Chapter Four 

 

 

With a deep blush Brooke broke away from the kiss.  “Captain Payne, I er, I uh.”

“Too fast?” He asked.  “Sorry, just consider it a friendly kiss.  The last thing in the world I want to do is rush you.” He smiled and touched her lips with his finger.  “But damn, you’re so kissable.”  Again a blush spread across her face.  “You’re so cute, it’s almost childlike the way you blush.” He told her.

“Now you’re embarrassing me.” She said softly.  “It’s not like I’m an inexperienced virgin.  I just, well, I’m not usually so forward with strangers.”

“We’re not strangers are we?” He asked with a frown.

“Not exactly, but we really don’t know each other.” Brooke admitted.

“We’ll just have to remedy that.” He smiled at her.  “You look really tired.” He said with concern.

“That’s what happens when you go to hell and back I suppose.” Brooke sighed.  “Nick, can we do this some other time?  I’m really not good company.”

Nick gave her a pensive look and then led her to the table.  He sat her down and took the chair next to her.  “If you really don’t want me here I’ll go, but I honestly don’t think it’s a good idea for you to be all alone.  I’m not going to pressure you to talk about it or to do anything else for that matter, just think of me as a friend, one who’s here to listen, if you want to talk, or just to hold your hand.  But again, it’s up to you.”

“You’re making me feel guilty, and selfish too.” She started to nervously play with a strand of hair. Then she abruptly stood up.  “Okay, I’ll try and cook something, after all, I did promise.”

“Sit.” He ordered her.  “In fact, why don’t you go out to the living room and sit on the couch or even take a nap.  I’ll scare something up for us.”

“You?” She laughed.

“I’m a pretty good cook.” He admitted. “And I’ve been providing for myself for a long, long time Brooke.”

“But I promised you.” She started to protest.

“And someday soon I’ll hold you to it, but tonight, let me take care of you.”

“That’s very sweet of you Nick.” She gave him a small smile.

“It is.”  He smiled.  “Now scoot.” He laughed and walked her to the door.  “I promise I won’t make too much of a mess too.  Just go and relax, please.”

“Nick.” Brooke turned and looked into his eyes. 
“Yeah?”

“Thank you.”

 

 

Thomas Forrester’s eyes widened like saucers as he opened the front door. “Bridget!” He happily exclaimed.  “Are you back? Did you come home to live again?”

A blush crossed the young woman’s face.  “No honey, at least not right now.”

“But.” Thomas started with a pout.  Before he could continue his though the room erupted with the gleeful shouts from the twins.

“Bwidget! Bwidget!” They both screamed as they ran to her and hugged her.

“Oh I missed you all so much.” Bridget told them as she pulled Thomas into the hug.  “I love you all so much.”

“Pwease come and live here again Bwidget.” Phoebe begged.

“Oh yes, pwease!” Steffie agreed as she tugged on Bridget’s arm.  “We muss you so much! Even your cooking!”

“Even my cooking?” Bridget laughed as she tousled their hair.

“Well, maybe not that.” Thomas admitted.  “But we really do want you back.”

“I know.” Bridget said with a sigh.  “But things are different now.”

“No they’re not.” Thomas complained with a deep sigh.  “Dad didn’t marry Brooke, so you can come back and things can be normal again.  Please.” He gave her a hopeful look.

“I promise I won’t stay away.” Bridget conceded, trying to placate them.  “How about that? Is that a deal?”

“If it’s the best you can do.” Thomas reluctantly agreed.

“For now.” Bridget said, trying to keep the hopeful glint from her eyes.  “Is your Dad home?”

“He’s upstairs on the phone.” Thomas explained.  “I can go get him.”

“That’s okay.” Bridget smiled.  “Let him finish his call, how about I read you another chapter of that book?”

“Yay!” Phoebe shouted. 

“I’ll go get it!” Steffie said happily. 

“Okay.” Bridget laughed.  As Steffie headed up the stairs Bridget led Thomas and Phoebe to the couch.

 

 

Brooke was reaching for the latest “Eye on Fashion” when the phone rang.  She frowned as she read the name on her caller ID.  Angrily she grabbed the receiver.  “Ridge, I told you it’s over.  Leave me alone! I have nothing to say to you! Nothing!”

