First Place - Action/Adventure


Chapter Thirteen
Hurt and Confused




"Harry Potter."


Harry knew Voldemort had him trapped. Looking around him, he realized he was in Voldemort's version of a throne room. Harry knew the place and recognized it immediately because he'd seen it so many times in his visions.


Voldemort hadn't ever actually summoned Harry to this place, though. He planted visions for Harry, he taunted him in his nightmares, he knew Harry often witnessed things that happened there - but he'd never called Harry there.


Harry couldn't figure out exactly how it was happening, but he knew that it was happening regardless.


"What do you want?" Harry asked defiantly, and was not exactly surprised that Voldemort seemed to hear him. This little communication was new and it was unnerving Harry.


"Harry Potter, I'm so pleased you could meet with me tonight," Voldemort said coldly.


Harry shivered and wondered how he could even feel himself shivering. "What do you want?" Harry repeated.


"I wanted to have a little talk with you," Voldemort said almost casually, and Harry shivered again to remember that this piece of evil used to be a real man - completely human.


"Then talk so I can go," Harry shouted.


"No need to shout, Potter," Voldemort said. "We are the only ones here."


Harry glared at him, the man with the cold red eyes, and hated the fact that he was trapped here and couldn't leave. Harry waited. Let the snake-faced bastard say what he wanted to so he could get out of there.


"I'm quite curious as to why you were dreaming about my right hand man recently," Voldemort said coldly. "How is it that you know about the intricacies between Lucius and his son? What exactly is your concern for the young Malfoy, who will soon be a part of my fold?"


"I'm not telling you anything about Draco," Harry shouted defiantly.


Voldemort looked at him with interest. "It would seem that you are quite fond of Draco. I was not aware that you were even on a first name basis with him. Is there more to this? Or is this just something one-sided for you?"


Harry continued to glare at him, but remained silent. As much as he wanted to shout at Voldemort, he didn't want to give the bastard any more ammunition.


"Hmmm, perhaps I need to learn more about what exactly is going on at Hogwarts this year," Voldemort said musingly. "Perhaps also I need to free Lucius so that he might check personally on his son. I do miss having my right hand man available to me."


Harry continued to keep his silence, glaring defiantly at Voldemort.


"You upset me greatly with that little stunt you pulled," Voldemort said dangerously. "But then, I will have Lucius back. You will never see Black again, so I suppose not all was lost."


Harry could feel the guilt, the anger, the fear - all of it weighing him down heavily. "At least you never got the prophecy," he shouted.


"I was angered that you lost me the prophecy," Voldemort said coldly.


"Yeah, it's too bad you didn't get a chance to hear it, because then you'd know you were fighting a lost cause," Harry snapped recklessly.


Voldemort was beyond furious with that declaration and somehow flung Harry back to his own mind, however that worked.


Harry woke in his own bed, and promptly threw himself to the side, retching, unaware of anything more than the emotions swirling around inside of him, along with the pain flaring hotly from his scar.


Vaguely, Harry felt gentle hands helping to steady him as he emptied the contents of his stomach. Harry moved to swipe the back of his hand across his mouth but a cool cloth was suddenly pressed into his hand. He swiped the cloth across his face instead and tried to sit up again. Gentle hands helped him until Harry was sitting propped up against the pillows.


Gradually becoming more aware of his surroundings, Harry stared blankly at his Potions professor for a moment, uncomprehending that Snape was the one helping him. Harry flinched when he glanced around and realized Draco was sobbing on the other end of the bed, sound beginning to penetrate his overloaded brain.


"Draco?" Harry said hoarsely.


Draco came shooting across the bed to land in Harry's lap. Harry clutched him tightly, still trying to make sense of everything.


"Potter, do I need to summon Dumbledore?" Snape asked quietly, yet demanding an answer.


Harry shook his head, then frantically pressed one of his hands to his forehead. "No, sir," he managed to croak out.


Snape gave him a sharp look, then turned sharply and left the room. Harry just continued to clutch his forehead with one hand and Draco with the other. Snape was soon back and helping to steady Harry as he drank down the potions Snape had returned with. Harry didn't even hesitate to swallow them and didn't notice Snape's slight surprise at that fact.


Within moments Harry could feel the pain easing and his stomach start to calm down again. When Snape handed him a glass of water, Harry drank it down greedily. He was still feeling incredibly shaky, but so much better than he had been.


