My friend, Richard May, who is so brilliant that he leaves me gobsmacked and awestruck, is also one of the kindest and funniest people I know.

He wrote the following good-natured take-off on some of my writings. I can't remember the last time I laughed so hard.

I hope you enjoy it as much as I did. It is reposted here with his express, written permission. He has requested that I mention that he is neither pro or anti-Polyamory. The piece was only written in fun.

As a OmniAmorist and a MultiOmni I have little sympathy for you straightlaced uptight BiPolyAmorists, who whine about a lack of societal acceptance.
We OmniAmorists who are MultiOmni have a lack of acceptance by the very laws of physics! Moreover, you hidebound orthodox BiPolyAmorists are only interested in the macrolevel of phenomena. We go after the delicious subquantum phenomena too and bonding by strong and weak forces, not handfasting or marriage! Young juicy neutrinos and tight little photons are not as grave as gravitons. You "Bi"s are so straight. Have you ever felt the exquisite sensation of the annihlation of matter and antimatter or listened to the sounds of release of Hawking radiation, as your soul penetrates a black hole? You never have to deal with wave-particle duality or the Heisenburg uncertainty principle in your so-called PolyAmory. You don't have a clue what it's like to get a juicy young neutrino in bed only to discover that when you discover her location in spacetime, you don't know how fast she's moving or ... Damn that Heisenburg! You goto bed with a gamma wave and afterward she's a particle of different charm and spin, not to mention 'color', even in the quantum world. Her charm can make your head spin. And Pauli was no Poly with his exclusive "exclusion principle"! Try having a quantum non-local relationship with a succulent mu meson only to find her decaying into an entire family of bizarre vibrating Strings. (Incidentally, were the vibrating membranes of M-theory circumcized on the eight day? Is the Multiverse, itself, Jewish?) You get strung along by String Theory and how do you compete with the Big Bang? Try competing with the Big Bang in bed! I LOVE every wave-particle in the quantum foam, just as long as the feeling lasts beyond spacetime, or until my attention wanders, which ever comes first, true objective love. But what about objective lust, where is it to be found? So many warps in the spacetime continuum, vibrating Strings playing the music of Hermes and Pythagoras, as juicy wavicles dance seductively, and so few views from eternity.