dougzone

To boldly go where no man has gone before, for groceries!

Palo Alto, CA � A US astronomer using a 12-meter (that�s metre to the rest of the world) radio telescope has found sugar in space.  He detected signals that are a signature for the presence of a type of sugar molecule known as glycolaldehyde in a cloud of gas and dust that is 26 000 light-years away.

�Yeehah,� yeehahed Billy Joe Bob �Bubba� Smith-Jones, the astronomer.  �This all means that we all can go to space and not worry �bout getting a hankering for sweets.  Now we knows that there is sugar out there, there was always cheese on the moon and milk in that there Milky Way.�

No one had the nerve to suggest that going for sugar 26 000 light-years away would be equivalent to shopping at the IGA in Antarctica when there is one just down the street, not to mention the moon/cheese myth and the Milky Way misnomer. 

�You see, NASA has always been concerned that long space flights would have to carry enough vittles to keep them astronauts healthy,� Smith-Jones added as he continued to impress the throng.  �Now, them flyboys can just take their credit cards and shop while they�re all on route!�

Stunned reporters were reluctant to correct Prof. Smith-Jones before he had completed making a total ass of himself.

Taking no hint from the shocked faces at his press conference, Smith-Jones added in conclusion, �Of course, to keep them flyboys happy, we would have to give them some jugs so they all could collect real moonshine when they stop for the cheese.�

After Bubba left the stage, a caretaker approached the microphone and made the following statement, �I�m afraid to tell my boss that I spilled a coffee with triple Sweet�n Low on his console.  I suspect that it may have affected his findings adversely.  I�ll be sure to tell him tomorrow when he awakes from his private shindig.�

Boldly went for groceries?

Manager at gallactic IGA?

COPYRIGHT WASTE OF INC. 2000

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