Harry glanced up at Snape, expecting to be questioned now, but Snape simply nodded his head towards Draco, indicating that Harry should see to him first.


Harry took a deep breath, hoping to calm himself further. He snagged one of the handkerchiefs that were always left on the nightstand.


"Draco, are you all right?" Harry asked quietly.


Draco didn't answer and Harry's heart sank.


"I'm so sorry, angel," Harry said miserably. "I knew this was a bad idea to let you sleep with me."


Draco looked up at him, wide eyes shining with tears. Harry gently wiped away the tears, looking at him sadly.


"I don't want to sleep nowhere else," Draco said shakily in a tiny voice.


"But I'm just scaring you and I don't want to see you scared," Harry said miserably. "It's not right for me to be waking you up in the middle of the night and for you to be seeing me like this."


"But I wake you up at night and you see me cry," Draco said, his little hand reaching up to wipe at the tears flowing down Harry's cheeks that Harry hadn't even realized he was crying.


"It's different, Draco," Harry said quietly. "I'm older and I'm supposed to be taking care of you. And I'm not doing a very good job if I scare you and make you cry."


"It's not different," Draco said, some defiance coming into his voice. "We're supposed to take care of each other. You take care of me, so I can take care of you if I want to."


Harry gave him a slight smile, albeit still sad. "I'm older than you, angel. I'm not supposed to be burdening a four-year-old with my problems."


Draco frowned. "So, because you're older you shouldn't have someone to take care of you? Or do you just have someone else to take care of you 'sides me? Who's supposed to hold you and take care of you when you have nightmares at night?"


Harry looked over to Snape, where the man had seated himself at the end of the bed simply observing them. Harry wasn't sure if he was expecting censure from the man or looking for help in dealing with Draco. Either way he was to be disappointed because Snape's face was a blank mask with no indication of what he was thinking and he wasn't saying anything, helpful or otherwise.


Harry sighed and put thoughts of Snape out of his mind again, trying to figure out how to explain to Draco. "It's complicated, Draco. It's not that I don't want someone to take care of me. I'm just kind of used to not having anyone, so I learned long ago to deal with things the best I could on my own."


Draco was concentrating hard on Harry's words. Harry sighed again and continued. "I don't want you to have to deal with things on your own like I had to, so I want to be here for you when you wake up scared at night. But I don't want you to be scared because of me."


Draco looked a little confused, causing Harry to run a hand through his hair in frustration. "I'm not explaining it well."


Draco's forehead was furrowed in thought. "I get scared, but it's not the same. You don't scare me, Harry. I'm just scared that you're scared like me. And you make me feel safe so I want to make you feel safe, too."


Harry blinked at the small boy, trying to make sense of what he'd said, and not at all sure of what he should say.


Draco looked up at him beseechingly. "Please don't make me go, Harry," he said pleadingly, his lower lip trembling and on the verge of tears again. "Even when I'm scared I feel safe with you. Don't send me away."


"Draco ... ," Harry began.


"No! I don't want to go! I don't care if I get scared when you have nightmares. I have nightmares, too. I understand. I do! Please don't make me go!" Draco said, his tone anxious, scared, worried and pleading all at once.


Harry pulled Draco close again and wrapped him in a tight hug. "Shhh. I'm not making you go anywhere. I'm always going to be right here for you no matter what. I just think maybe you should try sleeping in your own bed is all. I would still be right here for you, but then I could prevent me from waking you up at night."


"But it's lonely and scary by myself," Draco said quietly. "And I wake up lots more when I'm all alone."


Harry sighed heavily. "Then we'll keep trying this a little longer. I don't know how right it is, but ... ," He kissed the top of the little blond head. "How about you just go back to sleep?"


"Are you all right, Harry?" Draco asked worriedly.


"I'll be all right, angel," Harry said softly. "Sleep now."


Draco allowed Harry to tuck him back in and within a couple of minutes he was sleeping soundly again.


"Potter," Snape said as he stood.


"Yes, sir," Harry said quietly, as he slid out of bed. He'd expected to have to talk about the actual vision and there was no way he'd be falling back asleep anytime soon anyway.


He snagged Draco's soft blanket to wrap up in as he followed Snape out to the sitting room. Harry huddled into a corner of the couch, blanket wrapped tightly around him, trying to mentally prepare himself for the inquisition that was sure to come.


He'd managed to block a lot of it out as he dealt with Draco, but now all the feelings and thoughts from the vision with Voldemort were beginning to overwhelm him again.


