First Place - Angst

Harry no longer needed his lessons with McGonagall, but he showed up at her classroom that Tuesday night anyway. He hadn't had a chance to see her during the day and he wanted the information about the orphaned muggle-born children. They had tea and discussed what Harry wanted to do. McGonagall made Harry swear he would talk to her, his father, Remus, or Dumbledore before he took any action.

One family name was pointed out on the list, Johnson. McGonagall explained that it was the brother and sister-in-law of Angelina Johnson. They had been killed along with their six-year-old daughter, leaving their eighteen-month-old son to be raised by Angelina's parents. She recommended that Harry talk to Angelina before contacting the former Gryffindor's parents.

She told Harry about the day she spent in her cat form watching the Dursleys and how she had disapproved of placing him there. "I am sorry Harry," McGonagall was deeply sad, almost so much as to bring Harry to tears himself. "I should have been more persuasive with Albus. I should have insisted he have more than Ara Figg there to watch over you."

Harry was sitting opposite her in front of the fire in her office, a large scroll of parchment on the table between them. Harry moved forward in his seat and placed a hand over hers, blocking out the majority of the feelings he was sensing from her, as touch made the empathy so much more powerful. Maybe that was another reason he never liked being touched.

"You couldn't have known how bad they really were," Harry looked her in the eye, glad he had found some control and wouldn't trigger a connection. "I don't blame you. I blame them. Who would expect anyone to treat family the way the Dursleys treated me, no matter how unpleasant they are? If I blamed you for the Dursleys who should I blame for my parents, or Cedric, or Sirius?"

McGonagall wiped under her eyes with her free hand, "I am amazed at the capacity you have for love Harry, when you grew up without it."

Harry had started slightly. He didn't see his emotions for Snape and Dumbledore and McGonagall, for Ron and Hermione, as love. He had no idea what love was, except for the deep pain he had felt when he lost Sirius. Could he love without knowing it? Harry pushed any such thoughts out of mind quickly.

It was a short meeting, over when they had drained their tea. Harry took the scroll of names and wandered aimlessly around the castle. Ron was having his strange Occlumency lessons. He was able to play a full game of chess without distraction from any of the tricks Snape thought up. There was definitely some Marauder in his father, though he would never tell him. The ultimate test for Ron had been the week before when Snape had conjured a spider to walk around the chess board.

The sadistic side of his father had considered having spiders crawl around on Ron but Harry had forbidden it. That was just needlessly cruel. His father backed down readily enough and Harry wondered if his father had just been provoking him. They were connected but Harry sometimes found it very difficult to know what the man was thinking.

"Harry!" Hermione ran up behind him, her arms full of books. "Aren't you supposed to be with McGonagall?"

Harry shook his head and grinned proudly, "Nope, all done."

Hermione caught on in an instant and her eyes lit up, "Ooo, you are coming to my room and showing me right now!"

Harry raised his eyebrows at the commanding tone of voice, "Don't you have a bag for all those books?"

"It's full," Hermione explained shortly.

She shifted the books so she could get a hand free and brush a tendril of hair out of her eyes. Ginny had been cutting her hair once a month to keep the short style neat and the only complaint Hermione had was that she couldn't tie it back, but she did buy a number of bands and scarves to keep it from getting the way while studying.

Harry flicked his hand and levitated the books in front of him. Hermione blushed and they walked towards her room together. Hermione had said many times that she still sometimes thought like a muggle.

"Granger, Potter," Malfoy looked up from his own work as they entered. "My condolences for your loss Potter."

Harry stopped short for a moment and then nodded, "Thank you."

People had been touching him softly and giving him their 'heartfelt condolences' for his cousin. The amount of post he got as a result of Dudley's death and the attack on his aunt and uncle was simply ridiculous. Harry was in the process of testing his theory about training Ron and was erecting walls around his memories of the Dursleys to get them out of his life once and for all. Whenever someone stopped him he had to think a moment before remembering what they were talking about.

If Ron was able to group all his thoughts about the brains and the future together he would have a good chance of walling them off from the rest of his mind.

Harry stacked Hermione's books on a chair at her worktable and she grabbed his arm and dragged him towards her room. Harry rolled his eyes and shook his head at Malfoy's bemused expression but he let Hermione lead him.

"Okay Mr. Secretive, I'm not telling anyone about my form, change!" Hermione ordered.

He chuckled but did as she told. Refusing to obey Hermione was easy enough, but not worth the resulting hassle. She rarely gave outright orders, anyway. He flew around her room in a circle before perching on the back of an upholstered chair. He shifted from foot to foot until his weight was settled nicely then ruffled his feathers and cooed softly.

