02/15/02 - Scenario: The Kid comes in and asks his brother, The Jock, to give him a ride to McDonald�s for which he will pay him $2. The Kid then asks me for some change, $2 to be exact. Yea, you got the picture. But, can you picture this? I don�t have $2 only a five dollar bill. The resulting transaction: I ask The Jock if he has $3. He says yes. That means I will pay The Jock directly and The Kid owes me $2. But, The Jock only has $2 after all. So now I am owed $2 from the Kid and $1 from The Jock. What they don�t understand is that I WILL NOT FORGET THIS. They will pay ... they will pay. Or, maybe I just funded the trip to McDonald�s including a $1 tip. Moms WERE born yesterday.
Also recorded for posterity: Ended up giving The Child 50 cents, well why shouldn�t I, I had already funded the trip to McDonald�s. Why 50 cents, I asked? For 25 cent sodas in the machine at the grocery store. One for me, one for my friend, he said. I am now considered generous as I have gone out of my family circle and funded a stranger. The Scientist, who only pops in for minutes these days, got into the act as well. He�s in the middle of buying a car for which his loan will receive an interest rate of only 3.9 if he can prove he�s a graduate of UC Berkeley. Well, never mind that he never took the time to go back and get
the actual diploma. But now he needs proof and for some reason I�m the only one who can solve his problem as I felt it necessary to keep a copy of the commencement program and the �phony� certificate they wrapped up with a black ribbon to look like they were handing out diplomas at the ceremony. But the problem becomes mine as I haven�t a clue as to which pile of �mementos� (better known as clutter) this phony certificate is buried in. My moon must be traveling in the realm of Jupiter (the god of luck) as I found both specimens in the first pile I randomly picked from. If I could have remembered several other items I had been looking for lately it would have been sweet as I appeared to be on a roll. I wondered out loud why I couldn�t remember and The Jock said it was because I am old (51). Well, if I�m old now, I pondered out loud again, what will I be at 81? Dead, chimed The Child.
I�m speechless now. |