“Logan listen to me, we need to talk, we need to fix this.” Ridge begged.

“Fix it?” She screeched in a shrill voice.  “How can we fix incest?”

“Nothing happened Brooke.” He said with a sigh. 

“Something sure did happen Ridge.  You kissed her, you kissed her and declared your love for her.  God knows what else happened when no one was around!”

“Nothing else.  I swear it Brooke, nothing else happened.  I know it was wrong, I know I was wrong.  Please give me a chance to make things right.  I love you Logan, you’re going to be my wife.”

“In your dreams!” Brooke shouted at him.  She turned towards the kitchen, hoping she hadn’t alerted Nick to her troubles and then in a calmer voice turned back to the phone.  “Ridge, we have nothing else to say to each other.  What we had is over, it can’t be fixed.  We can never go back again.  This is not just a case of you leaving me for a more appropriate woman.  This is you lusting after my daughter! The girl you delivered! The girl you helped me raise.  Please Ridge, please stop calling me.”

“Logan.” He moaned.

“Don’t call me that Ridge.” She said as her eyes filled with tears.

“I won’t give up on us.  I love you, I know how much I love you now. I won’t give up.  I WILL make you believe in us again.”

“Stop it!” Brooke screamed.  “Stop it Ridge! I can’t take this I can’t deal with you I can’t deal with.”

“Logan?” Ridge questioned as her voice was cut off. 

“If you call here again Forrester, if you bother the lady one more time, it will be me that you have to deal with. You got that? Do you?” Nick angrily announced to the stunned man on the other side.  He put his arm protectively around the shaking woman.  “Now you stop calling and you stop harassing her.  Do you hear me Forrester?”

“Payne? Is that you Payne?” Ridge questioned.

“It is.” Nick confirmed.  “Good night Forrester.” He said, and then he placed the receiver into it’s cradle as Ridge shouted out his name.

“Nick, I was alright.” Brooke looked up into his deep blue eyes.  “I could handle him.”

“You didn’t seem to be doing a really good job of it.” He told her.  “I’m sorry if I overstepped my bounds but I refuse to see a lady I care about in distress.” He flashed her a brilliant smile.

“Thank you again Nick.” Brooke smiled back.  “He was being very persistent.  But you just don’t understand our history.”

“History be damned Brooke, the guy needs to back off and give you space.  When and if you want to talk again, that needs to be your call, not his.”

“Are you always such a hero?” Brooke asked with a smile. 

“I’ll be your hero whenever you need one my lady.” He leaned down, took her hand, brought it to his mouth and gently kissed it.  “Now you rest, don’t answer the phone again, that’s why you have an answering machine, and I’ll finish dinner.”

Brooke smiled as he let her go and walked back into the kitchen.  “I think you’re a very good man to have around Captain Payne, a very good man.”

 

 

“Who is Daddy yelling at?” Steffie asked Thomas and Bridget.  The sounds from upstairs had intensified. 

“Is someone here Thomas?” Bridget asked.

“Just us, and Catherine.” He answered with a frown. 

“Maybe he’s on the phone.” Bridget wondered aloud.  “I think I’ll go up and check on him, make sure everything is okay.  You guys wait here.”

“Okay Bwidget.” Phoebe answered her. 

Bridget headed up the stairs.  She hesitated at the door to Ridge’s bedroom. Lovingly she touched the frame and the doorknob.  Images and dreams filled her head.  In her fantasy she was wearing a soft flowing white nightgown.  She opened the door to find Ridge waiting on the bed.  He wore nothing but silky black pajama bottoms.  Bridget hugged herself as she was overcome with desire.  Then she let herself return to her fantasy. 

“Hello Princess.” Fantasy Ridge said with a smile.  He opened his arms wide.  “Come to me, come to me my beautiful love.”

“Ridge.” Fantasy Bridget sighed.  “I’ve waited so long for tonight and it’s finally here.  I love you, I love you so very much.”

“And I you my darling one.” His eyes twinkled with love and desire.  

Fantasy Bridget walked inside. Suddenly the room was filled with soft candlelight and the sounds of  “A Man and a Woman” came from the small record player.  “Our song.” She whispered.  “It’s perfect, it’s all so perfect Ridge.”

