Dr. I. M. Shaw of the Guild of Undiscovered Scientists (Founded in 2105AD) wrote, "We have noticed a serious shortage of metal began to occur sometime after about the year 1970. Once these people were blessed with abundance; and had many things made of metal. But as time went on their cars became thinner and thinner. They also became smaller. Car manufacturers used the excuse that this made the car safer to continue car sales. This strange claim seemed to have been accepted by the general population as being accurate".

"Yes", says Prof Toff of Nosomethin University, "we have found that metals became so rare that instead of people having good metal wrist watches, as were had, they began to have poor quality plastic watches. Car door fittings began to be made of plastic also. This is further evidence of a definite extreme shortage of metal".

Scholar Dolla of the B. Ackward University states, "the people at that time also had problems with some (now extinct) creatures which destroyed their forests. These creatures were themselves eventually destroyed, but apparently created a severe wood shortage in the meantime. It is interesting to note that these creatures didn't entirely eat the wood whole but left nothing but piles of wood chips. Thus the people had to glue the wood together and make what was termed by them as 'chipboard'".

"This is true", declares Prof Toff. He goes on further to say; "these creatures obviously had poor eyesight and therefore could only see the trees. Once there were only chips remaining the creatures couldn't see them".

Dr. Weeno of the Blue Foundation for Unemployed Scientists wrote, "These creatures also must not have had molars for grinding down the wood and thus we see the large amount of chips of wood left. So this would have been a creature with very sharp teeth for destroying the trees. The people obviously took advantage of its blindness and lay down so they wouldn't be eaten. The trees however were standing up and so were seen. The creatures weren't large, as it was very skilled at avoiding the trees as they fell. It had ways of communicating with the other creatures of it's type (we call them a 'Chopup-a-neversaurs') to move as the trees were falling".

Prof. Soritt of the Bentmii Home for Wayward Scientists said, "this shortage of building material was also noted in the houses where later houses were often poorly constructed and many large buildings had to use glass instead of brick. What they termed 'building inspectors' seem to have been hired to make sure that this was done".

Dr. Tocktor, of Spaestowt Research, in regard this shortage stated, "the shortage of metal at this period also stopped a vigorous space program. Evidence shows that they had been sending rocket ships into the outer atmosphere. They may have even been trying to get to the moon. But because of the price of metal rising NASA had to go into the manufacture of commercial airplanes. They designed and manufactured a new two winged airplane called a 'space shuttle'. However there wasn't much space in the shuttle at all. And it didn't carry many passengers but were very strong; and so were obviously made for the rich only".

Reverend Pae Mei of the Florwoble Pentecostal Church said, "the scientists inform us that the people back then had a strange religious cult. It required people to have a box (made of wood or plastic) in the main family room. They called it an 'Idiot Box'. It appears to have been an item of worship for each family. All homes were required to have these; and it is possible that disobedience meant death".

"Yes", states Dr. D Eth (with a Doctorate in Ancient Religions) of Saint Adam's Church of Iceland, "these boxes must have been used by parents who put a child on them when they did something stupid. It is most probable that they had to stand on the idiot box for long periods and worship the box. After doing this, the box obviously would need cleaning. Cleaning it afterward would have been part of the punishment".

Prof L Aisea of the Laust University stated, "research shows they had a large civilisation. We have found evidence of buildings as high as seven stories. We have found that they used a primitive type of concrete. Large concrete stones were placed one upon another in some of their buildings. How they got these stones up there remains a mystery. Today we would just use cranes. Some feel that they must have built dirt platforms and used slave labour to drag the stones up there. Evidence for this theory has arisen in the discovery of many small boards with wheels underneath. Obviously the boards were designed by the ancients for some kind of carriage purpose. Some argue that the weight of the stones would have crushed these boards. But the general consensus amount scientists today is that with a sufficient number of these boards it would have been possible".