As the Digi-World Turns
Part IV: Kindness
Tai woke up Sunday bright and early despite how long he stayed up the previous night.
Yamato. I need to call him. I should probably wait til about noon. He is probably still asleep.
Tai got to work cleaning the apartment. He whistled Hi-ho Hi-ho it�s off to Work We Go as he merrily cleaned. Mom and Kari woke up about two hours later to an immaculate home and a warm breakfast.
"Good morning mother. Good morning sister. I just thought I�d start you off right on this splendid day!"
"Oh what a great son!"
"What�s into you?"
"Well I know I have been acting like a prick lately and I just wanted to do something nice to make up for it! Now sit, sit and eat, eat!"
Tai served up bacon and eggs and biscuits and gravy. Tai�s mom was beaming from ear to ear while Kari just stared at Tai suspiciously.
"So, brother what�s really up?"
"What? Can I not show my dear family a little love."
"Kari, don�t ask questions. Just eat for momma."
Breakfast conversation was light. After it was over mom and Kari went to run errands and Tai cleaned the kitchen.
"Hi-ho, Hi-ho. shit! It�s noon!"
Tai rushed to the phone and dialed a very familiar number. The phone rang and rang. There was no answer.
Guess he�s still asleep.
Tai pictured his beautiful friend asleep and giggled.
How sweet. Yamasleepy, Ishisleepy, Mattabulous Sleepy Sleeperboy!
Tai continued to clean up and dial the number, play video games, dial the number, look at pictures of Matt, dial the number, think of Matt, dial the number, think of Matt naked, dial the number.
"Where the hell is he? It�s five already!"
"Taichi! Sweetie. I�m back and we need to hurry if we are going to make it to your soccer game on time."
How the hell am I suppose to play a game with all this on my mind. Of course Yama has never missed one of my games. Surely he�ll be there and I can talk to him after the game. "Coming!"
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Shit! Is it already noon?" Matt pulled himself off the couch and dragged his body over to the ringing phone. The I.D indicated Tai. "What the hell? Does he want to torment me?"
Matt fell back onto the couch belly down. How am I suppose to act around him now that I know how he feels. He thinks I�m a total freak and I�m disgusting to him. That�s a great thought.
Matt pulled himself up into a sitting position. He lit a cigarette and leaned back. As he exhaled he choked.
"No, not this again!"
Matt started gasping and choking and he felt a horrible pain in his abdomen. He fell to the floor and doubled over in pain. He lay on the floor riveting in pain for about 10 minutes and then crawled to the bedroom for his anxiety medication. The doctor had tried everything to rid him of panic attacks and his new miracle cure was Prozac. Matt reached up and grabbed the bottle and downed 2 pills. One had never been enough and 2 barely cut it. Matt, in the floor, leaned against the side of his bed and tried to take deep breaths. He calmed down slightly but needed something else.
"I need Tai dammit! I can�t believe I made a fool out of myself like that! I just can�t face him now. Not for a hell of a long time."
Matt spent the afternoon playing around with his guitar and smoking joints. This would have been an ideal Sunday had it not been for the whole Tai hates Matt thing. The phone rang incessantly with Tai�s calls but Matt refused to answer the phone, even though he badly wanted to. Then the phone rang again and it was someone different.
"Hey man."
"Well you don�t sound very happy."
"Sorry Ken. I have had a rough few days."
"Shit Ken, why don�t you just come over. I could really use a friend."
"Hey, sounds serious. Just stay there and I�ll be right over"
Ken knocked on the door but Matt never came. It was unlocked as usual so Ken let himself in. Once inside, he found Matt laying in the floor with numerous bottles of medication around him. Ken rushed to the floor.
"Matt. Yamato!" Ken slapped at his face. "Wake up. Please."
Matt moaned. "Hey man. What time is it?"
"About 6:00. God you scared me Ishida."
"Oh, hey. I�m sorry."
Ken�s eyes were teary at the thought of loosing his friend.
"Are you crazy or something? How much of this shit did you take?"
"A little more than usual. I was just sleeping and trying to forget."
"Well, you need to be more careful. Take it from me. You never want to over do it on anti-depressants."
Ken Ichijouji was the only person who could relate to Matt on this level. The days following his emperorship were hard and doctors pumped him full of drugs. He and Matt were each others� crutch when it came to panic and depression. None of their friends knew the extent of their chemical reliance's. Matt sat up.
"Hey thanks for coming over."
"No problem. You look terrible. What happened?"
"Well I look terrible because I have slept all day and have not had a shower since sometime yesterday afternoon. I feel terrible for other reasons."
