| FILM |
| What kind of film? The film on your teeth? The film on a rock in the bottom of a lake? No! The film that costs millions of dollars to make and ends up being eaten by a hungry VCR. |
| The Back to the Future Trilogy-Ok. There's a flying, time-travelling DeLorean, a psychotic Christopher Lloyd, and incest. Where can you go wrong? Well, by having the psychotic Christopher fall in love and get married and make a freight train travel through time. That's about right. |
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| Animal House-Possibly...scratch that...the best fucking movie ever. Filled with many a great scene...like that scene with the girl with one boob or the time that girl took her shirt off and started making out with Otter. Or better yet, how about the time, Bluto got a ladder and spied on the sorority house and saw all those girls and their boobies?! Whew...Animal House runs like a college to-do list. So far I've eaten a lot in the cafeteria and looked up some skirts. The next thing I'm working on is the uniboob girl. So any ladies with uniboobs, give me a call ;) |
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| A Clockwork Orange-That's right my malenky droogs. Finally a movie with enough ultra-violence to sicken even Charles Manson. Yes, this band of young malchicks, like your precious narrator, go around tolchocking starry baboochkas and raping even starrier baboochkas. So go out and viddy this now! VIDDY IT!! |
| Pink Floyd's The Wall-Call me crazy, but that's a damn nice looking wall you have there, Pink. American Beauty-The best ending of any movie. Plus, there are boobies and dancing bags. Titus-They're there in the pies. In the pies! IN THE PIES! Silence of the Lambs-It rubs the lotion on its skin, it does this whenever it's told. Monty Python and the Search for the Holy Grail-Tim the magician shall aid ye on a magical quest for the holy hand grenade. The Who's Tommy-See it, hear it, feel it. The Blues Brothers-I'm on a mission from God, give me four fried chickens and a Coke and no one gets hurt. The Wizard of Oz-Visit the Dark Side of the Moon when the MGM lion howls 3 times....ooh, creepy. Dogma-See what the Catholic Church doesn't want you to know. Jay and Silent Bob are really prophets. Mallrats-Three nippled fortune-tellers, Stan Lee, and screwing in elevators. Thank God for Kevin Smith. Space Ninjas-A cross between Luke Skywalker and Bruce Lee, or so it says. One of the funniest pieces of garbage ever made. Dark City-Mini Billy Corgans. Oh, my! |
| An essay on A Clockwork Orange COMING SOON!! |