dougzone

Frenchman claims NASA has had �Close Encounters of the Sexual Kind�

Cape Canaveral, Fla. � French astronomer, Pierre Kohler, has claimed in his new book that NASA has held experiments involving males and females trying different sexual positions while in zero-gravity.  NASA is denying that any such activities have ever occurred.

�We have never considered intravehicular activities like this,� NASA spokesman, Ed Campion declared almost believably.  �We have only allowed women on-board shuttles to keep the women�s rights activists off our launch sites.�

�Why else would they have women flying in space,� questioned Larry Flint, the Hustler Magazine creator.  �Those fly boys have had their fill of flight attendants by the time they become astronauts.�

Kohler went on to reveal that NASA has narrowed the number of positions to ten.  The so-called traditional position has been deemed to be impossible in space.

Recently divorced and former movie starlet, Jane Fonda, has announced that she will free herself from her not-do-busy schedule to prove Campion wrong.  �I will remake an old flick of mine called Barbarella in which there was plenty of simulated zero-gravity sex.  I believe that this Frenchy is not all wet.�

Meanwhile, Canadian, pretty-boy-astronaut, Marc Garneau, has declared his disgust with the announcement.  �I was up there twice and they never had a woman on-board with me, if you know what I mean.  If they were going to offer spacehumping, you would think that they would have asked me to get involved, eh?�

An anonymous former female astronaut was heard to say, "Well, I guess NASA stands for 'National Aeronautic Sex Agency' after all.  Why do you think they invented the name Sally Ride?"

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COPYRIGHT WASTE OF INC. 2000