Enjoy the Silence
by Cariann

They sat in silence. The slayer and the vampire.

Buffy tried not to glance over at Spike sitting next to her. She didn�t know why he was still there not that she wanted him to go. Him being there was strangely comforting, but his intention had been to obviously kill her. He had come upon her crying on her back porch. He had been carrying a shut gun, but the sight of it didn�t even phase Buffy. She didn�t know why. Maybe Spike was right. Maybe she wanted to die. Maybe she was in love with it, craved it, and needed it.

But he hadn�t shot her. Instead he had asked her if there was anything he could do. He had tried to comfort her, and while his awkward pat on the back had done nothing to comfort her his intention had. It was against his nature, who he was, so that the awkward gesture had done something to her.

The whole night had done something to her. Something she couldn�t even begin to comprehend. She had thought she knew Spike, but she didn�t know him at all. She thought she knew herself, but she didn�t know a thing about herself, or being the slayer. This night�s events had made one thing clear to Buffy the world she thought she knew wasn�t the world she lived in, and now her mother.

Buffy sighed, and Spike stole a glance at her. Her tears had stopped, but the pain had not lessened. Spike didn�t know why he didn�t just leave. He was probably the last person she wanted to see right now, but yet she didn�t tell him to go away. Maybe she didn�t have the strength. This was a side of the slayer he had never seen. She was broken. Something had happened, and it wasn�t what happened between them earlier.

What did happen between them earlier? He knew he had felt this indefinable attraction, and spark. He had felt it coming from her. And as much as she had hurt him, in a way that she would never fully understand, Spike couldn�t deny it anymore. He loved her.

Spike had always had a thing for slayers. He was attracted to them, lured in by them, and fascinated by them, but this was different. This went further than her being the slayer.

Buffy shivered as the cold night air pierced her sweater. She wrapped her arms around her body tighter trying to fend off the cold. She didn�t want to go inside yet. She didn�t want her mother, or Dawn to see her like this. She had to be the strong one. She had to be the strong one for them. Buffy didn�t know if she could be strong enough for the both of them, but she had to try.

Spike stood up, and Buffy quickly turned to look up at him surprised that she didn�t want him to go. Spike shrugged off his duster.

�You�re cold,� he said quietly as he draped the duster over Buffy�s shoulders.

Buffy stared up at him in shock. She didn�t understand why he was being nice to her not now not after everything that had happened. Not just this night, but all the nights before too.

Spike stared back into her eyes. He wasn�t sure if he should just leave, or sit back down. He knew what he wanted to do. He wanted to wrap his arms around her, and tell her it would be okay. He wanted to be the one to kiss away her tears, and make everything better, but the slayer would never allow him to be that person.

Buffy tore her eyes away from Spike�s. She couldn�t think about this now about how he made her feel. She had to think about her mother, and how she could fix that. Could she fix that?

Spike watched her avert her eyes from his, and took a step back. Buffy saw his movement out of the corner of her eyes.

�My mother,� she whispered.

Spike stopped, and waited. He was intently taking her in, trying to read her. He had always been able to read her, but this was different. She was in so much pain.

�There�s something wrong with my mother. She has to go to the hospital for these tests.� Buffy paused and Spike waited. �There may be nothing wrong,� Buffy looked up at Spike fresh tears in her eyes, �but what if there is?�

Her tears broke Spike�s undead heart. He sat back down, and hesitated for a moment before wrapping his arm around her shoulders in comfort.

Buffy doesn�t pull away, and as strange as it should be she just rests her head on his shoulder. Silence descends on them again, but this time neither was really thinking about anything, but rather just enjoying the silence.

The End

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