Snape startled him by settling down on the couch, and Harry looked up at him nervously.


"Describe your vision," Snape said evenly.


Harry closed his eyes and haltingly began explaining everything that had been said and explained that this was the first time it had ever happened quite that way, with Voldemort pulling Harry to wherever he was.


It didn't really take that long, but Harry was a trembling mess again by the time he'd finished explaining it. Thoughts of Sirius, worry for Draco, fear of what Voldemort would do next, anger that Lucius could be released from Azkaban - all of it overwhelming him.


Harry began sobbing and registered he was having a minor breakdown in front of Snape, of all people, but couldn't stop himself. He was exhausted, scar still prickling painfully from Voldemort's anger, and simply overwhelmed.


Still, his eyes flew open as he felt hands grab his upper arms and Harry was too shocked to even struggle as Snape picked him up and bodily placed Harry in his lap, much like Harry did with Draco.


Harry couldn't speak and despite the total irregularity of the situation, he collapsed against Snape's chest, sobbing out his guilt, anger, hurt, frustration and confusion. It may have been Snape holding him, but Harry couldn't really bring himself to care much, because it felt good to have someone holding him and taking care of him for once. Eventually Harry cried himself into an exhausted sleep, still held securely in Snape's arms.


* * * * *


Harry woke a few short hours later, in his own bed, with Draco shaking him.


"Harry, it's time to wake up," Draco said urgently. "Come on, Harry. Sev'rus said you have to wake up now or you'll be late for class."


Harry shot up suddenly as remembered the night before. He swallowed hard. This was likely to be a very long day.


"Hurry up, Harry," Draco said. "Sev'rus helped me get ready and he said not to wake you earlier. But now you have to go fast so you won't be late."


Harry groaned and slid out of the bed to begin hurriedly dressing for the day, before following Draco out to the sitting room. Harry swallowed hard again when he saw Snape sitting at the small table where breakfast was laid out, him and Draco obviously having already eaten.


"Um, sir?" Harry said nervously.


"Do not breathe a word, Potter," Snape sneered at him. "I suggest you grab something quick to eat on your way to classes. You have only twenty minutes before you're late."


"Yes, sir," Harry said wearily. As he grabbed an orange and some toast, he wondered if he'd just imagined Snape's gentleness from the night before. Then there was the fact that he obviously let Harry get a little more sleep this morning, but then sneers at him for running late. The man was confusing him highly.


Harry got the message, though, that he didn't dare bring up the fact that Snape had actually held him the night before as he fell apart. Not like Harry really wanted to talk about it anyway.


* * * * *


Harry and Draco ended up arriving at the Transfiguration classroom with only a minute to spare, their friends already in their seats waiting for class to start.


"Where were you two?" Hermione hissed at him. "We were worried when you didn't show up for breakfast."


"Harry had a nightmare and Sev'rus let him sleep in so then he was almost late," Draco piped up helpfully.


Harry dropped his head to the desk with a loud thunk.


"Snape actually let you sleep in?" Pansy questioned in surprise.


"A nightmare?" Ron asked anxiously.


Harry turned his head slightly and sent a glare in Ron's direction. This was not the time or place to discuss whether it had actually been a nightmare or a vision.


Harry turned his head in the other direction because Draco was tugging on his sleeve. Draco was looking at him worriedly. "It was okay to tell them, wasn't it?"


"If you hadn't, then I suppose I probably would've told them myself," Harry said ruefully.


Draco was reassured but everyone else was shooting Harry worried looks. They didn't have any more time to question him as McGonagall got class started, though.


* * * * *


"I can't believe Snape actually let you sleep in," Pansy said at lunchtime, resuming the conversation from that morning.


"At least you had Binns today, so it was also an easy nap day," Blaise said with a grin.


"True," Harry said, grinning back.


"But still, I can see Snape letting Draco sleep in, but not Harry," Pansy said, sounding bemused still.


"It was kind of a rough night," Harry said quietly.


"When is it not a rough night for you two?" Blaise snorted.


Harry stuck his tongue out at him. "Shut up, Blaise."


The surrounding Slytherins were all snickering at him and his childish behavior.


"And we thought Draco was the child here," Pansy said, amusement lacing her tone.


"But I am the child," Draco piped up, his brow furrowed in confusion.


"Sure you are," Blaise said consolingly, his lips quirking as he tried to suppress his grin. "But you tend to act more mature than Harry does."


"I do?" Draco asked.