“You’re my wife now Bridget.” Fantasy Ridge told her.  “Just as Taylor wanted it.  You are my wife and now the mother to my children.”

“Our children.” Fantasy Bridget reminded him.  “And now you are going to make me a woman, a real woman.” In Bridget’s fantasy there was no Deacon, there was no sham of a marriage, she was pure again, pure for the one man she desired above all others.

“Like I always dreamed.” Fantasy Ridge smiled.  “Never before, never before have I had such a pure and beautiful woman.  And you’re mine, all mine. Come to me now Princess, let me teach you all about love.”

“My darling Ridge.” She sighed and started the long walk to him.  “Take me, take me now.”

With a flush Bridget jumped back into reality.  “If only.” She sighed.  Then with a knock on the door she called out to him.  “Ridge? Ridge it’s me, Bridget.  Is everything alright?”

“Bridget.” Ridge said softly.  He was still staring at the receiver in his hand.  He put it into it’s cradle.  “Come on in, everything’s fine.” He announced.

The door opened and the young woman entered.  She was lovely and she had somehow captivated him, but that had destroyed his happiness and he knew now he had to find a way to end it all.  “Hello Princess.” He said with a smile. 

“We heard shouting.  I, er, the children were worried.”

“I didn’t know you were here.” Ridge walked over to her. 

“I just, well I.  Oh Ridge, after last night.” She weakened and looked him deeply in the eyes. 

“That was a mistake Bridget.  I was so confused.” He absently brushed a long lock of his hair back from his forehead.

“You were talking to HER.” Bridget suddenly realized.

“I was trying to.” Ridge admitted.

“I don’t, I don’t understand.” She whimpered.

“That’s the whole problem Bridget, I don’t think either of us really understands.  I don’t know what happened or how it happened and how it went so far.  All that I know is that it can’t continue. That and that I love Brooke and I AM going to marry her.”

“But you kissed me, you wanted me Ridge.  We almost made love.” She protested.

“But we stopped.” Ridge reminded her.

“No.  Only because of Dad, if he hadn’t come in we would have, I know we would have.”

“No Princess.” Ridge said sadly.  “We would have both come to our senses.”

“So it’s over? It’s really over?” Bridget couldn’t hold back her tears.

“I’ll always love you Bridget, you’ll always be my Princess.” He took her into his arms and held her, gently stroking her hair.

 

 

Nick walked out to the living room and smiled at the sight in front of him.  Brooke was sitting on the floor, playing with her daughter.  The love was so deep it permeated the entire room.  “So this is your daughter.” He stated.

“Yes.” Brooke looked up and grinned.  “Nick Payne, meet Hope Logan.”

“Well hello Hope.” Nick kneeled down next to the child.  “She’s lovely, just like her mother.”

“Why thank you Captain Payne.” Brooke answered, pretending to be Hope.

“And smart too.  Talking at such a young age.” Nick laughed.  “I bet she gets her brains from her mommy.”

“Thanks, I guess.” Brooke giggled. 

“Well, I don’t know her Dad so I’m just going by what I’ve seen.” Nick grinned.  “Anyway, dinner is ready.  But I guess we should get something for Hope too.”

“Yes.” Brooke smiled and stood up, lifting Hope as she did.  “Nick thank you again.  I feel so guilty having invited you and you doing all the work.”

“Nah, it’s not much.  Don’t thank me till you taste it anyway.” He took her arm.  “And you were right, most everything was frozen so well, I hope you like omelets.”

“I do.” Brooke gave him another smile.  “I like them very much.”  Nick led her into the kitchen where he had set the table for them.  There were two plates filled with soft, fluffy omelets and fried potatoes.  “It looks delicious.” Brooke told him. She gently put Hope into her chair.

“Cheese, ham and peppers with home fries, not much but it’ll go down easy and tonight that may just be what’s best anyway.  Anyway, I always thought of eggs as sort of comfort food, you know, when in doubt make breakfast.  I thought it would go down easy for you.  What about Hope? Does she eat eggs?” He asked.

“Yes she does, but nothing so fancy.” Brooke explained.  “She just had a bottle so she’s not hungry yet.  I’ll give her some baby food after we’re done eating.”

“I hope you’re hungry.” Nick said with a smile. 

“I can eat a bit.  Nick, I do appreciate this, but I just don’t have much of an appetite.”

