Philosophy

Why, it's my philosophy. I'm a regular Socrates

12-6-02: Recently, I've had a blow to my base philosophy. I looked at my own philosophy, and realized that itmust sound to others like Christianity sounds to me. I couldn't understand how they could neglect my beliefs after I had carefully explained them. I thought about it a while, and realized that my thoughts had become a sort of religion when I could convert people to my beliefs. That's not what I wanted. Since then I have virtually shed all beliefs in the realization that I was just as bad as any other religious person. My religion wasn't any better. I believe now that there's nothing worth worshipping. That doesn't mean I have no morals or anything. I have a sense of self and thus I have morals. But recently, it seems I've been turning into an Existentialist. The only thing that matters is what's happening now. I get jided because I'm not motivated for college and the sort. Really though, what's the point? I don't feel like working nd studying for four years just so I can work for the rest of my life after that. That is the worst existence I can ever imagine. Hell on Earth perhaps? When was the last time someone actually lived?

12-7-02: Screw the theme of philosophy for this text insert. I'd rather talk about something more interesting for the moment. My classmates. I've read an article in the school newspaper titled "The Man." It's interesting. One person each month writes to 'The Man' about their dating and love life, and 'The Man' responds in the next issue. They're very lonely letters of want and emptiness. I have a few ideas that sprung from these articles. Situation: these people are lonely, and feel empty just being by themselves. Idea: Would these people actually be truly changed by getting a partner? I personally don't think so. I don't think they'd be satisfied. I think one has to be truly self-sufficient and independent before they can find satisfaction in relationships.
I have a sense of loneliness myself. I'm not going to be a hypocrite and say mine is better than theirs is. i get the urge to travel. To escape sort of. My loneliness stems from routine. Being around people doesn't change it, unless they're brand new people. I think it's time for a vacation.