Harry rolled his eyes. "Just ignore them, Draco. It doesn't matter how old you are. Everyone should be allowed to behave like a child at least once in awhile."


"Oh, is that why you're so good at playing with my toys?" Draco asked innocently.


Harry flushed lightly as everyone broke out in loud laughter, attracting attention from around the hall.


Harry nudged Draco. "You're not exactly helping me here, angel," Harry said in rueful amusement.


"But why not? You play with me when no one else ever does. I like when you play with my toys with me," Draco said quietly, obviously feeling a little unsure now.


Harry leaned over and kissed Draco on his forehead as he wrapped an arm around him reassuringly. "And I'm going to keep playing with you, no matter what they say," Harry said in defiance.


Draco grinned as the others smiled at the pair of them.


Harry suddenly grinned wickedly, a mischievous glint in his emerald eyes. The others noticed and looked at him warily.


"Perhaps, Draco, we should take some of your toys over to the Slytherin common room this evening," Harry said innocently. "I bet someone would play with you while I work on my assignments. I wouldn't want to deny them a chance to play with toys."


"Really?" Draco asked hopefully.


"Really," Harry said, unable to hold back his wide grin.


"Maybe Pansy could help you with one of your puzzles or Blaise could race some of the cars with you that he helped pick out. Or I bet Crabbe and Goyle could help you build a huge block tower with your big blocks. They are a lot taller than me after all," Harry said, smirking at the Slytherins.


They stared at Harry wide-eyed, unable at first to believe that he'd turned the tables on them so effectively, but with Draco's obvious excitement at the idea, they all smiled ruefully.


"Will you really play with me?" Draco asked excitedly.


"Yeah, you pick out something to bring to the common room tonight and we'll let Harry get some of his work done while we play," Pansy answered with a smile.


"I've been wanting to see those cars I picked out anyway," Blaise added.


Crabbe and Goyle simply nodded their agreement.


"You really should be a Slytherin," Blaise said dryly to Harry.


Harry smirked at him. "I think I would have done pretty well as a Slytherin," Harry said agreeably.


"Does that mean you can wear the Slytherin robes so we can match sometimes?" Draco asked. "I have Gryffindor robes to wear."


Harry wasn't the only one to begin spluttering. "Um, well, I'm not sure everyone would appreciate me wearing Slytherin robes," he choked out.


"But I've got lots of robes and they'd fit you," Draco said innocently.


"But I'm not a Slytherin," Harry protested.


"Blaise said that you should be, though," Draco said.


"I could be a Slytherin, but I'm actually a Gryffindor," Harry tried to explain.


"Why can't you be both?" Draco asked. "We sit at both the Slytherin table and the Gryffindor table every day. So, why can't you wear Slytherin robes some days and other days wear Gryffindor robes?"


"Uh, well ... ," Harry trailed off, not exactly having a good answer for that. What Draco said actually made a bit of sense. "I'm not so sure other people would see it that way. It might upset some people."


The others were listening intently as Harry tried to explain this to Draco.


"Why should they get angry?" Draco asked.


Harry sighed. How did he get himself into these kinds of discussions with Draco all the time? Harry really didn't want to upset the Slytherins that he was actually becoming friends with.


"They shouldn't get angry," Harry said quietly.


"Well, then why would they?" Draco asked, pressing for a better answer.


How do you explain house rivalries to a four-year-old? How do you explain that you're supposed to be the Gryffindor Golden Boy and Savior of the Wizarding World which leaves you with an image to uphold?


Then again, Harry was already breaking tradition just by sitting at the Slytherin table. Already the school seemed to be tolerating that fact pretty well. Everyone knew that Harry was taking care of the four-year-old and seemed to be respecting that fairly well overall. It helped considerably that Harry actually had the support from both Gryffindor and Slytherin houses.


And really, if everyone was respecting Harry's affiliation with the Slytherins overall, why couldn't he take that a little further and show his support of the house by wearing their robes?


Would it really hurt Harry's image? Did he particularly care if it did? People had thought a lot of things about him over the years, including that he was turning to the dark side, but they always came back around eventually, still expecting him to be the hero.


Would it cause a lot of trouble in the school and more fights and duels, though? There were still a few diehards in both houses that had trouble dealing with Harry's affiliation with Slytherin. Would they cause trouble?


Would Gryffindor feel insulted? Would Slytherin feel insulted?


"Harry?" Draco asked tentatively, tugging on Harry's robes.