“Forrester.” He stated.

“You just don’t understand.” Brooke protested.

“I understand better than you think Brooke.” He reached for the pepper mill.  After grinding some on his plate he turned to Brooke.  “Pepper?” He asked.

“Thank you.” She said, and then continued as Nick ground some pepper onto her omelet.  “I loved him for so long, it’s so hard to give up on a dream.”

“Maybe that’s all it was ever meant to be.” Nick shrugged.  “Sometimes we have to watch the waves wash things away, and then sometimes they carry something new to us, something we never expected but something that really fits.”

“How do we know when it’s time?” Brooke wondered.

“We don’t always know.” Nick took a bite.  “But if we just give it a chance, it’s amazing what we can find.”

“It’s scary.” Brooke confessed.

“Lot’s of things are scary, but that doesn’t make them bad.” Nick explained. 

“I want to let go, part of me thinks that I have, but then another part of me is still yearning.” Brooke sighed.  “But what is it yearning for?” Nick asked.  “Certainly not what you had.”

“Maybe something I thought we could have.” Brooke said sadly.  “We came so close.” She shut her eyes as a tear rolled down her cheek.

“But it was you who said no.  Aren’t you even a little proud of yourself?” Nick asked her. 

“Proud?” Brooke squinted at him.  “What is there to be proud of?  I ran out of my own wedding.  I made a scene, I embarrassed Ridge and my family.”

“You’re worried about Forrester?” Nick was stunned. “After what he did to you?”

“He said he was confused.” Brooke said in defense of her former fiancé.

“Confused?” Nick snickered.  “Sorry honey but I don’t buy it and I don’t think you do either.”

“I’d like to.” Brooke sighed again.

“But you don’t.” Nick put his hand on top of her smaller one.  “Brooke, I’m not criticizing you.   I know you can’t just get past this overnight.  But you will.  In time you will be stronger and you’ll wonder why he had this hold on you for so long.  Maybe you’ll even be able to be friends with him.”

“Friends.” Brooke smiled nostalgically.  “Ridge was always my best friend.  Maybe we should have left it at that.  But I loved him Nick, I loved him so much.”

“You still do.” Nick stated.  “But the love will fade to a more appropriate love.  You’ll move on Brooke, I promise you.  It may hurt but you will survive.”

“I’m not so sure.” Brooke said sadly.

“I am.” Nick smiled at her and squeezed her hand.  “I’m sure of it.”

“And why are you so sure?” Brooke asked with another of her characteristic squints.

“Because I’m going to be right here helping you.” He looked deeply into her eyes.  “That is if you’ll have me.”

“I’ll have you.” She whispered softly. And for the first time in a long time she felt like the future might not be all that dark after all.

 

 

Bridget walked to the window and peered out.  Tears filled her eyes and spilled down onto her cheeks.  Ridge didn’t want her, he didn’t and she wanted to die.  Why did her mother have to ruin everything? “I hate her! I hate her!” Bridget couldn’t help the words from coming out.  Ridge walked up to her and put his hand on her shoulder.

“No you don’t Bridget.  She’s your mother.”

She turned to angrily face him.  “It wasn’t so long ago when you were encouraging me to admit it.  What’s changed? Why did it change Ridge?” She reached up and stoked his cheek. 

“I don’t know how to explain it to you Princess.” He said softly.  “I guess when she walked out on me it really opened my eyes.  It’s her, it’s always been her.  I love her.”

“Even after what she did to me?” Bridget wanted him to remember, she wanted him to resent her mother again, like she did. 

“Bridget what she did,” He started.  “What she did was wrong, but I know now that I had a part in that, I drove her to it.”

“No!”

“Yes Princess, I did and I’m not proud of myself for it.  I want you to try and understand, I know she hurt you but I want you to try and forgive her because she loves you, she loves you.”

“No! No!” Bridget sobbed. 

“Princess.” Ridge pulled her into his arms once more.  “Lose the hate, don’t let it control you, don’t let it take over your life, please don’t.”

“She stole my husband.” Bridget cried.

“You didn’t love him, you’re so much better without him.” Ridge tilted her face up towards his.

“She had his baby.” Bridget punched his chest.  “She had his baby! She had his baby and I hate her! I hate her and I hate Hope!”

