In this life I'm a woman...

In my next life, I'd like to come back as a bear.
When you're a bear, you get to hibernate. You do nothing but
sleep for six months. I could deal with that.

Before you hibernate, you're supposed to eat yourself stupid.
I could deal with that, too.

When you're a girl bear, you give birth to your children (who are
the size of walnuts) while you're sleeping and wake to partially grown,
cute cuddly cubs. I could definitely deal with that.

If you're a mama bear, everyone knows you mean business. You
swat anyone who bothers your cubs. If your cubs get out of
line, you swat them too.
I could deal with that.

If you're a bear, your mate EXPECTS you to wake up growling.
He EXPECTS that you will have hairy legs and excess body fat.

Yup... gonna be a bear. Definitely gonna be a bear.

***

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