"Hey, tell you what. Let�s get you cleaned up and then we can just make a pot of coffee and talk about all your problems."
"That sounds like a plan."
Matt and Ken walked back to the bedroom. Ken helped Matt out of his shirt.
"Are you loosing weight?"
"I don�t know. Am I?"
"I bet you hardly weigh 100 pounds."
Matt�s eyes teared up.
"I�ve just had a lot on my mind."
Matt walked into the bathroom and closed the door. He turned on the water, took off his pants, and pulled his frail body into the shower. Meanwhile, Ken made some yummy coffee and put on a scratchy yet mellow Rolling Stones record. Matt and Ken shared a love for vintage vinyl. When Matt exited the shower, he put on some drawstring pajama pants and a faded out old Beatles t-shirt that had belonged to his dad. He looked super cuddly. His hair dripped on the floor as he walked across the living room to his oversized chair. He pulled his knees to his chest and Ken brought him a warm cup of coffee. The room was dim and candle light danced on the walls and ceiling. This was familiar. Matt and Ken did this about once a week. They would sit and talk, for they could relate on all levels, drink coffee, listen to music from the 60�s and 70�s, and do bong hits. Matt relaxed at last.
After absorbing the music and the high for about half an hour Ken spoke.
"So Matt. What�s wrong with you?"
Matt explained the whole story while looking up at the ceiling.
"I can�t believe Tai would think that you are disgusting. He is your best friend and I�m sure no matter what you did he will still love you."
"You mean he will still like me. Don�t even mistake Tai�s feelings for me as love. Face it I blew it with him. And get this. He calls me like 15 times today. Probably so he can bitch me out or something."
"Matt. You cannot avoid him. You have to talk to him."
"I just can�t. I am so embarrassed. If I see him I�ll just run away. I hate myself so much and I don�t know what to do!"
Matt broke down sobbing uncontrollably. Ken walked over and knelt beside his friend. He knew what it was like to be rejected by the one he loved. He had to be there for his friend when no had been there for him. He would not let Yamato be alone.
"It�s okay. You can make it through this. You are stronger and better than I ever could be and I made it. Shhh.. Calm down. It will be okay."
Matt scooted down into the floor. They were facing each other. Matt, still teary eyed, collected himself and combed a patch of black hair around Ken�s face and put it back behind his ear. Their sorrowful and tender eyes meet and suddenly there was no one else in the world but them. They slowly and unsurely leaned in. They kissed passionately and forcefully. Matt pushed Ken�s arms down to the floor and kissed him strongly. Both of their eyes were full of tears and laid there kissing for quite some time. Matt on top, Ken on the bottom, the mellow music in the background, high, confused, desperate. They stopped abruptly and looked at each other knowing they were wrong.
"I shouldn�t have taken advantage of the situation."
"You didn�t. It was mutual."
"We can�t do that ever again."
"I know. We can never loose what we have. It would be unhealthy for both of us."
"Yeah. Unhealthy. I should get going."
"No. Please stay. I mean you don�t have to go."
"Well I�ll at least sleep on the couch tonight."
"You can sleep with me. I promise I won�t try that again."
"Are you sure that�s safe."
"Yeah...uh...yeah...I�m sure."
Matt blew out the candles and Ken turned off the music. They walked back to the bedroom. Matt slipped under the covers and Ken took off his shirt and climbed in bed. Matt put his head on Ken�s chest and Ken ran his fingers through his thick blond hair. Matt feel asleep feeling as protected as a newborn baby. Ken continued to pet Yamato�s head.
"Don�t worry my bright angel. I�ll talk to Tai since you won�t and I�ll make things right for you. I can�t bear to see you hurting like this. You are too kind of a person to feel this way. I love you no matter what and I have a feeling Tai feels the same way. I�ll fix it for you Yama, I promise."
Matt just snuggled closer and made cute little Matt sleepy sounds.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Tai looked for Matt in the crowd but to no avail.
"Come on hunny! Time to go home!"
It�s always time to do something with her. Where is Matt? He has never missed a game! I hope he�s alright. I�ll catch a train over there first thing in the morning. I can�t believe I went the whole day without talking to him! This sucks!
"Taichi!"
"Coming!"
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Okay. I had to slip some hot Ken action in this story. I mean who doesn�t think Ken gives Tai a run for his money! Well at least it wasn�t anything too serious! But oh my God! Tai is heading over there 1st thing in the morning! What will he think! Oh the suspense!
Questions? Comments? Write me Ginger Snap