Harry blinked and focused again on his surroundings, everyone still watching him closely.


"You know what, Draco?" Harry said. "I think you're right. I don't think anyone should be angry, and if they do get angry, I don't really care. I don't have a problem with showing a little Slytherin pride along with you some days. In fact, I feel a bit honored to be a part of both Gryffindor and Slytherin houses."


Draco grinned, but the Slytherins looked gobsmacked at Harry's words.


"Harry, you can't wear Slytherin robes," Pansy protested, her words filled with astonishment.


"Why not?" Harry asked, brows arched.


"Because you're not a Slytherin!" Pansy screeched.


Harry, and all those closest to her, winced.


"He might as well be," Blaise said with a shrug, seeming to warm up to the idea.


"But he's not," Pansy protested, much quieter this time.


"I think he should wear Slytherin robes if he wants to," Goyle said quietly.


Harry whipped his head and gave Goyle a surprised smile for sticking up for him. Crabbe and Goyle rarely ever spoke up that Harry had witnessed.


Harry turned to look at Crabbe, sitting on the other side of Draco. "What do you think, Crabbe?" Harry asked quietly.


Crabbe swallowed nervously. He glanced warily at his fellow Slytherins before looking steadily at Harry. "I think it could help show the rest of the school that maybe we're not so bad as everyone thinks." He swallowed nervously again before continuing. "You're a ... kind of big person in this school. People notice you and all, and already we're kind of being treated nicer." He shrugged uncomfortably.


Harry smiled at him warmly. He was actually becoming quite fond of the two large Slytherins who'd threatened him bodily so many times over the years.


"If you do wear Slytherin robes, we'll be there in case anyone tries to hassle you," Goyle added, his tone threatening anyone who'd dare mess with Harry.


Harry grinned. "Thanks, guys." It was extremely odd being the one on this end of their bullying ways. "Just, let's try not to actually hurt anyone, all right? We want to improve things, not make them worse."


"Whatever you say, Harry," Crabbe said.


Harry glanced back to Blaise and Pansy, and laughed outright at their gobsmacked expressions.


Blaise recovered from his shock first. "Yeah, whatever you say, Harry," he smirked. "We'll be behind you."


"Gods, when did things get so turned around?" Pansy asked in bemusement. "I could have swore Harry was the leader in Gryffindor house, not Slytherin."


"I'm not a leader in Slytherin house at all," Harry said snickering.


Pansy looked at him curiously. "Yeah, well, you're beginning to fool me," she said seriously. "And we're only in the second week of school this year."


"Pansy, I'm not trying to interfere or anything," Harry said, uncomfortable now. "I'm just trying to make the best of things and take care of Draco."


Pansy snorted. "I know that. And if it wasn't for Draco, we wouldn't be sitting here talking to you so easily."


Harry was really uncomfortable now. Once again he was being reminded that these people were only being friendly with him because of Draco's attachment to him. Really, the whole situation had actually gone a whole lot smoother than Harry would have ever expected - if he had ever thought to imagine this scenario.


"I'm sorry for intruding," Harry said quietly, looking down at the table. Harry had been caught up in the conversations and hadn't been eating much. Now he wasn't really even hungry anymore. Why did everyone have to keep reminding him that he wasn't wanted?


He missed the glares that Blaise, Crabbe, Goyle and Draco were directing at Pansy. Draco didn't quite understand what had happened, but he realized it was Pansy's fault that Harry was sad again.


"Harry, I didn't mean that the way it came out," Pansy said, obviously realizing what she'd said and how Harry had taken it.


"No, you're right. We all know why I'm here. I just need to be thankful that you've all taken this whole turn of events so well. This is about Draco, not me," Harry said quietly.


"Harry - " Pansy began.


"No," Harry said, holding his hand up to stop her from saying anything else. "I don't want to talk about it anymore. I obviously needed the reminder of my place here."


Harry really wished that he could just walk away, but he had to remember Draco. "Are you about finished, Draco?"


Draco nodded, looking at Harry sadly, not understanding what had happened, but understanding that Harry wasn't in the mood to answer his questions. He remained silent, getting up and picking up his bag.


"Harry, stay," Blaise said imploringly.


"No, thanks," Harry said quietly. "I've got to go get the assignment I forgot before class starts anyway."


They all knew perfectly well that Harry hadn't forgotten his assignment, and watched him quietly as he left the Great Hall with Draco.

Malfoy's Child - Chapter 14

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