“I know that.” Ridge sighed.  “And Hope is something that will be a constant reminder to both of you. But she’s a beautiful little baby and I know that you don’t really hate her.  You can’t hate an innocent child who never asked to be conceived.”

“She never should have been conceived and she never should have been born.” Bridget said through gritted teeth.

“Bridget.” Ridge said softly.  “She’s just an innocent baby.”

“Every time I look at her, every time all I see is how she betrayed me.”

“She hurt you, I know she did Princess, but she loves you.  Forgive her, please try and forgive her.”

Bridget pulled out of his embrace.  “Why? To make it easier for you? So you can marry her without feeling guilty?”

“I’m going to marry her either way.  I love her.”

“You love me.” Bridget sobbed.

“I do love you, but it was never that kind of love.  Bridget I never should have done what I did to you, and I’m sorry.  Forgive me, please forgive me.”

 

 

“You’re good at this, are you sure you don’t have a wife and family hidden around somewhere?” Brooke asked Nick with a giggle.  He had fed Hope a jar of baby food and now was giving her a bottle.

“You caught me.” Nick said with a laugh.

“You do?” Brooke gasped.

“No, just joking.” Nick smiled.  “There’s really no mystery to feeding a baby.”

“You’re just good to all women.” Brooke smiled.  “You’re good to me.”

“Coffee.” Nick said as he abruptly stood up. 

“I’ve embarrassed you.” Brooke said.  “I’m sorry.  But it’s true Nick, I don’t know what I would have done without you.”

“It was nothing.” Nick said as he scooped coffee into the paper filter.

“It was everything.” Brooke walked up to him and put her arm through his.  “Captain Payne, you are a wonderful man.”

Nick put down the scoop and turned to face her.  Their eyes met and they couldn’t seem to tear away from each other.  Suddenly he pulled her to him and crushed her mouth to his.  His lips hungrily explored hers as her arms wound around his neck. 

 

 

Stephanie jumped as Eric entered the house again, slamming the door.  She slowly walked up to him, not saying a word.  She was far too nervous.  She loved him and wanted to save her marriage.  How could she ever make him understand?

Eric shot her a look of disgust and walked to the carafe of liquor.  He poured himself a large glass and turned to face her.  “Do you know where Bridget is?” He finally spoke.

“No.” Stephanie answered. 

“CJ hasn’t seen her, though I suppose that isn’t as unusual as it would have been.  He knows, he knows all about Bridget and Ridge.  I guess everyone did but me, and her mother!” He put the drink down on an end table.  “Stephanie how could you let this happen?”

“I didn’t know. I swear I didn’t know Eric and once I did I tried so hard to keep them apart.”

“Keep them apart? Is that the only answer you had? What they did, it was so wrong, so sick.  It’s incest Stephanie! Incest.”

“No.” She said softly.  “They aren’t related.”

“They don’t share DNA!” Eric growled.  “But they ARE related.  They have been all their lives and don’t you DARE try and defend their actions!”

“I’m not.  I just thought.”

“No Stephanie, I don’t want to hear your excuses.  I know you’re going to find a way to blame this on Brooke but you’re wrong! She’s a victim! An innocent victim!”

“Innocent? Ha!” Stephanie spit.  “You seem to be forgetting she gave birth to her son-in-law’s child!”

“Hope’s paternity has nothing to do with the sickness going on around here!” Eric retorted.

“Of course it does.” Stephanie laughed.  “If Brooke hadn’t done what she did to that girl none of this would have happened, none of it!”

“You’re pathetic Stephanie.  You are so overcome with hatred that you can’t even think.  But I just don’t care anymore, not about you.”

“Eric, Eric please.”

“All these years, you kept this secret all these years.  My God Stephanie, with everything we’ve been through you’d think you could trust me, but no.” He gave her a look filled with disgust.

“Eric please.  I didn’t know.  I thought he was yours.  You don’t think I’d have kept this all this time?  I didn’t know and I didn’t know about Ridge and Bridget until things had gotten out of hand.  I’m trying to fix things, for all of us.  I love you Eric, please don’t walk out on us, please give us time to work this out.”

“There is nothing to work out.  You have Massimo now.  I’ve just come to get some clothing, I’m leaving you Stephanie, and this time for good.”

