Black Tears
Author: Deah
Category: Other
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: Original Characters and Storylines are the property of Warner
Bros, Jason Katims Productions, Twentieth Century Fox, FOX, Regency
Television and Melinda Metz.
Summary: The story takes place 22 years into the future. It features the
Roswell characters & their kids.
Writers Note: Feedback is great (bad or good)
Isabel stared blankly into the mirror as she put on her earrings. She always
hated black. Tears slid down her face, she didn't even try to wipe them away.
Let them stay, she weakly thought, it was the only proof that this was really
happening. Her mind had shut down two days ago.
Alex walked in and cleared his throat. She glanced back at him. He looked pretty
miserable himself. A fresh flood of tears came. Her mom had been ecstatic when
she first started dating Alex. She didn't get it then, but now that she was a
mother she knew. It was relief. The knowledge that you're daughter was with
someone that wouldn't intentionally wound her. Her mom had always been
protective of her like she was of Lexi now.
"Is, it's time to go." Alex quietly told her.
She nodded her head soberly. This is it, this was the last time she was going to
see her mother. It came crushing down on her again. She wobbled a little, but
Alex grabbed her elbow. She leaned on him. How was she going to get through
this. Oh, mom...you never even knew...
"The flowers...I forgot the flowers." She mumbled, her voice hoarse
from crying.
Alex wiped a fresh tear from her face. "I took care of it."
They walked out to the car. She was glad that Michael and Maria had offered to
let the kids stay with them. She didn't want them to see her like this. Alex had
understood that she needed to be alone and that when she snapped at him, that it
was really the pain talking...she was afraid the kids wouldn't get that.
The ride to the funeral home was a blur. She stood before her mother's casket,
one arm around Max's waist. Why hadn't she told them about the Cancer? Why would
she do this to them? She angrily thought as she stared at her face. Her body
convulsed with sobs. I'm so sorry, mom...she bent down and kissed her mother's
cheek. She felt Max pull her back. She looked up at his face, tears filled his
eyes. Oh, this was real! Mom is gone. She buried her face in her brother's
shoulder. She felt her dad join the hold.
Alex stood with Liz, watching Isabel, Max and their dad comforting each other.
He had never seen Isabel like this. He sighed. Liz didn't look so good either.
Her eyes were red and puffy.
"He feels guilty," Liz announced after a long silence.
"So does Isabel."
Liz shook her head. "It's not the same, Alex. She wanted to tell her. It
was Max that stopped her. He thinks he was wrong and that Isabel will never
forgive him for keeping the secret from her," she paused, "will
she?"
Good question. Max and Isabel were tight, tighter than most siblings considering
the circumstances, but the amount of anger Isabel had been displaying, when she
managed to talk, worried him. She was blaming herself for the time being. He had
been wondering if she would turn it on Max.
"Yeah..yeah, I'm sure she will, Liz. She's just really upset. She's angry
that Diane never told them."
"Dad?" Alex turned around. Lexi and Parker were standing next to him.
"Can we come home tonight?" Parker asked. Should he give them
permission? Isabel was still too distraught to handle this. Maybe the kids would
snap her out of her funk.
"Yeah, sure." He patted Parker's back.
Lexi grabbed Parker's hand and they went to join their mother. Alex noticed that
she tried to smile but it died on her lips.
That night, in bed, Isabel moved about restlessly. She glanced at Alex. He was
asleep. She wanted to talk to him...needed to talk to him. She couldn't do it
while the kids were around and he was so exhausted he fell right to sleep. She
envied him. Every time she closed her eyes, the vision of her mother the last
time she saw her appeared. Isabel, she had said, take care of Max and your
father if anything should happen. Why hadn't she grasped the weight her words
had carried?
She looked at Alex again. All right, he can't come to me...I'll go to him, she
concluded. She rested her head back on the pillow, focusing her attention on
Alex's face. It wasn't uncommon for her to dreamwalk into Alex's dreams when she
was upset. They could talk there without being interrupted or overheard. Plus,
she could always be candid in dream state.
Before she stepped into his dream orb, she noticed Max's orb floating nearby.
She thought a quick peek into it might calm her down before she approached Alex.
She stepped in without hesitation. He was dreaming about her. Actually, the
dream looked familiar. They were teens at the old quarry. She was begging him to
tell their mom. Oh God, Isabel thought, he thinks I'm going to blame him. It
isn't enough that mom is dead, but he is resurrecting old demons to worry about.
She made her way to her brother and touched his shoulder lightly. When he
turned, he grew in age.
"Is, I'm sorry...I should have let you..."
"The past is the past, Max. Let it die with mom. There's nothing we can do
to change it."
"But it's my fault. You wanted to tell her." A tear rolled down Max's
face.
Isabel hugged him. "Would it have changed anything? She loved us, Max,
that's all that matters. She gave everything she had." They clung to each
other. "We have dad. That's what's important now."
"We should have told her," he paused, "I should've told
her."
"Maybe," Isabel conceded, "but blaming yourself won't do any
good."
"Aren't you? Blaming yourself, that is."
He had hit the nail on the head as only Max could do. What could she say? She
had been blaming herself...more than blaming...outright hating herself for not
telling their mother the truth.
"I won't if you won't." She weakly smiled, letting go of him. He
returned her smile, but it disappeared quickly.
"Do you think she knew how much we loved her?"
Tears crawled down her cheeks. "Max, I loved her as much as any real
daughter could. I loved the way she smelled, the sound of her shoes tapping
against the floor, her wild cooking nights when dad was away, the way she
worried about us, I loved her for saving us, for giving us a real home...I want
my mother, Max!" She openly cried now. Long, ragged sobs came from her.
"I want her, too, Isabel." Max admitted through his own grief.
She managed to pull herself together. Her mother wouldn't want this. She had
promised to take care of Max and dad. Dad...he was the one who needed her
attention.
"I'm going," she announced.
Max nodded as if he had came to the same conclusion. She wanted to be with Alex
right now. She loved Max with all her heart, but their combined grief was too
much.
She walked out of his dream orb and into Alex's. He was having a reoccurring
dream where he was lying on the beach at night, looking up to the stars. She sat
down next to him. They did this so often that he didn't even flinch at her
arrival. He just put his arm around her shoulder and drew her close.
"It'll be ok, Is." He reassured her.
"I miss her, Alex."
"You don't need to. She's right up there, looking down at you." Just
then a star twinkled in the sky. "It doesn't matter to her that you are an
alien. She just wants you to be happy. It's all she ever wanted."
Isabel sighed as Alex turned to her and kissed her forehead. He was right. He
was always right. "I love you. I don't say it enough, but I do."
"Well, if you didn't then that hefty wedding ring and two kids later would
be the wrong time to let me in on it."
She laughed. "The ring isn't that big."
"Look, you picked out the biggest one in the jewelry shop. The guy broke
his arm putting it in the box." He smiled at her. He had done it. He always
managed to do it.
The End