Hermione sighed and came over to inspect him, doubtless taking in every detail. With a beak he couldn't smile, but his phoenix self trilled instead. Hermione's eyes widened, as did her own smile. It seemed that his animagus form had the same effect as a regular phoenix did when he sang.

When Hermione stepped back and sat on her bed he flew over to her and changed. Harry stretched and lay down on the bed. Hermione shifted to lay down perpendicular to him and used his stomach as a pillow, looking up at the canopy of her bed.

Harry smiled and played with her hair absently. Despite the products he knew she used in her hair it felt like it had just been washed. There were muggles that would kill for those potions.

"You saw Charlie this weekend?" Hermione asked, smiling just a little.

"Yeah," Harry did not elaborate. He didn't really want to talk about that weekend, the Dursleys, or Charlie. He would show her the scroll though. He knew he could enlist Hermione's help in his cause. After all, he had actually joined S.P.E.W. Hermione owed him.

She turned to lie on her side and look at him, "What's sex like?"

His eyes widened, "You mean you and Ron haven't..."

"No," Hermione frowned. "He said something about those visions he got from the brains. It's like he's afraid or something." She sighed, "He'll do, well, anything else really, but not that one thing. It's not like... I mean I'm not..." She just flushed and huffed in frustration.

"Did he see something specific?" Harry asked, propping himself on his elbows.

Hermione shrugged, "He won't say. He gets confused and upset whenever I bring it up. I think... it's like he knows we shouldn't... but doesn't know why."

"What do you want to know?" Harry asked, opening up his empathy. Something about the castle made it possible for him to open up fully but not sense anyone outside the room he was in if that was what he wanted.

Hermione was curious, as she always was, but this wasn't really something she could find out in a book. There was also a sad yearning. She might have intellectually understood why Ron was holding out, but something in her couldn't comprehend his reasoning, or lack thereof.

"Just... how does it feel?"

Harry let himself fall back against the pillows. He closed his eyes and pulled up his memories. Practicing Occlumency had somehow made his mind more organized and it was so easy to call up vivid memories.

"It's like... your body is a jigsaw puzzle... and it was put together on a background exactly like the picture of the puzzle... so you feel all your life like the puzzle is complete... and then, it's like there's this missing piece that you find... and you wonder how you never knew it was missing," Harry spoke without thinking.

"Wow," Hermione breathed. She lifted her head off his stomach and Harry opened his eyes to see her lying on her stomach with her head propped up in her hands, looking at him. "You love him, don't you?"

Harry sat up quickly, snapping out his haze of memory, "What? No 'Mione. I can't. We just... he's just... he understands me, and I mean really understands me. It's not love Hermione."

"Are you sure?" Hermione gave him that look that said she knew what was really going on and it was no good lying to her.

"I'm sure," he glared but his gaze softened quickly. "I haven't really talked to you guys a lot, have I?" Harry felt guilt coming up again. He had been busy with training and getting to know his father and dragons and Charlie, and Ron and Hermione had been busy with each other.

"Sure you have Harry. It's just, there's so much you can't tell us, and I understand that," Hermione rationalized. "We're your friends Harry, but you don't have to tell us every little thing. You're allowed some secrets."

"Over last Christmas, when we were taking down the blocks on my magic, we found out I have empathy... really strong empathy," Harry admitted. He had been reading people so much without them knowing that he didn't really see it as an intrusion. It was just like he could see or hear better, only he could feel better.

Hermione's eyes widened again and she sat up with her legs crossed, "Really?" He nodded. "And Charlie has it too. Ron mentioned it once, and then said something about you, but I didn't pick it up then." She frowned. "How did Ron find out?" Hermione hated being the last to know anything.

"I was projecting at him," Harry smiled at her reaction, typical Hermione. "He picked up on it as something Charlie had done to him before."

Hermione nodded slowly, "So you always know what he's feeling when you're... together."

"I block it a lot," Harry looked down and picked at the fraying hem of his jeans. It was as close as he would get to admitting that he thought she might be right. "I... 'Mione, you know what will happen to anyone who's associated with me that way. Even if you were right, which I'm not saying you are, it couldn't happen, not now."

Hermione just nodded and waited, drawing him out. He did not want this conversation, not with Hermione, not with his father, not with Charlie, not even with himself. Harry held out his hand and summoned the scroll from McGonagall, opening it on the bed.

"What's this?" Hermione was distracted, as usual, by a mystery. It was a relief.

"Names," Harry said as he read down the list, "of all the new orphans from the attacks on Halloween. In ten years the first of them will be students here."

"They're all muggle-born?" Hermione was clearly offended, angered.