 

 

“You know you’re making a mistake.” Bridget sniffled.  “It’s not wrong Ridge, and I love you, I never felt this way about anyone.  I belong, I belong with you and the children.  I know Taylor would approve of us, a lot more than she ever would with Mom.”

“Taylor would be proud to see you helping out and guiding the kids.” Ridge agreed.  “But that’s because she knew you as my sister and she loved you.  Bridget it WAS wrong and I can’t even begin to understand why I let things get so out of hand.  I do blame Massimo, but I have to blame myself too.  I hurt you, I hurt Dad and most of all I hurt Brooke, the woman I love, the woman who WILL be my wife.”

“Don’t expect me to be happy for you.” Bridget looked at him with doe eyes. 

“No.” Ridge sadly agreed.  “But I hope in time, you will be.  We are all family Princess, and those ties won’t end when I marry your mother.  In fact, they’ll grow stronger.  We’ll have a whole new relationship, I promise we will.”

“I just don’t understand Ridge.  I know how upset you were with her.”

“Honey, you knew we got past that.  You knew Brooke and I got close again.” He walked to her and put his arm around her again.  “You were supporting us.”

“I just wanted to try, for you Ridge, just for you.”

“Then please Princess, please try again.” He gave her a smile.  “For me.”

“I’ll try.” She sighed.

“Er, Bridget, can I ask you something?”

“What?” Bridget frowned. 

“How does your mother know Nick Payne?”

“She doesn’t.” Bridget’s frown grew.  “I mean I think she may have met him at Marone when she went to see you, but she doesn’t really know him.  Why do you ask?”

“Because when I called her, he was there.” Ridge frowned and shrugged.  “It doesn’t make sense.  They have nothing in common, why would he be there?”

“How do you know he was there?” Bridget wondered.

“He took the phone from her and the son of a bitch told me off.” Ridge admitted.

“I don’t know Ridge.  But you know my Mom.  She’s probably trying to make you jealous.  All she ever does is play games.”

“Maybe.” Ridge smiled.  “But that means she still loves me.  Good, things may pick up a lot sooner than I had hoped.  Before long, she WILL be Mrs. Ridge Forrester.”

 

 

“Nick.” Brooke sighed as she pulled away from him.  “Things are moving too fast for me.”

“Are you asking me to apologize Brooke?” He asked.

“No, just to slow it down, please.”

“Can’t blame a man for being attracted to a beautiful woman.” He laughed.  His eyes sparkled with mischief and Brooke couldn’t help laughing with him. 

“I like your kisses.” She admitted.  “I’m just not sure I’m ready for them.”

“Maybe we should try one more, you know, see if you are?” He jokingly suggested.  But the look in his eyes and in Brooke’s showed them both it wasn’t a joke.

“Nick.” She laughed, but when he pulled her closer again she leaned in for his kiss.  It was short and sweet and delicious.  “Okay, maybe a part of me is ready, but the bigger part isn’t.” She touched his cheek with her fingertip.  “Maybe there is life without Ridge after all.”

“There are plenty of fish in the sea Brooke, you had a shark, time you tried something different.”

“Like an angel fish?” Brooke suggested. 

“Oh I’m no angel Brooke, no angel at all.” And with that he pulled her in for another kiss.

 

 

After Bridget had left Ridge had spent time watching a video with the children.  Then Catherine had volunteered to take them out for ice cream.  Ridge had declined the offer to join them and instead had used to time to do some deep soul searching.  He had made himself a pot of coffee and had picked up Taylor’s journal.  He missed her, he knew a part of him would always love her, but Brooke was his future.  “Doc.” He said as he fingered her photo.  “I know I’m doing the right thing.  I love Brooke, you always knew that, at one time you wanted us together, raising our kids and now I want to make that come true.  But I did something so stupid. I had a lack of judgement and I’ve hurt all the people that I love and who love me.  Help me Doc.  Please show me what to do to fix this?” With a sigh he put down the photo.  As he went to place the journals back into the desk drawer a card fell out.  Ridge picked it up and smiled.  “Thank you Doc, thank you so much.” He carried the card with him to the phone and punched in the number.  “Yes, Dr. Munoz, this is Ridge Forrester, I’d like to come and talk to you.  Can you find some time to see me tomorrow?”

 

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