so horny.
Me love you long time
Oh, so horny....Ohh, so horny....Ohh, so horny.
Me love you long time
It's true you were a virgin until you met me. I was the first to make you hot and wetty wetty.
You tell your parents that we're going out. Never to the movies, just straight to my house.
You said it yourself. You like it like I do. Put your lips on my dick and suck my asshole too.
I'm like a dog in heat, a freak without warning. I have an appetite for sex 'cause me so horny.
Oh, so horny....Ohh, so horny....Ohh, so horny.
Me love you long time
Oh, so horny....Ohh, so horny....Ohh, so horny.
Me love you long time
Fuckin' suck me....Fuckin' suck me...Fuckin' suck me...
Fuckin' suck me...Fuckin' suck me...
Fuckin' suck me...Fuckin' suck me...
Fuckin' suck me...Fuckin' suck me...
Fuckin' suck me...
Me so horny....me so horny!" Zeus yelped and ducked the fire bolts that came at his head from many people most notably Hera. "I didn't write the song! I only sang it!" He had to duck again. "Ok ok ok! Sorry! Sorry!"
Dru rolled to her feet and stumbled to the Karaoke machine. "Ok ok I think we've had enough us everyone else for a while! Time for more me! Ahem! Ok time for a favorite of mine! The Spartan Theme Song!
We are the mighty fighting men of Sparta-
And we fly our flag with pride!
We're members of a core
That loves to go to war
And crush crush crush the other side!!!!
Let's have a hearty hip hurray for Ares!!
The fearless founding father of our foe
We'll follow him do or die
'Cause he's- one heck of a guy
Benevolent- brave and bold!!!!
Long ago~ when Sparta was untamed
Awesome Ares pursued a dream
He moved the mountain range
Plowed down the purple plains
And straightened out the wild and wandering stream!!
When bad Bereas blew onto the scene-
Our leader knew what must be done
He spun the winding spin
That broke the brutal wind
And kicked Bereas squarely in the the bum!!!!" Dru cheerfully sang out the Disney song watching as Ares literally fell out of his chair in shock then laughing him self nearly sick.
Dru was in Disney's Hercules mode and didn't feel like giving up the mic just yet. Damn her singing obsessed side! "Ok I'd like to dedicate this one to my great hosts while I've been here! Aphrodite and Cupid!
They're hanging the last decorations .......the punchbowl is filled to the brim.......everyone's manning their stations.............. the band is about to begin.....
APHRODESIA DANCE!!!!
Everybody..... gonna party tonight!!!
APHRODESIA DANCE!!!!
Are you ready- for the time of your life???
Tonight is the night- Cupid's in flight
Aiming his arrows of love
It's everyone's chance- to find new romance
Under the heavens above
Making your move while the music is groovin'
{Excuse me - I don't mean to pry!!??}
APHRODESIA DANCE!!!!
Everybody gonna party tonight!!!
APHRODESIA DANCE!!!!
Are you ready for the time of yer life??
APHRODESIA DANCE!!!!
It's a party starring the Goddess of Love!!!!
APHRODESIA DANCE!!!!
Gonna boogie
At the Aphrodesia Dance................ to-NIGHT!!!"
"Ok My next song is about The dude who's job I now have! Party! Woooo!"
"Lend me your ears!!!!"
It's an open invitation!!!To the finest feast in Greece!!!
It's an awesome celebration........ guaranteed to to disturb the peace!!!
It's a jammin' extravaganza!!!
With a heart-stoppin' conga beat!!!
You don't have to ask directions- No!! just follow your dancing feet!!!
{At the Baccanal- It's a nonstop party!!}
The biggest bash that Bacchus has ever thrown!!
People wall to wall!!! Gonna party hardy!!! We'll boogie to the beat
'Til the sheep come home!!!
Grab a scootch of grape at the fountain
Shake it up and slide down the mountain
.....Strike a pose so Everyone knows yer cool!!!
Grip those hips and join in the conga~
Steal a kiss -scream Cowabonga!!!! Moshpit Meltdown! Everyone in the pool!!
{Me First!!!}
{At the Baccanal- It's a nonstop party!!}
The biggest bash that Bacchus has ever thrown!!
People wall to wall!!! Gonna party hardy!!!
You're sure to have a ball at the Bacchanal!!!!" The truly scary part was the fact that she was stone cold sober this whole time as she went wild singing. Well sober as in she hadn't been drinking. But everyone was fairly positive she was on a power buzz. That or she was just a thundering loony. Either could be equally true.
Cupid pinched the bridge of his nose and stalked up and grabbed her and yanked the mic out of her hand before she could sing again. "Ok Dru why not let someone else play for a while huh? I'm sure everyone can work out an order like the few hundred year old adults they are right?" He said glaring at the other gods as he half dragged her away from the Karaoke machine.
Dru half whined as Cupid dragged her over to a table and shoved her into a chair. "Sit. Stay. Are you positive you haven't drunken anything?! Maybe someone spiked the punch...not surprising with this group!"
"Nope! I haven't even drunken any punch! Just blood! I'm in vampire mode. Just self materialized blood like in the fountains I keep for the vampire... err I mean Bacchae! yes they're called Bacchae in this time..." Dru trailed off pondering the name change in blood suckers over time.
Cupid glared at Strife who was finding all this hilarious. "If it wouldn't be cutting off my nose to spit my own face I'd SO be cutting you off right now buddy!"
Strife snickered and pat Cupid on the shoulder. "Yah but ya would be hurtin' ya self so my nookie ain't in danger so I'm not at all afraid!"
Cupid scowled a very Ares like scowl then reached out and grabbed Apollo as he was walking by. "Hey! Check her out and make sure there's not something wrong with her making her acting nuts!"
"Uh you know I'm sure she's fine and if she's not Ace has to be around here somewhere I'll go look for him... yip!" Apollo yelped when Cupid clamped onto his arm to keep him from leaving.
"Oath to help people Apollo! Check her!"
Apollo flinched as he leaned over her to scan her with his powers and she grinned wolfishly at him and cooed. "You know I'm suddenly just craving warm champane...."
"Uh there's nothing wrong with her. Just a power burst. Her worshipers must be getting really Debaucherious or something. She's fine. I gotta go....somewhere else!" Apollo quickly left leaving Dru snickering after him.
"Uh what was that about?" Cupid asked looking confessedly back and forth between Apollo's rapidly disappearing back and Dru.
"I have no clue. Hey I got a memory like Joxer's hat. Could you point out which guy's Heph? I was thinking of looking into getting some of those Hepaestiain chains. Ya know just to have around." Dru asked trying to sound causal and innocent.
Strife choked and Cupid gawked. "You! What did you do to Apollo?! What are you planing to do to Apollo?!"
"Noooothing. I just came up with a little way to keep him from hitting on me non-stop and driving me buggy and it turned out to be a LOT of fun. Who'd a thunk it? Threatening bondage and blood play and riding a guy till he pops then pinning him to a wall and scratching him and licking the blood off his chest while asking about where I can get Hepaestiain chains scares the crap out of a guy!"
Strife fell to the ground howling while Cupid banged his head against the table laughing weakly. "Well I guess you're really getting in touch with your godhood huh?"
"Yup! It's fun! Now about those chains...?" Dru was distracted from her questioning by the next person trying their hand at singing. Athena.
"We don�t have to take our clothes off
To have a good time , oh, no
We could dance and party all night
And drink some cherry wine, uh-huh!"
Everyone in the room stared in disbelief and shock. "Duuuude... Maybe I shouldn't have bought that Karaoke machine after all...."
********************
Click Here to go back to the Fanfiction Page or to any other part of the site.