"Every one of them... all the muggle-borns of that age actually," Harry narrowed his eyes. He told her about the letter from Voldemort and the pensieve, and his determination to ensure Voldemort was not successful in his intention.

They went over the list, reading what McGonagall had compiled in the short time she had. There were names for guardians of about half of the children, and multiple family members for a dozen others. Hermione instantly got some of her own parchment and a few quills and they went back down to her shared common room. Leaning over the scroll they organized all the information and Hermione helped him firm up his plans.

It was a little surprising when Malfoy joined them, but his knowledge of the wizarding legal system and politics came in very useful. He even agreed that the infants who were with good muggle relatives should be left there to minimize their trauma. The Slytherin had come a long way in what were really only a few months.

"I've been thinking about what you said Harry," Malfoy said once they had set the scroll aside.

Harry noticed that the Slytherin would often use his first name when they were alone, and now with Hermione there as well.

"Which thing Draco?" Harry returned the courtesy. They had talked about several things though, so he had no idea which one Malfoy was referring to.

Draco twirled a quill between his fingers, "You said you knew nothing about the wizarding world before you got on the train, and there are still things that surprise you."

"Yeah, like funerals," Harry mumbled. Both Draco and Hermione looked at him in confusion. He elaborated for both of them, "Muggles have really serious and solemn services and burials." Malfoy's eyes widened, "Yeah, the person is buried in a wooden box. Wizards completely eliminate any remains and have a celebration of the person's life."

"That sounds nice," Hermione said a bit hesitantly. "Will you have one for Sirius?"

Harry nodded, "Dad said he would help me plan when everything's official."

"Anyway," Malfoy brought them back from their tangent, "I was thinking we could start a school for muggle-borns to introduce them to our world before they come to Hogwarts."

Harry instantly liked the idea and could feel barely contained excitement from Hermione. She was nearly projecting it and it was all Harry could do not to be infected by her enthusiasm, "It's a good idea. We could use The Book to know who to enroll, and even have specific days for the parents to come too and learn about us."

"That would be wonderful!" Hermione was almost leaping out of her seat. "I can only tell my parents so much in the summer... and I haven't been able to actually show them any magic yet so all they've seen is Diagon Alley and moving pictures from my books and such."

Her eyes lit up, "You could have field trips, maybe to a quidditch game, to the Ministry and St. Mungo's, and Diagon Alley and Hogsmeade of course. You'd have to finish that year of their muggle education of course. There are so many important things they learn then."

Harry grinned at Malfoy, who was watching Hermione in a bit of wide eyed awe. When you got her started on an idea it just snowballed.

"Where would we hold it?" Harry interrupted. Hermione scowled at him but pulled out a fresh sheet of parchment and began jotting down her ideas.

Malfoy shrugged, "Between us we must have a property somewhere that would be appropriate. It wouldn't have to be too big if we didn't board the students, and then there would only be one meal to take care of each day. Failing that you and I can certainly afford to build something."

"True," Harry nodded slowly. "Who would teach?"

"Mostly muggle-borns I would think," Malfoy said cautiously. "They would understand better the differences and what needed to be taught. You and I would be their Board of Governors. I intend to take my father's seat on the Hogwarts Board once I graduate."

"It's not filled?" Harry asked. Hermione's quill continued to scratch, probably outlining a complete syllabus. They would have to put her on their Board too. She would contribute all her thoughts regardless so it might as well be official.

Draco shook his head, "There's just the one vacant seat now, and I expect a few more will open when they get exposed as Death Eaters."

Harry nodded thoughtfully. He had considerable influence already he knew, but no real knowledge on how to use it. He would have to learn about politics, Harry decided. There were many things wrong with the world that had adopted him and he didn't trust anyone else to fix them.

"How would I go about getting one of those seats myself?" Harry asked Malfoy, looking him directly in the eye.

Malfoy smiled slowly, "The headmaster could arrange it, or your father probably could. If you don't want to rely on them though, just announce publicly that you have an interest in the future of Hogwarts and they'll be begging you to take a seat. Just wait until I take the Malfoy seat. I'm sure they'd add another for you, but not for me."

"The power of the press," Harry muttered and Hermione chuckled.

"Use your pet reporter wisely," Malfoy smirked. "Your Boy-Who-Lived status can be used for so much more than you've tried so far, though Halloween was a nice start."

Harry and Hermione both grinned. He had planned to use the letters to get Sirius exonerated, even if it was posthumously, but the timing had been Ron's idea, and the dramatics were thanks to Hermione. The three of them still made a good team.

Ron came in from his Occlumency lesson then, looking tired and irritated. If he was surprised to see Malfoy, Harry, and Hermione working together it didn't show, "So, what did I miss?"

Finding the Key - Chapter 32

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