King Kong Versus Godzilla, 1962, Japanese/American, Toho, 91 minutes (U.S. version), color. Directed by Ishiro Honda. Cast includes Tadao Takashima, Kenji Sahara, Yu Fujiki, Ichiro Arishima and (U.S. version) Bryan Morrow (newscaster), Harry Holcomb (Dr. Arnold Johnson). Schlock-Meter rating: Five stars out of 10.
Wow. This is one bizarre film. It's mind-boggling, it's so bad at times, and the plot is so harebrained that you'd swear it came from early Haight Ashbury hippies stoned out of their minds on acid. But of course that's not the case. It's just another so-bad-it's-hilarious nonsense monsterfest from the creative minds at Toho. In fairness to Toho, however, this review covers the U.S. version: the actors imported were just as bad as their Japanese counterparts.
Dig this plot. Godzilla, for some reason, has resurfaced. A scientist theorizes he has awakened. Godzilla threatens Tokyo. Meanwhile, a scientist discovers a non-addictive narcotic berry-like substance found only on a primitive island. The natives make a syrup out of it. They feed it to their God, a huge creature that resembles an ape. Get it? Anyway, a maniacal pharmaceutical executive (Arishima) sends two corporate stooges to the island. A cute Japanese girl stows away. After Kong gets stoned on the berry juice and passes out, the stooges return with the berries and Kong. Meanwhile, Godzilla continues to terrorize Japan. The powers that be decide to match Kong with Godzilla. Somewhere in between a giant octopus terrorizes the island. Oh, also, in a blatant rip off from the original, Kong gets the hots for the cute Japanese girl and grabs her. However, he can't control himself, drinks the berry juice, and passes out.
I won't give away the ending, but will say that the battle royale is fun albeit pretty pathetic, even by Toho's then very low budget standards. Kong is described as the more intelligent monster, but has only one strategy: to beat his chest and rush clumsily at Godzilla. Godzilla looks as cool as ever, but seems unable to hit Kong with his radiation steam breath. Also, in another infamous Toho addition to the Kong legend, the great ape is made stronger when shocked with electricity.
This U.S. version adds several wooden actors, mostly playing scientists and newscasters, who comment on the plot. Despite the subpar effort, the film is truly funny. There are hilariously bad dubbed lines, bumbling monsters, wretched special effects, several cast members who comically overact, and others who you can clearly see are reading lines from a prompter. King Kong versus Godzilla is best viewed late at night, preferably with a large crowd during a party.